Oliver  Optic 


THE  UPWAKD  AND  ONWABJ)  SEEIES, 

1.  Field  and  Forest;   OR,  THE  FORTUNES  OF  A  FARMER 

2.  Plane  and  Plank  ;  OR,  THE  MISHAPS  OF  A  MECHANIC 

3.  Desk  and  Debit ;  OR,  THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK 

4.  Cringle    and    Cross-Tree;   OR,  THE    SEA   SWASHES 

OF  A  SAILOR. 

5.  Hivouac  and  Battle  ;  OR,  THE  STRUGGLES  OF  A  SOLDIER, 

6.  Sect  and  Shore;  OR,  THE  TRAMPS  OF  A  TRAVELLER. 


THE    UPWARD  AND    ONWARD   SERIES. 


DESK  AND  DEBIT; 


OR, 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK. 


BY 


OLIVER    OPTIC, 

AUTHOR  OF  "YOUNG   AMERICA  ABROAD,"   "THE  ARMY  AND  NAVY  STORIES," 

"THE  WOODVILLE  STORIES,"   "THE  BOAT-CLUB  STORIES,"  "THE 

STARRY  FLAG  SERIES,"   "  THE  LAKE-SHORE 

SERIES,"  ETC. 


WITH  FOURTEEN  ILLUSTRATIONS. 


BOSTON 
LEE   AND   SHEPARD   PUBLISHERS 


Entered,  according  to  Act  of  Congress,  in  the  year  1871, 

BY  WILLIAM  T.   ADAMS, 
In  the  Office  of  the  Librarian  of  Congress,  at  Washington. 

COPYRIGHT,  1S99,  BY  ALICE  ADAMS  BUSSELL. 


All  Rights  Reserved. 


DESK  AND  DEBIT. 


PS 


TO  THE  MEMORY  OF 


MY  GOOD-NATURED  AND  VERSATILE  YOUNG  FRIEND 


EDWIN  A.  FARWELL, 

WHO,  SINCE   THIS  BOOK  WAS  WRITTEN,  HAS   PASSED  AWAY  FROM 

THK    SCENES   OF    EARTH,   LOVED  AND   RESPECTED 

BY  ALL  WHO   KNEW  HIM, 


IS  AFFECTIONATELY  DEDICATED. 


M189735 


PREFACE. 


"DESK  AND  DEBIT"  is  the  third  of  "THE  UPWARD  AND 
ONWARD  SERIES,"  in  which  Phil  Farringford  appears  as  a 
clerk.  The  principal  events  of  the  story  are  located  in  Chicago 
and  on  Lake  Michigan  —  the  latter,  perhaps,  because  the  author 
finds  it  quite  impossible  to  write  a  story  without  a  boat,  which 
also  involves  the  necessity  of  a  broad  sheet  of  water,  or  a  long 
river.  In  this,  as  in  its  predecessors,  evil-minded  characters 
are  introduced,  to  show  the  contrast  between  vice  and  virtue; 
but  the  hero,  in  whom  the  sympathies  of  the  reader  are  sup 
posed  to  be  centred,  is  still  faithful  to  his  Christian  duties,  still 
reads  his  Bible,  and  "  prays  without  ceasing." 

Young  and  old  are  injured  only  by  the  precept  and  example 
of  those  whom  they  love,  respect,  or  admire ;  and  the  writer  has 
no  fear  that  his  readers  will  love,  respect,  or  admire  Charles 
Whippleton  or  Ben  Waterford,  or  that  they  will  fail  to  condemn 
their  errors  and  their  vices.  The  author  hopes  and  expects 
that  his  young  friends,  while  they  follow  Phil  in  his  exciting 
experience  in  the  counting-room,  and  in  the  "  Marian  "  on  Lake 
Michigan,  will  love  and  respect  his  virtues  as  well  as  his 
courage  and  resolution. 

HARRISON  SQUARE,  BOSTON, 

June  7,  1870. 


CONTENTS. 


CHAPTER    I. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  HAS  A  TALK  WITH  HIS  FATHER,  AND  RE 
VIEWS  HIS  PAST  HISTORY 11 

CHAPTER  II. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  STARTS  FOR  CHICAGO,   AND  HEARS  A  FA 
MILIAR  NAME 22 

CHAPTER    III. 
IN    WHICH    PHIL     MAKES    THE    ACQUAINTANCE    OF    MRS. 

WHIPPLETON 33 

CHAPTER    IV. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  is  CHIVALROUS,  BUT  HAS  HIS  EYES  OPENED.     44 

CHAPTER    V. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  TAKES  A  ROOM   AT   MRS.  WHIPPLBTON'S 

BOARDING-HOUSE 56 

CHAPTER    VI. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL   is   ENGAGED  AS  ENTRY  CLERK  FOR  COL- 

LINGSBY   AND    WHIPPLETON 67 

CHAPTER    VII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  TAKES  HIS  PLACE  AT  THE   DESK,  AND  is 

ENGAGED    FOR    A    YEAR 79 

CHAPTER    VIII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL   TAKES  A  SAIL  ON  THE  LAKE  WITH  MR. 

WHIPPLETON 90 

7 


8  CONTENTS. 

C  H  AFTER    IX. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  ATTEMPTS  TO  MAKE  OUT  A  TIUAL  BALANCE.     102 

CHAPTER    X. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  is  PERPLEXED  ABOUT  CERTAIN  INVOICES.     113 

CHAPTER    XI. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  TAKES    CHARGE. OF   MRS.  WHIPPLETON'S 

EARTHLY  TREASURE 124 

CHAPTER    XII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  VISITS  THE  HOUSE  OF  MR.  COLLINGSBY, 

AND    SEES    MlSS    MARIAN 135 

CHAPTER    XIII. 

IN  \VHICH    PHIL   LOOKS    INTO    THE    OPERATIONS    OF   THE 

JUNIOR  PARTNER 146 

CHAPTER    XIV. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  MEETS  WITH  A  SERIOUS  CATASTROPHE.   .     158 

CHAPTER    XV. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  GOES   TO   WTORK  IN  THE   COOK-ROOM  OF 

THE  MARIAN 170 

CHAPTER    XVI. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  PROMISES  NOT  TO  DESERT  Miss  COLLINGSBY.     182 

CHAPTER    XVII. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  PUTS  A  CHECK   ON  THE   OPERATIONS   OF 

MR.  BEN  WATERFORD 194 

CHAPTEPt    XVIII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  PROTESTS  WITH  THE  BOAT-HOOK,  BUT  is 

PROTESTED.  .        .       .  205 


CONTENTS.  9 

CHAPTER    XIX. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  PROFITS  BY  CIRCUMSTANCES,  AND  WEIGHS 

ANCHOR  IN  THE  MARIAN 218 

CHAPTER    XX. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  SAILS  THE  MARIAN  ACROSS  LAKE  MICHIGAN.     229 

CHAPTER    XXI. 
IN    WHICH   PHIL   ANSWERS    SOME    INQUIRIES    ABOUT   THE 

PAWN,  AND  OTHER  MATTERS 241 

CHAPTER    XXII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  is  BEWILDERED,  AND  THE  MARIAN  SAILS 

FOR  CHICAGO 252 

CHAPTER    XXIII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL,  IN  THE  MARIAN,  GETS  THE  WEATHER-GAGE 

OF  THE  FLORINA 264 

CHAPTER    XXIV. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  GOES  TO  SLEEP,  AND  HIS   SEVEREST  CA 
TASTROPHE  COMES 275 

CHAPTER    XXV. 
IN  WHICH    PHIL    SUFFERS    MUCH    PAIN,    AND    MARIAN   is 

VERY    RESOLUTE 287 

CHAPTER    XXVI. 

IN    WHICH     PlIIL     FINDS     THE     TABLES     TURNED,     AND    THE 

MARIAN  RUNS  INTO  CHICAGO  RIVER 298 

CHAPTER    XXVII. 
IN  WHICH  PHIL  VISITS  MR.  COLLINGSBY  AGAIN,  AND  is  A 

HERO  IN  SPITE  OF  HIMSELF 309 

CHAPTER    XXVIII. 
IN    WHICH    PHIL    MORALIZES    UPON    WORLDLY    WISDOM, 

AND  BIDS  FAREWELL  TO  DESK  AND  DEBIT.      ...     321 


DESK  AND  DEBIT; 

OR, 

THE   CATASTROPHES   OF  A   CLERK. 


CHAPTER  I. 

IN  WHICH   PHIL    HAS   A   TALK   WITH    HIS   FATHER, 
AND    REVIEWS    HIS    PAST    HISTORY. 

«  "T  MUST   go  to   Chicago,  father,"   said  I,  one 

I  evening,  after  we  had  been  discussing  our 
domestic  relations  with  more  than  usual  earnest 
ness. 

"Why  go  to  Chicago,  Philip?  What  put  that 
idea  into  your  head  ? "  replied  my  father,  with 
a  kind  of  deprecatory  smile. 

"  I  don't  feel  as  though  I  could  live  any  longer 
in  this  state  of  doubt  and  uncertainty." 

"  Really,  Philip,  I  don't  think  you  need  worry 
yourself  to  that  extent." 

"  I  can't  help  it.     I  want  to  know  whether  my 


12  DESK    AND   DEBIT,    OR 

mother  is  alive  or  dead.  She  may  have  been  in 
her  grave  for  a  year  for  aught  we  know." 

"  Not  so  bad  as  that,  Philip.  I  am  sure  if  any 
thing  had  happened  to  her,  we  should  have  heard 
of  it,"  added  my  father,  mildly ;  but  I  saw  that 
he  had  more  feeling  on  the  subject  than  he  chose 
to  manifest. 

"  It  seems  to  me  inhuman  and  unnatural  to 
live  in  this  way,"  I  persisted,  perhaps  a  little 
more  impatiently  than  I  ought  to  have  spoken. 

"  It  is  all  my  fault,  my  son,"  said  my  father, 
meekly. 

"I   don't  think   so." 

"  Don't  compel  me  to  review  the  bitter  expe 
rience  of  the  past.  You  know  it  all." 

"  I   don't  mean  to  blame   you,   father." 

"  Certainly  it  is  not  your  mother's  fault  that 
an  ocean  rolls  between  her  and  me." 

"  I  am  willing  to  allow  that  it  is  your  fault, 
and  mine  too,  in  a  sense  different  from  what  you 
meant,  that  our  family  is  still  separated." 

I  perceived  that  my  father  was  considerably 
affected  by  what  I  had  said ;  and  as  he  relapsed 
into  silence,  apparently  to  give  vent  to  the  emo 
tions  which  disturbed  him,  I  did  not  press  the  sub- 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  I? 

ject  any  further  at  that  moment.  But  I  felt  all  that 
I  had  said,  and  I  thought  something  ought  to  be 
done.  I  was  thoroughly  in  earnest,  and  I  felt 
that  it  would  be  my  fault  if  our  little  family 
continued  to  be  separated  for  a  much  longer 
period. 

I  was  nearly  sixteen  years  old  j  and  into  that 
brief  space  had  been  crowded  a  strange  and  varied 
experience.  In  order  that  my  readers  may  know 
precisely  my  relations  to  the  rest  of  the  world, 
and  understand  why  I  was  so  deeply  moved,  I 
must  briefly  review  the  events  of  my  life.  I 
was  born  in  the  city  of  St.  Louis,  though  this  was 
a  fact  which  had  been  patent  to  me  only  a  couple 
of  years.  I  had  attained  unto  that  worldly  wis 
dom  which  enabled  me  to  know  who  my  father 
was ;  but  I  was  less  fortunate  in  regard  to  my 
mother,  whom  I  could  not  remember  that  I  had 
ever  seen,  though  it  was  a  comfort  for  me  to 
know  that  my  baby  eyes  had  gazed  into  her 
loving  face. 

In  the  burning  of  the  steamer  Farringford,  on 
the  upper  Missouri,  in  which  my  father  and 
mother  and  myself — then  a  child  two  years  old 
—  were  passengers,  I  had  been  committed  to  a 


14 

raft  formed  of  a  state-room  door,  and  bolstered 
with  pillows  to  keep  me  from  rolling  off.  By  an 
accident  this  frail  craft  was  carried  away  from 
the  burning  steamer,  then  aground,  and  I  was  sep 
arated  from  my  father,  who,  I  grieve  to  say, 
was  intoxicated  at  the  time,  and  unable  to  do 
all  that  he  would  have  accomplished  in  his  sober 
senses.  At  this  moment  the  steamer  broke  from 
the  shore,  and  was  carried  swiftly  down  the 
mighty  river.  Parents  were  thus  separated  from 
the  helpless  child. 

But  it  was  not  ordered  that  this  little  one 
should  perish  in  the  cold  waters  of  the  great 
river  in  the  night  and  the  gloom.  An  old  pio 
neer,  trapper,  and  hunter,  Matt  Rockwood,  had 
picked  me  up,  and  for  years  had  nursed  me  and 
cared  for  me  in  his  rude  log  cabin,  loving  me 
devotedly,  and  watching  over  me  with  a  woman's 
tenderness.  For  eleven  years  I  remained  in  the 
field  and  forest,  hardened  by  the  rude  life  of 
the  pioneer,  working  hard,  and  winning  a  large 
experience  in  dealing  with  the  elements  around 
me.  A  well-educated  and  refined  gentleman, 
driven  from  the  haunts  of  civilization  by  a  fancied 
wrong,  became  our  neighbor,  and  was  my  in- 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  15 

struetor,  so  that  I  obtained  more  than  a  com 
mon  school  education  from  him.  By  the  seeming 
guidings  of  Providence,  his  wife  and  daugh 
ter  were  sent  to  him  in  the  wilderness,  and  re 
mained  there  through  the  season. 

My  foster-father  was  killed  in  an  affray  with 
the  Indians.  Boy  as  I  was,  I  went  through  a 
brief  campaign  with  the  savages,  and  my  own 
rifle  had  more  than  once  brought  down  the 
treacherous  foe.  1  had  faced  danger  and  death, 
and  I  had  rescued  the  daughter  of  my  ex 
cellent  friend  and  instructor,  Mr.  Gracewood, 
from  the  Indians.  Ella  was  then,  and  is  now, 
one  of  my  best  friends.  In  the  autumn,  leav 
ing  the  farm  and  stock  to  Kit  Cruncher,  an  old 
hunter  who  had  been  our  friend  and  neighbor 
for  years,  I  started  for  the  realms  of  civiliza 
tion  with  Mr.  Gracewood  and  his  family,  tak 
ing  with  me  the  articles  found  upon  me  by 
the  old  pioneer  when  I  was  rescued  from  the 
river. 

I  had  fifteen  hundred  dollars  in  cash,  after  I 
had  paid  my  fare  to  St.  Louis  —  the  worldly 
wealth  of  my  deceased  foster-father.  On  the  way 
down  I  was  separated  from  my  friends  by  an  ao 


16 


cident,  and  did  not  see  them  again  for  several 
weeks.  But  I  found  a  place  in  the  city  to  learn 
the  carpenter's  trade,  in  which  I  had  already  made 
considerable  proficiency.  I  received  six  dollars 
a  week  for  my  work  when  it  was  found  that  I 
was  both  able  and  willing  to  do  nearly  as  much 
as  an  ordinary  journeyman. 

By  a  succession  of  rather  singular  incidents, 
I  discovered  that  a  dissolute,  drunken  man  about 
town  was  my  father  —  which  I  regarded  at  the 
time  as  the  greatest  mishap  that  could  possibly 
befall  me.  But  I  took  him  to  my  boarding-house, 
where  good  —  I  might  even  say  blessed  —  Mrs. 
Greenough  took  care  of  him,  giving  to  his  body 
the  nursing  he  needed,  and  to  his  spiritual  wants 
the  gospel  of  Jesus  Christ.  What  my  poor  father, 
who  had  become  the  moral  and  physical  wreck 
of  what  he  had  been  before,  could  not  do  of 
his  own  strength,  he  did  with  the  grace  and 
by  the  help  of  God  —  he  abandoned  his  cups,  and 
became  a  sober,  moral,  and  religious  man.  He 
attended  every  service  at  the  Methodist  church, 
into  whose  fold  Mrs.  Greenough  had  led  him, 
and  where,  for  two  years,  he  had  been  a  faith 
ful,  consistent,  and  useful  member. 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A   CLERK.  17 

He  was  employed  as  the  agent  of  a  very 
wealthy  southern  planter,  who  had  large  pos 
sessions  in  St.  Louis.  He  had  the  care  of  prop 
erty  worth  hundreds  of  thousands,  and  received 
and  disbursed  large  sums  in  rents,  repairs,  and 
building.  He  had  a  salary  of  twenty-four  hun 
dred  dollars  a  year,  more  than  half  of  which  he 
saved,  for  we  continued  to  live  at  the  humble 
abode  of  Mrs.  Greenough  after  the  dawn  of  our 
prosperity.  I  had  saved  nearly  all  my  wages, 
and  at  the  opening  of  my  story  I  was  worth, 
in  my  own  right,  about  two  thousand  dollars, 
with  which,  however,  I  did  not  purpose  to  meddle. 

Through  all  my  mishaps  I  had  reached  the 
flood  tide  of  prosperity.  There  was  only  one 
thing  in  the  wide  world  that  disturbed  me ;  and 
that,  at  last,  almost  became  a  burden  to  me.  I 
had  a  mother  whom  I  had  never  seen  within 
my  remembrance.  She  was  a  beautiful  woman, 
as  her  miniature  in  my  possession  fully  testified, 
as  well  as  those  who  had  known  her.  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby,  her  father,  had  three  children,  of  whom 
my  mother  was  the  youngest.  He  was  a  wealthy 
man,  and  formerly  a  resident  of  St.  Louis,  from 
which  he  had  removed,  partly  on  account  of  his 
2 


18  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

business,  and  partly  it  was  said,  to  avoid  the  im 
portunities  of  my  father,  who  made  himself  very 
disagreeable  in  his  inebriation.  He  was  largely 
engaged  in  railroad  and  other  business  enter 
prises.  My  mother  was  travelling  in  Europe,  with 
her  brother,  and  was  not  expected  to  return  for 
several  years. 

That  which  had  become  a  burden  to  me  was 
the  desire  to  see  my  mother,  with  the  added 
longing  to  have  our  little  family  reunited.  There 
was  no  good  reason  why  we  should  longer  be 
separated.  My  father  was  a  steady,  industrious, 
Christian  man,  who  had  repented  in  sackcloth 
and  ashes  the  errors  of  his  lifetime.  He  had 
written  to  Mr.  Collingsby  several  times,  but  no 
notice  had  ever  been  taken  of  his  appeals.  In 
vain  he  assured  the  father  of  his  injured  wife 
that  he  was  an  altered  man ;  that  he  drank  no 
liquor  or  anything  that  could  intoxicate ;  that 
he  was  a  member  in  good  standing  of  the  Meth 
odist  church,  and  that  he  was  receiving  a  hand 
some  salary.  Equally  vain  was  the  appeal  for 
his  son,  whose  existence  seemed  to  be  doubted, 
and  was  practically  denied. 

My  mother,  being  beyond  the  ocean,  could  not 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A    CLERK.  19 

be  a  party  to  this  cold  and  inhuman  silence,  as 
it  seemed  to  me.  We  were  assured  by  those 
who  had  seen  my  grandfather  that  he  was  aware 
of  the  facts  that  were  known  to  our  friends  in 
St.  Louis.  Mr.  Larnar,  whose  acquaintance  I  had 
made  in  the  midst  of  my  mishaps,  had  seen  Mr. 
Collingsby,  and  told  him  the  whole  story.  The 
rich  man  laughed  at  it,  and  declared  that  it  was 
a  trick ;  that,  if  he  was  a  poor  man,  Farringford 
would  not  trouble  him.  After  this  revelation  my 
father  refused  to  write  again.  He  was  sorely 
grieved  and  troubled,  but  he  still  had  a  sense 
of  self-respect  which  would  not  permit  him  to 
grovel  in  the  dust  before  any  man. 

I  had  worked  at  my  trade  two  years  in  St. 
Louis,  and  considered  myself  competent  to  do 
all  ordinary  work  in  that  line.  But  I  worked 
very  hard,  for  I  was  ambitious  to  do  as  much  as 
a  man.  I  was  growing,  and  while  I  increased 
in  height,  I  lost  flesh,  arid  was  lighter  in  weight 
than  when  I  had  left  the  field  and  forest.  My 
father  thought  I  was  working  too  hard,  and  Mrs. 
Greenough  seconded  the  argument  with  all  the 
force  of  a  woman's  influence.  Still  I  think  I 
should  not  have  given  up  my  trade  then  if  my 


20  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

employer  had  not  changed  his  business,  thus  com 
pelling  me  to  seek  a  new  situation.  I  had  been 
studying  book-keeping  for  two  years,  using  all 
my  evenings  in  this  and  other  studies.  I  prac 
tised  it  with  my  father,  who  was  an  accomplished 
accountant,  until  he  declared  that  I  was  competent 
to  keep  any  set  of  books,  either  of  a  merchant 
or  a  corporation. 

Mr.  Clinch,  my  late  employer,  closed  up  his 
affairs  at  the  opening  of  a  new  year.  I  could 
find  nothing  to  do  in  the  winter ;  but  when  I 
fretted  over  my  inactivity,  my  father  told  me 
to  improve  my  handwriting,  which,  as  a  carpen 
ter,  had  been  rather  stiff.  I  took  lessons  of  him, 
and  as  he  was  a  practical  business  man,  I  es 
caped  the  vicious  habit  of  flourishing  in  my 
writing.  He  insisted  that  I  should  write  a  plain, 
simple,  round  hand,  which  I  did.  As  my  fingers 
became  limber,  I  made  excellent  progress,  and  I 
was  really  proud  of  my  penmanship. 

These  comparatively  idle  days  were  full  of 
thought,  almost  all  of  which  related  to  my  mother. 
I  had  made  up  my  mind  that  something  ought 
to  be  done  to  find  her,  and  inform  her  of  the 
altered  circumstances  of  her  husband.  I  was  sure, 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OP   A   CLERK.  21 

after  reading  so  often  the  gentle  expression  of 
her  countenance  in  the  picture  I  had,  that  she 
would  make  us  glad  as  soon  as  she  was  assured 
of  the  reformation  of  the  wanderer.  I  meant  to  do 
something  now,  even  if  I  had  to  spend  my  two  thou 
sand  dollars  in  making  a  voyage  to  Europe  to 
search  for  her.  Her  father  refused  to  do  anything, 
and  it  was  necessary  for  us  to  act  in  our  own 
behalf.  It  was  not  the  rich  man's  money,  as  he 
averred,  that  we  sought,  but  only  the  calm  bliss 
of  domestic  happiness,  which  I  knew  would  come 
from  our  reunited  family. 


22  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 


CHAPTER  II. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL    STARTS    FOR   CHICAGO,   AND   HEARS  A 
FAMILIAR   NAME. 

MY  father  was  gloomy  and  sad,  and  I  disliked 
to  say  anything  more  on  the  painful  topic ; 
but  I  was  so  thoroughly  in  earnest  that  I  could 
not  postpone  some  decided  action.  It  seemed 
criminal  to  permit  such  a  matter  to  rest  any 
longer,  and  I  wondered  how  I  had  been  able  to 
keep  quiet  two  years  with  the  consciousness  that 
I  had  a  mother  whom  I  had  seen  only  with  my 
baby  eyes.  Something  seemed  to  reproach  me 
for  my  coldness  and  neglect,  though  in  fact  I  had 
done  all  I  could  to  solve  the  difficulty.  My  grand 
father  appeared  to  be  suspicious,  and  even  heart 
less  ;  but  I  knew  that  my  mother  was  not  so. 

Far  away  she  was  wandering  in  foreign  lands, 
and  though  surrounded  by  the  gayest  of  friends, 
and  surfeited  in  luxury,  I  could  not  help  thinking 
that  now  and  then,  in  the  still  watches  of  the 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A   CLERK.  23 

night,  her  motherly  heart  recurred  to  the  little 
one  she  had  lost.  What  a  joy  it  would  be  to  her 
to  know  that  her  son,  her  lost  one,  was  still  alive  ! 
If  in  her  maternal  heart  she  had  ever  pictured  that 
babe  as  becoming  a  stalwart  young  man,  I  felt  that 
I  could  already  realize  her  hope.  If  she  had  ever 
anticipated  the  time  when  her  first-born,  as  his 
beard  began  to  grow,  would  lavish  upon  her  all 
the  tenderness  which  a  mother  has  a  right  to 
claim,  I  felt  that  I  could  amply  reward  her  desire, 
and  realize  her  ambition. 

My  father  was  silent.  I  knew  he  was  consider 
ing  what  more  he  could  do  to  gratify  the  longings 
of  my  soul.  Perhaps  he  was  weighing  my  prop 
osition  to  go  to  Chicago,  and  speak  for  myself  and 
for  him.  I  could  not  say  that  my  plan  was  the 
best,  or  that  any  good  would  come  of  it;  and  I 
mentioned  it  because  I  could  think  of  nothing 
else  that  looked  like  decided  action.  I  glanced 
at  him,  and  he  saw  that  I  was  desirous  of  resum 
ing  the  topic. 

"  Philip,  it  is  my  fault  that  I  am  separated  from 
your  mother,  and  your  words  sound  like  so  many 
reproaches  to  me,"  said  he,  with  emotion.  "  But 
I  deserve  it  all,  for  though  I  feel  that  God  has 


24  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

forgiven  me,  he  will  not  spare  me  from  all  the 
consequences  of  my  folly  and  sin." 

"  Do  not  say  that,  father.  Far  be  it  from  me  to 
utter  a  reproach  for  anything  you  have  done,"  I 
replied,  disturbed  by  his  words  and  his  manner. 
"  Let  the  past  go  —  <  let  the  dead  bury  their 
dead.'  " 

"  But  the  dead  will  not  bury  their  dead,  Philip. 
Your  mother  left  me  when  she  could  no  longer 
live  with  me.  I  do  not  blame  her.  It  was  my 
fault  alone." 

"  I  only  wish  to  let  my  mother  know  what  has 
happened ;  that  you  are  now  a  good  and  true  man. 
I  am  sure,  if  she  knew  this,  she  would  hasten  to 
us  without  a  single  day's  delay." 

"  Of  course  she  is  under  the  influence  of  her 
father  and  her  brothers.  I  do  not  even  know 
where  she  is.  If  I  did  I  would  write  to  her. 
She  will  return  one  of  these  days,  and  then  I  will 
try  to  see  her." 

"  It  may  be  years  before  she  returns,  father. 
They  say  it  will  be  three  years  at  least." 

"  What  can  we  do  ?  " 

"  I  will  go  to  Chicago." 

"  What  good  can  that  possibly  do  ?     Will  you 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  25 

force  yourself  into  the  presence  of  your  grand 
father,  and  then  tell  him  that  you  are  the  son  of 
his  daughter?  He  would  not  believe  you;  he 
would  kick  you  out  of  his  house." 

"  I  shall  not  be  rash  or  indiscreet." 

"  But  what  will  you  do?  What  can  you  do?" 
demanded  my  father,  earnestly. 

"  I  don't  know ;  that  will  depend  upon  circum 
stances.  In  spite  of  my  mishaps,  fortune  has 
favored  me  in  the  long  run,"  I  replied ;  but  I 
had  no  plan  whatever  for  my  future  action. 

"  You  do  not  know  your  grandfather." 

"  I  never  even  saw  him." 

"  He  is  not  a  bad  man,  by  any  means ;  on  the 
contrary,  he  is  upright  and  liberal.  But  he  is 
eminently  solid  and  practical.  He  is  old-fashioned, 
full  of  dignity  and  self-respect.  He  believes  that 
the  world  and  all  the  affairs  of  mankind  move  in 
deep-worn  ruts.  He  follows  only  legitimate  and 
recognized  channels.  He  rejects  anything  that 
is  strange  and  out  of  the  common  course,  and  for 
that  reason  your  story  would  find  no  favor  with 
him.  I  doubt  whether  he  ever  read  a  novel  in 
his  life.  If  you  should  take  all  the  public  officers 
in  St.  Louis  to  Chicago  with  you,  and  let  them 


26  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

swear  in  court  that  you  were  the  long-lost  son  of 
Edward  and  Louise  Farringford,  he  would  not  be 
lieve  them.  He  may  be  convinced,  but  not  by 
anything  you  can  say  or  do." 

"  Nevertheless,  father,  I  wish  to  go  to  Chicago. 
I  have  seen  but  little  of  the  world,  and  I  have 
heard  a  great  deal  about  that  city." 

"  I  have  no  objection  to  your  going  to  Chicago 
—  not  the  least;  but  I  hope  you  will  not  flatter 
yourself  that  you  can  produce  an  impression  upon 
the  mind  of  Mr.  Collingsby,  or  his  son  Richard, 
who  is  as  near  like  his  father  as  one  pea  is  like 
another  pea.  I  should  even  like  to  have  you 
travel  for  two  or  three  months.  It  would  do  you 
good.  You  might  go  east  —  to  New  York  and 
Philadelphia." 

"  I  don't  care  about  going  farther  than  Chi 
cago." 

"  Go,  by  all  means ;  but  don't  get  into  a  quarrel 
with  your  grandfather." 

':  I'm  not  quarrelsome,  father." 

"  But  Mr.  Collingsby  would  be  if  you  went  to 
him  with  your  story,  though  every  word  of  it  is 
true." 

And    so    it   was   settled   that   I   should   go   to 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OP   A   CLERK.  27 

Chicago.  I  intended  at  least  to  find  out  who  and 
what  my  grandfather  was.  I  wanted  to  see  him 
with  my  own  eyes,  though  he  was  evidently  what 
is  regarded  as  "  a  hard  customer."  The  fact  that 
he  was  so  afforded  me  a  new  sensation,  and  I  be 
gan  to  glow  with  an  unwonted  excitement.  It 
was  my  mission  to  see  and  convince  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby  that  I  was  his  grandson,  unless  he  should 
be  able  to  prove  that  I  was  not  so ;  and  one  can 
not  reasonably  be  required  to  prove  a  negative. 
It  was  a  problem,  a  difficulty  ;  and  I  felt,  as  I  had 
in  the  field  and  forest,  a  new  life  and  vigor  when 
there  was  a  real  obstacle  to  be  overcome. 

My  father  was  certainly  very  considerate  to 
wards  me,  and  was  willing  to  trust  me  anywhere 
that  I  pleased  to  go.  I  had  not  many  prepara 
tions  to  make ;  a  small  valise  held  my  wardrobe, 
and  on  Monday  morning  I  crossed  the  river  and 
took  the  train  for  Chicago.  A  journey  of  two 
hundred  and  eighty  miles,  accomplished  in  about 
twelve  hours,  was  not  a  very  great  event,  even 
a  dozen  years  ago ;  but  somehow,  I  do  not  know 
why,  I  felt  as  though  I  was  setting  out  in  a  new 
career  of  existence.  1  expected  to  return  in  a 
week,  or  in  two  weeks,  at  the  most ;  yet,  in  spite 


28  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

of  my  exertion  to  make  myself  believe  that  the 
trip  was  quite  a  commonplace  affair,  it  continued 
to  thrust  itself  upon  me  as  one  of  great  im 
portance. 

I  had  taken  a  few  short  trips  with  my  father 
on  holidays  by  railroad,  so  that  a  train  of  cars 
was  not  quite  a  new  thing  to  me.  However,  I 
was  no  traveller  then,  and  being  of  an  inquiring 
mind,  I  was  disposed  to  examine  minutely  every 
thing  I  saw,  and  to  understand  the  use  of  every 
new  object.  I  bought  my  ticket,  and  stepping 
back,  I  amused  myself  in  watching  the  ticket- 
seller,  anxious  to  solve  the  mystery  of  a  stamp 
ing  machine  he  continually  used.  Before  I  had 
solved  the  problem  to  my  satisfaction,  I  heard 
the  bell  ring. 

"  All  aboard  for  Chicago  and  way  stations  !  " 
shouted  the  conductor. 

That  meant  me,  and  I  hastened  to  obey  the 
summons,  but  rather  vexed  that  I  had  not  pen 
etrated  the  working  of  the  stamping  machine. 
I  was  rather  late,  and  I  found  the  car  I  entered 
quite  full  •  indeed,  there  was  only  a  single  vacant 
seat,  and  that  was  by  the  side  of  an  old  woman 
whose  company  did  not  appear  to  be  particularly 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  29 

desirable.  However,  I  had  made  up  my  mind 
that  it  is  not  best  to  be  too  particular  in  this 
world,  and  I  walked  up  the  aisle  with  the  inten 
tion  of  taking  the  seat.  I  found  it  was  already 
appropriated  to  the  old  lady's  numerous  bundles. 

"  Is  this  seat  taken,  madam  ?  "  I  ventured  to 
ask. 

"Well,  yes;  don't  you  see  it's  taken?"  said 
she,  rather  sourly. 

"  I  don't  see  any  other  vacant  seat  in  the  car," 
I  added. 

"  I  can't  move  all  them  things/'  snapped  the 
matron. 

"  I  will  place  them  in  the  rack  above  your 
head,"  I  suggested. 

li  I've  fixed  'em  all  once,  and  I  don't  want  to 
move  'em  agin.  You  are  a  young  feller,  and  you 
can  find  a  seat  in  some  other  car,"  added  the 
old  lady,  very  decidedly. 

Some  of  the  passengers  laughed  at  the  answers 
of  the  old  lady.  I  did  not  care  to  get  up  a 
quarrel  with  her,  and  I  decided  to  stand  up,  in 
deference  to  the  old  lady's  bundles,  until  the 
train  stopped  at  the  first  station,  when  I  could 
safely  look  for  a  seat  in  some  other  car.  After 


30  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

this  exhibition  of  rudeness,  I  did  not  think  my 
seat  at  her  side  would  be  comfortable ;  I  was 
afraid  her  bristles  would  annoy  me,  and  it  was 
more  comfortable  to  stand.  The  train  moved 
off;  but  it  had  gone  only  a  very  short  distance 
before  the  conductor  appeared,  followed  by  a 
very  dignified-looking  gentleman,  for  whom  he 
was  evidently  seeking  a  seat;  and  this  assured 
me  that  the  cars  were  all  full  forward. 

"  Here  is  just  one  seat,"  said  the  gentlemanly 
conductor,  as  he  stopped  beside  the  vacant 
place,  and  began  to  pick  up  the  old  lady's 
bundles. 

"  Don't  you  tech  them  things,"  interposed  their 
legal  owner. 

"  This  gentleman  wants  a  seat,"  added  the 
polite  official. 

"  He  can  find  one  somewhere  else.  I  don't 
want  my  bundles  tipped  round,  as  though  they 
didn't  cost  nothing." 

"  But  we  must  have  the  seat,  madam,"  insisted 
the  conductor.  "  I  believe  you  pay  for  only  one 
seat." 

"  Sakes  alive  !  Can't  a  body  have  a  place  to 
put  her  things?" 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  31 

"I  will  put  them  in  the  rack  for  you." 

"  I  don't  want  them  put  in  the  rack." 

"  Well,  madam,  you  can  put  them  where  you 
please,  but  this  gentleman  must  have  the  seat." 

"  I  don't  think  much  of  them  gentlemen  that 
want  to  go  a  pestering  a  poor  lone  woman  like 
me.  You  let  them  things  alone,  sir  ! "  snapped 
the  old  lady. 

"  I  will  wait  a  reasonable  time  for  you  to  dis 
pose  of  them ;  but  if  you  don't  take  care  of  them, 
I  shall  put  them  in  the  baggage-car." 

"  I  should  like  to  see  you  do  it !  Hain't  you 
got  nothin*  better  to  do  than  tormenting  an 
unprotected  woman  ?  " 

Finding  that  he  had  a  hard  subject  to  deal 
with,  the  gentlemanly  conductor  packed  up  the 
bundles,  and  tossed  them  into  the  rack,  heedless 
of  the  protest  of  the  indignant  owner.  I  con- 
jfc&s  that  I  rather  enjoyed  the  discomfiture  of  the 
old  lady,  who  had  compelled  me  to  stand  for  the 
accommodation  of  her  bundles.  She  was  unrea 
sonable,  and  utterly  selfish,  and  I  thought  she 
deserved  the  defeat  to  which  she  was  compelled 
to  submit. 

"  Here  is  a  seat  for  you,  Mr.  Collingsby,"  con- 


32 

tiiiued  the  conductor,  with  a  great  deal  of  def 
erence  in  his  tone  and  manner. 

Mr.  Collingsby !  I  straightway  forgot  all  about 
the  old  lady  in  the  interest  awakened  by  this 
name.  The  snaps,  snarls,  and  growls  with  which 
the  woman  saluted  her  new  seat-mate  were  lost 
upon  me,  whether  they  were  or  not  upon  the 
unfortunate  subject  of  them.  The  name  was 
not  a  very  common  one,  and  I  jumped  to  the 
conclusion  that  the  dignified  gentleman  was  my 
uncle. 

"  Thank  you,"  replied  the  traveller,  rather 
coldly,  after  the  hard  battle  the  official  had 
fought  for  his  sake. 

"  There  will  be  plenty  of  seats  when  we  reach 
the  next  station,"  added  the  conductor,  as  he 
passed  me. 

For  my  own  part,  1  was  glad  I  had  no  seat, 
for  I  could  now  choose  my  own  position  to  study 
the  features  of  Mr.  Collingsby. 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OP   A    CLERK.  33 


CHAPTER   III. 

IN  WHICH    PHIL    MAKES    THE    ACQUAINTANCE    OF   MRS. 
WHIPPLETON. 

MR.  COLLINGSBY,  though  not  more  than 
forty-two  or  three  years  old,  was  quite 
stout ;  indeed,  I  should  say  that  he  was  already 
qualified  by  his  proportions  to  be  an  alderman.  I 
was  disposed  to  regard  him  with  great  respect,  as 
he  was  my  uncle  —  at  least  I  had  made  up  my 
mind  that  he  was.  I  certainly  had  no  objection  to 
acknowledging  such  a  relation.  He  corresponded 
with  the  description  given  by  my  father, 

The  dignified  gentleman  took  up  a  fair  half  of 
the  seat  which  was  to  be  divided  between  him 
and  the  old  lady,  and  the  latter  wriggled,  and 
twisted,  and  squirmed  for  some  time  before  she 
had  adjusted  her  frame  and  her  dress  to  her  own 
satisfaction.  Mr.  Collingsby  took  no  notice  what 
ever  of  her,  as  it  was  evidently  beneath  his  dig 
nity  to  do  so,  or  even  to  be  annoyed  by  her  un- 
3 


34  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

easy  motions.  Opening  the  newspaper  lie  carried 
in  his  hand,  he  began  to  read  the  leader,  totally 
oblivious  of  her  presence.  I  rather  liked  his  way 
of  treating  a  disagreeable  subject ;  and  just  then, 
if  I  had  been  permitted  to  vote,  I  would  cheerful 
ly  have  cast  my  ballot  in  his  favor  for  an  alderman 
of  Chicago  or  St.  Louis. 

The  more  I  studied  the  face  of  my  presumed 
uncle,  the  better  I  liked  him,  though  perhaps  I 
was  biassed  by  the  relationship.  He  looked  like  a 
very  substantial  man,  though  I  should  have  re 
garded  it  as  dangerous  to  perpetrate  a  joke  upon 
him.  On  the  whole,  therefore,  I  was  entirely  sat 
isfied  to  have  him  turn  out  to  be  the  brother  of 
my  mother.  In  about  an  hour  the  train  stopped  ; 
and  by  this  time  I  was  ready  to  sit  down.  But 
only  one  gentleman  left  the  car  in  which  I  was 
riding ;  and  he  sat  directly  opposite  the  dignified 
gentleman.  I  started  for  the  vacant  seat;  but, 
before  I  could  secure  it,  Mr.  Collingsby  sprang 
quite  nimbly,  for  a  person  of  his  weight,  into  the 
place.  Doubtless  the  rudeness  of  the  old  lady 
had  annoyed  him,  for  he  made  haste  to  beat  a 
retreat. 

However,  I  had  the  alternative  of  taking  the 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A    CLERK.  35 

seat  just  vacated,  or  standing  UD  still  longer.  I 
chose  the  former ;  and  before  the  old  lady  could 
transfer  her  bundles  from  the  rack  to  the  chair,  I 
dropped  into  it.  I  made  myself  as  comfortable  as 
possible,  though  my  porcupine  companion  hitched 
violently  towards  the  middle  of  the  seat,  so  as  to 
make  sure  that  she  had  her  full  share  of  the  space. 
She  cast  a  savage  glance  at  me,  as  though  she 
thought  I  had  invaded  her  privileges  ;  but  I  en 
deavored  to  follow  the  example  of  my  predecessor 
in  the  seat,  and  be  too  dignified  to  be  annoyed. 

"  Goodness  knows !  I  am  glad  that  hog  has 
gone  ! "  ejaculated  the  old  lady,  with  no  little 
venom  in  her  tones,  and  loud  enough  to  have 
been  heard  by  Mr.  Collingsby,  if  his  dignity  had 
not  closed  his  ears  to  such  an  uriferninine  expres- 
sion. 

I  did  not  deem  it  prudent  to  take  any  notice  of 
her ;  and,  across  the  aisle,  I  read  the  headings  in 
large  type  in  Mr.  Collingsby's  newspaper,  for  I 
had  none  of  my  own  to  help  me  in  preserving  my 
dignity,  or  rather  in  cultivating  it. 

"  Some  folks  don't  know  much,"  added  the  old 
lady,  spitefully. 

I  was  perfectly  willing  to  grant  the  truth  of 


36  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

this  proposition,  even  without  knowing  whether 
it  was  intended  to  apply  to  Mr.  Collingsby  or  to 
me ;  though  I  was  compelled  to  believe  it  was  all 
in  the  family,  and  made  no  difference.  It  was 
undeniable  that  "  some  folks  didn't  know  much ;  " 
but  I  was  forced  to  deduce  the  corollary  that  the 
old  lady  was  one  of  the  unfortunates  included  in 
the  proposition. 

"  I  say,  some  folks  don't  know  much,"  repeated 
the  old  lady,  forcibly.  "That  Mr.  Collingsby 
needn't  put  on  airs,  and  pretend  he  don't  know 
me.  I  know'd  him  the  moment  that  conductor- 
man  spoke  his  name.  He  ain't  no  better'n  I  am. 
My  son's  his  pardner  in  business." 

I  couldn't  help  looking  at  her  then.  Her  lips 
were  pursed  up,  and  she  was  the  very  impersona 
tion  of  offended  dignity.  Her  remark  rather  star 
tled  me,  and  if  it  was  true,  I  wished  to  make  her 
acquaintance. 

"  Perhaps  he  didn't  recognize  you,"  I  ventured 
to  suggest. 

"Perhaps  he  didn't;  but  none  are  so  blind  as 
them  that  won't  see.  Yes,  that  man  is  my  son's 
pardner  in  business  ;  and  my  son  is  every  bit  and 
grain  as  good  as  he  is,  though  I  say  it,  who  ought 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  37 

not  to  say  it.  My  name's  Wh'ppleton,  and  my 
son's  name  is  Charles  Whippleton.  I  s'pose  you've 
heard  of  the  firm  of  Collingsby  and  Whippleton  — 
hain't  you  ?  " 

"  I  never  did/'  I  replied. 

Mr.  Collingsby  read  his  newspaper,  and  did  not 
appear  to  hear  a  word  that  was  said ;  but  I  fan 
cied  his  dignity  was  subjected  to  a  severe  trial. 

"  Where  have  you  been  all  your  life,  if  you 
never  heard  of  Collingsby  and  Whippleton,  the 
biggest  lumber  firm  in  Chicago  ?  "  added  the  old 
lady. 

"  I  never  was  in  Chicago,"  I  replied. 

"  0,  you  never  was  !  Well,  it's  a  sight  to  see  ! 
You  hain't  seen  much  of  the  world  if  you  never 
was  in  Chicago.  Well,  you  are  like  a  chicken 
that  ain't  hatched  ;  all  your  troubles  are  to  come. 
There's  a  great  many  mean  folks  in  the  world ; 
you'll  find  that  out  soon  enough.  For  my  part,  if 
there's  anything  in  this  world  that  I  hate,  it's 
mean  folks,"  continued  Mrs.  Whippleton,  glancing 
maliciously  across  the  aisle  at  Mr.  Collingsby. 
"  That  man's  meaner'n  gravel-stone  chowder." 

The  old  lady  dropped  her  voice  a  little,  as 
though  she  meant  to  be  confidential  on  this  point. 


38  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OK 

I  was  rather  sorry  to  have  the  character  of  my 
presumed  uncle  damaged  in  this  manner,  but  I 
was  not  sufficiently  acquainted  with  him  to  at 
tempt  a  defence. 

"It  was  meaner'n  dirt  for  him  to  set  down 
side  of  me,  and  not  even  say  how  d'ye  do  !  I 
hate  mean  folks.  I  ain't  mean  myself.  There 
ain't  a  mean  bone  in  my  body  —  no,  there  ain't, 
if  I  do  say  it,  that  oughtn't  to  say  it." 

"  Probably  the  gentleman  did  not  recognize 
you,"  I  suggested  again. 

"  He  didn't  want  to  rz-cog-mze  me,"  she  per 
sisted,  throwing  a  bitter  emphasis  on  the  middle 
of  the  word.  "  He  didn't  even  look  at  me." 

I  wanted  to  ask  her  some  questions  about  the 
Collingsby  family ;  but  I  did  not  like  to  do  so 
while  one  of  its  members  was  so  near  me,  for  I 
fancied  that,  deeply  as  he  was  absorbed  in  the 
newspaper,  he  heard  every  word  that  was  said  by 
the  garrulous  old  lady,  who  appeared  to  have  been 
talking  more  for  his  benefit  than  mine  in  some  of 
her  remarks.  But  the  appearance  of  the  conduct 
or  at  the  forward  end  of  the  car,  taking  up  the 
tickets,  changed  the  current  of  her  thoughts,  and 
she  commenced  a  violent  demonstration  upon  her 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A   CLERK.  39 

bag,  her  pocket,  and  her  bundles,  in  search  of  her 
ticket. 

Most  of  the  passengers  produced  their  tickets, 
conscious,  perhaps,  how  nervous  it  makes  the 
"  gentlemanly  conductor  "  when  compelled  to  wait 
for  excited  men  or  women  to  search  through  all 
their  pockets,  and  all  their  portable  effects,  for  the 
evidence  that  they  had  paid  their  fare.  I  noticed 
that  Mr.  Collingsby  continued  to  gaze  unmoved 
at  the  columns  of  his  newspaper,  arid  when  the 
conductor  reached  him,  he  slowly  drew  off  his  kid 
glove,  and  deliberately  took  from  his  pocket-book 
the  ticket,  which  his  dignity  did  not  permit  him 
to  have  ready  before. 

"  Tickets,  if  you  please,'''  said  the  conductor,  as 
he  politely  bowed  to  Mr.  Collingsby,  and  turned 
to  the  less  important  people  in  the  car. 

I  gave  up  mine,  and  received  a  check ;  but 
Mrs.  Whippleton  was  still  ransacking  her  bags 
and  parcels. 

"  As  I  live  and  breathe,  I've  lost  my  ticket,  or 
else  somebody's  stole  it ! "  exclaimed  the  old  lady, 
glancing  again  towards  Mr.  Collingsby,  who  must 
have  been,  in  her  estimation,  the  root  of  all  evil 
and  all  mischief. 


40 

"  Did  you  buy  one  ?  "  asked  the  conductor. 

"  Sartin  I  did,"  protested  Mrs.  Whippletoit ,• 
u  and  it  took  nigh  on  to  every  cent  of  money  1 
had.  I  hain't  got  enough  left  to  buy  my  din 
ner." 

"  Look  round  and  find  it,"  added  the  official. 

"  Look  round !  I've  looked  into  everything  I 
have.  You  hustled  all  my  things  over,  and  I 
reckon  it's  your  fault,  more'n  'tis  mine." 

"  Look  again,  and  I  will  come  back,"  added  the 
conductor,  as  he  passed  on  his  way. 

"You  hain't  seen  nothin'  of  my  ticket  —  have 
you  ?  "  said  Mrs.  Whippleton,  as  she  commenced 
another  onslaught  upon  her  pockets  and  bundles. 

"I  have  not." 

But  I  did  the  best  I  could  to  assist  her  in  the 
search.  I  got  out  of  my  seat,  and  looked  upon 
the  floor  in  the  vicinity.  Neither  of  us  was  suc 
cessful  in  finding  the  lost  pasteboard,  for  which 
the  handsome  sum  of  twelve  dollars  had  been 
expended.  I  really  pitied  the  old  lady,  for  she 
did  not  appear  to  be  in  good  circumstances  her 
self,  judging  by  the  quality  of  her  clothing  and 
her  baggage.  What  seemed  to  make  it  worse  to 
me  was  the  fact  that  she  had  spent  all  her  money. 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A   CLERK.  41 

"  I  don't  see  what's  become  on't !  "  said  she,  in 
despair. 

"  Are  you  sure  you  bought  one  ?  "  I  asked, 
rather  for  the  want  of  anything  else  to  say  than 
because  this  was  the  most  pertinent  question. 

"  Why,  do  you  think  I'd  lie  about  it  ?  " 

"  Certainly  not/'  I  protested,  alarmed  at  this 
violent  deduction  from  my  remark. 

"  If  I  didn't  buy  a  ticket,  where's  my  money 
gone  to?" 

"  You  may  have  lost  it  before  you  got  into 
the  car." 

"No,  I  didn't.  I  had  it,  I  know,  after  I  sot 
down  here.  You  don't  think  I'd  try  to  cheat  — 
do  you  ?  " 

"  Why,  no  !     I  didn't  think  of  such  a  thing." 

"Well,  madam,  have  you  found  your  ticket?" 
asked  the  conductor,  returning  from  the  rear  of 
the  car. 

"  Hain't  seen  hide  nor  hair  on't." 

"  Just  get  out  of  the  seat  and  shake  yourself. 
If  you  had  a  ticket  at  all,  it  is  here  somewhere," 
added  the  gentlemanly  official. 

"Do  you  think  I  didn't  have  no  ticket?"  de 
manded  Mrs.  Whippleton,  pursing  up  her  lips  to 
express  her  wounded  feelings. 


42  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

"  I  don't  know ;  jump  up,  and  we  will  see." 

I  left  my  seat,  and  with  a  labored  effort  the 
old  lady  followed  my  example.  The  conductor 
searched  on  the  floor,  and  in  the  chair,  over 
hauled  the  bundles,  and  turned  up  the  back  of 
the  seat,  but  with  no  better  success  than  had 
attended  our  previous  efforts. 

"  Sartin  'tain't  there,"  said  the  old  lady,  as  she 
worked  herself  into  her  seat  again. 

"  No,  it  is  not.  Are  you  sure  you  had  a 
ticket  ?  " 

"  Do  you  think  I'd  lie  about  it  ?  " 

"  Perhaps  you  lost  it  before  you  got  into  the 
car." 

"  No,  I  didn't.  I  had  it  while  I  sot  here.  I 
reckon  you  lost  it  when  you  stirred  up  my  things. 
If  you  hadn't  teched  ?em,  it  would  have  been  all 
right." 

"  Well,  madam,  I  want  your  ticket  or  your  fare." 

"But  I  hain't  got  no  ticket." 

"  Then  give  me  twelve  dollars." 

"  Twelve  dollars ! "  ejaculated  the  old  lady. 
"  Do  you  think  I'm  made  of  money  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know  that  I  care  what  you  are  made 
of,  if  you  pay  your  fare." 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A   CLERK.  43 

"  But  I've  spent  ail  my  money.  I  hain't  got 
twelve  dollars.  Besides,  I  don't  want  to  pay 
twice." 

"  If  you  find  your  ticket,  I  will  give  you  back 
your  money." 

"  I  tell  you  I  hain't  got  twelve  dollars.  You 
can't  hatch  wooden  eggs." 

"  Then  you  must  leave  the  car,  madam." 

"  Leave  the  car !  And  not  go  back  to  Chi 
cago  ?  " 

"  I  must  have  your  ticket  or  your  fare  before 
we  stop  next  time,"  said  the  conductor,  pass 
ing  on. 


44  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 


CHAPTER  IV. 

IN    WHICH    PHIL    IS    CHIVALROUS,    BUT    HAS    HIS    EYES 
OPENED. 

I  THOUGHT  that  the  conductor  was  rather 
hard  on  the  old  lady,  though  I  was  willing 
to  allow  that  his  duty  admitted  of  no  compro 
mise. 

"Did  you  ever  hear  the  like  on't?"  exclaimed 
the  old  lady.  "  Put  me  out  of  the  car  !  He's  a 
mean  man,  and  I  hate  mean  folks  wus'n  pizen." 

"  I  suppose  he  has  his  duty  to  perform/'  I 
mildly  suggested. 

"  'Tain't  his  duty  to  put  a  lone  and  onpro- 
tected  woman  out  of  the  car ;  and  he  wouldn't 
do  it  if  my  son  Charles  was  here." 

I  concluded  that  if  her  son  Charles  were 
there,  he  would  pay  her  fare,  like  a  dutiful  son 
as  he  was.  Presently  the  whistle  on  the  loco 
motive  sounded,  and  we  heard  the  scraping  of 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  45 

the  brakes,  as  the  train  prepared  to  stop.  The 
conductor  promptly  appeared,  and  again  demand 
ed  her  fare  or  a  ticket.  The  old  lady  seemed 
to  be  greatly  troubled,  and  I  expected  to  have 
the  whole  seat  to  myself  from  this  station. 

"  Suthin  must  be  done  !  "  said  the  old  lady. 

"  That's  so ;  give  me  your  ticket  or  the  twelve 
dollars,"  replied  the  official. 

"  I  can't  do  one  nor  t'other.  I  hain't  got  the 
money,  and  my  ticket's  gone." 

"  Very  well,  madam.  Then  you  must  leave 
the  train." 

"  But  I  don't  know  a  soul  here.  Won't  you 
trust  me  till  we  get  to  Chicago?" 

"  I  don't  know  you,  and  we  do  not  give 
credit  for  fares." 

"  Mr.  Collingsby,  over  there,  knows  me.  My 
son's  his  pardner  in  business." 

"  Very  well,  madam  ;  if  that  is  the  case,  there 
will  be  no  trouble  about  it,"  added  the  polite 
official,  as  he  turned  to  the  dignified  gentleman, 
and  stated  the  case. 

Mr.  Collingsby  glanced  at  the  old  lady,  and 
shook  his  head,  with  a  deprecatory  smile. 

"  I   have    not   the    pleasure   of    the    lady's   ac- 


46  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

quaintance/'  said  he,  after  a  hasty  glance  at 
her  face,  as  he  turned  his  attention  to  his  news 
paper  again. 

"  She  says  her  son  is  your  partner  in  busi 
ness,"  suggested  the  conductor. 

"  That  may  be  ;  but  I  don't  know  the  lady. 
1  am  not  aware  that  I  ever  saw  her,"  answered 
the  head  of  the  firm,  without  raising  his  eyes 
from  his  paper. 

"  What  is  your  name,  madam  ?  "  demanded  the 
conductor. 

"  Don't  he  know  my  name  ?  Don't  he  know 
the  name  of  his  own  pardner  ? " 

"  I  asked   your  name,  madam." 

"  My  name's  Whippleton  —  Mrs.  Whippleton  ; 
and  my  son's  his  pardner." 

"  She  says  her  name  is  Whippleton,  and  that 
her  son  is  your  partner,"  said  the  conductor, 
again  appealing  to  the  dignified  head  of  the  firm. 

11 1  don't  dispute  it,  sir,"  replied  Mr.  Collirigs- 
by,  coldly.  "  My  partner's  name  is  Whippleton, 
but  I  don't  know  that  lady.  As  I  said,  I  am 
not  aware  that  I  ever  saw  her  before." 

"  Shall  I  trust  her  for  her  fare  ?  " 

"  Do  as  you   please.     As  I   don't  know  her,  I 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A    CLERK,  47 

cannot  vouch  for  her,"  replied  Mr.  Collingsby, 
in  a  tone  which  implied  that,  if  the  conductor 
knew  what  he  was  about,  he  would  not  disturb 
him  any  further  on  the  disagreeable  subject. 

"  Mr.  Collingsby  does  not  know  you,  madam." 

"  That's  what  I  call  mean  ! "  ejaculated  Mrs. 
Whippleton,  bitterly.  "  I  don't  believe  he'd  know 
his  own  father  if  the  old  man  didn't  wear  a 
fashionable  hat." 

"  He  doesn't  dispute  what  you  say ;  but  he 
doesn't  know  you.  I  must  have  your  fare, 
madam." 

"  I  keep  telling  you,  I  hain't  got  no  money." 

"  Then  you  must  get  out  here." 

"  You  don't  mean   so  !  " 

"  Yes,  I  do.  Shall  I  help  you  out  with  your 
baggage  ?  " 

"  But  I'll  pay  you  when  I   get  to   Chicago." 

"  That  won't  do.  In  a  word,  madam,  I  don't 
believe  you  lost  your  ticket." 

"  Goodness  !     Do  you  think  I'd  lie  about  it  ? " 

"  I'm  sorry  to  say  I  do  think  so.  If  I  mis* 
take  not,  you  have  tried  this  game  on  before." 

"  What  imperance  !  " 

"  Come,  madam,  be  in  a  hurry  ! "  persisted  the 


48  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

conductor,  reaching  forward  and  taking  the  old 
lady's  largest  bundle  from  the  rack. 

"  I  should  like  to  speak  to  you  a  moment,  Mr. 
Conductor,"  I  interposed,  unable  any  longer  to 
contain  my  indignation. 

"  What  do  you   want  ?  " 

I  rose,  and  requested  him  to  go  with  me  to 
the  rear  of  the  car. 

"  Speak  quick,  young  man.  Do  you  know  this 
woman  ?  "  demanded  the  bustling  official. 

"  No  ;  but  I  will  be  responsible  for  her  fare," 
I  replied,  with  as  much  dignity  as  Mr.  Collings- 
by  could  have  assumed.  "  If  she  don't  pay  you 
when  we  get  to  Chicago,  I  will." 

"  Will  you,  indeed  !  That  is  very  kind  of 
you ;  but  we  don't  do  business  in  that  way," 
laughed  the  conductor,  with  a  glance  which 
indicated  how  much  he  pitied  my  greenness. 
"  She  has  money  enough,  and  she  didn't  buy 
any  ticket.  It  is  only  a  trick  to  get  rid  of  pay 
ing  her  fare." 

"  I  will  be   responsible   for   the   fare." 

"  Pay  it  now,  then,"  added  the  conductor, 
shrugging  his  shoulders. 

I  do  not  know  what  it  was  that  prompted  me 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  49 

to  this  chivalrous  action  in  favor  of  a  very  dis 
agreeable  old  lady ;  but  I  felt  like  a  Christian 
who  was  fighting  the  battle  of  his  enemy.  I 
took  out  my  porte-monnaie,  and  from  the  fifty- 
three  dollars  I  had  left  of  the  sum  I  had  taken 
to  pay  my  expenses,  I  gave  the  conductor 
twelve.  Pie  handed  me  a  check  for  the  old 
lady,  jumped  out,  and  started  the  train.  He 
treated  me  as  though  he  thought  I  was  a  fool ; 
and  I  was  myself  inclined  to  believe  he  was 
more  than  half  right. 

Several  passengers  had  left  the  car  at  this 
station,  and  when  I  returned  to  my  seat,  I  found 
that  Mr,  Collingsby  had  changed  his  place  for 
one  where  he  had  a  whole  chair  to  himself,  at 
some  distance  from  the  old  lady.  I  had  no 
doubt  he  was  glad  to  escape  from  the  vicinity 
of  the  troublesome  passenger  ;  but  he  still  read 
his  newspaper,  as  though  nothing  had  for  a  mo 
ment  ruffled  the  current  of  his  thoughts. 

"  I  knew  he  wouldn't  dare  to  put  me  out  of 
the  car ! "  said  Mrs.  Whippleton,  as  I  resumed 
my  seat  at  her  side.  "  Don't  talk  to  me !  He 
didn't  dare  to  perpetuate  such  an  outrage." 

"  We  are  all  right  now,"  I   replied. 
4 


50  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  Yes,  we  are.  Put  me  out !  I  should  like 
to  seen  him  done  it  !  I  should  !  I  reckon  my  son 
Charles  would  have  taught  him  what  it  was  to 
perpetuate  such  an  outrage  on  his  mother.  As 
for  that  Mr.  Collingsby,  he's  a  mean  man  !  Only 
to  think  that  he  didn't  know  me  !  " 

"  Have  you   ever  met   him?" 

"  Have  I  ?  Yes,  I  have.  I  have  been  in  the 
counting-room  when  he  was  there,  and  he  looked 
right  at  me  !  And  now  he  don't  know  me  !  No 
matter ;  that  conductor  didn't  dare  to  put  me 
out  of  the  car  !  He  would  have  lost  his  place 
if  he  had." 

I  handed  her  the  check  which  the  gentleman 
ly  official  had  given  me. 

"What's   that?" 

"  Your   check." 

"  He's  gettin'  very  perlite.  How  came  he  to 
give  you  this  ?  " 

"  Because  I  paid  your  fare,"  I  replied,  in  a 
low  tone  ;  for  I  did  not  care  to  expose  my  in 
nocence  to  the  people  around  me. 

"You  did?" 

"  Yes ;  he  would  certainly  have  put  you  out 
of  the  car  if  I  had  not." 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  51 

"  I   don't  believe   a  word   on't." 

"  I  do,  Mrs.  Whippleton.  He  says  you  have 
done  the  same  thing  before." 

"  He's  a  fearful  liar.  I'll  tell  my  son  Charles 
all  about  it,  and,  if  he  has  any  influence,  that 
man  shall  smart  for  it." 

"  I  don't  think  the  conductor  is  to  blame.  He 
only  did  his  duty." 

"  Then  you  think  I'm  to  blame,"  said  she, 
putting  on  her  dignity. 

"If  you   lost  your  ticket  — " 

"  Do  you  think  I  didn't  lose  it  ? "  she  inter 
posed,  quick  to  catch  even  an  implied  imputation. 

"  Of  course  1  think  you  did  lose  it.  But  the 
conductor  cannot  pass  every  one  who  says  he 
has  lost  his  ticket." 

"  Well,  I  don't  care.  It  was  a  mean  trick, 
and  I'll  tell  Charles  all  about  it." 

"  I  wouldn't  say  anything  to  him  about  it.  It 
will  only  worry  him ;  and  the  conductor  isn't  to 
blame." 

"  Do  you  think  it  is  right  to  put  a  lone  wo 
man  out  of  the  car  because  she  lost  her  ticket  ?  " 

"  The  conductor  didn't  know  you." 

"  Yes,  he  did   know  me.     I  rid  over  this  road 


52  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

only   a   week    ago,    when    I    went    down    to    St. 
Louis   to   see   my   nephew." 

It  was  useless  to  argue  the  point  with  her. 
Perhaps,  if  she  had  made  no  fuss  when  she  got 
into  the  car,  the  conductor  might  have  enter 
tained  a  different  opinion  of  her.  I  wanted  to 
obtain  some  information  of  her  in  regard  to  the 
Collingsby  family ;  and  I  am  willing  to  offer  this 
as  the  reason  for  my  chivalrous  conduct. 

"  You  know  Mr.  Collingsby,  if  he  does  not 
know  you,"  I  said,  in  order  to  introduce  the 
subject. 

"He's  my  son's  pardner  in  business." 
u  Are  you  personally  acquainted  with  him  ?  " 
"  Well,  I  can't  say  I  am  much  acquainted  with 
him.     His   folks   and  ourn   don't  visit  much,   for, 
you  see,  the  Collingsbys  are  rich  and  smart." 
"  He  has  a  brother,  I  have  heard." 
"  Yes  ;   his  brother  Joseph  is  in  Europe,  with 
his  wife  and  his  sister." 

"  His  sister  ?  "  I  queried,  deeply  interested  in 
this  branch  of  the  topic. 

"  Her  name's  Louise.  She  merried  a  good-for- 
nothin'  feller  in  St.  Louis,  and  left  him;  so  she's 
a  grass  widder  now." 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  53 

"  Did  you  ever  see  her  ?  " 

"  I  never  did ;  but.  law  sake,  I've  hearn  my 
son  Charles  tell  all  about  'em.  He  knows  'em, 
root  and  branch;  and  they  are  all  on  'em  jest 
about  as  proud  as  Lucifer,  and  as  consayted  as 
a  pullet  over  her  fust  egg.  They're  rich,  and 
that's  all  that  can  be  said  on  'em.  My  son  Charles 
does  all  the  business  of  the  firm,  and  if  it  wan't 
for  him  they'd  all  gone  to  ruin  long  ago." 

"  But  this  Mr.  Collingsby  has  a  father  ?  " 

"  Yes  ;  and  he's  jest  like  all  the  rest  on  'em. 
They  are  all  proud  and  consayted,  and  they  come 
naterally  enough  by  it,  for  the  old  man  thinks 
the  ground  ain't  good  enough  for  him  to  tread 
on." 

"  But  he  is  not  in  business  now  ?  " 

"  Ain't  he,  though  ?  Yes,  he  is.  He's  the 
sleepin'  pardner  of  the  house  of  Collingsby  and 
Whippleton.  He  put  some  money  into  it ;  but 
my  son  Charles  finds  all  the  brains." 

Of  course  I  could  not  help  having  a  very  high 
estimate  of  her  son  Charles  ;  but  I  was  not  quite 
prepared  to  believe  that  my  grandfather  and  my 
uncles  were  so  deficient  in  everything  but  pride 
as  she  represented.  Mrs.  Whippleton  continued 


54 

to  enlighten  me  in  regard  to  the  character  and 
antecedents  of  the  Collingsbys  until  the  train 
stopped  for  dinner.  I  got  out,  and  took  a  lunch, 
after  the  old  lady  had  refused  my  invitation  to 
do  so.  Reflecting  that  she  had  no  money,  I 
carried  her  a  cup  of  tea  and  some  sandwiches, 
which  she  did  not  refuse.  The  tea  was  hot  and 
strong,  and  in  refined  and  elegant  phrase,  she 
informed  me  that  it  lt  went  to  the  right  spot." 
I  returned  the  cup  and  saucer  as  the  bell  rang, 
and  resumed  my  place  at  her  side. 

"  You  are  a  real  nice  young  man,  and  Fm  only 
sorry  I  didn't  take  you  into  the  seat  with  me 
when  you  fust  got  in,"  said  she,  apparently  over 
come  by  my  chivalrous  devotion  to  her  comfort. 

"  Thank  you,  madam,"  I  replied.  "  I  remem 
bered  that  you  said  you  had  not  money  enough 
even  to  buy  a  dinner,  and  I  always  like  to  do  as 
I'd  be  done  by." 

"  But  I  ain't  so  poor  as  you  think  for.  I  will 
pay  you  for  my  fare  and  for  my  tea,"  she  con 
tinued ;  and,  to  my  astonishment,  she  took  from 
the  folds  of  her  dress  a  roll  of  bills,  which  had 
been  carefully  pinned  in. 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OP   A    CLERK.  55 

"  I  thought  you  had  no  money  !  "  I  exclaimed, 
amazed  at  the  sight  I  saw. 

"  I  didn't  want  to  rob  you.  I  hate  mean  folks, 
and  I  ain't  afeered  on  'em,"  she  added,  as  she 
handed  me  the  twelve  dollars  I  had  paid  on  her 
account. 

"  But  you  may  find  your  ticket,"  I  suggested. 

"  I  don't  expect  to  find  it,"  she  replied,  with 
abundant  resignation. 

"  If  you  do,  I  will  get  the  money  for  it." 

"  I  shall  not  find  it.  To  tell  the  truth,  I  didn't 
have  no  ticket,"  she  answered,  in  a  low  tone,  and 
with  a  vile  chuckling,  which  indicated  that  she 
was  not  to  blame,  even  if  her  clever  trick  had 
failed. 

I  took  the  twelve  dollars,  and  considered  my 
self  the  luckiest  person  in  the  world.  I  did  not 
blame  Mr.  Collingsby  for  not  recognizing  her, 
even  if  he  did  know  her,  and  I  begrudged  the 
quarter  I  had  expended  upon  her  in  tea  and 
sandwiches. 


66  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OB 


CHAPTER    V. 

IN  WHICH   PHIL    TAKES  A  ROOM   AT   MRS.  WHIPPLETON'S 
BOARDING-HOUSE. 

IT  Was  quite  a  shock  to  me  to  find  that  one 
Whom  I  had  supposed  to  be  honest  was  guilty 
of  a  deliberate  attempt  to  defraud  the  railroad 
Company  out  of  the  sum  of  twelve  dollars;  who 
had  resorted  to  gross  lies  and  mean  deception  to 
carry  her  point.  Upon  my  honor  and  conscience, 
I  Would  rather  have  lost  the  twelve  dollars  I  had 
advanced  than  had  the  old  woman  turn  out  to  be 
a  swindler.  She  might  be  fussy,  she  might  be 
disagreeable,  she  might  be  a  dozen  things  that  are 
uncomfortable  and  unpleasant,  if  she  had  only 
meant  to  be  true  and  honest,  and  I  could  have 
respected  her. 

I  was  amazed ;  first,  that  she  could  be  guilty  of 
such  a  vile  trick  •  and  second,  that  she  had  had 
the  hardihood  to  acknowledge  it,  even  to  a  boy 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  57 

like  me.  My  respect  for  the  knowledge  and  pen 
etration  of  the  gentlemanly  conductor  rose  about 
ten  degrees,  and  I  was  tempted  to  say  to  myself 
that  I  would  never  again  interfere  in  behalf  of 
another  "  lone  woman,"  especially  if  she  was  the 
mother  of  one  as  smart  as  her  son  Charles. 

"  You  needn't  tell  that  nasty  conductor  what  I 
say/'  said  Mrs.  Whippleton,  as  if  conscious  that 
she  had  been  imprudent  in  revealing  so  much 
to  me. 

"  I  don't  think  he  needs  to  be  told.  It  appears 
now  that  he  understood  the  case  perfectly,"  I 
replied,  disgusted  with  my  seat-mate.  "  He  said 
you  did  not  have  any  ticket,  and  that  it  was  all  a 
trick  to  evade  paying  your  fare." 

"  He  didn't  know  that.  He  may  say  just  the 
same  thing  six  times,  and  be  mistaken  five  on 
'em." 

"  Didn't  you  intend  to  pay  your  fare  ? " 

"  Perhaps  I  should,  if  they  hadn't  pussicuted 
me  so  in  the  beginning." 

"  But  you  didn't  buy  a  ticket." 

"  No,  I  didn't.  You  are  a  green  boy.  What 
difference  does  it  make  to  this  railroad  company 


58  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

whether  I  paid  my  fare  or  not  ?  They've  got 
money  enough." 

"  But  they  wouldn't  make  much  if  people  didn't 
pay." 

"  It  don't  make  no  difference  if  one  don't  pay 
now  and  then.  You  hain't  seen  much  of  the 
world  yet,  my  boy.  When  you  have  lived  to  be 
as  old  as  I  am,  you'll  know  more." 

"  I  hope  1  shall  not  live  so  long  as  to  be  proud 
of  being  dishonest,"  I  replied,  with  considerable 
spirit. 

"  Dishonest?  What  do  you  mean  by  that?  Do 
you  pretend  to  say  I'm  dishonest?" 

"  Well,  madam,  we  needn't  quarrel  about  words ; 
but,  if  I  had  tried  to  cheat  the  railroad  company 
out  of  twelve  dollars,  or  twelve  cents,  I  should 
call  it  being  dishonest." 

"  You  are  a  silly  boy." 

"  I  hope  I  always  shall  be  silly,  then.  I  should 
think  God  had  forsaken  me,  if  I  could  deliberately 
try  to  wrong  any  one." 

"  You  haven't  seen  the  world.  I  have  worked 
hard  in  my  time.  It  took  rne  a  good  while  to  earn 
twelve  dollars ;  and  when  I  see  a  chance  to  save 
twelve  dollars,  I  generally  always  does  so." 


THE    CATASTROPHES   OF   A    CLERK,  59 

"You  don't  steal  twelve  dollars — do  you  — 
when  you  get  a  chance  ? " 

"  Steal !  I  hope  not.  I  never  did  such  a  thing 
in  my  life.  No,  I'm  an  honest  woman ;  everybody 
that  knows  me  will  say  that.  If  that  nasty  con 
ductor  had  used  me  well,  I  should  have  paid  my 
fare ;  but  it  won't  make  no  difference  to  the  com 
pany  whether  I  did  or  not.  Why  shouldn't  Mr. 
Collingsby  pay  his  fare  as  well  as  me  ?  " 

"  He  did  ;  I  saw  him  give  up  his  ticket." 

"  You  are  a  green  boy.  His  ticket !  It  was  a 
free  pass.  His  father  is  a  great  railroad  man,  and 
the  whole  family  ride  for  nothing  whenever  they 
please.  It  is  just  as  right  that  I  should  go  free  as 
he  ;  and  I  can  tell  you,  if  I  can  get  over  the  road 
for  nothing,  it  is  my  duty  to  clo  so  —  a  duty  I  owe 
to  myself  and  to  my  son  Charles.  You  must  live 
and  learn,  young  man;  and  when  you  can  go  over 
the  road  for  nothing,  don't  waste  twelve  dollars." 

I  did  not  like  the  old  lady's  philosophy,  though 
I  have  since  learned  that  there  are  a  great  many 
people  in  the  world  who  think  it  is  no  sin  to  cheat 
a  railroad  corporation  out  of  a  few  dollars,  more 
or  less.  I  once  heard  a  man,  who  pretended  to 
be  a  gentleman,  boasting  that  he  evaded  paying 


60 

his  fare  in  the  train  because  the  conductor  did  not 
call  for  it.  I  hold  him  to  be  a  swindler,  just  as 
much  as  though  he  had  been  called  upon  for  his 
ticket.  When  he  got  into  the  car,  he  virtually 
bargained  with  the  railroad  company  to  convey 
him  a  certain  distance  for  a  certain  price.  No 
matter  if  the  conductor  did  not  formally  demand 
payment ;  it  was  his  duty  to  pay,  and  he  was  just 
as  much  a  swindler  and  a  thief,  as  though  he  had 
stolen  or  cheated  some  individual  out  of  the 
money. 

I  feel  better  now,  after  venting  my  righteous 
indignation  on  this  subject.  I  have  a  good  deal 
more  respect  for  the  thief  who  steals  your  money, 
or  the  gentlemanly  swindler  who  plunders  you  of 
it  by  the  polite  tricks  of  his  art,  than  for  these 
pretentious  knaves  who  lie  without  uttering  a 
word,  and  steal  without  lifting  a  finger. 

Mrs.  Whippleton  continued,  for  an  hour,  to  as 
sure  me  that  I  was  extraordinarily  green,  impart 
ing  a  lesson  on  worldly  wisdom,  which,  I  am 
happy  to  say,  at  the  age  of  twenty-eight,  has  been 
utterly  wasted  upon  me. 

"  You  haven't  seen  much  of  the  world,  and  you 
don't  know  what's  what  yet;  but  I  like  you, 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OP   A    CLERK.  61 

young  man.  You  have  behaved  very  well  to  a 
lone  woman,  and  you  shan't  lose  nothing  by  it," 
she  continued. 

"  I  am  entirely  satisfied/''  I  replied. 

"  I  didn't  mean  you  should  lose  anything  by  me. 
I  might  have  cheated  you  out  of  twelve  dollars 
just  as  easy  as  nothing." 

I  was  certainly  very  much  obliged  to  her  for 
her  kind  consideration  in  this  respect;  and  I  was 
forced  to  acknowledge  the  truth  of  her  proposi 
tion.  Though  I  despised  her,  I  could  not  help 
seeing  that  she  had  been  just  towards  rne. 

"  I  am  very  much  obliged  to  you  for  not  doing 
it,"  I  replied. 

"  Xo :  I  never  cheat  nobody ;  and  I  hate  mean 
folks.  It  would  have  been  mean  in  me  to  let  you 
lose  twelve  dollars  after  what  you  did  for  me.  If 
it  hadn't  been  for  you  I  should  have  been  put  out 
of  the  car." 

"  But  you  had  money  to  pay  your  fare." 

"  I  wouldn't  pay  that  nasty  conductor  after  I 
had  told  him  I  had  no  money.  One  has  to  be  per 
sistent." 

"  I  think  you  have  been  consistent  all  the  way 
through." 


62  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  Thank'ee.  After  what  you  did,  and  the  tea 
you  fetched,  I  felt  an  interest  in  you  ;  and  it  ain't 
many  folks  I  do  feel  an  interest  in.7' 

Of  course  not !  Not  many  people  would  have 
done  anything  for  her  to  induce  her  to  feel  an  in 
terest  in  them. 

"  I  reckon  you  don't  belong  in  Chicago,"  she 
continued. 

"  I  do  not.     I  never  was  there." 

"  Well,  it's  a  wicked  place." 

Any  place  must  be  wicked  from  her  stand-point 

"  I  suppose  it  is  no  worse  than  any  city  of  its 
size." 

"  I  don't  know's  it  is.  I  suppose  you  have 
friends  there." 

"No." 

"  Well,  where  you  goin'  to  stop,  then  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know  yet.  I  shall  go  to  some  hotel,  I 
suppose." 

"  Hotels  are  awful  dear." 

"  I  think  I  can  stand  it  for  a  week  or  so  at  a 
cheap  hotel.  I  don't  mean  to  go  to  the  Tremont 
House." 

"  Don't  waste    your    money    in    that    way,  you 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLKItiv.  63 

silly  boy.  It  will  cost  you  a  dollar  and  a  half  a 
day  to  livo  at  any  hotel." 

••What  shall  I  do?"  I  asked,  willing-  to  profit 
by  the  old  lady's  knowledge,  while  1  abhorred  her 
principles. 

"  I  keep  boarders  myself;  and  I  only  charge 
'em  four  dollars  a  week.  I  don't  take  none  for  a 
week  or  two;  but  I'll  take  you,  after  what's  hap 
pened,  at  the  same  price.  You  can  save  six  or 
seven  dollars  in  this  way." 

u  I  thank  you,  Mrs.  Whippleton.  I'm  very 
much  obliged  to  you,  and  will  go  to  your  house1.'' 

1  was  really  relieved  by  this  friendly  oiler,  for  I 
did  not  like  to  go  to  a  hotel  among  total  strangers. 
Whatever  Mrs.  Whippleton  was  morally  could  not 
allect  me  as  a  boarder  for  a  brief  period,  while  the 
saving  of  expense  was  a  great  item  to  me.  When 
the  train  arrived  at  Chicago,  the  old  lady  gathered 
up  her  bundles,  with  my  assistance,  and  we 
walked  to  her  house,  which  was  at  a  considerable 
distance  from  the  station.  The  dwelling  was  a 
large,  plain  house.  I  found  that  it  was  furnished 
in  a  very  cheap  style.  The  landlady  called  a  ser 
vant  girl,  who  conducted  me  to  a  small  room  over 
the  entry,  in  which  there  was  a  narrow  bed.  It 


64  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

did  not  compare  favorably  with  my  quarters  at 
Mrs.  Greenough's,  but  I  thought  I  could  stand  it 
for  a  week.  When  I  went  down  stairs,  I  was  in 
vited  to  tea  with  the  old  lady.  I  came  to  the  con 
clusion  that  the  boarders  in  the  house  paid  full 
price  for  all  they  had,  for  the  butter  was  very 
strong,  and  the  dishes  were  not  particularly  clean. 

Before  we  had  finished  our  supper,  Mr.  Charles 
Whippleton  was  announced.  He  came  into  the 
room  where  the  old  lady  was  sipping  her  tea,  and 
after  casting  a  sharp  look  at  me,  he  threw  himself 
into  a  large  rocking-chair,  which  was  evidently 
kept  for  the  especial  use  of  his  mother.  He  was 
well  dressed,  and  after  I  had  heard  so  much  about 
the  man,  I  scrutinized  his  features  quite  closely. 
I  was  not  favorably  impressed,  for  there  was  an 
expression  of  sharpness  and  cunning  in  his  face 
which  did  not  suit  me.  Mrs.  Whippleton  did  not 
take  the  trouble  to  introduce  me. 

"  Got  home,  mother  ?  "  said  he.  without  wasting 
any  of  his  breath  in  affectionate  terms. 

"  I  have,  thank  fortin ;  but  I  didn't  expect  to 
get  home." 

il  Why,  what's  the  matter  now  ?  "  demanded  the 
dutiful  son,  whose  question  implied  that  something 
was  always  the  matter. 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  65 

Mrs.  Whippleton  informed  him  what  was  the 
matter  BOW,  including  a  detailed  account  of  her 
grievances.  To  my  surprise,  the  affectionate  son 
informed  her  that  she  was  an  old  fool,  glancing  at 
me,  as  though,  after  a  day's  experience  with  his 
maternal  parent,  I  ought  to  be  able  to  confirm  his 
rash  statement  in  the  fullest  manner. 

I  prudently  held  my  peace. 

"  I  may  be  an  old  fool,  but  I  know  when  I  am 
insulted." 

u  I  would  rather  given  fifty  dollars  than  had  you 
appeal  to  Mr.  Collingsby." 

"  He's  a  mean  man." 

"  Perhaps  he  is ;  but  I  must  keep  on  the  right 
side  of  him." 

<k  You  can  keep  on  the  right  side  of  him, 
Charles ;  but  don't  ask  me  to  do  so,  for  I  hate 
mean  folks.  If  I  should  meet  that  man  in  the 
street  to-night,  I  wouldn't  speak  to  him." 

u  He  wouldn't  cry  if  you  didn't,"  sneered  Mr. 
Charles. 

"  I  don't  know  as  I  should  ever  have  got  home, 
if  this  young  man  had  not  took  care  on  me." 

Mr.  Whippleton  glanced  at  me  again,  as  though 
he  thought  I  was  as  big  a  fool  as  his  maternal  parent. 
5 


66  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"Well,  let  all  that  go,"  continued  the  dutiful 
son.  "Did  you  see  Rufus  in  St.  Louis?" 

"  I  did  see  him ;  and  only  to  think  on't,  after 
I  had  taken  all  that  trouble  and  spent  all  that 
money,  he  wouldn't  come,"  replied  the  old  lady, 
indignantly. 

"  I  hope  you  are  satisfied  now,"  added  Mr. 
Charles,  with  much  disgust. 

"  Well,  I  had  my  visit,  any  how." 

"  What's  the  reason  Rufus  won't  come  ?  " 

"  His  folks  don't  want  him  to  leave  home. 
They  say  he  isn't  very  well — just  as  though  I 
couldn't  take  care  on  him  !  " 

"  Very  well ;  you've  kept  me  out  of  a  clerk  for 
three  weeks  for  his  sake,  and  that  is  all  it 
amounts  to." 

Mr.  Charles  departed  in  disgust;  and  Mrs. 
Whippleton  explained  that  she  had  been  to  St. 
Louis  to  induce  her  nephew's  son,  a  young  man  of 
eighteen,  to  take  the  place  of  entry  clerk  in  the 
counting-room  of  the  firm.  That  was  just  such  a 
place  as  I  wanted ;  and,  while  the  garrulous  land 
lady  was  detailing  the  particulars,  I  considered 
whether  I  should  apply  for  it. 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  67 


CHAPTER  VI. 

IN    WHICH    PHIL    IS    ENGAGED     AS    ENTRY   CLERK   FOP 
COLLINGSBY    AND   WHIPPLETON. 

T  INTENDED  to  be  a  clerk,  but  I  had  not 
thought  of  such  a  thing  as  applying  for  a 
situation  in  Chicago.  I  did  not  like  the  idea  of 
being  separated  from  my  father ;  but,  when  I 
learned  that  there  was  a  vacancy  in  the  counting- 
room  of  Messrs.  Collingsby  and  Whippleton,  I  was 
tempted  to  obtain  it  if  I  could.  I  did  not  expect 
or  desire  to  make  a  violent  assault  upon  my  grand 
father,  but  to  reach  him  by  easy  arid  gradual 
approaches.  A  situation  in  the  house  of  which 
he  was  the  silent  partner  I  thought  would  help 
me  amazingly.  It  seemed  to  me  that  I  could 
not  plan  anything  better  to  accomplish  my  pup 
pose. 

I  could  get  acquainted  with  my  uncle  and  my 
grandfather.    I  hoped  that  I  might  even  be  able 


68  DESK  AND  DEBIT,  OR 

to  do  something  to  win  their  regard  and  favor. 
Certainly  the  first  step  towards  such  a  result 
was  to  place  myself  in  a  position  where  I  could 
see  them  occasionally.  I  did  not  like  the  looks 
of  Mr.  Whippleton,  and  I  was  afraid  he  had 
imbibed  the  worldly  wisdom  of  his  mother.  But 
this  feeling  was  not  to  weigh  against  the  im 
mense  advantages  I  might  derive  from  meeting 
the  Collingsbys.  The  more  I  thought  of  the 
matter,  the  more  I  was  inclined  to  apply  for  the 
place.  I  believed  that  I  was  fully  competent  to 
keep  a  set  of  books  by  double  entry,  and  certainly 
I  was  fit  for  an  entry  clerk. 

"  What  kind  of  a  place  is  it  that  you  wished 
your  nephew  to  fill,  Mrs.  Whippleton  ? "  I  asked, 
after  Mr.  Charles  had  gone. 

"  Well,  I  don't  know  much  about  it,  but 
Charles  called  it  an  entry  clerk.  I  suppose  he 
has  to  do  his  work  out  in  the  entry  because  the 
counting-room  isn't  big  enough,  or  because  he 
ain't  smart  enough  to  come  into  the  presence 
of  such  mighty  men  as  that  Mr.  Collingsby." 

"  How  much   do   they   pay  him  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know  exactly ;  but  not  more'n  four 
or  five  dollars  a  week — just  enough  for  him  to 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLEEK.  69 

starve  on.  You  see,  I  heard  that  my  nephew's 
son  wanted  a  place,  and  couldn't  get  one  in  St. 
Louis.  I  thought  this  would  be  a  good  chance 
for  him.  I  wanted  to  make  'em  a  visit,  for  they 
owed  me  some  money  I  lent  'em.  I  told  Charles 
he  must  take  Rufus,  and  I  put  him  off  till  I 
was  able  to  go  to  St.  Louis.  The  spring  busi 
ness  was  comin'  on,  and  he  couldn't  wait;  so  1 
hurried  off.  I  got  the  money  my  nephew  owed 
me ;  but  they  wouldn't  let  the  boy  come  to 
Chicago,  though  I  told  7em  I  went  down  pur 
pose  arter  him.  Charles  fretted  a  good  deal 
because  I  made  him  wait;  but  Charles  minds 
his  mother,  if  he  is  sassy  sometimes.  He  knows 
I've  got  some  money  that  I  can't  take  with  me 
when  I  leave  this  world  for  a  better  one." 

I  thought  it  was  rather  impudent  for  her  to 
talk  about  a  better  world,  when  she  was  doing 
all  she  could  to  make  this  a  mean  one ;  and  I 
doubted  whether,  unless  she  mended  her  ways, 
the  other  would  be  a  better  one  to  her. 

"  I  have  two  merried  daughters  that  need 
what  little  I've  got  more  than  Charles  does  ; 
and  he  owes  me  now  for  what  I  let  him  have 
to  set  up  in  business.  He  owes  all  he  has  in 


70  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

this  world  to  me,"  continued  the  old  lady,  com 
placently. 

"  He  wants  an  entry  clerk  immediately  ?  "  I 
suggested. 

"  Yes ;  Charles  has  had  to  do  all  the  work 
himself,  for,  you  see,  he  keeps  the  books  of  the 
firm.  Well,  he  does  all  the  business,  for  that 
matter.  He's  all  there  is  of  the  firm,  except 
the  money  the  Collingsbys  put  in.  Howsom- 
ever,  I  suppose  it's  just  as  well  that  Rufus 
didn't  come,  for  ef  he  had,  I  should  had  to 
board  him  for  three  dollars  a  week ;  and  he's  a 
growin'  boy,  and  eats  more'n  a  man." 

"  Do  you  think  I  could  get  this   place  ?  " 

"  You  !  My  stars  !  I  don't  know  !  "  exclaimed 
the  old  lady.  "  Can  you  write  ?  " 

"  Yes." 

"  Good  at  riggers  ?  " 

"  Pretty  good,  I    think." 

"  They  want  somebody  that's  smart.  Charles 
was  afraid  Rufus  wouldn't  do,  but  I  desisted 
on  having  on  him ;  and  Charles  knows  I'm  smart 
enough  to  make  a  will  now  if  I  take  a  notion." 

"  I    didn't    think    of    looking    for    a    place    in 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  71 

Chicago/'  I  added  ;  "  but  this  looks  like  a  good 
chance." 

"  Why  didn't  you  say  so  before  Charles  went 
off?  If  you  want  the  place,  you  shall  have  it. 
I  say  so,  and  I  know  what  I'm  saying;  and 
Charles  has  been  afraid  all  along  that  I  might 
make  a  will." 

"  I  should  like  to  go  on  trial ;  but  I  don't 
know  that  I  can  stay  in  Chicago  a  great  while." 

"  They  want  somebody  right  off,  and  some 
body  that's  smart." 

"  I  think  I  could  suit  them.  I  can  keep  books ; 
and  besides,  I  have  worked  at  carpentering  for 
two  years,  and  I  know  something  about  lumber. 
Where  is  your  son  now  ?  Is  he  in  the  house  ?  " 

"  Sakes,  no !  "  exclaimed  the  old  lady,  begin 
ning  to  be  excited.  "  He  don't  board  here ; 
'tain't  smart  enough  for  him ;  but  I'll  go  with 
you  arid  see  him." 

"  Thank  you,  Mrs.  Whippleton." 

"  I'm  pretty  tired ;  but  I'm  allus  willin'  to  do 
what  I  can  for  a  feller-cretur.  I  went  clear 
down  to  St.  Louis  to  help  my  nephew's  son ; 
and  I'll  do  as  much  for  you  as  I  would  for  him." 


72 

"  I  won't  trouble  you  to  go  with  me.  If  you 
will  tell  me  where  he  is,  I  will  go  alone." 

"  That  won't  do.  I  must  lay  down  the  law  to 
Charles ;  and  if  he  dares  to  do  any  different 
from  what  I  tell  him,  he  won't  touch  any  more 
of  my  money  —  that's  all." 

I  did  not  exactly  like  the  idea  of  having  Mr. 
Charles  placed  under  compulsion  to  take  me, 
whether  he  liked  me  or  not;  and  I  decided,  if 
he  objected  to  the  arrangement,  to  take  myself 
out  of  his  way.  We  walked  to  the  residence 
of  Mr.  Charles,  which  was  a  genteel  house  in 
a  good  section  of  the  city.  He  had  a  parlor 
and  bed-room,  and  seemed  to  live  in  good  style. 
Before  she  said  anything  about  me,  Mrs.  Whip- 
pleton  took  her  son  into  the  entry,  where,  I 
suppose,  she  "  laid  down  the  law "  to  him." 

"  My  mother  says  you  want  a  place  as  entry 
clerk,"  said  Mr.  Charles,  when  they  returned  to 
the  parlor,  where  I  was  seated. 

"  Yes,  sir,"  I  replied,  with  becoming  defer 
ence. 

"  When  can  you  go  to  work  ?  " 

"  At  once,  sir." 

"  To-morrow  morning  ?  " 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  73 

"Yes,  sir." 

He  then  questioned  me  in  regard  to  my  knowl 
edge  of  book-keeping  and  arithmetic,  and  wanted 
to  know  if  I  understood  board  measure,  and 
could  read  lumber  marks.  I  told  him  I  had  been 
a  carpenter,  and  knew  all  about  lumber.  I  could 
keep  a  set  of  books  by  double  entry,  and 
thought  I  was  competent  to  perform  all  sorts 
of  mercantile  calculations.  But  he  was  too 
shrewd  and  suspicious  to  take  me  on  my  own 
recommendation.  He  gave  me  a  sheet  of  pa 
per,  pen,  and  ink,  and  told  me  to  write  my 
name. 

"  Farringford ! "  exclaimed  he,  as  he  read  what 
I  wrote. 

"  Yes,  sir  ;  that   is  my   name." 

"  Do  you  belong  to  the  Farringfords  of  St 
Louis?" 

"  Yes ;  but  I  was  brought  up  on  the  upper 
Missouri." 

"  Well,  your  name  is  nothing  in  your  favor ; 
however,  that  isn't  your  fault,"  he  added,  mag 
nanimously  ;  but  fortunately  he  said  no  more 
on  that  subject.  "  Now,  what  is  the  interest  on 


74  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

two  thousand  dollars  for  six  months  at  eight 
per  cent?" 

"Eighty  dollars/7  I  replied,  as  soon  as  he  had 
the  question  out  of  his  mouth,  for  my  father  had 
practised  me  thoroughly  in  all  the  short  methods 
of  computing  interest. 

He  gave  me  half  a  dozen  other  problems ; 
but,  as  he  selected  only  those  which  he  could 
solve  in  his  own  mind,  I  was  very  prompt  in 
my  replies.  He  then  wrote  out  an  example  in 
averaging  accounts,  and  as  it  was  not  a  difficult 
one,  and  involved  only  round  numbers,  I  did  it 
very  readily. 

"  But  the  most  important  thing  with  us,"  added 
Mr.  Whippleton,  "  is  simple  addition.  I  don't 
like  to  wait  half  an  hour  for  a  clerk  to  run  up 
a  column  of  figures." 

He  then  wrote  about  twenty  sums  of  money, 
each  having  five  or  six  figures,  and  told  me  to 
add  them.  My  father  had  always  assured  me  that 
simple  addition  tried  the  young  accountant  more 
than  anything  else,  and  he  had  insisted  that  I 
should  practise  it  until  I  could  run  up  a  column 
as  rapidly  as  my  eye  could  take  in  the  figures. 
I  had  used  this  exercise  for  months,  until  I  flat- 


THE     CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  75 

tered  myself  I  could  give  the  sum  of  a  column 
as  quick  as  any  practised  book-keeper.  At  the 
same  time,  he  had  taught  me  his  own  method, 
that  of  taking  two  figures  at  once,  and  adding  their 
sum  to  the  result  already  obtained.  It  was  just 
as  easy  for  one  quick  at  figures  to  add  thirteen, 
sixteen,  eighteen,  or  nineteen,  as  it  was  to  add 
three,  six,  eight,  or  nine.  Thus,  if  the  figures 
in  the  column  were  6,  5,  4,  7,  9,  3,  8,  2,  9,  1,  my 
father  added  them  in  couples,  for  it  required 
no  effort  of  the  mind  to  add  six  and  five,  four 
and  seven,  nine  and  three,  eight  and  two,  or  nine 
and  one  ;  and  the  mental  process  was  eleven, 
twenty-two,  thirty-four,  forty-four,  fifty-four. 

I  had  practised  this  system  until  I  could  carry 
it  along  as  rapidly  as  I  could  by  adding  a  single 
figure  at  a  time.  Mr.  Whippleton  made  his 
figures  in  duplicate  when  he  wrote  them,  and 
added  one  himself  to  prove  that  I  was  right 
or  wrong.  Before  he  was  half  done,  I  had  my 
result. 

"  You  are  wrong/'  said  he,  decidedly,  when  he 
had  finished.  "  I  would  rather  have  you  use 
twice  as  much  time,  and  have  the  result  right, 


76  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

than  do  it  quick,  and  have  it  wrong.  Accuracy 
first,  and  speed  next." 

That  was  just  what  my  father  had  always  told 
me,  and  I  was  rather  mortified  at  the  failure. 
I  went  over  the  columns  again,  with  the  same 
result. 

"  I  get  it  so  again,  sir,"  I  replied,  when  I  had 
added  the  columns  in  an  opposite  direction  from 
that  taken  the  first  time. 

Mr.  Whippleton  added  his  figures  a  second 
time ;  but  there  was  still  two  hundred  dollars' 
difference  in  the  two  amounts. 

"  You  add  mine  and  I  will  add  yours,"  said 
he,  as  we  exchanged  papers. 

This  time  I  made  his  figures  come  out  right ; 
but  I  was  also  astonished  to  find  that  he  too 
made  mine  come  out  correctly. 

"  I  see  it,  sir,"  I  added.  "  In  the  fourth  item 
the  five  on  your  paper  is  a  three  on  mine,  and 
we  are  both  right." 

"  Exactly  so !  You'll  do,  young  man,  though 
I  should  like  to  see  you  make  out  a  bill.  We 
sell  Tobey  Tinkum  forty-two  thousand  Michigan 
pine  boards,  clear,  at  thirty  dollars ; "  and  he 
proceeded  to  give  me  several  items,  which  I 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  77 

could  not  have  written  down  if  I  had  not  been 
a  carpenter,  for  the  technical  terms  would  have 
bothered  and  defeated  me. 

When  my  late  employer,  Mr.  Clinch,  found 
that  I  had  some  knowledge  of  arithmetic  and 
accounts,  he  used  to  set  me  at  work  on  his  bills, 
to  see  if  they  were  cast  up  correctly.  This  ex 
perience  had  prepared  me  for  precisely  the  ordeal 
I  was  at  present  undergoing.  I  wrote  the  bill 
as  handsomely  as  I  could,  though  without  strain 
ing  over  it,  and  figured  up  the  prices,  extend 
ing  them  and  adding  them.  The  examiner 
seemed  to  be  very  much  pleased,  arid  wanted 
to  know  where  I  had  learned  so  much  about 
the  lumber  business.  I  explained,  and  told  him 
I  had  used  about  all  my  evenings  for  two  years 
in  studying. 

"  You'll  do,"  said  he.  "  Now,  what  wages  do 
you  expect?" 

"  1  don't  know ;   what  do  you  pay  ?  " 

"  Well,  wo  pay  three  or  four  dollars  a  week. 
As  you  are  pretty  good  at  figures,  we  will  give 
you  four." 

"  I  made  more  than  that  at  my  trade.     I  can't 


78  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

afford  to  work  for  four  dollars  a  week,  sir.  It 
would  only  pay  my  board." 

"What  do  you  ask?" 

"  I  will  work  eight  weeks,  say,  at  six  dollars 
a  week." 

Mr.  Whippleton  objected ;  but  I  was  firm. 
He  evidently  thought  I  was  just  the  person  he 
wanted,  and  he  finally  consented  to  my  terms, 
but  insisted  upon  making  the  time  a  year.  I  told 
him  I  could  not  agree  for  a  longer  time  than  I 
had  named  without  consulting  my  father.  He 
yielded  this  point  also,  and  I  promised  to  be  at 
the  counting-room  of  Collingsby  and  Whippleton 
the  next  morning. 

I  walked  home  with  Mrs.  Whippleton,  who 
again  assured  me  that  she  was  always  willing 
to  do  what  she  could  for  a  "  feller-cretur." 


THE    CATASTROPHES    01-    A    CLERK.  79 


CHAPTER  VII. 

IN  WHICH   PHIL   TAKES    HIS    PLACE   AT   THE  DESK,  AND 
IS   ENGAGED    FOR   A   YEAR. 


"VT^HEN  I  reached  the  house  of  Mrs.  Whip- 
T  T  pleton,  I  took  my  writing  materials  from 
my  bag,  and  wrote  a  long  letter  to  my  father,  de 
tailing  the  incidents  of  my  journey,  and  explaining 
the  motives  which  had  induced  me  to  take  the  sit 
uation  in  the  counting-room  of  Collingsby  and 
Whippleton.  I  was  satisfied  that  he  would  not 
object,  though  he  might  not  fully  approve  the 
course  I  had  taken.  I  was  up  very  early  the  next 
morning,  and  made  a  hurried  survey  of  the  city  be 
fore  breakfast.  I  walked  from  Washington  Street, 
where  my  boarding-house  was  located,  through 
Halstead  Street,  to  the  north  branch  of  the  Chi 
cago  River,  where  I  found  the  lumber-yard  of  the 
firm.  I  read  the  sign  and  examined  the  locality 
with  interest. 


80  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

I  ate  my  breakfast  at  half  past  six ;  and  though 
the  beefsteak  was  very  tough,  and  the  butter  very 
strong,  I  sustained  my  reputation  as  a  good  eater. 
I  had  lived  too  long  in  the  wilderness,  where  we 
did  not  often  have  any  butter,  to  be  thrown  off  my 
balance  by  the  accident  of  a  rancid  article,  and  I  had 
certainly  eaten  buffalo  meat  that  was  as  much 
tougher  than  any  beef  as  sole  leather  is  tougher 
than  brown  paper.  Strong  butter  and  tough  beef 
are  not  good,  I  allow  •  but  they  are  by  no  means 
the  sum  total  of  human  misery.  I  had  a  clean  con 
science,  and  T  ate  a  hearty  breakfast. 

I  had  been  told  to  be  at  the  counting-room  at 
half  past  seven;  but  I  was  on  hand  at  seven.  I 
saw  several  salesmen  and  laborers  in  the  lumber 
yard,  but  there  was  no  one  in  the  counting-room. 
I  seated  myself,  and  picked  up  the  morning  paper. 
I  did  not  find  any  paragraph  announcing  my  arri 
val  at  the  great  city  of  the  west ;  and  I  suppose  it 
was  of  no  great  consequence.  However,  I  found 
enough  to  interest  me,  till  I  was  disturbed  by  the 
entrance  of  a  young  man  about  my  own  age. 

"  Good  morning,  sir/7  said  he,  briskly,  as  he 
glanced  curiously  at  me.  "  What  can  I  do  for 
you?7' 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  81 

'<  Nothing,"  I  replied. 

"  Didn't  know  but  you  had  an  order." 

"  No,  I  have  no  order." 

He  looked  at  me  as  though  he  thought  I  ought 
to  tell  him  what  I  wanted. 

"  Can  I  sell  you  any  lumber  to-day  ? "  he  con 
tinued. 

"  I  don't  think  you  can.  I'm  waiting  to  see  MY 
Whippleton,"  I  answered,  in  order  to  save  him  the* 
trouble  of  any  unnecessary  questioning. 

"  If  you  are  in  a  hurry  you  had  better  not  wait, 
for  he  hardly  ever  gets  here  till  eight  o'clock," 
said  the  young  man,  as  he  went  to  the  desk  and 
opened  an  account  book. 

"  I'm  in  no  hurry.     I'm  going  to  work  here." 

"Is  that  so?" 

"  That's  so." 

"  Who  engaged  you  ?  " 

"Mr.  Whippleton  —  last  evening." 

"  What  are  you  going  to  do?" 

"  I  am  engaged  as  entry  clerk." 

"  Good  !  I'm  glad  to  hear  it.  I'm  yours  truly. 
Who  are  you  ?  " 

"  I'm  yours  truly,"  I  replied,  laughing. 
6 


82  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  You're  a  brick  !  My  name  is  Land  Limpedon. 
What's  yours  ?  " 

"  Philip  Farringford." 

"  Capital !  Philip  Farringford,  I'm  deuced  glad 
to  see  you  if  you  are  to  be  the  entry  clerk.  I've 
had  to  do  some  of  that  work,  and  I  don't  like  it.  I 
don't  think  writing  is  my  forte.  I  suppose  you 
can  write." 

"  I  can  make  my  mark." 

"  That's  about  all  I  can  do.  You  have  come  at 
just  the  right  time.  We  are  driven  with  business. 
By  the  way,  you  needn't  wait  for  Mr.  Whippleton. 
I'll  set  you  at  work.  I've  just  sold  a  bill,  and 
want  it  entered.  Take  your  pen,  old  boy,  and 
show  us  whether  you  can  spatter  the  ink  or  not. 
By  t}ie  way,  are  you  a  hard  brick  or  a  soft  brick  ?  " 

"  I  think  you  will  find  me  a  hard  brick,"  I  re 
plied,  at  a  venture,  for  I  had  no  idea  of  the  techni 
cal  significance  of  the  terms  he  used. 

"  Capital !  That's  a  Chicago  brick.  Did  you 
come  from  the  country  ?  " 

"  I  came  from  St.  Louis." 

"  Capital,  still !  You  don't  smell  of  mullein  and 
cornstalks.  Here's  a  good  pen.  Just  enter  these 
items,  and  give  me  a  bill  of  them,"  he  rattled  on, 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  83 

taking  a  memorandum  book  from  his  side  pocket. 
"  A  Chicago  brick  !  That's  the  brick  for  me." 

I  took  the  pen,  and  stood  at  the  desk. 

"  I  can  break  you  in  before  Whippleton  gets  here. 
Now,  charge,  F.  P.  Moleuschott — got  that  down?" 

«  Yes." 

"  Capital !  The  point  of  your  pen  is  greasy. 
But  I'll  bet  a  quarter  you  didn't  spell  the  man's 
name  right,"  he  added,  looking  at  the  page  of  the 
sales  book  where  I  had  entered  it.  "  Ton  my 
word  you  did,  though !  These  Dutchmen's  names 
bothered  me  so  that  I  used  to  get  almost  choked 
to  death  before  I  could  speak  one  of  them." 

I  had  always  been  a  diligent  student  of  the  lit 
erature  of  the  sign-boards,  and  I  was  tolerably 
familiar  even  with  German  proper  names.  It  is  a 
good  plan  for  a  young  man  who  is  going  into  busi 
ness  to  read  the  signs  in  the  streets  as  he  passes 
along. 

Mr.  Land  Limpedon  rattled  off  a  long  bill  of 
small  items,  and  jumbled  in  the  technical  terms  of 
the  trade,  with  the  evident  intention  of  bothering 
me ;  but  I  was  posted,  arid  did  not  have  to  ask  him 
to  repeat  a  single  item.  I  entered  the  charge,  arid 
made  out  the  bill. 


84  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  Capital !  "  exclaimed  the  young  salesman,  as  he 
glanced  at  the  bill.  "  I  couldn't  have  done  it  any 
better  myself." 

I  was  willing  to  believe  him  as  I  glanced  at  the 
page  of  the  sales  book  where  he  had  made  entries, 
and  saw  what  a  villanous  hand  he  wrote,  and  what 
blots  and  blunders  he  had  inflicted  upon  the  inno 
cent  white  paper.  However,  he  was  good-natured, 
and  did  not  pretend  to  be  a  book-keeper ;  so  I  was 
willing  to  forgive  him. 

"  What  time  does  Mr.  Collingsby  come  to  the 
counting-room  ?  "  I  asked,  as  he  was  looking  over 
the  bill. 

"  The  young  man  comes  about  nine  or  ten ; 
but  he  don't  stay  here  much  of  the  time.  Some 
days  the  old  gentleman  looks  in  about  eleven,  and 
some  days  he  don't,"  replied  Land,  as  he  left  the 
office. 

I  was  at  the  desk,  and  had  made  my  first  debit. 
The  situation  was  novel,  but  it  was  pleasing.  It 
was  DESK  AND  DEBIT,  for  which  I  had  been  seeking 
for  weeks. 

The  counting-room  was  divided  into  two  apart 
ments.  In  the  first,  which  occupied  the  front 
of  the  building,  were  the  desk,  the  safe,  the  books, 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OP   A   CLERK.  85 

and  the  papers.  All  the  general  business  of  the 
firm  was  transacted  here ;  and  my  position  was  be 
hind  the  desk  in  this  room.  Separated  from  it  by 
a  partition  composed  mostly  of  ground  glass  win 
dows  was  the  other  apartment,  whose  interior  I  had 
not  yet  seen.  As  Mr.  Whippleton  was  the  book 
keeper,  and  had  the  general  charge  of  the  finances 
of  the  firm,  I  concluded  that  the  interior  room  was 
appropriated  to  the  use  of  the  dignified  senior 
partner  and  his  father,  the  special  partner,  when 
the  latter  chose  to  honor  the  establishment  with  his 
presence. 

While  I  was  taking  a  deliberate  survey  of  the 
premises  where  I  was  to  pass  at  least  several 
weeks,  two  salesmen,  with  their  memoranda  in 
their  hands,  bustled  into  the  counting-room,  each 
attended  by  a  customer,  to  whom  he  had  sold  a 
bill  of  lumber.  They  had  been  informed  by  Land 
of  the  debut  of  the  new  entry  clerk,  and  they  read 
off  their  sales  to  me,  which  I  entered  upon  the 
book,  giving  them  bills  for  the  purchasers.  One  of 
them  paid  his  bill,  and  I  was  looking  for  the  cash 
book  when  Mr.  Whippleton  made  his  appearance. 

"  So  you  are  really  at  work,  Philip,"  said  he,  as 
he  glanced  at  the  sales  book. 


"  Yes,  sir ;  I  have  made  a  beginning.  I  was 
looking  for  the  cash  book,  sir." 

"  I  keep  the  cash  book  myself,"  added  he,  in  a 
manner  which  indicated  that  I  was  not  to  meddle 
with  it. 

But  I  found  enough  to  do  in  making  bills  and 
charges.  It  was  early  in  the  spring,  and  there 
was  a  great  deal  of  building  in  the  city.  Business 
was  very  driving,  and  I  had  all  I  could  do.  It  was 
the  same  thing  over  and  over  again  all  day  long ; 
but  I  enjoyed  my  occupation  in  spite  of  its  mo 
notony. 

About  nine  o'clock  Mr.  Richard  Collingsby  en 
tered  the  counting-room.  He  passed  my  desk, 
glanced  at  me,  and  entered  the  sacred  precincts  of 
his  sanctorum.  Mr.  Whippleton  immediately  made 
him  a  visit,  and  doubtless  informed  his  senior  that 
he  had  engaged  an  entry  clerk.  I  did  not  see  the 
dignified  partner  again  till  he  left  the  counting- 
room  at  two  o'clock.  He  did  not  even  glance  at 
me  this  time,  and  probably  had  no  suspicion  that 
he  had  ever  seen  me  before.  I  was  too  insignifi 
cant  a  mortal  to  engage  his  attention  even  for  a 
single  instant.  Yet  he  was  my  own  uncle,  though 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  87 

I  might  be  in  the  same  office  with  him  for  years 
without  his  knowing  the  fact. 

At  twelve  o'clock  I  went  to  dinner.  As  I  passed 
through  the  yard,  I  saw  lying  on  the  bank  of  the 
river  a  beautiful  sail-boat,  which  attracted  my  atten 
tion.  It  was  about  thirty  feet  long,  and  had  quite 
a  large  cabin  in  the  forward  part.  I  had  hardly 
ever  seen  a  sail-boat,  and  I  was  much  interested 
in  her. 

"  Whose  is  this  ? "  I  asked,  as  Land  Lirnpedon 
joined  me  on  his  way  to  dinner. 

"  Mr.  Whippleton's ;  he's  a  regular  water  bird, 
and  in  the  summer  he  spends  all  his  spare  time  in 
that  boat." 

"  Does  he  sail  on  this  river  ?  "  I  asked,  glancing 
at  the  muddy  lagoon. 

"  No  ;  he  takes  her  out  on  the  lake,  and  goes  off 
for  a  fortnight  in  her,  when  he  can  spare  the 
time." 

I  had  had  some  experience  with  boats  on  the 
upper  Missouri,  and  had  some  taste  for  them, 
though  I  had  never  even  been  in  a  sail-boat.  I 
hoped  Mr.  Whippleton  would  take  it  into  his  head  to 
invite  me  some  time  to  sail  with  him.  I  went  to 
dinner  with  the  image  of  the  boat's  sharp  bow  and 


88  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

graceful  lines  lingering  in  my  mind.  The  beef 
was  no  tougher  at  noon  than  it  was  in  the  morn' 
ing,  and  I  think  Mrs.  Whippleton  was  convinced 
that  I  was  not  a  profitable  boarder  at  four  dollars 
a  week. 

But  I  do  not  intend  to  weary  rny  reader  by  giv 
ing  the  monotonous  details  of  my  daily  experience 
at  the  desk.  I  discharged  my  duties  faithfully, 
and  to  the  entire  satisfaction  of  Mr.  Whippleton. 
On  the  second  day,  I  saw  Mr.  Collingsby,  senior. 
Like  his  dignified  son,  he  took  no  notice  of  me, 
Possibly  he  asked  my  name  in  the  private  office ; 
but  1  never  knew  whether  it  gave  them  any  un 
easiness  or  not,  though  I  am  very  confident  nei 
ther  of  them  suspected  that  I  was  the  son  of 
Louise  Collingsby.  The  name  was  not  so  uncom 
mon  as  to  indicate  that  I  belonged  to  the  hated 
Farringfords  of  St.  Louis. 

Whatever  may  have  been  said  in  the  private 
office,  nothing  came  to  me  from  either  of  the  men 
in  whom  I  was  so  deeply  interested ;  and  it  often 
occurred  to  me,  as  the  weeks  passed  by,  that  I  was 
doing  nothing  to  accomplish  my  great  mission  in 
Chicago.  My  father  answered  my  letter,  and  ad 
vised  me,  if  I  had  a  good  place,  to  keep  it.  I  wrote 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OP   A    CLERK.  89 

to  him  every  week,  and  received  a  letter  from  him 
as  often. 

The  eight  weeks  for  which  I  had  been  engaged 
passed  off,  and  I  hinted  to  the  junior  partner  that 
my  time  was  out. 

"  Very  well ;  you  can  go  on  just  as  you  have/' 
said  he. 

"  I  don't  care  about  going  on  any  farther  at  six 
dollars  a  week,"  I  replied. 

"  What  do  you  want  ?  " 

"  Eight,  sir." 

"  I  will  speak  to  Mr.  Collingsby." 

He  did  speak  to  him,  and  my  salary  was  ad 
vanced  to  eight  dollars  a  week  for  a  year.  I  was 
satisfied  I  was  earning  that  amount,  and  Mr.  Whip, 
pleton  intimated  that  he  should  require  me  to  do 
more  of  the  general  book-keeping. 


90  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 


CHAPTER    VIII. 

IN   WHICH     PHIL     TAKES    A    SAIL     ON     THE    LAKE   WITH 
ME.    WHIPPLETON. 


,  do  you  know  anything  about  a  boat?" 
asked  Mr.  Whippleton,  one  Saturday  after 
noon,  at  the  close  of  the  month  of  May. 

I  was  standing  on  the  bank  of  the  river,  looking 
at  his  boat,  which  had  been  thoroughly  repaired, 
painted,  and  rigged,  and  lay  off  the  lumber-yard. 
She  was  a  beautiful  craft-,  and  after  we  had  shut 
up  the  counting-room,  I  paused  to  look  at  her. 

''  I  don't  know  anything  about  a  sail-boat,"  I 
replied  :  "  but  T  used  to  handle  a  row-boat  on  the 
upper  Missouri." 

"  You  are  used  to  boats,  then  ?  " 

"  Yes,  to  row-boats." 

•'•If  you  are  not  in  a  hurry,  you  may  go  down 
the  river  with  mo  :  and  I  intend  to  take  a  little 
turn  out  in  the  lake,"  lie  continued,  as  he  hauled 
the  sail-boat  up  to  the  shore. 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  91 

"  Thank  you,  sir ;  I  should  like  to  go  very 
much/'  I  replied. 

The  craft  was  called  the  Fiorina,  though  why 
she  had  what  seemed  to  rne  such  an  odd  name,  I 
did  not  know  at  that  time.  I  afterwards  ascer 
tained  that  he  was  engaged  to  a  young  lady  who 
bore  that  interesting  name,  though,  for  reasons 
which  will  appear  in  the  sequel,  he  never  married 
her.  I  was  delighted  with  the  boat  when  I  went 
on  board  of  her,  and  glanced  into  her  comfortable 
cabin,  which  was  furnished  like  a  parlor.  He  had 
evidently  spent  a  good  deal  of  money  upon  her, 
and  I  soon  found  that  Miss  Fiorina  was  an  occa 
sional  guest  on  board. 

She  was  sloop-rigged,  and  carried  a  large  jib 
and  mainsail.  Everything  about  her  was  fitted  up 
in  good  style ;  indeed,  the  carpenters,  riggers,  and 
painters  had  been  at  work  upon  her  for  a  month. 
I  was  rather  sorry,  as  I  looked  at  her,  that  I  was 
not  a  rich  man,  able  to  own  just  such  a  craft,  for  I 
could  conceive  of  nothing  more  pleasant  than 
coasting  up  and  down  the  lake,  exploring  the  riv 
ers,  bays,  and  islands.  I  thought  I  could  live  six 
months  in  the  year  on  board  of  the  Fiorina  very 
comfortably.  But,  then,  I  was  not  a  rich  man ; 


92 


and  I  had  a  great  work  before  me,  with  no  time  to 
waste  in  mere  amusements. 

"  Now  take  off  those  stops,  Phil." 

"  Stops  ?  " 

"  Those  canvas  straps  with  which  the  mainsail 
is  tied  up/'  he  explained. 

I  concluded  that  the  mainsail  was  the  big  sail 
nearest  to  me,  and  I  untied  the  "  stops,"  making  a 
note  of  the  name  for  future  use. 

u  That's  it ;  now  stand  by  the  jib  halyards," 
added  Mr.  Whippleton. 

"  I'll  stand  by  7em  till  doomsday,  if  you  will  only 
tell  me  what  they  are." 

"  I  call  things  by  their  names  in  order  that  you 
may  learn  them/'  laughed  the  junior  partner,  as  he 
went  forward  and  cast  off  the  ropes  indicated, 
which  were  fastened  to  a  couple  of  cleats  on  the 
mast.  "  One  is  the  throat,  and  the  other  is  the 
peak-halyard." 

We  hoisted  the  sail,  and  I  observed  the  use  of 
the  halyards,  and  how  to  manage  and  make  them 
fast.  I  was  confident  that  I  should  not  have  to  be 
shown  a  second  time  how  to  do  anything.  Fortu 
nately  there  are  so  few  ropes  on  an  ordinary  sloop 
that  my  weak  head  could  carry  the  names  and 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF    A    CLERK.  93 

uses  of  all  without  confusion.  There  was  not 
much  wind  up  there  in  the  lagoon,  or  the  river,  as 
it  is  more  politely  called  ;  but  what  there  was 
came  from  the  westward,  and  the  skipper  said  it 
was  fair  to  take  us  down  to  the  lake. 

"  Cast  off  the  painter/'  continued  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton. 

"Who?" 

"  The  painter." 

"  He's  not  here  ;  and  if  he  was,  I  shouldn't  like 
to  cast  him  off  here,  where  the  water  is  so  dirty ; 
I  would  rather  wait  till  we  come  to  a  cleaner 
place,"  I  replied. 

"  That  rope  by  which  the  boat  is  fastened  to  the 
wharf  is  called  a  painter,"  added  the  skipper. 

"  0,  is  it?"  I  replied,  unfastening  the  rope  at 
the  shore  end,  and  pulling  it  on  board. 

"  That's  it.  You  will  be  as  salt  as  a  boiled  lob 
ster  one  of  these  days,  Phil." 

I  thanked  him  for  the  compliment,  as  I  supposed 
it  to  be,  though  I  had  not  the  least  idea  what  a 
lobster  was.  The  skipper  took  the  helm,  and  the 
boat  began  to  move. 

"  Haul  in  that  sheet,  Phil,"  said  he,  quietly. 


94 


I  rushed  for  the  cabin,  where  I  had  seen  two 
beds  very  neatly  made  up  in  the  berths. 

"  Where  are  you  going  ?  " 

"  After  the  sheet.  There's  some  on  the  beds  in 
the  cabin." 

"  The  rope  fastened  to  the  boom/'  he  continued, 
laughing  at  my  blunder,  and  handing  me  the  end 
of  the  line  upon  which  I  was  to  haul. 

I  pulled  in,  and  the  effect  was  to  bring  the 
boom  over  the  deck.  Putting  the  helm  hard 
down,  he  brought  the  Fiorina  up  into  the  wind,  so 
as  to  clear  a  lumber  schooner  which  lay  just  be 
low.  I  wish  to  say  that  I  describe  the  movements 
of  the  boat  from  the  knowledge  I  have  since  ob 
tained,  for  I  am  an  "  old  salt "  now.  I  watched 
the  operations  of  the  skipper  with  keen  attention, 
for  I  was  taking  my  first  lesson  in  handling  a  boat, 
and  I  was  deeply  interested.  Skilfully  he  navi 
gated  the  crowded  river,  and  I  hauled  in  and  let 
out  the  sheet  twenty  times  before  we  reached  the 
broad  lake.  The  drawbridges  were  whisked  open 
in  the  twinkling  of  an  eye,  and  in  about  half  an 
hour  we  passed  out  of  the  river. 

I  saw  why  Mr.  Whippleton  was  anxious  to  have 
an  assistant  in  the  Fiorina  with  him,  for  I  found 


THE   CATASTROPHES   OF   A    CLERK.  95 

it  was  no  joke  to  haul  the  sheet,  and  my  hands, 
grown  tender  in  my  clerkly  occupation,  exhibited 
two  or  three  blisters  when  we  reached  the  mouth 
of  the  river.  It  was  a  nice  thing  for  a  gentleman 
like  him  to  sit  at  the  helm,  and  handle  the  tiller ; 
but  I  fancied  he  did  not  enjoy  hoisting  the  main 
sail,  and  hauling  the  sheet,  alone. 

"  There,  Phil,  the  worst  of  it  is  over  now,"  said 
Mr.  Whippleton,  as  he  headed  the  boat  down  the 
lake.  "  We  are  out  of  the  river,  and  we  have 
plenty  of  sea  room  here.  You  may  clear  away 
the  jib." 

I  had  already  learned  what  the  jib  was,  and  I 
went  out  on  the  bowsprit,  as  I  had  seen  the  men 
do  on  other  vessels.  I  loosed  the  sail,  and  hoisted 
it.  The  jib-sheets  led  aft  to  the  standing-room; 
and,  as  soon  as  I  had  made  fast  the  halyard,  the 
skipper  luffed  up  and  fastened  down  the  jib.  The 
boat  heeled  over,  and  began  to  cut  through  the 
w^ater  at  a  very  exciting  rate.  It  was  a  very 
pleasing  and  delightful  sensation  to  me,  and  from 
that  moment  I  became  a  sailor  in  my  aspirations. 
I  had  never  seen  the  salt  water,  and  had  a  very 
indefinite  idea  of  the  expanse  of  ocean. 


96  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

u  How  do  you  like  it,  Phil  ?  "  asked  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton. 

u  Very  much,  sir." 

"  I'm  glad  you  do,  for  I  want  some  one  to  sail 
with  me.  This  boat  is  rather  large  to  be  handled 
comfortably  by  one  man,  and  two  make  it  a  pleas 
ant  thing  for  both  of  them.  Sit  down  here,  and 
make  yourself  happy,"  he  added,  pointing  to  the 
cushioned  seat  at  his  side. 

I  accepted  his  polite  invitation,  and  thought  he 
was  very  considerate  to  me,  his  humble  clerk. 
He  then  explained  my  duty  in  tacking  or  coming 
about,  which  was  to  let  go  the  jib-sheet  on  the  lee 
side,  when  the  sail  shook,  and  haul  in  on  the 
weather  side.  To  illustrate  the  point,  he  made  a 
tack  and  ran  in  towards  the  shore.  I  readily  un 
derstood  the  whole  matter,  and  by  this  time  I  felt 
that  I  could  sail  the  Fiorina  myself. 

"  Phil,  you  break  in  as  a  book-keeper  a  great 
deal  better  than  I  expected  you  would,"  said  Mr. 
Whippleton,  when  he  had  tacked  again,  and  was 
standing  along  the  shore  with  the  wind  on  the 
beam. 

"  I  have  taken  an  interest  in  the  subject,  and 
studied  it  very  attentively.  My  father,  svho 


THE   CATASTROPHES    OF   A    CLERK.  97 

served  his  time  at  the  desk,  gave  me  a  great 
deal  of  instruction." 

"Who  is  your  father?" 

"  He  was  formerly  a  merchant,  but  now  he  is 
the  agent  of  a  wealthy  real-estate  owner." 

"  He  instructed  you  very  well.  Has  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby  said  anything  to  you  lately  about  your 
duties  ?  " 

u  No,  sir ;  he  has  hardly  spoken  to  me  since  I 
have  been  in  the  counting-room ;  never,  except  to 
ask  me  a  question,"  I  replied. 

"  He  does  not  say  much  to  any  one ;  but  he  is 
well  pleased  with  your  work,  and  spoke  of  the 
neat  appearance  of  your  books  to-day." 

"  I  am  certainly  very  much  obliged  to  him,"  I 
added,  delighted  with  this  testimony ;  for  I  felt 
that  it  was  the  first  point  I  had  gained  towards 
the  discharge  of  my  great  mission. 

"  He  says  you  write  very  handsomely  and  very 
plainly ;  that  your  footings  and  extensions  are 
uniformly  correct." 

"  I  try  to  have  everything  right  and  neat,"  I 
answered,  delighted  beyond  measure  at  this  kind 
opinion  of  me. 

"  I  took  occasion,  while  the  subject  was  warm, 
7 


98  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

to  mention  a  matter  of  which  I  have  been  think 
ing  lately/'  continued  Mr.  Whippleton.  "  I  have 
a  great  deal  of  out-door  business  to  do,  and  the 
entire  charge  of  the  books  is  too  much  for  me. 
We  are  going  to  have  another  entry  clerk,  and 
you  will  hereafter  be  the  assistant  book-keeper." 

I  was  very  much  obliged  to  him  for  this  new 
mark  of  confidence.  He  explained  that  he  did 
not  intend  to  give  me  the  entire  charge  of  the 
books  yet,  but  that  I  should  do  the  posting  and 
keep  the  cash  book  ;  or  rather,  that  I  should  assist 
him  in  doing  these  things.  He  wished  me  to  look 
into  the  system  of  book-keeping  the  firm  had 
adopted,  and  prepare  myself  to  keep  the  books  in 
the  course  of  a  year.  I  promised  to  be  diligent 
and  attentive,  but  I  assured  him  that  I  already 
understood  the  method. 

"  Between  us  both,  when  we  have  another 
entry  clerk,  we  shall  have  a  little  more  time  for 
sailing/7  he  added.  "  If  we  can  get  away  at  three 
or  four  in  the  afternoon,  we  shall  have  some  jolly 
cruises,  for  we  can  make  an  easy  thing  of  it  in  the 
boat  as  well  as  at  the  desk." 

"  How  far  can  you  go  in  this  boat  ?  "  I  asked,  as 


THE   CATASTROPHES  CF   A   CLERK.  99 

I  glanced  at  the  broad  expanse  of  waters  to  the 
north  arid  east  of  us. 

"  How  far  ?  As  far  as  you  please.  A  thousand 
miles.  You  can  go  to  the  head  of  Lake  Superior, 
or  through  Lake  Huron  to  the  foot  of  Lake  Erie." 

"Not  in  this  boat." 

"Why  not?" 

"  Because  she  isn't  large  enough." 

"  Yes,  she  is.  Her  cabin  is  large  enough  for 
two  to  sleep  in  •  and  there  is  a  cook-stove  forward, 
where  you  can  get  up  as  good  a  dinner  as  they 
have  at  the  Tremont  House." 

"  But  there  are  violent  storms  on  the  lakes,  I 
have  read." 

"  So  there  are  ;  but  the  Fiorina  will  stand  al 
most  anything  in  the  shape  of  a  blow.  All  you 
have  to  do  is  to  reef,  and  let  her  go  it.  But  you 
can  always  tell  when  it  is  going  to  be  bad 
weather,  and  you  can  make  a  harbor.  With  a 
boat  of  this  size  you  can  run  into  any  creek  or 
river,  anchor,  and  eat  and  sleep  till  it  is  fair 
weather  again.  I  always  keep  within  a  few  miles 
of  the  shore,  on  a  long  cruise.  If  I  can  get  away 
for  two  or  three  weeks  this  summer,  I  intend  to 


100  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

make  a  voyage  up  to  the  strait,  and  down  on  the 
other  side  of  the  lake." 

"  I  should  like  to  go  with  you  first  rate." 

"  My  friend  Waterford,  who  has  made  his  for 
tune  by  speculating  in  lands,  keeps  a  boat  just 
like  the  Fiorina ;  and  last  summer  he  went  to  De 
troit  and  back  in  her." 

The  picture  he  drew  of  life  on  the  lake  pleased 
me  exceedingly,  and  I  could  not  but  sigh  when  I 
thought  that  such  amusements  were  only  for  rich 
men.  A  poor  boy,  like  me,  had  no  right  to  think 
of  them.  Mr.  Whippleton  had  come  about,  and  at 
dark  we  were  at  the  mouth  of  Chicago  River 
again.  I  took  in  the  jib,  and  he  moored  the  boat 
near  the  lake.  When  we  had  put  everything  in 
order,  he  invited  me  to  sail  with  him  the  next  day. 

"  To-morrow  will  be  Sunday,"  I  suggested. 

"  What  of  it?  The  Fiorina  sails  just  as  well  on 
Sunday  as  on  any  other  day." 

"  I  would  rather  not  sail  on  Sunday.  I  want  to 
go  to  church  and  to  Sunday  school." 

"I  didn't  think  that  of  you,"  replied  the  skip 
per,  contemptuously.  "  I  always  sail  Sundays, 
and  I  expect  to  race  with  Waterfo  d  to-morrow." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      101 

"  I  hope  you  will  excuse  me,  sir ;  I  would  rather 
not  go." 

I  saw  that  he  was  disgusted  with  me,  but  I 
could  not  yield  this  point.  I  went  home,  feeling 
that  I  had  offended  my  employer,  who  evidently 
wished  me  to  assist  him  in  handling  the  boat. 


102  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OB 


CHAPTER   IX. 

IN   WHICH    PHIL    ATTEMPTS    TO    MAKE    OUT    A    TRIAL 
BALANCE. 

I  WENT  to  church  and  to  Sunday  school  as 
usual  the  next  day ;  and  I  knew  that  I  felt 
better  than  I  should  have  done  on  board  of  the 
Fiorina.  The  next  day,  however,  when  I  met 
Mr.  Whippleton  in  the  counting-room,  lie  seemed 
to  h?ve  laid  up  no  grudge  against  me:  on  the 
contrary,  I  thought  he  was  rather  more  pleas 
ant  and  considerate  than  usual;  but  perhaps  his 
conduct  was  only  in  contrast  with  what  I  had 
expected. 

On  Thursday  morning,  Bob  Murray,  the  new 
entry  clerk,  appeared,  and  I  spent  the  forenoon 
in  initiating  him  into  the  mysteries  of  his  duty. 
In  the  afternoon  I  commenced  posting,  for  Mr. 
Whippleton  had  been  so  busy  with  his  boat,  and 
with  his  other  out-door  occupations,  that  the 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      103 

books  were  somewhat  behindhand.  While  I  was 
thus  engaged,  I  obeyed  the  instructions  of  the 
junior  partner,  and  examined  carefully  into  the 
system  by  which  the  accounts  were  kept.  I  be 
gan  early  in  the  morning  and  worked  till  late  at 
night,  until  I  had  posted  everything  down  to  the 
Saturday  of  the  preceding  week.  Then  I  had 
no  difficulty  in  keeping  the  work  up. 

Mr.  Whippleton  was  away  now  a  large  portion 
of  the  time.  I  knew  that  he  was  engaged  to 
some  extent  in  real  estate  speculations,  and  he 
hinted  to  me  that  these  operations  occupied  a 
considerable  portion  of  his  time.  He  had  simply 
directed  me  to  post  the  books,  but  having  mas 
tered  the  system,  I  was  disposed  to  show  him 
that  I  was  competent  to  keep  the  books  alone. 
I  footed  up  the  columns  of  the  invoice  and 
sales  books,  and  I  intended  to  surprise  him,  at 
the  end  of  the  month,  by  showing  him  a  trial 
balance  and  a  statement  of  results.  I  thought 
I  could  do  this,  and  it  would  be  a  feather  in 
my  cap  if  I  succeeded.  It  would  not  only  be 
good  practice  for  me,  but  it  would  show  the 
exact  condition  of  the  business. 

While    I  was  at  work  on  the  invoice  book,  I 


104  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OB 

found  what  appeared  to  me  to  be  an  error.  The 
invoices,  or  bills  of  lumber  purchased  by  the 
firm,  wore  all  carefully  filed  away.  On  refer 
ring  to  the  original  document,  I  found  it  footed 
up  five  instead  of  fifteen  thousand  dollars.  I 
turned  to  the  cash  book,  and  found  that  fifteen 
thousand  dollars  had  been  paid  on  account  of 
this  transaction,  and  I  concluded  that  there  must 
be  another  bill.  I  could  find  no  other.  The  pur 
chase  had  been  made  while  I  was  in  the  office, 
and  I  remembered  the  bill. 

I  decided  to  examine  all  the  invoices  from 
the  first  day  of  the  year,  and  compare  them 
with  the  entries  in  the  book,  which  had  been 
transferred  to  the  ledger.  I  discovered  four 
other  entries  for  which  there  were  no  invoices 
at  all.  In  other  words,  there  was  merchandise 
to  the  amount  of  about  thirty-five  thousand  dul- 
lars  of  which  I  could  obtain  no  knowledge  what 
ever.  However,  I  went  on  with  my  trial  bal 
ance,  and  the  result,  when  I  had  completed  it,  was 
startling  to  me.  My  statement  showed  that  the 
firm  had  lost  over  ten  thousand  dollars  in  five 
months,  taking  the  stock  on  hand  at  cost  and 
considering  all  debts  good. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      105 

The  head  salesman  kept  what  he  called  a 
"  lumber  book."  The  fir^t  entry  in  it  was  the 
amount  of  stock  on  hand  at  the  beginning  of 
the  year.  To  this  was  added  all  lumber  bought, 
and  from  it  all  sales  were  deducted,  so  that  the 
book  showed  the  amount  of  lumber  of  each  kind 
on  hand.  This  he  did  so  as  to  be  able  at  all 
times  to  report  what  new  stock  was  needed,  and 
then  Mr.  Whippleton  ordered  it.  As  there  was 
not  a  great  variety  of  merchandise,  the  keeping 
of  this  book  did  not  demand  much  labor,  each 
salesman  being  required  to  deduct  his  sales 
from  the  gross  amounts. 

None  of  the  invoices  which  were  missing  had 
been  entered  in  this  book.  It  appeared,  there 
fore,  that  the  firm  had  thirty  thousand  dollars 
worth  of  stock  on  hand  more  than  was  exhib 
ited  by  the  lumber  book.  I  did  not  understand 
it,  and  I  came  to  the  conclusion  that  I  did  not 
know  half  so  much  about  book-keeping  as  I  had 
flattered  myself  I  did.  Still  my  accounts  all 
"  proved,"  and  though  I  worked  over  this  prob 
lem  every  evening  till  midnight,  I  could  not 
arrive  at  any  different  result. 

I    was   amazed,   and    even   vexed.      I    did   not 


106  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

like  to  say  anything  to  Mr.  Whippleton,  because 
I  wished  to  surprise  him  with  iny  knowledge  of 
accounts  on  the  first  of  the  month.  It  would 
astonish  him  to  learn  that  the  firm  had  lost  over 
ten  thousand  dollars  in  five  months,  several  of 
them  the  best  in  the  year  for  business.  I  came 
to  the  conclusion  that  my  laudable  design  would 
be  a  failure,  or  only  prove  that  I  was  a  vain  and 
conceited  boy,  who  knew  but  little  of  the  science 
of  accounts.  I  did  not  suspect  that  anything 
was  wrong,  except  in  my  own  calculations.  Prob 
ably  Mr.  Whippleton  knew  all  about  the  matter, 
and  in  due  time  would  set  it  right,  showing  that 
the  concern  had  made  twenty  or  thirty  thousand 
dollars  in  five  months,  instead  of  losing  ten 
thousand. 

"Is  Mr.  Whippleton  in?"  asked  a  gentleman, 
one  day,  while  I  was  harassing  my  brain  over 
the  knotty  problem. 

u  No,  sir/'  I  replied.  "  He  went  out  at  ten 
o'clock,  and  I  have  not  seen  him  since. 

"  Sorry ;   I  wanted  to  see  him." 

I  soon  found  that  this  gentleman  was  the  agent 
of  the  Michigan  Pine  Company,  in  whose  invoice 
the  discrepancy  of  ten  thousand  dollars  appeared. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       107 

Without  indicating  my  purpose,  I  made  such 
inquiries  of  him  as  enabled  him  to  give  the  in 
formation  I  wanted.  I  was  satisfied  that  the 
invoice  on  file  was  correct,  and  that  no  lumber 
had  been  purchased  for  which  the  firm  had  not 
received  a  bill. 

Of  course  this  discovery  only  added  to  my  per 
plexity,  and  I  worked  half  a  day  over  the  head 
salesman's  lumber  book ;  but  I  finished  the  in 
vestigation  no  wiser  than  I  had  begun  it.  On 
the  cash  book  it  appeared  that  the  amount  of 
the  actual  bill  had  been  paid  at  one  time,  and 
the  ten  thousand  dollars  at  another.  I  give  the 
amount  in  round  numbers,  though  it  varied  some 
what  from  these  figures.  I  worried  myself  over 
the  matter  till  I  was  afraid  it  would  make  me 
sick,  and  then  I  gave  it  up  in  despair.  The  first 
day  of  the  month  came,  and  when  I  added  the 
month's  business  to  my  trial  balance,  I  found 
another  amount  of  five  thousand  dollars  unex 
plained  by  any  invoice.  The  balance  against 
the  firm  remained  about  the  same.  Mortified 
at  my  defeat,  I  decided  to  show  my  statement 
to  Mr.  Whippleton,  for  I  was  deeply  interested 
to  know  where  "  the  figures  lied." 


108  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  What's  that  ? "  demanded  the  junior  partner, 
as  I  laid  rny  balance  sheet  and  statement  before 
him. 

"  I  have  made  out  a  trial  balance  and  statement, 
sir/'  I  replied. 

"  Who  told  you  to  do  that  ?  "  he  asked,  with  a 
glance  at  the  sanctum  of  Mr.  Collingsby. 

"  No  one,  sir." 

"  What  do  you  mean  by  wasting  your  time  in 
that  way  ?  " 

"  You  told  me  to  look  into  the  system  of  keeping 
the  books,  and  I  thought  I  could  not  do  it  any  bet 
ter  than  by  getting  out  a  trial  balance  for  the  last 
six  months." 

"  We  don't  take  a  trial  balance  but  once  a  year." 

"  I  only  did  it  for  practice,  so  that  I  might  un 
derstand  it  better  when  1  had  to  do  the  real  thing." 

"  I  don't  care  about  your  overhauling  the 
books  to  that  extent  without  my  knowledge," 
added  Mr.  Whippleton,  looking  very  much  dis 
pleased. 

I  began  to  think  I  had  sailed  my  last  sail  in  the 
Fiorina ;  but  as  I  had  kept  the  books  up  square,  I 
did  not  feel  that  I  had  done  anything  to  incur  his 
displeasure. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.       109 

"  I  only  did  it  for  practice,  sir/7  I  repeated,  in 
excuse  for  my  wicked  conduct. 

"Did  Mr.  Collingsby  tell  you  to  do  that?" 

"  Xo,  sir ;  lie  never  said  a  word  to  me  about  it." 

"  Have  you  shown  it  to  him  ?  " 

"No  sir;  of  course  not.  There  is  something 
wrong  about  it.  You  understand  these  things  so 
well,  that  I  suppose  you  can  tell  me  at  a  glance 
just  what  the  matter  is." 

"  Perhaps  I  can,"  he  added,  glancing  at  my 
sheets.  "  What's  the  matter  with  it?" 

"  I  make  it  out  that  the  concern  has  lost  about 
ten  thousand  dollars  in  the  last  six  months'  busi 
ness.  Of  course  that  can't  bo  so." 

"  Certainly  not ;  and  that  shows  the  folly  of  boys 
like  you  meddling  with  what  you  don't  under 
stand,"  said  he,  sourly,  and  in  a  more  crabbed  tone 
than  he  had  ever  before  used  to  me. 

I  had  expected  to  be  commended  for  the  zeal  I 
had  shown  in  my  efforts  to  master  the  details  of  the 
business,  instead  of  which  I  found  myself  sharply 
reproved.  I  had  made  a  failure  of  my  purpose  to 
get  out  a  correct  trial  balance,  and  this  was  suffi 
ciently  mortifying  without  the  reproach  the  junior 
partner  cast  upon  me.  I  hung  my  head  with 


110 


shame  while  he  glanced  over  the  trial  balance, 
which,  according  to  my  father's  system,  included 
the  balance  sheet.  I  supposed  his  practised  eye 
would  promptly  detect  my  error. 

"  What's  the  matter  with  it  ?  "  said  he,  petulantly. 

"  There  is  something  about  the  invoices  that  I 
don't  understand ;  but  I  suppose  it  must  be  be 
cause  I  am  so  thick-headed,"  I  replied,  with  becom 
ing  humility. 

"  With  the  invoices  ?  "  added  he,  with  a  kind  of 
gasp  which  attracted  my  attention. 

I  glanced  at  him,  and  I  observed  that  his  face  was 
deadly  pale.  His  lip  quivered,  and  he  appeared  to 
be  very  much  agitated.  I  was  astonished  at  this 
exhibition  on  his  part,  and  while  I  was  considering 
whether  he  was  angry  with  me  or  not,  he  walked 
away  and  drank  a  glass  of  ice  water  at  the  table. 
I  had  seen  him  turn  very  pale  when  he  was  angry, 
and  I  was  afraid  I  had  mortally  offended  him  by 
my  innocent  zeal. 

"  What's  the  matter  with  the  invoices,  Phil?  "  he 
asked,  returning  to  the  desk  with  a  sickly  smile 
upon  his  pallid  face. 

"  I  don't  know  that  anything  is  the  matter  with 
them,  sir.  I  suppose  I  have  made  a  blunder,"  I 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      Ill 

replied,  stammering  with  confusion,  for  the  situa 
tion  was  entirely  new  to  me.  "  The  May  invoice 
of  the  Michigan  Pine  Company  foots  up  on  the 
book  about  fifteen  thousand  dollars,  but  the  bill  on 
file  shows  only  five." 

"  You  have  made  a  silly  blunder,  Phil,"  laughed 
he  ;  but  still  his  lip  quivered. 

u  I  supposed  I  had,  sir ;  and  I  only  wanted  to 
know  where  my  mistake  was." 

"  There  is  only  one  little  trouble  with  you,  Phil. 
You  think  you  know  a  great  deal  more  than  you  do 
know." 

"  I  suppose  you  are  right,  sir.  I  thought  I  knew 
how  to  make  out  a  trial  balance  and  balance  sheet ; 
but  I  find  I  don't,  though  I  have  done  it  a  dozen 
times  under  my  father's  direction." 

"  These  make-believe  accounts  are  not  like  real 
ones,"  added  Mr.  Whippleton,  sagely. 

"  1  see  they  are  not." 

"  I  suppose  you  read  a  check  mark,  or  something 
of  that  kind,  for  a  one,  in  the  invoice  book." 

"  I  should  suppose  so  myself,  sir,  if  the  cash  book 
and  check  book  did  not  both  show  that  the  fifteen 
thousand  dollars  was  paid  to  the  Michigan  Pine 
Company." 


112  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OB 

"Is  that  so?"  said  he,  startled  again.  "I  must 
have  left  those  invoices  at  my  room.  I  had  them 
there  one  evening." 

"  Perhaps  you  have  some  others  there/'  I  sug 
gested  quietly,  in  my  ignorance  ;  "  for  the  invoice 
book  shows  about  forty  thousand  dollars'  worth  of 
lumber  for  which  there  are  no  bills." 

"  They  must  be  at  my  room ;  I  will  bring  them 
down,"  he  added,  turning  away  from  me. 

"  They  were  not  entered  in  the  lumber  book 
either,"  I  added ;  "  so,  I  suppose,  if  I  add  forty 
thousand  dollars  to  the  stock  item  it  will  come  out 
right." 

Mr.  Whippleton  had  dropped  into  a  chair,  and 
looked  paler  than  ever. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      113 


CHAPTER  X. 

IN  WHICH    PHIL   IS    PERPLEXED   ABOUT    CERTAIN  IN 
VOICES. 

"  "Y~TTHAT'S  the  matter,  sir?  Are  you  sick?" 
f  T  I  asked,  startled  by  the  deadly  pallor  on 
the  cheeks  and  lips  of  the  junior  partner. 

"  I  don't  feel  very  well,  but  I  shall  be  better  in 
a  moment/7  he  replied,  faintly. 

"What  shall  I  do  for  you?" 

"  Nothing,  Phil ;  I  feel  better  now.  I'm  subject 
to  these  ill  turns  in  the  summer.  I  shall  be  all 
right  in  a  few  minutes.  I'll  bring  down  those  in 
voices  to-morrow.  I  bought  my  boat  last  year, 
hoping  to  cure  myself  of  them  by  using  exercise 
in  the  fresh  air." 

I  waited  a  few  minutes,  and  he  recovered  in  a 
great  measure  from  the  sudden  attack;  but  he 
was  still  pale,  and  appeared  to  be  very  nervous. 

"  The  doctor  told  me  if  I  attended  to  business  so 
8 


114  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

closely,  I  should  break  down  altogether,"  he  con 
tinued,  rising  from  his  chair. 

"  Well,  sir,  I  hope  you  will  take  a  vacation, 
then,"  I  answered,  full  of  sympathy. 

"  I  can't  do  it ;  that's  the  trouble.  I  hoped  I 
should  be  able  to  take  my  trip  round  the  lake  this 
summer,  but  I  don't  see  how  I  can  do  it.  I  have 
to  do  all  the  buying  for  the  concern,  and  attend  to 
all  the  finances.  Mr.  Collingsby,  you  know,  really 
does  nothing.  The  whole  establishment  rests  on 
my  shoulders,  and  I  find  I  am  yielding  under  the 
heavy  load." 

"  I  hope  I  shall  soon  be  able  to  do  more  to  help 
you,"  I  replied. 

It  had  occurred  to  me  that  the  concern  had  been 
running  itself  for  several  weeks,  for  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton  had  not  been  in  the  office  half  the  time.  I 
supposed,  therefore,  from  what  he  said,  that  he 
was  buying  lumber,  or  attending  to  the  finances 
of  the  establishment,  in  his  absence,  for  he  ap 
peared  to  have  injured  his  health  very  seriously. 
From  "  the  speech  of  people,"  and  from  an  occa 
sional  remark  he  dropped  himself,  I  had  learned 
that  he  was  engaged  in  land  speculations,  but  I 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      115 

was  not  willing  to  believe  that  these  could  add 
very  much  to  his  work. 

"  You  have  done  very  well,  Phil,"  said  he, 
kindly.  "  You  have  been  faithful,  and  you  have 
kept  your  books  remarkably  well ;  but  taking  a 
trial  balance  isn't  your  forte  yet." 

"  I  know  I'm  stupid,  sir." 

"  Far  from  it,  Phil.  I  never  knew  a  young  man 
of  your  age  who  had  so  deep  an  insight  into  the 
science  of  accounts  as  you  have  ;  but  you  can't  do 
everything  at  once." 

"  Thank  you,  sir ;  you  are  very  kind.  Perhaps 
the  taking  of  trial  balances  is  not  my  forte ;  but  it 
seems  to  me  that  those  invoices,  when  you  bring 
them,  will  make  it  all  right.  Forty  thousand  dol- 
lors  added  to  the  stock  will  leave  a  balance  of 
thirty  thousand  in  favor  of  the  concern." 

"  Yery  likely  you  are  right,  after  all,  Phil.  In 
deed,  I  think  you  must  be.  You  are  always  cor 
rect  about  everything." 

"  0,  no,  sir ;  I  don't  pretend  to  be  always  cor 
rect,  but  I  try  to  be  so,"  I  replied,  blushing  at  the 
compliments  showered  upon  me. 

"  But,  Phil,  you  should  not  attempt  to  do  what 
you  don't  understand." 


116  DESK    AND   DEBIT,    OB 

"  I  thought  I  was  perfectly  competent  to  make 
out  a  trial  balance,  sir." 

"  Undoubtedly  you  are.  It  isn't  that/'  he  inter 
posed,  with  a  pleasant  smile.  "  There  are  certain 
details  of  the  business  which  you  don't  under 
stand,  and  you  can't  make  out  a  correct  trial 
balance  without  including  those  details." 

"  I  supposed  I  understood  all  about  the  busi 
ness,  and  perhaps  it  would  have  come  out  all  right 
if  I  had  only  had  those  invoices." 

"  I  don't  know  how  that  might  have  been.  But 
suppose  Mr.  Collingsby  had  seen  your  statement, 
that  the  firm  had  lost  ten  thousand  dollars  in  six 
months." 

"  I  did  not  intend  to  show  it  to  him." 

"  Still  he  might  have  seen  it.  You  might  have 
left  it  on  the  desk,  and  a  single  glance  at  it  would 
have  alarmed  him,  when,  you  can  see  for  yourself, 
the  business  is  paying  a  large  profit." 

"I  made  the  statement  only  for  you,  and  I 
showed  it  to  you  in  order  to  have  rny  blunder 
pointed  out." 

"  You  did  perfectly  right,  Phil,  but  an  accident 
might  have  happened,"  said  he,  walking  to  the 
desk  where  my  sheets  were  still  lying. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      117 

He  picked  them  up,  tore  them  into  a  great 
many  pieces,  and  threw  them  into  the  waste 
basket. 

"  At  the  end  of  the  year  we  will  make  out  a 
trial  balance  together,"  he  added. 

I  did  not  like  to  see  the  result  of  so  much  hard 
labor  destroyed;  especially  as,  by  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton's  own  showing,  the  figures  would  be  correct 
when  he  produced  the  missing  invoices.  But  I 
had  my  rough  draft,  which  I  had  carefully  copied, 
in  the  desk,  and  I  intended  to  carry  this  home,  io 
order  to  ascertain  at  some  future  time  whether  my 
figures  were  correct  or  not.  When  I  obtained  the 
invoices  I  could  tell  whether  I  had  made  a  fail 
ure  or  not  in  the  act  of  taking  a  trial  balance.  I 
was  not  satisfied  that  I  was  so  utterly  stupid  aa 
my  employer  made  me  out  to  be. 

"  Those  bills  ought  to  have  been  entered  OD 
the  lumber  book,''  said  I,  when  the  junior  partner 
had  disposed  of  my  papers. 

"  That's  of  no  consequence  at  all.  The  lumber 
book  is  a  humbug,'7  he  replied ;  "  I  don't  believe 
in  it;  indeed,  I  had  even  forgotten  that  there 
was  any  such  book.  The  firm  don't  recognize  it, 


118  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

and  I  think  it  is  liable  to  lead  us  all  into  blunders 
and  errors,  as  it  has  you." 

He  went  to  the  other  side  of  the  desk,  where 
the  objectionable  volume  lay,  turned  over  its 
leaves,  and  glanced  at  its  pages.  He  was  still 
very  nervous,  for  the  effects  of  his  sudden  attack 
of  illness  appeared  not  to  have  left  him. 

"  No  reliance  whatever  can  be  placed  on  this 
book,  and  I  am  disposed  to  destroy  it." 

"  I  thought  it  was  a  very  good  thing.  Faxon 
uses  it  a  great  deal,  and  says  he  can  tell  what 
stock  he  has  on  hand,  when  a  customer  comes, 
without  going  out  of  the  counting-room." 

"  It  is  not  reliable.  The  only  way  to  know 
what  stock  we  have  is  by  looking  it  over." 

Very  likely  he  would  have  destroyed  it  if  Mr. 
Collingsby  had  not  called  him  into  the  private 
counting-room  at  this  moment.  He  evidently  had 
a  hearty  grudge  against  the  book,  which  I 
thought  was  entirely  groundless. 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  don't  think  much  of  your 
lumber  book,"  said  I,  when  the  head  salesman 
came  in  a  moment  later. 

"Why,  what's  the  matter  with  it?"  asked  the 
man. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      119 

"He  says  it  is  not  reliable." 

"  I  think  it  is ;  and  since  I  adopted  it,  two  or 
three  other  concerns  have  kept  one  like  it,  after 
asking  me  about  it.  What's  the  reason  it  isn't 
reliable  ?  " 

"  You  may  neglect  to  enter  invoices  or  sales." 

"  Your  ledger  wouldn't  be  good  for  anything 
if  you  neglected  to  carry  all  your  items  to  its 
pages." 

I  was  about  to  specify  more  particularly  that 
the  firm  had  about  forty  thousand  dollars'  worth  of 
stock  on  hand  more  than  appeared  in  the  lumber 
book,  when  Mr.  Whippleton  returned.  He  ev 
idently  understood  what  I  was  doing,  and  told  me 
to  make  up  the  bank  account. 

"  You  needn't  say  anything  to  Faxon  about  his 
book.  Let  him  keep  it,  if  he  wishes  to  do  so," 
said  he. 

"I  did  say  something  to  him." 

"You  did?     What  did  you  say?" 

".I  only  told  him  you  didn't  think  his  book  was 
reliable." 

"  That's  no  more  than  the  truth,  but  you  need 
not  mention  the  matter  again.  It  will  only  make 


120 

unpleasant  feeling.  Smooth  it  over  if  he  says 
anything  more  about  it,  and  let  the  matter  drop." 

I  was  rather  puzzled,  but  I  went  on  with  the 
bank  account. 

"  And  by  the  way,  Phil,  you  needn't  say  any 
thing  to  Mr.  Collingsby  about  those  invoices,"  he 
added,  a  little  while  after. 

"  I  shall  not  be  likely  to  do  so.  He  hardly  ever 
speaks  to  me,  and  I  never  do  to  him,  unless  it 
is  to  answer  a  question." 

"  He's  very  fussy  and  particular.  It  was  care 
less  in  me  to  leave  those  papers  at  home,  but 
it  is  all  right  now.  This  is  a  fine  day,  Phil,  and 
we  will  take  a  sail  about  four  o'clock  if  you  like." 

I  did  like ;  I  always  liked  to  take  a  sail.  I  had 
been  with  him  a  dozen  times  already,  and  had 
been  promoted  to  the  position  of  able  seaman  on 
board,  for  I  had  taken  the  helm,  and  actually 
worked  the  boat  alone  for  hours  at  a  time.  I  had 
been  out  with  the  junior  partner  in  some  pretty 
heavy  blows,  and  enjoyed  them  too.  In  fact,  I 
considered  myself  as  competent  to  handle  the  Fio 
rina  as  I  was  to  make  out  a  trial  balance.  I  looked 
into  the  theory  of  sailing  a  boat,  and  understand 
ing  the  principles,  I  found  the  practice  easy. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       121 

After  the  business  of  the  day  was  done,  we  em 
barked,  and  sailed  with  a  stiff  breeze  to  the  head 
of  the  lake.  Mr.  Whippleton  was  more  than 
usually  kind  and  considerate,  but  he  appeared 
to  be  thoughtful  and  troubled.  He  gave  me  the 
helm,  and  went  into  the  cabin  as  soon  as  we  were 
out  of  the  river.  He  sat  at  the  table,  with  a 
pencil  and  paper,  and  seemed  to  be  absorbed  in 
some  difficult  calculation. 

At  dark  we  were  off  Indiana  City.  I  reported 
to  Mr.  Whippleton,  and  he  came  on  deck.  He 
told  me  to  come  about,  and  I  did  so  without  any 
assistance  from  him.  He  talked  a  little  about  the 
business  of  the  firm,  but  soon  relapsed  into 
silence.  His  manner  was  somewhat  strange,  but 
I  attributed  it  to  his  ill  health.  We  had  an 
abundant  supply  of  provisions  on  board,  such  as 
crackers,  sardines,  lambs'  tongues ;  and  we  usu 
ally  took  our  supper  on  board,  as  we  did  not  re 
turn  to  the  city  till  nine  or  ten.  Sometimes  we 
cooked  ham  and  eggs,  beefsteak,  or  a  mutton  chop, 
and  made  coffee.  I  was  cook  and  steward  gener 
ally,  but  this  time  my  employer  brought  up  some 
eatables,  and  we  took  our  supper  in  the  standing- 


122  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

room.  I  noticed  that  he  had  no  appetite,  and 
I  was  really  afraid  that  he  would  be  seriously  ill. 

The  next  day  I  carried  home  all  the  papers 
relating  to  my  trial  balance,  arid  locked  them 
up  in  my  valise.  Mr.  Whippleton  staid  in  the 
counting-room  all  day  for  the  next  week,  but 
nothing  more  was  said  of  my  unfortunate  at 
tempt  to  prove  my  zeal.  He  did  not,  however, 
bring  the  missing  invoices,  and  I  ventured  to 
mention  the  matter  again.  He  had  forgotten 
all  about  them,  but  would  attend  to  it  the  next 
day. 

Another  week  elapsed  before  he  produced 
them.  I  looked  them  over,  and  they  appeared 
to  be  correct.  They  were  in  the  ordinary  forms, 
with  the  printed  headings  of  the  establishments 
at  which  the  lumber  had  been  purchased.  As 
soon  as  he  gave  them  to  me  I  took  up  the  lum 
ber  book. 

"You  needn't  enter  them  on  that  book,  Phil," 
said  the  junior  partner ;  "  I  don't  believe  in  that 
book,  and  I  won't  have  anything  to  do  with  it. 
File  them  away,  and  don't  say  anything  about 
them  to  any  one." 

Of  course  I  obeyed  my  orders,  but  I  confess 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.       123 

that  I  began  to  think  something  was  wrong. 
The  Whippleton  idea  of  honesty  was  not  very 
high.  The  cash  amounts  of  these  invoices  had 
been  paid,  and  I  supposed  the  lumber  had  been 
received  in  the  yard.  But  Mr.  Whippleton  was 
a  partner  in  the  concern,  and  he  could  not  mean 
to  cheat  himself.  My  curiosity  was  excited,  but 
as  a  clerk  I  had  no  right  to  meddle  with  what 
did  not  concern  me. 

When  I  went  to  bed  that  night  I  could  not 
sleep,  for  my  mind  would  dwell  upon  the  mys 
terious  invoices.  I  heard  the  clock  on  a  church 
strike  twelve,  and  still  I  was  awake.  A  few 
minutes  later  I  heard  a  knock  at  my  door.  Mrs. 
Whippleton  had  been  sick  for  a  week,  and  I  found 
that  the  summons  came  from  her  nurse.  The 
landlady  was  worse,  and  she  wanted  to  see 
me  at  once.  I  hastily  dressed  myself,  and  went 
to  her. 

"  Phil,  1  know  you  are  honest ;  everybody  says 
so.  I  want  to  see  you/'  said  she.  as  I  entered. 

I  could  not  imagine  what  my  honesty  had  to 
do  with  the  matter,  but  I  waited  for  an  ex 
planation. 


124 


CHAPTER  XL 

IN  WHICH   PHIL   TAKES   CHARGE    OF   MRS.    WHIPPLE- 
TON'S   EARTHLY   TREASURE. 

I  HAD  not  seen  Mrs.  Whippleton  for  a  week, 
during  which  time  she  had  been  confined  to 
her  room,  and  I  was  surprised  at  the  change 
which  had  taken  place  in  her  during  that  time. 
She  appeared  to  have  lost  one  half  of  her  flesh, 
and  her  face  was  very  thin  and  pale. 

"  I  didn't  like  to  call  you  up  at  this  time  of 
night,  Philip,  but  I  wanted  to  see  you  very  bad," 
said  she,  in  feeble  tones.  "  I'm  a  very  sick  wo 
man." 

"  I  hope  you  will  get  better,"  I  answered. 
"  I  hope  so  too,  but  there's  no  knowin'." 
"  I  didn't  know  you  were  very  sick." 
"  Perhaps  I  hain't  been  till  to-day.     The  doctor 
looked  kind  o'  anxious  to-night  when  he   came; 
and  I've  been  a  good  deal  worried." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      125 

"  You  must  be  calm,  Mrs.  Whippleton." 

"  I  try  to  be,  but  I  can't ;  and  I  don't  think  any 
body  could  in  my  situation.  I  don't  know  but  I'm 
goin'  to  die." 

"  Let  us  hope  not.  But  I  trust  you  are  pre 
pared  to  die,"  I  added,  with  due  solemnity ;  for  I 
confess  that  the  dreadful  thing  about  her  case  was 
the  idea  of  being  hurried  into  eternity  with  only 
the  worldly  wisdom  she  had  preached  to  me  to  sus 
tain  her  in  the  trying  ordeal. 

"  No,  I'm  not  prepared  to  die.  I've  got  thirty 
thousand  dollars  —  " 

"  I  wouldn't  trouble  myself  about  money,  Mrs. 
Whippleton,"  I  interposed. 

"  That's  what  I  wanted  to  see  you  for,"  said  she, 
looking  at  me  with  apparent  astonishment. 

"  Do  not  think  of  business  while  you  are  sick, 
Mrs.  Whippleton." 

"  But  I  must  think  of  it.  I  have  felt  so  bad  to 
day,  that  I  didn't  know  as  I  should  get  well." 

"  So  much  the  more  need,  then,  of  thinking  of 
other  things  than  money." 

"  I  suppose  you  think  I'm  a  very  great  sinner," 
she  added. 


126  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OB 

"  We  are  all  sinners,  Mrs.  Whippleton ;  and  we 
are  all  great  sinners." 

"  Well,  I  ain't  any  worse'n  the  rest  on  'em.  But 
I  don't  want  to  talk  about  them  things  now.  I've 
got  somethin'  else  on  my  mind.  I've  got  thirty 
thousand  dollars  —  " 


"  But  I  would  not  think  of  that 


now. 


"  I  must  think  on't.  It  worries  me.  I  know 
you  are  an  honest  young  man,  Philip ;  and  I  can't 
say  that  I  know  of  another  one  in  the  whole 
world." 

"  That's  a  harsh  judgment :  but  if  I  am  honest,  it 
is  because  I  believe  in  God  and  try  to  do  his  will." 

"  I  suppose  you  are  right,  Philip.  I  wish  I  was 
better  than  I  am  ;  but  as  I  ain't,  'tain't  no  use  to  cry 
about  it.  I  didn't  send  for  you  to  preach  to  me, 
though  I  hain't  no  kind  o'  doubt  I  need  it  as  bad 
as  any  on  'em.  Ever  since  I  fust  see  you  in 
the  steam  car  I  believed  you  was  honest,  and 
meant  to  do  just  about  what's  right.  Set  up  a 
little  closer  to  me,  for  I  don't  want  to  tell  the 
world  what  I'm  goin'  to  say  to  you.  I  believe  I 
can  trust  you,  Philip." 

"  I  always  try  to  do  what  is  right,  and  I  have  no 
doubt  I  succeed  better  than  those  that  don't  try 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      127 

at  all,"  I  replied,  finding  that  it  was  useless  to  at 
tempt  to  talk  to  her  of  anything  except  money 
and  business ;  though  I  hoped,  when  these  impor 
tant  topics  were  disposed  of,  that  she  would  be 
reasonable  on  matters  of  more  consequence. 

Certainly  her  appearance  was  very  much  al 
tered,  and  she  spoke  of  dying.  Young  as  I  was, 
I  had  already  been  in  the  presence  of  death,  and 
I  thought  that  matters  of  the  soul's  concern  ought 
to  be  attended  to  before  anything  else. 

"  You  knew  that  my  son  Charles  has  been  here 
to-night?"  continued  Mrs.  Whippleton. 

"  No,  I  have  not  seen  him." 

"  He  was ;  and  he  has  been  here  every  night 
for  a  week,  pestering  me"  almost  to  death,  when  I'm 
sick.  He's  fretting  what  little  life  there  is  left  to 
me  out  of  my  body." 

"  Why,  what's  the  matter  with  him?  " 

"  He  wants  money  —  all  I've  got  in  the  world, 
if  I'll  give  it  to  him.  He  says  he  shall  be  ruined 
if  he  can't  get  it." 

" Indeed  !  " 

"  I  don't  know  nothin'  about  it,  but  he  says 
something's  wrong  in  the  firm.  He  wants  forty 
thousand  dollars,  and  must  have  it,  or  be  ruined 


128  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

and  disgraced.  Don't  you  tell  a  soul  what  I'm 
saying  to  you,  Philip." 

A  flood  of  light  was  suddenly  cast  in  upon  my 
perplexed  understanding.  Forty  thousand  dol 
lars  !  That  was  about  the  amount  of  the  mysteri 
ous  invoices.  After  this  revelation  I  had  no  diffi 
culty  in  believing  that  Mr.  Whippleton  had  been 
using  the  money  of  the  firm  in  his  private  land 
speculations.  The  invoices  were  fictitious,  and 
this  explanation  showed  me  why  the  junior  part 
ner  did  not  wish  me  to  mention  them  to  any  one. 
I  even  thought  I  comprehended  the  nature  of  Mr. 
Whippleton's  sudden  illness  when  I  showed  him 
my  trial  balance.  Now  he  was  trying  to  get  the 
money  from  his  mother  to  make  good  his  accounts 
with  the  firm. 

I  was  grieved  and  amazed  at  the  revelation 
thus  forced  upon  me.  I  understood  the  old  lady's 
principles,  or  rather  her  want  of  principles,  and 
granting  that  she  had  given  him  her  code  of 
worldly  wisdom,  as  she  had  to  me,  it  was  not 
strange  that  he  should  turn  out  to  be  a  thief  and  a 
swindler.  However  hard  and  disgusting  it  may 
seem,  there  was  something  like  poetic  justice  in 
his  coming  to  her  upon  her  sick  bed,  perhaps  her 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      129 

dying  bed,  to  demand  the  means  of  repairing  his 
frauds.  I  pitied  my  landlady  in  her  deep  distress, 
but  surely  worldly  wisdom  could  produce  no  dif 
ferent  result. 

"  See  here,  Philip/'  she  continued,  raising  her 
head  with  difficulty  from  the  pillow,  and  taking 
from  beneath  it  a  great  leather  pocket-book,  dis 
tended  by  its  contents.  "  There's  seven  thousand 
dollars,  besides  notes  and  bonds  for  twenty-three 
thousand  more,  in  it." 

"  Why  do  you  keep  so  much  money  in  the 
house,  Mrs.  Whippleton  ?  It  isn't  safe." 

"  I  know  that ;  I  had  it  in  the  bank  till  Charles 
began  to  pester  me,  and  then  I  drew  it  all  out  the 
very  day  I  was  taken  sick."  &. 

"  But  it  was  safe  in  the  bank." 

"  No,  'twan't.  I  was  afraid  Charles  would  forge 
a  check  and  draw  it." 

"  He  wouldn't  do  such  a  thing  as  that." 

"  I  hope  he  wouldn't,  but  I  was  afraid  he  would. 
This  pocket-book  was  in  that  bureau  drawer  till 
Charles  came  to-night.  He  went  there  and  tried 
to  get  it.  I  don't  know  but  he  would  have  got  it 
if  my  nuss  hadn't  come  in.  He  said  he  was  com 
ing  again  to-morrow  morning,  and  would  have  the 
9 


130  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

money ;  so  I  got  up,  and  put  the  pocket-book 
under  my  pillow." 

"  Certainly  he  wouldn't  take  it  away  from  you/' 
I  added,  shocked  at  the  old  lady's  story. 

"  I  don't  know's  he  would,  but  I  was  afraid  on't." 

"  But  you  haven't  forty  thousand  dollars  here." 

"  There's  the  bonds,  which  will  sell  for  all  they 
cost  me,  and  more  too,  besides  the  interest  on 
?em  •  and  it  would  all  come  to  over  thirty  thou 
sand.  Charles  offers  to  give  me  a  mortgage  on 
his  lands  worth  three  times  the  amount,  and  pay 
me  ten  per  cent,  interest  besides." 

"  Why  don't  you  do  it,  then?  " 

"  I  don't  believe  in  his  lands.  Because  folks 
say  he's  got  bit  in  'his  lands,  and  can't  sell  for 
what  he  gin  for  'em,  though  he  says  they  will 
fetch  three  times  what  they  cost  him.  If  they'd 
fetch  what  he  gin  for  7em  he'd  sell  'em.  I  almost 
know  he's  got  bit  on  'em.  But  he  can't  have  my 
money ;  he  owes  me  ten  thousand  dollars  now. 
I've  worked  hard  for  what  little  I've  got,  and  I 
ain't  a  goin'  to  have  it  fooled  away  in  no  land 
speculation." 

It  seemed  to  me  that  the  old  lady  understood 
her  son's  case  perfectly ;  and  my  own  observation 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       131 

fully  confirmed  her  statement.  The  junior  part 
ner  was  certainly  in  a  tight  place. 

"  My  two  married  daughters,  that  need  the 
money  more'n  Charles  does,  would  never  get  a 
cent  of  my  property  if  I  should  let  him  have  it.  I 
ain't  a  goin'  to  do  it,  not  if  I  should  die  afore 
mornin'." 

"  I.  don't  think  you  are  in  any  immediate  danger, 
Mrs.  Whippleton,"  I  replied ;  and  I  did  not  believe 
that  one  who  could  talk  as  fast  as  she  did  was  in 
any  present  peril. 

"  But  Charles  will  pester  the  life  out  of  me  to 
get  this  money  and  these  papers.  I'm  afraid  he's 
been  doin'  something  that's  wrong." 

"  What  do  you  wish  .me  to  do  for  you  ?  " 

"  I'll  tell  you,  Philip.  I  know  you're  honest,  and 
I  will  trust  you  just  as  far  as  any  human  bein'  can 
be  trusted,"  she  continued ;  but  she  paused  again, 
and  I  concluded  that  she  was  not  quite  satisfied 
to  trust  even  me. 

"  You  believe  I  can  trust  you  —  don't  you  ?  " 
she  added,  taking  the  valuable  package  from  under 
the  bed-clothes. 

"  You  must  be  your  own  judge,  Mrs.  Whip 
pleton." 


132  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  I  know  I  can ! "  she  exclaimed,  suddenly. 
"  You  would  not  rob  a  poor  woman  who  is  on  her 
dying  bed." 

"  I  certainly  would  not." 

"  At  any  rate,  I  know  Charles  would  rob  me  of 
every  dollar  I  have  in  the  world,  and  think  he  was 
smart  to  do  it;  but  I  don't  believe  you  would," 
Baid  she,  extending  the  package  towards  me. 

"  What  do  you  wish  me  to  do  with  it?"  I  re 
plied,  taking  her  treasure  —  her  only  treasure,  it 
eeemed  to  me,  either  in  earth  or  in  heaven. 

It  was  only  the  treasure  where  thieves  break 
through  and  steal ;  and  the  thief  was  at  hand  — 
one  whom  she  had  trained  up  in  the  ways  of 
worldly  wisdom. 

"  I  don't  know  ;  only  put  it  where  Charles  can't 
get  it ;  that's  all." 

"  But  I  have  no  safe  place  for  it." 

"  You  can  put  it  somewhere.  I  feel  better  now 
It  is  out  of  my  hands,"  she  added,  with  a  deep 
sigh. 

"  Really,  Mrs.  Whippleton,  I  can't  take  charge 
of  this.  I  am  afraid  it  would  make  me  as  miser 
able  as  it  has  you." 

"  You  must  take  it;  Philip.     You  are  the  only 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       133 

honest  man  I  know  of.  Keep  it  safe,  and  when 
I'm  gone,  —  if  I'm  goin'  this  time,  —  don't  give  it 
to  anybody  but  my  administrator." 

"  I  don't  like  to  take  it,  Mrs.  Whippleton." 

"  That's  the  very  reason  why  I  want  you  to  take 
it.  If  you  was  more  willing,  I  shouldn't  be  so  anx 
ious  to  give  it  to  you.  I  know  you'll  be  careful 
of  it." 

"  I  will  tell  you  what  I  will  do  with  it,  if  you 
are  willing.  I  want  to  go  to  St.  Louis  to  see  my 
father.  If  Mr.  Whippleton  will  let  me  off  to-mor 
row,  for  a  few  days,  I  will  go  then.  I  will  seal  up 
the  package,  and  my  father  will  keep  it  in  his 
safe." 

"  Is  your  father  honest?  " 

"He  is." 

"  He  must  be  if  he  is  your  father.  Do  as  you 
think  best.  If  he  can  put  the  money  out  at  in 
terest  for  me,  I  should  like  it  all  the  better.'^ 

"  Very  well.  I  will  give  you  my  receipt  for 
this  package,  and  that  will  at  least  be  evidence 
that  I  took  it,  and  at  your  request." 

I  put  the  treasure  in  my  pocket,  and  then  led 
the  conversation  into  another  channel.  I  tried 
to  awaken  in  her  mind  an  interest  in  that  other 


134  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

treasure,  where  thieves  do  not  break  through  nor 
steal ;  but  she  was  tired,  and  said  she  wanted  to 
rest.  She  had  talked  so  much  that  she  was  all 
worn  out.  She  was  a  sad  spectacle  to  me,  and 
though  she  had  gathered  together  a  considerable 
fortune,  it  seemed  to  me  that  her  life  was  a  fail 
ure  ;  she  had  not  realized  the  true  success. 

I  went  to  my  room,  opened  the  package,  and 
made  out  a  list  of  all  the  valuable  papers  which 
it  contained.  I  wrote  a  receipt  for  them  and  for 
the  money,  and  then,  with  the  treasure  under  my 
pillow,  I  went  to  sleep.  The  next  morning  I 
called  upon  the  old  lady,  and  gave  her  the  receipt. 
The  nurse  thought  she  was  better,  and  said  she 
had  slept  very  well  after  I  left  her.  Mrs. 
Whippleton  told  me  she  was  willing  to  pay  my  ex 
penses  to  St.  Louis,  and  I  might  take  the  money 
for  the  purpose  from  the  package. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      135 


CHAPTER    XII. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL  VISITS  THE   HOUSE  OF  MR.  COLLINGSBY, 
AND    SEES   MISS   MARIAN. 

I  WENT  to  the  counting-room  at  an  early  hour. 
My  first  care  was  to  tie  up  the  valuable  pack 
age,  which  I  had  brought  with  me,  in  thick  paper, 
and  to  seal  it  very  carefully.  I  wrote  my  own 
name  upon  it,  and  then  placed  it  in  one  of  the 
drawers  of  the  safe,  the  key  of  which  was  kept  in 
the  desk.  I  hoped  to  obtain  permission,  when  Mr. 
Whippleton  came  to  the  counting-room,  to  visit  St. 
Louis,  especially  as  business  was  not  as  driving  as 
usual.  I  did  all  my  routine  work,  and  the  junior 
partner  had  not  arrived.  I  w^as  not  anxious  to  see 
him  for  any  other  purpose  than  to  obtain  leave  of 
absence.  Indeed,  the  idea  of  meeting  him  was 
very  embarrassing.  After  what  his  mother  had 
said,  I  was  satisfied  that  Mr.  Whippleton  had  been 
using  the  funds  of  the  firm  in  his  own  private 


136  DESK   AND    DEBIT,   OR 

speculations.  It  was  evident  that  he  had  appro 
priated  no  less  a  sum  than  forty  thousand  dollars, 
which  was  represented  by  the  fictitious  invoices. 
I  did  not  believe  that  he  intended  to  purloin  the 
money,  but  would  replace  it  when  his  land  specula 
tions  yielded  their  returns.  Mr.  Collingsby  never 
examined  the  books  thoroughly,  and  was  not  likely 
to  discover  the  fraud.  I  knew  all  about  it,  and  it 
suddenly  flashed  upon  my  mind  that  it  would  be 
wrong  for  me  to  be  a  party  to  a  concealment. 

I  was  not  employed  by  Mr.  Whippleton  alone, 
but  by  the  firm.  My  obligations  were  to  both  the 
partners ;  and  though  Mr.  Collingsby  never  took 
any  notice  of  me,  my  duty  to  him  was  just  as  ur 
gent  as  to  the  junior.  The  thought  startled  me. 
My  soul  revolted  at  the  idea  of  any  treachery  to 
Mr.  Whippleton,  who  had  always  been  very  kind 
to  me.  But  on  the  other  hand,  my  moral  sense 
revolted  at  the  thought  of  concealing  his  fraud.  I 
was  troubled  by  the  situation. 

Mrs.  Whippleton  did  not  believe  that  her  son's 
enterprise  in  real  estate  was  a  success.  In  her 
own  words,  he  "  had  been  bitten.'7  It  seemed  to 
me  that,  in  the  end,  there  must  be  a  fearful  ex- 
plosion.  As  I  had  the  whole  charge  of  the  books 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLEEK.      137 

now,  I  did  not  see  how  I  could  avoid  any  com- 
plicity  with  the  fraud.  In  fact,  I  had  already  dis 
covered  it.  I  felt  that  I  had  a  duty  to  perform, 
and  that,  if  I  exposed  the  junior  partner,  he,  and 
not  I,  would  be  guilty  of  his  fall.  Was  it  mean 
ness,  ingratitude,  or  treachery  in  me  to  put  Mr. 
Collingsby  on  his  guard  ?  If  I  could  save  Mr. 
Whippleton,  I  wished  to  do  so.  It  was  plain  that 
he  had  come  to  a  realizing  sense  of  his  danger, 
and  was  persecuting  his  mother  to  obtain  the 
means  of  making  good  his  deficit.  But  all  the  old 
lady's  money  would  not  cover  the  deficiency,  and 
it  was  also  impossible  for  him  to  obtain  it.  He 
had  falsified  the  books,  and  he  could  not  undo 
that. 

If  I  continued  to  cover  up  Mr.  Whippleton's 
error,  I  became  a  party  to  it.  He  was  a  bad  man, 
and  I  could  not  fail  to  see  my  duty.  I  must  in 
form  Mr.  Collingsby  of  what  I  had  discovered. 
But  though  my  duty  was  clear,  my  inclination 
rebelled.  The  junior  partner  had  been  kind  and 
considerate ;  the  senior,  lofty  and  distant.  It 
seemed  almost  like  betraying  my  friend.  While  I 
was  still  considering  the  matter,  Mr.  Whippleton 
came  in.  I  had  not  reached  any  conclusion,  ex- 


138  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

cept  that  I  would  not  be  a  party  to  the  fraud  by 
concealing  it. 

"  Phil,  do  you  know  where  Mr.  Collingsby 
lives  ?  "  said  the  junior  partner,  while  I  was  still 
in  this  state  of  doubt  and  uncertainty. 

"  I  do,  sir." 

"  I  wish  you  would  go  up  and  show  him  this 
list  of  lumber,'7  continued  Mr.  Whippleton,  who 
seemed  to  be  very  much  excited,  and  was  very 
pale.  "  Tell  him  I  can  buy  the  lot  at  a  very  low 
figure  if  I  can  pay  cash  at  one  o'clock  to-day." 

"  I  wish  you  would  send  Robert,"  I  replied, 
alluding  to  the  new  entry  clerk.  "  I  want  to 
speak  to  you  about  the  books." 

"  Never  mind  the  books,"  he  answered.  "  I 
want  you  to  go,  for  you  can  tell  him  all  about  the 
cash  of  the  concern.  I  heard  just  now  that  he 
was  not  very  well,  and  probably  would  not  be 
here  to-day." 

By  this  time  I  had  made  up  my  mind  what  to 
do,  and  the  conclusion  seemed  to  afford  me  the 
means  of  escaping  both  horns  of  the  dilemma  into 
which  I  was  plunged.  I  glanced  at  the  mem 
oranda  which  Mr.  Whippleton  handed  to  me,  and  I 
saw  that  about  twenty-five  thousand  dollars  would 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLEKK.      139 

be  required  to  make  the  purchase  he  contem 
plated.  Our  cash  balance  in  the  bank  was  about 
six  thousand,  and  Mr.  Collingsby  was  expected  to 
furnish  the  rest.  I  did  not  care  to  go  to  the  sen 
ior  partner  upon  such  an  errand,  for  I  was  afraid 
that  the  transaction  the  junior  meditated  might 
include  another  fictitious  invoice. 

"  Well,  will  you  go  ?  "  demanded  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton,  while  I  was  looking  at  the  list. 

"  I  would  rather  not,  sir/'  I  replied. 

«  What !  " 

"  I  have  come  to  the  conclusion  that  I  should 
resign  my  place  here,"  I  replied,  finding  that 
nothing  but  plain  speech  would  answer  my  pur 
pose. 

"  Resign  1 "  exclaimed  he. 

He  was  paler  than  ever,  and  my  words  evidently 
startled  him. 

"  What  do  you  mean  by  that  ?  Are  you  not  sat 
isfied  with  your  salary  ?  If  you  are  not,  I  will 
give  you  ten  dollars  a  week,  or  twelve,  or  more,  if 
you  desire." 

"  My  salary  is  quite  satisfactory." 

"  And  you  are  engaged  for  a  year." 

"  I  know  I  am,  but  I  hope  you  will  let  me  off." 


140 


"  No ;  I  will  not.  This  is  a  shabby  trick,  aftei 
I  have  taken  the  trouble  to  break  you  in,  and  you 
know  our  books  perfectly." 

"  I'm  afraid  I  know  them  too  well,"  I  replied. 

"What  do  you  mean  by  that?  "he  asked;  but 
he  dropped  into  a  chair,  apparently  faint,  as  he 
had  been  on  the  preceding  occasion. 

"  I  believe  in  being  fair  and  square,  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton.  There  is  something  wrong  about  the 
books." 

"  Nonsense,  Phil.  That  is  only  because  there 
are  some  things  about  the  business  which  you 
don't  understand." 

"  I  want  to  go  to  St.  Louis  this  afternoon  to  see 
my  father." 

"  Very  well ;  you  can  go.  You  can  be  absent  a 
week,  if  you  wish.  Haven't  I  used  you  well, 
Phil  ?  " 

"  You  have,  sir,  —  very  well,  indeed ;  and  I  am 
grateful  to  you  for  all  your  kindness." 

"  Then  why  should  you  leave  ?  If  you  wish  to 
see  your  father,  go  to  St.  Louis  for  a  week  or  two. 
Your  salary  shall  be  paid  just  the  same  as  though 
you  were  here." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      141 

"  Thank  you,  sir ;  you  are  very  kind,  and  you 
always  are." 

"  Then  why  do  you  want  to  leave  me  ?  " 

"  It  is  because  you  have  always  used  me  well 
that  I  wish  to  go.  I  am  afraid  my  trial  balance 
was  more  correct  than  I  supposed  at  the  time." 

"  What  do  you  mean,  Phil  ? "  demanded  he, 
springing  to  his  feet  with  sudden  energy. 

"  Whether  right  or  wrong,  sir,  I  believe  that 
you  have  taken  about  forty  thousand  dollars  out 
of  the  concern  without  the  knowledge  or  consent 
of  your  partner." 

"  Why,  Phil !  " 

He  dropped  into  his  chair  again,  and  I  was  sat 
isfied  that  I  had  hit  the  nail  on  the  head.  He 
gasped  and  trembled,  but,  fortunately  for  him,  we 
were  alone  in  the  counting-room. 

"  I  have  spoken  just  what  I  think,  sir  j  but  I 
hope  I  am  mistaken." 

"  You  are  mistaken,  Phil ;  most  tremendously 
mistaken.  I  like  you,  Phil ;  if  I  did  not,  I  should 
kick  you  out  of  the  counting-room  without  another 
word.  But  I  believe  you  mean  to  be  honest,  and 
that  you  have  made  an  honest  blunder,  though  it 
is  a  very  stupid  one." 


142  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  Certainly  the  lumber  included  in  those  invoices 
you  brought  down  from  your  rooms  was  never 
entered  in  the  lumber  book." 

"  Confound  the  lumber  book  !  Never  mention 
the  thing  again  to  me  !  I  have  told  you  that  no 
reliance  whatever  can  be  placed  upon  it.  I  can 
convince  you  of  your  mistake  in  one  hour." 

"  I  shall  be  very  glad  to  be  convinced." 

u  But  we  haven't  the  hour  now  to  look  up  the 
matter.  I  will  explain  it  all  to  you  this  afternoon, 
and  then,  if  you  are  not  satisfied,  I  will  let  you 
go,  and  pay  you  a  year's  salary,  besides." 

"  I  only  want  to  know  what  became  of  the  lum 
ber  billed  to  the  firm  in  those  invoices,"  I  an 
swered,  not  at  all  satisfied  with  his  proposition. 

"  I  will  show  you  this  afternoon.  Now,  go  up 
to  Mr.  Collingsby's  and  do  my  errand.  The  firm 
may  lose  a  good  bargain,  if  I  miss  this  trade." 

I  concluded  to  go  to  the  senior  partner's.  I 
inquired  particularly  in  regard  to  the  lumber  Mr. 
Whippleton  purposed  to  buy,  but  all  the  junior 
said  assured  me  that  he  was  preparing  for  another 
movement.  I  took  the  list,  and  a  memorandum  of 
the  cash  balance  in  the  bank;  and  left  the  office. 
Somehow,  in  spite  of  myself,  I  felt  guilty.  Even 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      143 

my  resolve  to  leave  the  service  of  the  firm  did  not 
satisfy  me.  It  would  only  leave  the  senior  partner 
to  be  swindled  still  more.  I  hastened  to  the  house 
of  Mr.  Collingsby,  which  I  had  never  entered.  I 
rang  the  bell,  and  was  admitted  to  the  entry, 
where  I  was  required  to  wait  till  the  senior  part 
ner  could  be  informed  of  my  desire  to  see  him. 

"  It's  a  magnificent  day  to  sail,"  said  a  gen 
tleman  in  the  parlor,  near  the  door  of  which  I 
stood. 

I  recognized  the  voice  of  Mr.  Waterford,  the 
owner  of  the  yacht  which  was  the  twin  sister  of 
the  Fiorina.  He  was  generally  called,  by  those 
who  knew  him,  Ben  Waterford.  He  was  reputed 
to  have  made  a  fortune  in  real  estate  speculations, 
and  was  a  young  man  of  fine  personal  appearance. 
I  had  often  seen  him  when  out  sailing  with  Mr. 
Whippleton.  My  own  impression  was  not  very 
favorable ;  for  I  regarded  him  as  riot  only  rather 
fast,  but  as  lacking  in  moral  principle.  As  he 
spoke  he  walked  towards  the  door,  and  I  saw  that 
he  was  with  a  young  lady  of  seventeen  or  eighteen, 
a  very  beautiful  and  a  very  elegant  girl  in  style 
and  manner. 

"  I  should  be  delighted  to  go,"  said  she  ;  "  but 


144  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

you  give  me  very  short  notice.  You  wish  to  leave 
in  an  hour." 

"  Of  course  we  will  wait  till  you  are  ready.  Miss 
Collingsby." 

It  was  the  daughter  of  Mr.  Richard  Collingsby, 
and  I  had  heard  that  her  name  was  Marian.  Land 
Limpedon  had  rehearsed  her  charms  to  me,  and 
with  no  little  disgust  had  added  that  Ben  Water- 
ford  was  "  waiting  upon  her."  It  seemed  to  me 
quite  proper,  therefore,  that  he  should  take  her 
out  to  sail. 

"  I  will  endeavor  to  be  ready  in  an  hour,"  she 
added.  "  But  who  is  going  with  you  ?  " 

"  My  sister  and  one  or  two  others.  We  shall 
have  a  nice  time.  The  lake  is  still,  and  it  is  a 
splendid  day.  We  shall  have  a  good  dinner,  and 
I  know  that  you  will  enjoy  it ;  only  bring  plenty 
of  thick  clothing,  for  it  may  be  chilly  before  we 
return." 

"  I  always  carry  plenty  of  clothing  when  I  go 
upon  the  water.  But  you  don't  tell  me  who  is 
going,  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  My  sister  and  —  " 

"  I  never  saw  your  sister.  Is  there  any  one  I 
know  ?  "  asked  Miss  Collingsby. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      145 

"  I  have  invited  four,  and  they  all  said  they 
would  go  if  they  could.  It  is  short  notice,  but 
you  see,  Miss  Collingsby,  I  never  like  to  take  out 
any  ladies  without  being  sure  of  the  weather." 

"  You  are  very  wise  and  prudent,  Mr.  Water- 
ford,"  laughed  the  beautiful  young  lady  ;  "  I  shall 
be  there,  for  one." 

"  Thank  you ;  then  we  shall  be  sure  to  have  a 
pleasant  time/'  added  the  skipper. 

"  But  I  shall  not  go  unless  some  of  the  rest  of 
the  party  appear.  I  will  not  go  alone." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  will  be  in  the  Fiorina,  near  us. 
We  shall  sail  in  company,  and  he  will  have  a  party 
in  his  boat." 

The  young  lady  very  properly  repeated  her 
stipulation  that  others  should  join  the  party,  and 
when  the  terms  were  duly  arranged,  Mr.  Water- 
ford  left  the  house.  Miss  Marian  glanced  at  me, 
and  that  was  all.  Probably  she  did  not  think  I 
was  worth  noticing;  but  she  changed  her  mind 
before  night,  for  it  so  happened  that  I  was  one  of 
the  party  in  Mr.  Waterford's  yacht  that  day. 

The  servant  showed  me  up  stairs,  where  I 
found  Mr.  Collingsby  comfortably  sick  in  his  arm 
chair. 

10 


146 


CHAPTER   XIII. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL   LOOKS   INTO   THE   OPERATIONS   OF 
THE   JUNIOR   PARTNER. 

AS  I  went  up  the  stairs,  I  did  not  see  how  Mr. 
Whippleton  was  to  sail  a  party  in  his  yacht 
on  the  lake,  and  still  explain  to  me  the  difficulty 
about  the  books  of  the  firm.  But  then,  what  had 
been  so  mysterious  in  the  ways  of  the  junior  part 
ner  was  now  becoming  more  tangible.  In  solving 
the  problem  of  the  invoices,  all  the  rest  of  the 
trouble  seemed  to  be  unravelled.  Mr.  Ben  Water- 
ford  intimated  that  Mr.  Whippleton  was  to  sail  his 
boat  with  a  party  on  the  lake  within  an  hour  or 
two.  Perhaps  he  intended  to  complete  his  great 
purchase  before  that  time. 

I  did  not  believe  that  he  expected  anything  of 
the  kind,  however.  I  found  myself  very  suspi 
cious  of  Mr.  Charles  Whippleton.  He  had  plun 
dered  the  firm  of  a  large  sum  of  money,  and  it 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      147 

looked  now  as  though  ho  intended  to  enlarge  his 
operations  in  this  direction,  rather  than  make  good 
the  deficit.  I  found  it  impossible  to  escape  the  re 
sponsibility  of  my  position,  and  it  pressed  heavily 
upon  me. 

"  Well,  young  man,"  said  Mr.  Collingsby,  as  I 
entered  the  chamber,  where  he  was  seated. 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  sent  me  to  see  you  in  regard 
to  a  transaction  he  wishes  to  complete  this  fore 
noon,"  I  replied,  producing  my  papers. 

"Why  didn't  he  come  himself?" 

I  could  not  help  thinking  there  was  a  great  deal 
of  force  in  this  question,  and  it  strengthened  some 
vague  resolves  in  my  mind. 

"  I  don't  know,  sir.  He  told  me  to  show  you 
this  list  of  lumber,  with  prices,"  I  continued,  ex 
plaining  more  fully  the  errand  upon  which  I  had 
been  sent. 

"  He  should  have  come  himself,"  added  the  sen 
ior  partner,  with  a  frown.  u  What  is  the  balance 
in  the  bank?" 

"About  six  thousand  dollars,"  I  replied,  handing 
him  the  memorandum  I  had  made. 

"  It  ought  to  be  thirty,  if  not  fifty  thousand, 
Don't  you  make  any  collections  now?" 


148  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  Yes,  sir ;  about  the  same  as  usual." 
"  There  is  something  very  strange  in  the  busi 
ness.  I  am  asked  to  furnish  twenty  thousand  dol 
lars  outside  of  the  capital  I  have  already  invested 
in  the  firm.  Tell  Mr.  Whippleton  to  come  and  see 
me  immediately." 

"  I  will,  sir  |  "  and  I  turned  to  go. 
"  Stop    a    minute,    young    man.      What's    your 
name  ?  "  interposed  the  senior. 
"  Philip,  sir." 

"Do  you  keep  the  books  now,  Mr.  Philips?" 
My  dignified  uncle  did  not  even  know  my  name, 
and  had  made  a  mistake  which  I  did  not  think  it 
necessary  to  correct,  since  he  took  so  little  inter 
est  in  the  matter. 

"  I  do  most  of  the  work  now,  sir,  on  them,"  I  re 
plied. 

u  Have  you  any  list  of  debts  due  the  concern  ?  " 
'•'No,  sir:  there  is  none  at  the  counting-room." 
"  It  seems  to  me  that  proper  attention  is  not 
given   to   the   matter   of  credits   and   collections. 
We    should   have  a  much  larger  balance    in   the 
bank." 

"  Shall  I  tell  Mr.  Whippleton  you  wish  to  see 
him?"  I  replied,  edging  towards  the  door. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      149 

"  Can  you  answer  my  question,  Mr.  Philips  ? " 
demanded  the  senior,  sternly. 

"  I  cannot,  sir ;  Mr.  Whippleton  has  charge  of 
the  finances.  When  credits  have  been  given,  they 
have  been  on  time  notes,  which  are  paid  as  they 
mature,'7  I  answered. 

"  We  had  thirty  thousand  surplus  capital  on  the 
first  of  January." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  has  laid  in  a  large  stock  of 
lumber." 

"  And  now  wishes  to  increase  it,  after  the  best 
business  of  the  year  is  over.  I  don't  under 
stand  it." 

"  Nor  I,  sir." 

"You  don't?" 

"  No,  sir ;  and  since  you  have  spoken  to  me 
about  the  matter,  I  wish  to  add  that  I  think  some 
thing  is  wrong." 

"  What  do  you  mean,  Mr.  Philips  ?  " 

"  I  suppose  I  ought  riot  to  meddle  with  what 
does  not  concern  me." 

"  Does  not  concern  you !  Are  you  not  em 
ployed  by  the  firm  ?  " 

"  Yes,  sir ;  but  what  the  members  of  the  firm  do 
with  their  capital  does  not  concern  me." 


150  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

"You  said  you  thought  something  was  wrong, 
Mr.  Philips.  What  do  you  mean  by  that?" 

"I  made  out  a  trial  balance  for  the  business 
of  the  last  six  months.  Mr.  Whippleton  de 
stroyed  it." 

I  felt  that  I  was  doing  my  duty,  and  as  briefly 
as  I  could,  I  told  the  whole  story  about  the  in 
voices.  I  saw  that  the  senior  partner  was  startled. 
And  he  understood  where  his  balance  was. 

"  Why  didn't  you  speak  to  me  of  this  before,  Mr. 
Philips?" 

"I  have  always  talked  with  Mr.  Whippleton 
about  the  books  and  the  business.  I  did  not  feel 
at  liberty  to  speak  to  you  about  it." 

"  You  ought  to  have  done  so." 

"  Perhaps  I  ought,  sir;  but  it  was  a  very  delicate 
matter,  and  Mr.  Whippleton  says  now  that  it  is  all 
right.  Perhaps  it  is,  sir;  I  don't  know.  I  only 
say  I  don't  understand  it." 

"Neither  do  I.  Something  shall  be  done  at 
once.  Where  are  those  invoices  which  you  think 
are  fictitious  ones  ?  " 

"  On  file,  sir." 

"  Send  them  to  me  at  once.  Stop.  I  will  go  to 
the  counting-room  myself,"  he  continued,  begin- 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      151 

ning  to  be  excited,  as  he  rose  from  his  easy- 
chair. 

"  They  have  never  been  entered  in  the  lumber 
book,  sir." 

"  What's  the  lumber  book  ?  " 

I  explained  what  it  was. 

"  Send  Mr.  Faxon  to  me.  Send  the  invoices  by 
him/'  continued  the  senior.  "  Perhaps  I  can  look 
into  the  matter  better  here  than  at  the  counting- 
room." 

I  wondered  that  he  even  knew  who  Mr.  Faxon 
was.  A  man  who  had  so  little  knowledge  of  his 
own  business  as  Mr.  Collingsby  almost  deserved 
to  be  cheated  out  of  his  property. 

"What  shall  I  say  to  Mr.  Whippleton,  sir?"  I 
asked. 

"  Tell  him  we  will  not  increase  our  stock  at  any 
rate,"  he  replied,  decidedly.  "  Do  you  think  Mr. 
Whippleton  has  been  using  the  firm's  money  for 
his  own  purposes,  Mr.  Philips  ?  " 

"  That  is  not  for  me  to  say,  sir.  Mr.  Whipple 
ton  has  always  been  very  kind  to  me,  and  I  dislike 
to  say  anything  about  this  business." 

"  But,  Mr.  Philips,  you  are  employed  by  the  firm, 
of  which  I  am  the  senior  member.  I  furnished 


152  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

nearly  all  the  capital  —  that  is,  my  father  and  I  to 
gether." 

"  I  know  it,  sir ;  and  I  felt  it  to  be  my  duty  to 
speak,  or  I  should  not  have  done  so.  Of  course  I 
have  drawn  a  catastrophe  upon  myself  by  what  I 
have  done." 

"What's  that?" 

"Mr.  Whippleton  will  hate  me,  and  discharge 
me  at  once.  I  wished  to  resign  this  morning,  but 
he  would  not  allow  me  to  do  so." 

"  I'm  glad  he  did  not.  If  I  find  you  have  been 
mistaken,  I  shall  say  nothing  about  the  matter  to 
him.  Mr.  Faxon  and  the  invoices  will  soon  answer 
me  one  way  or  the  other.  I  asked  you  if  you 
thought  Mr.  Whippleton  had  been  using  the  firm's, 
money  for  his  own  purposes.  You  did  not  an 
swer  me." 

"  I  think  he  has,  sir.  He  is  engaged  in  a  large 
land  speculation  with  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  Waterford  !  "  exclaimed  the  dignified  senior. 
"  He  is  no  better  than  a  swindler." 

"  Indeed  !  "  I  exclaimed,  recalling  the  fact  that  I 
had  just  seen  the  subject  of  this  harsh  epithet  mak 
ing  an  appointment  with  the  beautiful  daughter  of 
Mr.  Collingsby. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      153 

"  Perhaps  I  know  him  better  than  others ;  but 
no  matter  about  him." 

"  He  is  a  very  wealthy  young  man/'  I  suggested. 

"  No ;  he  made  a  good  thing  of  one  or  two  spec 
ulations,  and  may  possibly  have  twenty  or  thirty 
thousand  dollars,  if  he  hasn't  sunk  it  in  some  of  his 
mad  schemes.  I  was  foolish  enough  to  indorse 
one  of  his  notes  without  security.  He  is  an  un 
principled  man  ;  and  if  Whippleton  has  been  oper 
ating  with  him,  I  am  not  surprised  that  he  is  in 
trouble.  Now  go,  Mr.  Philips,  and  send  Mr.  Fax 
on,  with  the  invoices." 

I  bowed  myself  out,  and  hastened  back  to  the 
counting-room,  where  I  found  Mr.  Whippleton 
waiting  my  return  with  feverish  impatience. 

"  What  have  you  been  about,  Phil  ? "  he  de 
manded. 

"  Talking  with  Mr.  Collingsby.  He  declines 
to  have  the  stock  increased,  and  don't  approve 
your  proposition." 

"  He  is  an  idiot !  "  exclaimed  the  junior,  with  a 
savage  oath.  "  What  were  you  talking  about  all 
this  time,  Phil?" 

"  I  answered  the  questions  he  put  to  me,  and 
stated  your  proposition  fully." 


154  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

Mr.  Faxon  came  in  opportunely  at  this  moment 
to  save  me  from  a  more  searching  examination, 
and  took  his  place  at  the  desk.  The  junior  part 
ner  was  evidently  vexed  and  disconcerted.  He 
looked  at  his  watch,  and  walked  back  and  forth 
very  nervously.  In  a  few  moments  he  went  out. 
I  took  the  mysterious  invoices  from  the  file,  en 
closed  them  in  an  envelope,  and  delivered  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby's  message  to  the  head  salesman.  It  was 
very  evident  that  an  explosion  could  not  be  long 
deferred.  Mr.  Faxon  would  be  able  to  inform  the 
senior  partner  that  the  lumber  mentioned  in  the 
fictitious  invoices  had  never  been  received  in  the 
yard.  The  Michigan  Pine  Company  had  an  agency 
in  the  city,  and  it  would  be  a  very  easy  matter  to 
verify  the  principal  bill,  if  it  were  a  genuine  one. 

Mr.  Whippleton  soon  returned.  He  looked 
more  cheerful  and  satisfied  than  when  he  went 
out ;  but  as  he  came  near  me,  I  smelt  his  breath, 
and  found  that  his  new  inspiration  was  whiskey. 
He  immediately  sent  me  to  settle  with  a  building 
firm  who  had  made  large  purchases,  though  he 
usually  attended  to  this  portion  of  the  business 
himself.  I  was  absent  about  an  hour.  "When  I  re- 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       155 

turned,  the  junior  partner  was  not  in  the  count- 
ing-room. 

"  Where  is  Mr.  Whippleton?"  I  asked. 

"  He  went  out  about  five  minutes  ago/'  replied 
the  entry  clerk. 

"  Did  he  say  where  he  was  going?  " 

"  No ;  he  drew  a  check,  and  left  with  that  and  a 
lot  of  other  papers  in  his  hand." 

I  took  the  check  book  from  the  safe,  and  found 
that  he  had  drawn  the  entire  balance,  save  a  few 
dollars.  I  was  alarmed.  The  crisis  seemed  to 
come  sooner  than  I  expected. 

"  What  papers  did  he  take  ?  "  I  asked. 

"  I  don't  know  what  they  were.  He  took  a  file 
from  the  safe,  and  looked  it  over  for  some  time." 

"  Which  file  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know." 

I  went  to  the  safe,  and  found  that  the  notes  re 
ceivable  had  been  considerably  deranged,  for  I 
had  put  them  away  with  the  nicest  care.  I  satis 
fied  myself  that  quite  a  number  of  them  had  been 
taken  from  the  file.  Mr.  Whippleton  was  evi 
dently  raising  a  large  sum  of  money.  I  placed  the 
note  book  upon  the  table,  and  told  the  entry  clerk  to 
check  off  the  notes  as  I  read  them.  When  we  had 


156  DESK   AND   DEBIT;   OR 

finished  this  comparison,  those  not  checked  were 
the  notes  the  junior  had  taken.  They  repre 
sented  about  thirty-two  thousand  dollars.  At 
this  moment  he  was,  doubtless,  raising  the  money 
on  these  notes. 

What  should  I  do  ?  Mr.  Whippleton  was  a  vil 
lain  !  I  concluded  that  he  found  it  impossible  to 
conceal  his  frauds  much  longer,  and  he  was  get 
ting  together  all  the  money  he  could,  in  order  to 
flee  to  some  safer  locality.  He  had  persecuted 
his  mother  with  a  pertinacity  which  indicated  a 
resolute  purpose  to  do  something.  Now  he  had 
taken  notes  and  cash  to  the  amount  of  thirty-eight 
thousand  dollars.  I  was  no  longer  troubled  with 
any  scruples  about  exposing  him,  and  I  felt  that  I 
was  hunting  a  villain. 

I  hastened  with  all  speed  to  the  house  of  Mr. 
Collingsby,  and  without  waiting  for  the  slow  for 
malities  of  the  ceremonious  servant,  I  rushed  up 
stairs  to  the  chamber  of  the  senior  partner.  I 
knocked,  but  I  did  not  wait  for  a  summons  before 
I  entered. 

"I  am  glad  you  have  come,  Mr.  Philips,"  said 
Mr.  Collingsby.  "  You  are  entirely  right.  These 
invoices  are  fictitious.  Mr.  Faxon  has  been  to  the 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      157 

office  of  the  Michigan  Pine  Company,  and  no  such 
goods  have  been  sold  to  our  firm." 

"  I  was  pretty  well  satisfied  on  that  point,  sir ; 
but  the  matter  is  worse  than  that.  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton  has  just  checked  out  the  entire  balance  in  the 
bank,  and  taken  away  notes  to  the  amount  of  thir 
ty-two  thousand  dollars,"  I  replied. 

"  The  villain  ! "  ejaculated  Mr.  Collingsby. 


158  DESK   AND   DEBIT.   OB 


CHAPTER  XIV. 

IN  WHICH   PHIL   MEETS   WITH  A   SERIOUS    CATASTROPHE. 


"  ^tT^OU  have   done  wrong,  Mr.  Philips  !  "   said 

JL     the  senior  partner,  with  energy. 

"  I  did  the  best  I  could,  sir.'7 

"  No,  you  didn't.  You  ought  to  have  spoken 
to  me  the  moment  you  found  anything  wrong 
about  the  books." 

"  I  was  not  sure  that  anything  was  wrong,  sir. 
Mr.  Whippleton  said  they  were  all  right.  When 
I  found  the  invoices  were  missing,  I  spoke  to 
him  about  them,  and  in  about  two  weeks  he 
brought  them  from  his  rooms." 

"  But  you  knew  that  the  lumber  of  these  in 
voices  was  not  entered  on  the  lumber  book." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  said  he  did  not  recognize 
the  lumber  book,  and  told  me  not  to  say  any 
thing  to  Mr.  Faxon  about  them,"  I  pleaded.  "  He 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      159 

was  my  employer,  and  I  had  to  do  what  he 
ordered  me  to  do." 

"  I'm  your  employer  as  much  as  he,"  protested 
the  senior. 

"  That's  very  true,  sir ;  but  I  never  talked  with 
you  about  the  books  or  the  business.  You 
hardly  ever  spoke  to  me,  sir." 

"What  has  that  to  do  with  it,  Mr.  Philips?" 
demanded  he,  sternly. 

"  I  did  not  feel  at  liberty  to  speak  to  you  about 
your  partner.  Besides,  sir,  I  hoped  it  would 
all  come  out  right." 

"  You  had  no  business  to  hope  anything  at  all 
about  it." 

"  I  have  done  the  best  I  knew  how,  sir.  As 
you  seem  to  be  dissatisfied  with  me,  I  don't  wish 
to  have  anything  more  to  do  with  the  matter. 
I  told  Mr.  Whippleton  I  wanted  to  leave  this 
morning.  I  am  ready  to  go  now." 

"  Go !  Do  you  want  to  leave  me  now,  when 
everything  is  in  confusion?" 

"  Yes,  sir ;  I  want  to  leave  if  you  are  not 
satisfied." 

"  I'm  not  satisfied ;  but  if  you  leave,  I  shall 
believe  that  you  are  a  party  to  the  villany  that 


160 

has  been  carried  on  in  the  counting-room.  I 
thought  you  were  on  very  intimate  terms  with 
Mr.  Whippleton,  your  employer,  sailing  with 
him,  and  spending  your  Sundays  on  the  lake 
with  him." 

"  I  never  was  in  a  boat  with  him  on  Sunday  in 
my  life,  sir,"  I  protested,  vehemently. 

"Well,  he  was  out  in  his  boat  every  Sunday, 
and  I  supposed,  as  you  went  with  him  at  other 
times,  you  did  on  Sundays." 

"  No,  sir ;  I  did  not.  He  was  very  kind  to  me, 
and  I  was  grateful  to  him  for  it." 

"  You  seem  to  be,"  sneered  the  dignified 
senior. 

"  He  treated  me  with  a  kindness  and  con 
sideration  which  I  never  received  from  his 
partner ;  and  I  shall  always  thankfully  remem 
ber  that,  whatever  else  in  him  I  may  desire  to 
forget,"  I  replied,  smartly,  for  I  was  cut  to  the 
soul  by  the  cold  and  harsh  words  and  manner 
of  Mr.  Collingsby,  after  I  had  exposed  the  ras 
cality  of  his  partner. 

"  No  impudence,  young  man." 

"I  should  like  to  leave  at  once,  sir." 

"You  can't  leave." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      161 

"I  think  I  can,  sir." 

"  If  you  do,  I  will  send  an  officer  after  you. 
In  my  opinion,  you  and  Whippleton  have  been 
altering  the  books  to  suit  your  own  purposes." 

"  It  looks  so,  after  I  have  called  your  atten 
tion  to  these  invoices  —  don't  it,  sir?"  I  replied, 
with  becoming  indignation. 

"  Why  didn't  you  speak  of  them  before,  then  ?  " 

"  Because  I  was  not  sure  that  anything  was 
wrong  till  last  night." 

"  Pray  what  did  you  discover  last  night  ? " 
asked  the  senior,  with  a  palpable  sneer. 

"I  discovered  that  Mr.  Whippleton  was  very 
anxious  to  raise  a  large  sum  of  money.  This 
morning  I  told  him  squarely  what  I  thought 
he  had  been  doing,  but  he  promised  to  con 
vince  me  that  it  was  all  right  this  afternoon.  But 
in  spite  of  all  he  said,  I  told  you  about  the  in 
voices  this  forenoon." 

"You  didn't  speak  soon  enough." 

"  While  you  are  reproaching  me,  Mr.  Whip 
pleton  is  raising  money  on  the  notes  of  the 
firm." 

"  And  you  want  to  desert  me  ! " 
11 


162 

"  1  do,  when  I  ain  accused  of  being  concerned 
in  his  frauds." 

"  Perhaps  I  was  hasty/'  added  Mr.  Collingsby, 
biting  his  lip.  "  I  did  not  mean  to  say  that 
you  profited  by  his  fraud." 

"  I  think  he  has  exposed  the  whole  thing/' 
said  Mr.  Faxon. 

"  We  will  consider  this  matter  at  another  time. 
What's  to  be  done?" 

"  Go  to  the  banks,  the  bankers,  and  the  brokers, 
and  find  Mr.  Whippleton,"  I  replied. 

"  Will  you  assist,  Mr.  Philips  ?  " 

"  I  will ;  but  I  should  like  to  go  to  St.  Louis 
to-night." 

"  We  will  see  about  that.  Call  a  carriage  for 
me,  Mr.  Faxon.  Now,  stop  him,  if  you  can. 
Have  him  arrested  1  The  villain  has  swindled 
me  out  of  seventy  or  eighty  thousand  dollars," 
continued  Mr.  Collingsby,  bustling  about  the 
room,  and  appearently  forgetting  that  he  was 
a  sick  man. 

Sore  as  I  felt  about  the  reproaches  which  had 
been  so  unjustly  heaped  upon  me,  I  was  inter 
ested  for  the  welfare  of  the  firm.  I  ran  all  the 
way  to  the  two  banks  where  we  did  our  business. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      163 

I  was  too  late.  At  the  two  Mr.  Whippleton  had 
discounted  about  twelve  thousand  dollars'  worth 
of  the  paper.  I  heard  of  him  at  several  banks 
and  offices,  and  as  the  notes  of  Collingsby  and 
Whippleton  were  as  good  as  gold  in  the  market, 
he  had  no  difficulty  in  negotiating  them.  Though 
I  could  not  follow  him  everywhere  that  he  had 
been,  I  was  satisfied  that  he  had  turned  the  notes 
into  cash.  I  could  not  find  him,  arid  I  went  to 
the  counting-room  for  instructions,  for  I  ex 
pected  to  find  the  senior  partner  there. 

"Have  you  seen  Mr.  Whippleton,  Robert?'7 
I  asked,  when  I  found  that  the  entry  clerk  was 
alone  in  the  counting-room. 

"  He  was  here  half  an  hour  ago." 

"  Where  is  he  now?" 

"  I  don't  know ;  he  didn't  say  anything,  but 
he  had  his  overcoat  on  his  arm." 

"Has  Mr.  Faxon  been  in?" 

"No;  only  Mr.  Whippleton.  What's  the  mat 
ter,  Phil?  Everybody  j^eems  to  be  in  a  stew 
to-day." 

"  There's  an  awful  row  brewing.  What  did 
Mr.  Whippleton  do?" 

"  He    went   to   the    safe,  and   looked   over   the 


164  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 


pages  of  one  of  the  books.  What's  the  mat 
ter?" 

"  He  has  been  using  the  money  of  the  firm 
for  his  own  speculations,  and  in  my  opinion 
he  means  to  run  away  with  all  the  cash  he  can 
put  his  hands  on." 

"  Whew  ! "  whistled  the  entry  clerk. 

"  Didn't  he  hint  where  he  was  going  ? " 

"  No ;  he  didn't  hint  that  he  was  going  any 
where  ;  but  I  thought,  from  his  having  his  over 
coat,  that  he  was  going  out  in  his  boat." 

It  occurred  to  me  that  he  would  be  more 
likely  to  leave  the  city  in  the  Fiorina  than  by 
any  other  conveyance.  He  could  sail  in  her 
when  he  pleased,  and  cover  up  his  tracks  very 
effectually.  I  promptly  decided  to  visit  the 
mouth  of  the  river,  where  he  kept  his  boat,  and 
see  if  she  was  there.  In  the  excitement  of  the 
morning,  I  had  almost  forgotten  the  treasure 
which  Mrs.  Whippleton  had  committed  to  my 
charge.  I  had  put  it  into  a  drawer  in  the  safe 
which  was  not  in  use.  I  had  locked  the  drawer, 
and  put  the  key  with  the  others.  I  had  sealed 
up  the  package,  and  written  my  own  name 
upon  it,  so  that  I  had  no  fear  it  would  be  taken 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      165 

by  the  junior  partner.  But  he  had  exhibited 
a  new  phase  of  character  on  this  eventful  day, 
and  I  trembled  as  I  unlocked  the  drawer.  My 
fears  were  realized.  The  package  was  gone. 
Mr.  Whippleton  had  taken  it. 

This  was  a  serious  catastrophe. 

I  felt  like  sinking  through  the  floor  when  I 
realized  the  loss.  If  it  had  been  nay  own  I  should 
have  felt  better.  It  was  a  sacred  trust  confided 
to  me,  and  I  reproached  myself  for  putting  it 
into  the  safe.  Under  ordinary  circumstances, 
however,  it  would  have  been  secure  there.  The 
treasure  had  been  given  to  me  in  order  to 
keep  it  from  him  into  whose  possession  it  had 
now  fallen. 

"What's  the  matter,  Phil?77  asked  Robert, 
when  he  saw  my  grief  and  chagrin. 

"  I  have  lost  a  valuable  package,"  I  replied. 

"  Was  it  done  up  in  white  paper  ?  " 

"Yes." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  took  it  from  one  of  the 
drawers,  and  put  it  in  his  pocket." 

"Did  he  open  it?"  I  asked. 

"  No  ;  not  here." 

I   thought  it  was  very  strange  that  he  should 


166  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

take  a  package,  marked  "  private,"  with  my  name 
upon  it.  But  nothing  that  he  did  could  now 
be  regarded  as  strange. 

"When  did  he  take  it?"  I  inquired. 

"  Early  this  morning  ;  as  soon  as  you  had  gone 
to  Mr.  Collingsby's." 

"The  first  time?" 

u  Yes  j  before  nine  o'clock." 

It  looked  to  me  then  just  as  though  the  vil 
lain  knew  the  contents  of  the  package. 

"If  Mr.  Whippleton  comes  in  again,  Robert, 
don't  lose  sight  of  him  for  an  instant.  Follow 
him  wherever  he  goes,  if  it  is  to  the  other  side 
of  the  continent." 


"Do  as  I  tell  you.  I  suppose  Mr.  Collingsby 
has  the  officers  on  his  track  by  this  time." 

"  You  don't  mean  so  !  " 

u  Certainly  I  do  ;  he  has  swindled  the  firm 
out  of  seventy  or  eighty  thousand  dollars  ;  fifty, 
at  least,  after  taking  out  his  capital  and  profits. 
If  Mr.  Collingsby  or  Mr.  Faxon  comes  in,  tell 
him  I  have  gone  over  to  see  where  the  boat  is." 

I  rushed  out  of  the  counting-room  almost 
frantic  with  excitement,  for  I  confess  that  the 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       167 

loss  of  the  package  which  had  been  specially 
committed  to  my  care  affected  me  much  more 
deeply  than  the  deficit  of  the  junior  partner. 
I  hurried  to  the  mouth  of  the  river,  and  ar 
rived  there  out  of  breath.  The  Fiorina  was 
not  at  her  moorings,  and  as  I  looked  out  upon 
the  lake,  I  discovered  her,  at  least  three  miles 
distant,  running  towards  the  Michigan  shore. 
I  had  no  doubt  that  the  valuable  package,  and 
from  thirty-five  to  forty  thousand  dollars  of  the 
firm's  money,  were  in  that  light  craft,  which  was 
flying  so  swiftly  over  the  waves. 

At  the  moorings  lay  Ben  Waterford's  boat ; 
but  her  sails  were  loosed,  and  she  seemed  to  be 
otherwise  prepared  for  a  cruise.  As  the  current 
swung  her  round,  I  saw  the  name  "  Marian/'  in 
beautiful  new  gilt  letters,  upon  her  stern.  It 
had  been  changed,  doubtless,  to  suit  the  altered 
circumstances  of  her  owner  •  but  I  sincerely 
hoped  that  Miss  Marian  would  never  become  the 
wife  of  so  reckless  and  unprincipled  a  man  as  I 
believed  Ben  Waterford  to  be. 

"  Here  is  your  father's  clerk.  He  will  go  with 
us,"  said  a  voice  behind  me. 

I    turned    and    saw    Waterford    attending    Miss 


168  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

Collingsby.  I  had  been  tempted  to  take  the 
Marian  without  leave  or  license,  and  give  chase 
to  the  Fiorina;  but  I  was  too  prudent  to  do  so. 
The  party  of  which  I  had  heard  Ben  speak  in 
the  morning  had  not  started  at  the  time  speci 
fied,  and  I  judged,  from  the  remark  he  made,  that 
Miss  Marian  was  carrying  out  her  resolution  not 
to  go  with  him  unless  there  was  a  party.  I 
hoped  they  would  not  go,  for  I  wanted  to  borrow 
the  boat,  and  I  applauded  the  young  lady's  firm 
ness  both  for  her  own  and  my  sake. 

"  Where  is  your  sister  ? "  asked  Miss  Col 
lingsby. 

"  I  don't  know.  She  promised  to  be  here  an 
hour  ago,"  replied  Mr.  Waterford.  "  Probably 
some  friend  has  arrived,  or  something  else  has 
occurred  to  prevent  her  keeping  her  engagement. 
But  here  is  Phil,  your  father's  clerk.  Won't 
you  go  if  I  take  him?" 

"  I  don't  like  to  be  the  only  lady,"  said  she, 
looking  upon  the  ground. 

"  We  shall  join  Mr.  Whippleton  in  a  little  while. 
He  has  two  ladies  on  board  with  him  —  the  Misses 
Lord." 

"Fiorina?" 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      169 

«  Yes." 

"  Very  well ;  if  you  can  overtake  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton,  and  get  Julia  Lord  to  go  with  us,  I  shall 
be  satisfied." 

"  Certainly ;  Julia  will  be  very  glad  to  sail 
with  you." 

"  But  the  clerk  must  go." 

That  meant  me ;  and  as  they  intended  to  over 
take  Mr.  Whippleton  as  soon  as  possible,  the 
arrangement  suited  me.  The  junior  partner  of 
our  firm  was  my  "  objective "  just  now,  and  I 
did  not  intend  to  lose  sight  of  him  until  he  had 
disgorged  his  ill-gotten  gains. 

"Will  you  go  with  us,  Phil?"  asked  Ben 
Waterford,  pleasantly. 

"I  shall  be  very  happy  to  do  so,  if  you  will 
put  me  in  the  way  of  seeing  Mr.  Whippleton. 
I  have  very  important  business  with  him,"  I 
replied. 

"  We  shall  join  him  at  once,-"  added  he,  as  he 
hauled  the  Marian  up  to  the  shore. 

While  he  assisted  Miss  Collingsby  to  her  seat, 
I  hoisted  the  mainsail,  and  in  a  few  moments 
we  were  standing  out  of  the  river. 


170  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 


CHAPTER    XV. 

IN  WHICH    PHIL  GOES  TO  WORK   IN   THE    COOK-ROOM   OF 
THE   MARIAN. 

"     A    LL   right,   Phil;    hoist   the  jib,"    said    Mr. 

/"\  Waterford,  as  soon  as  we  were  out  of  the 
river. 

I  cleared  away  the  jib  and  hoisted  it,  the  skipper 
hauling  aft  the  sheet,  and  trimming  the  sail.  The 
wind  was  from  the  westward,  rather  light  for  one 
who  was  fond  of  a  smashing  time  on  the  water, 
and  it  was  one  of  the  most  perfect  of  summer 
days.  The  Marian  was  headed  in  the  direction  of 
her  rival,  which  appeared  to  be  working  towards 
the  south-east  corner  of  the  lake.  My  impression 
was,  that  Mr.  Whippleton  intended  to  land  at  -this 
point,  and  take  a  train  to  the  east.  I  was  pre 
pared  to  follow  the  instruction  which  I  had  given 
the  entry  clerk,  and  pursue  the  fugitive  to  the 
other  side  of  the  continent. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      171 

This  boating  excursion  had  been  planned  by 
Waterford  and  our  junior  partner,  but  of  course  it 
was  not  possible  that  the  former  knew  the  pur 
poses  of  the  latter ;  at  least,  such  was  my  view  of 
the  matter  at  first,  though  I  afterwards  had  oc 
casion  to  change  my  mind.  I  was  satisfied  now, 
if  I  had  not  been  before,  that  Mr.  Whippleton 
meant  to  leave  Chicago  forever.  He  had  done  all 
the  mischief  in  his  power  there,  and  to  remain 
any  longer  would  result  in  a  mortifying  exposure. 
Like  other  smart  rogues,  he  had  gathered  together 
all  he  could,  and  was  going  to  some  distant  locality 
V)  enjoy  it. 

Miss  Collingsby  had  seated  herself  in  the  stern 
sheets  of  the  boat,  and  was  watching  the  waters 
that  rippled  under  the  counter.  I  thought  she 
was  not  very  well  satisfied  with  herself  for  what 
she  had  done,  and  rather  wished  herself  on  shore 
again.  If  she  knew  her  prudent  and  dignified 
father's  opinion  of  Mr.  Waterford,  it  would  not 
have  been  strange  that  she  was  dissatisfied  with 
herself. 

"  This  is  a  magnificent  day  for  a  sail,"  said  Mr. 
Waterford,  gayly,  as  he  glanced  at  his  fair  com 
panion. 


172  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  Elegant,"  replied  she,  but  in  a  tone  which  in 
dicated  that  she  was  not  in  the  full  enjoyment  of 
the  sail  or  the  day. 

"  Would  you  like  to  take  the  helm  and  steer, 
Miss  Collingsby?" 

"  No,  I  thank  you  ;  not  now." 

"  You  enjoyed  it  so  much  when  we  sailed  last 
time,  that  I  thought  you  were  cut  out  for  a  sailor." 

"  Half  the  pleasure  of  sailing  is  the  company 
you  have  with  you,"  added  Marian. 

"  And  you  think  you  are  losing  one  half  of  the 
pleasure  of  the  present  occasion  ?  "  said  Mr.  Wa- 
terford. 

"  I  did  not  say  that,  but  I  did  expect  a  lively 
party,  as  you  told  me  you  had  invited  half  a  dozen 
ladies  and  gentlemen." 

"  I  did ;  and  they  all  promised  to  come  if  it  was 
possible,"  pleaded  the  skipper.  "  I  am  very  sorry 
they  did  not,  and  that  you  are  so  much  dissatisfied 
with  your  present  company." 

"  Why,  no,  Mr.  Waterford ;  I  did  not  say  that, 
and  did  not  mean  it,"  interposed  Marian.  "  I  only 
say  that  half  the  fun  on  the  water  is  having  a  good 
lively  party.  You  know  what  a  nice  time  we  had 
singing  and  chatting  the  last  time  we  went." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      173 

"  We  had  a  pleasant  time.  I  thought,  from  what 
you  said,  that  you  considered  your  present  com 
pany  rather  disagreeable,  and  the  excursion  a 
failure." 

"  You  know  I  did  not  mean  any  such  thing  as 
that,  Mr.  Waterford,"  said  Marian,  reproachfully. 
"  You  are  very  kind  to  invite  me  at  all,  and  it  is 
very  ungrateful  for  me  to  say  anything ;  but  I  do 
like  a  lively  party." 

"  I  am  afraid  it  is  only  a  selfish  thing  on  my 
part,"  added  the  skipper,  as  he  bestowed  upon  his 
beautiful  companion  a  look  of  admiration,  beneath 
which  she  blushed  even  as  she  gazed  into  the 
clear  waters  of  the  lake.  "  Phil,"  called  he,  turn 
ing  to  me. 

"  Here,"  I  replied,  springing  up  from  my  reclin 
ing  posture  on  the  forward  deck. 

"  I  wish  you  would  hoist  the  new  burgee.  We 
ought  to  wear  our  gayest  colors  to-day." 

"Where  is  it?" 

"  In  the  cabin  after  locker,  starboard  side.  Run 
it  up,  if  you  please." 

I  went  into  the  cabin,  and  found  the  flag.  It 
was  a  gay  affair,  in  bright  colors,  with  the  new 
name  of  the  yacht  inscribed  upon  it.  I  attached 


174  DESK    AND   DEBIT,    OR 

it  to  the  halyards,  and  ran  it  up  to  the  mast-head. 
Miss  Collingsby  took  no  notice  of  it,  but  continued 
to  gaze  into  the  water. 

"  What  do  you  think  of  my  new  burgee,  Miss 
Collingsby  ?  "  asked  the  skipper. 

"  It  is  very  pretty  indeed/7  she  replied,  with 
more  indifference  than  it  seemed  quite  polite  to 
display.  "  It  is  as  gay  as  the  rest  of  the  boat. 
You  are  fond  of  bright  colors,  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  In  a  boat,  I  am.  Do  you  see  the  name  which 
is  upon  it?  " 

"  Marian  !  "  exclaimed  she,  after  spelling  out  the 
name  upon  the  flag.  "  What  does  that  mean  ?  " 

"  It  is  the  name  of  the  boat." 

"  Why,  the  last  time  I  sailed  in  her,  she  was 
called  the  Michigan." 

"  That  is  very  true,  but  she  is  called  the  Marian 
now,"  replied  Mr.  Waterford,  trying  to  look  very 
amiable  and  modest. 

"  That's  my  name." 

"  Certainly ;  and  that's  the  reason  why  I  gave  it 
to  my  boat." 

"  Indeed,  you  do  me  a  very  great  honor,  and  I 
am  grateful  to  you  for  it." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      175 

"  No ;  the  honor  is  done  to  me,  if  you  don't 
object  to  the  name." 

"  Of  course  I  cannot  object  to  my  own  name.'* 

"  You  may  object  to  having  it  upon  my  boat." 

"  It  is  a  very  beautiful  boat,  and  I  am  sorry  you 
did  not  give  it  a  better  name." 

"  There  is  no  better  or  prettier  name  in  the 
whole  world." 

"  I  don't  think  so." 

"  I  do,"  answered  Mr.  Waterford,  with  emphasis. 
I  was  sick  of  the  old  name  —  the  Michigan." 

"  Probably  you  will  soon  be  sick  of  the  new  one 
—  the  Marian,"  added  Miss  Collingsby,  still  gazing 
into  the  wf  MQT. 

"  Ne>^    i!  "  protested  the  gallant  skipper. 

* '  ^o.  afraid  you  will,  as  you  were  of  the  old 
on*.-' 

tl  Never,  Miss  Collingsby  !  Of  course  the  name 
itself  is  but  a  word,  but  the  association  will  cause 
me  to  cherish  it  forever." 

"  How  very  fine  yo\i  talk,  Mr.  Waterford  !  " 

"  But  I  say  just  what  I  mean,  and  utter  only 
what  is  nearest  to  my  heart." 

"It  is  a  pity  you  were  not  a  lawyer,  for  you 
always  make  out  a  very  good  case." 


176  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  I  am  afraid  I  should  only  succeed  as  a  lawyer 
when  I  was  interested  in  my  client,  as  in  the  pres 
ent  instance." 

"  How  long  will  it  be  before  we  overtake  Mr. 
Whippleton?  "  asked  Miss  Collingsby,  as  though 
she  deemed  it  prudent  to  change  the  conversation, 
which  I  thought  was  becoming  just  a  little  silly, 
as  such  talk  always  is  to  all  but  those  who  are 
immediately  interested. 

"  That  will  depend  upon  which  boat  sails  the 
fastest." 

"  You  always  said  the  Michigan  — 

"  No,  the  Marian,"  interposed  the  skipper. 
"  Please  to  call  the  boat  by  her  right  name." 

"  Well,  the  Marian  ;  you  always  said  she  was 
the  fastest  boat  on  the  lake." 

u  I  think  so,  though  she  has  never  had  a  fair 
trial  with  the  Fiorina." 

"  I  wish  you  would  hurry  her  up,  for  I  really 
wish  to  see  Julia  Lord,  and  have  her  in  the  boat 
with  me.  I  suppose  that  neither  Mr.  Whippleton 
nor  Fiorina  will  object  to  the  transfer." 

"  Perhaps  not.  If  any  one  has  the  right  to  ob 
ject,  I  am  the  person,"  replied  the  skipper,  in  a 
low  tone,  though  I  heard  what  he  said. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      177 

"  You  promised  to  provide  me  with  company,  or 
I  should  not  have  come/'  pouted  Miss  Collingsby, 
blushing. 

"  I  hoped  you  would  deem  me  sufficient  com 
pany." 

"  Why,  what  impudence  !  I  want  the  company 
of  young  ladies." 

"  But  you  don't  object  to  my  company  —  do 
you?" 

"  Certainly  not,  in  your  proper  place,  at  the 
helm  of  the  yacht." 

Though  I  was  not  skilled  at  all  in  woman's  ways, 
I  thought  the  fair  girl  was  struggling  between  two 
fires.  She  rather  liked  Mr.  Waterford,  on  the  one 
hand,  and  was  very  unwilling  to  commit  herself 
by  accepting  any  of  his  delicate  attentions,  or  by 
appearing  to  be  pleased  by  his  compliments.  In  a 
word,  I  thought  she  liked  him,  but  was  afraid  of 
him.  He  was,  as  I  have  before  intimated,  a  very 
good-looking  fellow,  elegant  and  agreeable  in  his 
manners  and  speech.  If  he  had  been  half  as  good 
as  he  looked,  he  would  have  been  worthy  the 
beautiful  girl  at  his  side.  It  was  not  very  difficult 
for  me  to  believe,  after  what  I  had  heard  her 
father  say,  that  she  had  been  warned  against  him, 
12 


178  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OE 

and  that  duty  and  inclination  were  struggling 
against  each  other  in  her  mind. 

"  It  is  half  past  eleven,  Phil,"  said  Mr.  Water- 
ford,  consulting  his  watch.  "  Shall  we  have  any 
dinner  to-day  ?  " 

"  Certainly,  if  you  desire  it,"  I  replied,  present 
ing  myself  before  the  skipper  in  the  standing-room. 

"  Whippleton  says  you  are  a  cook,  Phil.  Is 
that  so?" 

"  I  can  cook,"  I  replied,  modestly. 

"  Can  you  get  up  a  dinner  fit  for  a  lady  ? " 
laughed  Mr.  Waterford. 

"  I  can  roast,  bake,  boil,  broil,  and  fry.  If  the 
lady  will  be  suited  with  any  of  these,  I  will  do  the 
best  I  can  to  please  her." 

"  I  thought  you  were  my  father's  clerk,"  added 
Miss  Collingsby, 

"I  am." 

"  How  do  you  happen  to  know  how  to  cook, 
then?" 

"  1  was  brought  up  on  the  upper  Missouri,  where 
we  had  to  do  our  own  cooking." 

"  Yes,  Phil  is  a  regular  Indian  fighter,"  laughed 
the  skipper. 

"  What,  this  young  man  ?  " 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      179 

"  Yes,  he  has  shot  a  thousand  Indians  in  his  day, 
and  scalped  them  ?  " 

«  Phil  ?  " 

"Call  it  two  or  three,"  I  added.  "And  we 
never  were  in  the  habit  of  scalping  them." 

"  Don't  spoil  a  good  story,  Phil." 

"  We  used  to  speak  the  truth  in  the  woods,  even 
when  we  were  joking." 

"  Well,  don't  be  too  severe  on  us.  We  only 
speak  the  truth  here  when  we  are  addressing 
ladies." 

"  Just  reverse  the  proposition,  and  it  would  be 
more  correct/'  said  Marian. 

u  What  shall  we  have  for  dinner  ?  "  I  asked. 

"  Miss  Collingsby  must  settle  that  point,"  an 
swered  the  skipper. 

"  Give  us  a  fricandeau  de  veau,  and  beignets  de 
pommel 

11  Nous  n'avons  pas  des  pommes"  I  replied. 

"  Is  it  possible  !  Do  you  speak  French  ? "  ex 
claimed  Miss  Collingsby. 

"  Unpeu." 

"  Of  course  I  did  not  mean  what  I  said,"  laughed 
the  gay  young  lady.  "  I  will  have  just  what  you 


180  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

happen  to  have.  I  did  not  think  any  one  would 
understand  what  I  said." 

"  I  certainly  did  not/7  added  Mr.  Waterford.  "  I 
know  no  language  but  English,  and  only  a  little  of 
that." 

"  I  think  I  can  make  a  fricandeau"  I  continued, 
lt  if  I  have  the  material." 

"  We  have  beef,  ham,  mutton,  pork,  potatoes, 
bread,  cake,  and  crackers  on  board." 

"  Let  us  have  a  plain  beefsteak,  then,"  said  the 
lady. 

"  Avec  pommes  de  terre,  frits  ?  "  I  asked. 

"  Ouij  Monsieur  Cuisinier.  What  a  prodigy  you 
must  be,  Mr.  Phil !  You  can  keep  books,  cook, 
and  talk  French." 

"  And  sail  a  boat  as  well  as  the  best  of  them," 
added  Mr.  Waterford.  "  By  the  way,  Phil,  have 
you  any  of  those  things  on  board  that  you  men 
tioned  ?  " 

"  What  things  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know." 

" Pommes  de  terre"  suggested  Miss  Collingsby. 

11  You  said  we  had.  I  haven't  looked  over  the 
Btores." 

"  I  said  so  ?    Not  if  I  was  awake." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      181 

"  You  stupid  !  "  laughed  the  lady.  "  They  are 
potatoes." 

"  0,  are  they  ?  Then  we  have  plenty  of  them. 
They  say  that  a  rose  by  any  other  name  smells  as 
sweet ;  and  I  suppose  a  potato  in  any  other  lan 
guage  tastes  the  same.  Very  well.  Get  up  a 
good  dinner,  Phil ;  one  fit  for  a  queen  —  for  a 
queen  is  to  eat  it." 

"  How  silly ! "  said  Miss  Collingsby,  as  I  went 
below. 

u  Better  and  fairer  than  any  queen." 

"  I  declare,  Mr.  Waterford,  you  are  becoming 
insufferable.  I  shall  have  to  go  down  there  and 
help  Phil  get  dinner.  Besides,  I  want  to  talk 
French  with  him.  And  I  want  to  see  the  kitchen." 

I  passed  through  the  cabin  into  the  little  cook- 
room,  in  the  forecastle,  where  I  lighted  the  fire. 


182  DESK  AND   DEBIT,   OB 


CHAPTER    XVI. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL    PROMISES  NOT   TO    DESERT  MISS   COL- 
LINGSBY. 

IF  I  had  not  been  so  anxious  to  overtake  Mr. 
Whippleton,  I  should  have  enjoyed  my  occu 
pation  in  the  cook-room  of  the  Marian  much  bet 
ter.  Being  in  a  boat  at  all  was  a  very  pleasant 
thing  to  me ;  a  place  in  the  cook-room  was  still 
better;  while  a  seat  in  the  standing-room,  with 
one  hand  on  the  tiller,  in  charge  of  the  craft,  was 
the  most  delightful  recreation  which  the  earth  had 
yet  presented  me.  The  kitchen  of  the  Marian 
was  substantially  the  same  as  that  of  the  Fiorina, 
where  I  had  cooked  a  great  many  suppers.  I 
knew  where  to  find  everything  without  being  told, 
and  I  was  at  home  at  once. 

In  looking  over  the  stores,  I  found  what  seemed 
to  me  to  be  a  month's  supply.  I  knew  that  Mr. 
Waterford  had  expected  a  party  of  half  a  dozen ; 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      183 

but  the  provision  lockers  contained  enough  to  dine 
a  hundred.  There  was  a  great  quantity  of  sub- 
stantials,  such  as  pork,  ham,  potatoes,  and  beef.  I 
thought  he  had  been  very  lavish  for  a  party  for  a 
single  day.  The  bin  for  charcoal,  which  was  the 
fuel  used  in  the  stove,  was  filled  full. 

I  selected  a  nice  slice  of  beefsteak,  and  pro 
ceeded  to  cut  up  the  potatoes  1  was  to  fry.  I  was 
soon  very  busy,  and  wholly  absorbed  in  my  occu 
pation.  I  enjoyed  it,  and  though  it  may  not  be 
the  highest  ambition  to  be  a  cook,  it  is  a  very 
useful  employment.  There  is  an  art  about  cook 
ing  ;  and  as  I  fried  the  potatoes,  I  thought  it  re 
quired  just  as  much  science  as  it  did  to  keep  a  set 
of  books.  If  I  had  had  Mrs.  Whippleton's  treasure 
safe  in  my  possession,  I  should  have  been  superla 
tively  happy.  I  cooked  all  the  potatoes  I  thought 
would  be  required  for  dinner,  even  giving  Miss 
Collingsby  credit  for  an  unfashionably  good  appe 
tite.  The  tea-kettle  was  boiling,  and  I  was  just 
going  to  fill  up  the  coffee-pot,  when  a  shrill  scream 
startled  me,  and  dissolved  the  spell  which  the  de 
lights  of  my  occupation  had  woven  around  me. 

It  was  the  voice  of  a  lady,  and  of  course  it 
could  be  no  other  than  that  of  our  beautiful  pas- 


184  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

senger.  At  first  it  occurred  to  me  that  the  boon, 
had  swung  over,  and  hit  her  upon  the  head  ;  but 
the  boat  was  still  heeled  over  to  the  leeward,  as 
she  had  been  for  the  last  hour;  and  I  knew  that 
the  boom  could  not  go  over  unless  the  boat  came 
up  to  an  even  keel.  Then  it  flashed  upon  me  that 
either  the  skipper  or  his  fair  companion  had  fallen 
overboard.  But  I  did  not  wait  to  discuss  prob 
abilities  or  possibilities  ;  I  hastened  on  deck,  pass 
ing  through  the  fore  scuttle,  which  I  had  opened 
to  give  me  air  and  light. 

When  I  reached  the  deck,  I  was  satisfied  that 
the  boom  had  not  been  the  author  of  the  mischief, 
and  that  neither  of  the  parties  had  fallen  over 
board.  The  Marian  still  held  her  course  towards 
the  south-east,  and  the  skipper  and  the  lady  were 
both  in  the  standing-room,  though  not  in  the  same 
position  that  I  left  them  half  an  hour  before.  Mr. 
Waterford  was  at  the  helm,  of  course  ;  but  Miss 
Collingsby  was  seated  as  far  from  him  as  the  limits 
of  the  seats  would  permit.  I  went  aft,  and  saw 
that  the  fair  young  lady  was  very  red  in  the  face, 
and  apparently  very  angry.  I  was  puzzled  at  the 
situation,  and  quite  unable  to  explain  it. 

"  Is  dinner  ready,  Phil  ?  "  asked  Mr.  Waterford. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      185 

"Not  yet." 

"  Well,  hurry  it  up.  We  are  growing  hungry," 
added  the  skipper ;  but  I  saw  that  his  desire  to 
get  rid  of  me  was  greater  than  his  appetite. 

"  I  heard  a  scream  here,"  I  replied,  determined 
not  to  be  put  out  of  the  way,  if  my  presence  or 
my  assistance  was  needed. 

"  No,  you  didn't.  That  was  nothing.  Miss  Col- 
lingsby  was  singing  on  the  high  notes." 

I  glanced  at  her.  She  did  not  look  cheerful 
enough  to  sing,  but  angry  enough  to  touch  the 
high  notes,  though  not  the  melodious  ones. 

•'  I  will  go  down  and  see  you  cook,  Phil,"  said 
she,  with  a  struggle  to  appear  composed,  though 
it  was  not  a  success. 

I  descended  to  the  cabin,  and  turned  to  assist 
her  down  the  steps. 

"  Stop  a  few  moments,  Miss  Collingsby,  if  you 
please,"  interposed  Mr.  Waterford.  "  I  wish  to 
speak  to  you." 

"  I  will  come  up  again,"  she  replied,  leaping 
lightly  upon  the  cabin  floor. 

"  I  am  afraid  you  will  find  the  cook-room  rather 
hot  for  you,"  I  added,  as  I  led  the  way  forward. 

I  opened  the  door  into  the  kitchen,  and  gave  her 


186  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

a  seat  within  the  cabin,  where  she  could  observe 
all  that  was  done.  I  fancied,  however,  that  she 
did  not  care  much  just  then  how  beefsteak  and 
sliced  potatoes  were  cooked  on  board  of  a  yacht, 
and  that  she  only  desired  to  escape  from  the  pres 
ence  of  the  gallant  skipper. 

I  put  the  beefsteak  upon  the  stove.  I  had  set 
the  table  after  preparing  the  potatoes,  and  I  had 
nothing  to  do  but  watch  the  meat. 

"  That  is  a  real  nice  little  place,  Phil,"  said  Miss 
Collingsby  ;  and  her  tones  indicated  that  she  had 
not  yet  recovered  her  self-possession. 

"  It  is  rather  small,  though  it  is  as  roomy  as  any 
yacht  of  this  size  can  have." 

"  I  think  it  is  quite  cool,  with  that  scuttle  open." 

"  I  don't  mind  the  heat ;  but  I  am  used  to  it." 

"Do  you  think  we  shall  overtake  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton,  Phil  ?  "  asked  she,  after  a  pause,  during  which 
I  turned  the  steak. 

"  I  don't  think  we  have  gained  on  her  any  yet," 
I  replied. 

"  I  don't  believe  he  means  to  catch  her,"  added 
my  fair  companion,  with  a  very  anxious  expression. 

"  We  are  certainly  following  the  Fiorina,  though 
we  are  at  least  three  miles  from  her.  I  don't 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      187 

think  we  shall  overhaul  her  till  she  comes  about, 
or  makes  a  harbor." 

There  was  another  pause  :  and  when  I  saw  how 
anxious  Miss  Collingsby  was,  I  could  not  help  feel 
ing  a  strong  sympathy  with  her.  The  scream  had 
not  yet  been  explained  to  me ;  but  I  concluded 
that  the  gallant  skipper  had  alarmed  her  by  being 
too  demonstrative  in  his  attentions. 

"Do  you  know  where  we  are  going?"  she 
inquired. 

"  I  do  not ;  only  that  we  are  to  join  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton." 

"  I  wish  I  was  on  shore  again/'  said  she,  with  a 
sigh. 

"  Why  ?  "  I  asked,  in  the  simplicity  of  my  heart ; 
for  I  thought,  if  she  was  fond  of  sailing,  that  she 
ought  to  enjoy  the  trip,  for  certainly  nothing  could 
be  pleasanter. 

"  I  have  been  very  imprudent.  I  ought  not  to 
have  come,"  she  replied,  in  a  low  tone. 

"  Did  you  scream  ?  "  I  ventured  to  inquire,  in  a 
whisper. 

"  I  did." 

"  What  was  the  matter?" 


188  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  I  have  been  very  imprudent,"  she  repeated, 
her  face  glowing  with  confusion. 

"  I  hope  he  didn't  harm  you." 

"  0,  no  !  He  didn't  mean  to  harm  me  )  but  he 
was  impudent  and  insulting.  I  will  never  speak 
to  him  again,  as  long  as  I  live  ! " 

"  Of  course  your  father  knew  you  were  coming 
with  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  No ;  he  did  not ;  but  my  mother  did.  My 
father  is  very  stern,  and  very  particular,  I  suppose 
you  know.  He  hates  Mr.  Waterford,  while  my 
mother  thinks  he  is  a  very  fine  man.  But  my 
mother  told  me  not  to  come  with  him  unless  there 
were  other  ladies  in  the  party." 

"  He  seems  to  have  a  very  high  regard  for  you," 
said  I.  "  He  has  named  his  boat  after  you." 

"  But  I  have  been  very  imprudent,  Phil.  I  am 
afraid  of  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  You  need  not  be  afraid  of  him.  I  will  see  that 
no  harm  comes  to  you,  and  that  you  return  home 
safely." 

"  You  are  my  father's  clerk  —  are  you  not?" 

"I  am." 

"  I  saw  you  at  the  house  this  morning ;  and  I 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      189 

have  heard  that  you  were  a  very  good  young  man. 
You  will  not  let  him  harm  me." 

"  Certainly  not." 

She  was  really  terrified,  though  I  could  not  see 
any  good  reason  for  her  fears. 

"  You  must  be  very  watchful,  too/'  she  added. 

"  Why,  what  do  you  fear  ?  " 

"  He  means  to  get  rid  of  you,"  she  answered, 
her  face  crimson  with  blushes. 

"  To  get  rid  of  me  !  "  I  exclaimed. 

"He  said  so  to  me.  You  will  not  expose  my 
weakness,  if  I  tell  you  all,  Philip  ?  "  said  she,  the 
tears  starting  in  her  beautiful  eyes ;  and  really  I 
felt  like  crying  myself. 

"  Not  a  word,  nor  a  hint,"  I  protested. 

"  Mr.  Waterford  has  been  very  attentive  to  me 
for  a  year ;  and  I  confess  that  I  liked  him.  But 
my  father  said  he  was  an  unprincipled  man." 

"  Your  father  was  right." 

"  I  fear  he  was.  Mr.  Waterford  asked  me,  sev 
eral  weeks  ago,  to  run  away  with  him,  and  be  mar 
ried  in  some  town  on  the  other  side  of  the  lake. 
I  was  weak  enough  to  listen  to  him,  but  not  to 
accept  his  proposition.  He  repeated  it  to-day,  and 
with  some  familiarity  which  frightened  me,  and 


190 

made  me  scream.  I  never  was  so  alarmed  before 
in  my  life." 

"What  did  he  do?" 

"  He  put  his  arm  around  me,  and  attempted  to 
kiss  me/'  said  she;  desperately.  "  Now  you  know 
the  worst." 

I  did  not  think  it  was  so  bad  as  it  might  be, 
after  she  had  encouraged  him  by  listening  to  his 
proposals. 

"  He  is  a  bad  man.  I  begin  to  be  of  my  father's 
opinion  in  regard  to  him." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  is  another  bad  man/'  I  added. 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  !    What,  my  father's  partner  ?  " 

At  the  risk  of  letting  the  beef  be  burned,  I  told 
her  briefly  the  history  of  the  man,  and  that  he 
was  even  then  running  from  the  officer,  while  I 
was  in  pursuit  of  him. 

"  Dear  me  !  What  will  become  of  me ! "  she 
exclaimed. 

"  Don't  be  afraid  of  anything.  I  will  protect 
you." 

"  But  you  don't  know  the  worst ! " 

"Do  you?" 

"I  think  I  do.  He  has  decoyed  me  into  this 
boat,  and  he  means  to  get  rid  of  you.  He  told  me 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      191 

so.  Then  he  will  take  me  to  some  town  on  the 
lake,  if  he  can  persuade  me  to  accept  his  proposal. 
Don't  leave  me,  Phil !  Don't  let  him  get  rid  of 
you!" 

"I  will  not." 

"  I  think  I  understand  him  perfectly,  now ;  and 
I  feel  very  miserable  to  think  I  disregarded  the 
instructions  of  my  mother.  He  will  persecute  me 
till  I  consent  to  his  proposal,"  continued  the  poor 
girl,  wiping  away  her  tears.  "I  shall  depend 
upon  you  for  my  safety.  Philip." 

"  I  will  not  fail  you,  Miss  Collingsby.  I  do  not 
mean  to  lose  sight  of  Mr.  Whippleton,  and  I  have 
no  idea  of  being  thrust  out  of  the  way,"  I  replied, 
as  I  dished  up  the  beefsteak,  and  put  the  plate  on 
the  table. 

"  Dinner  is  ready,"  I  shouted,  when  I  had  placed 
the  potatoes  and  coffee  on  the  table. 

My  mission  below  for  the  present  was  accom 
plished,  and  I  went  on  deck  by  the  fore  scuttle.  I 
looked  for  the  Fiorina  as  soon  as  I  went  up,  and 
found  that  she  had  hauled  her  wind,  and  was 
standing  towards  the  Illinois  shore  of  the  lake.. 
The  Marian  had  followed  her  example.  I  saw  the 
former  enter  a  creek  soon  after,  where  she  disap- 


192  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

peared  from  our  view.  I  knew  the  locality  very 
well,  for  I  had  been  up  the  creek  in  the  Fiorina 
with  Mr.  Whippleton.  The  mouth  of  it  was  a 
broad  lagoon,  which  extends  into  a  series  of 
swamps. 

"  Take  the  helm,  Phil,"  said  Mr.  Waterford,  as  I 
walked  aft  to  the  standing-room.  "  Is  dinner  on 
the  table?" 

"Yes,  all  ready." 

"  Head  her  into  the  creek,  Phil,  and  we  will  land 
there,"  added  he,  as  he  went  below,  leaving  me  in 
charge  of  the  yacht. 

I  could  not  help  thinking  that  Miss  Collingsby 
was  more  frightened  than  hurt.  She  was  certainly 
a  beautiful  girl,  and  was  sure  to  have  a  princely 
dowry  when  she  was  married.  I  could  not  blame 
Mr.  Waterford  for  wanting  her,  and  I  was  confi 
dent  Mr.  Colliugsby  would  never  consent  to  such 
a  match.  Without  appearing  to  be  suspicious,  I 
intended  to  watch  the  skipper  closely,  and  if  he 
attempted  to  get  rid  of  me,  he  would  find  it  would 
take  two  to  make  that  bargain. 

Before  the  interesting  couple  in  the  cabin  had 
finished  their  dinner,  I  ran  the  Marian  into  the 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       193 

creek.  When  the  skipper  came  on  deck,  he  imme 
diately  anchored  the  yacht,  near  the  south  bank 
of  the  lagoon.  After  I  had  eaten  my  dinner,  he 
took  the  small  boat,  and  wished  me  to  go  on  shore 
with  him,  as  Miss  Collingsby  declined  to  land. 
13 


194 


CHAPTER    XVII. 

IN  WHICH    PHIL   PUTS    A    CHECK    ON   THE    OPPERATIONS 
OF   MR.    BEN   WATERFORD. 

MR.  WATERFORD  had  anchored  the  Marian 
within  a  couple  of  rods  of  the  shore,  where 
there  was  a  bank  convenient  for  landing.  He  had 
simply  lowered  the  jib,  leaving  the  mainsail  set, 
but  with  the  boom  hauled  down  to  the  traveller, 
to  keep  it  from  swaying.  Miss  Collingsby  did  not 
come  on  deck  when  she  had  finished  her  dinner, 
but  sat  in  the  cabin,  apparently  reading  a  book 
she  had  found  there ;  but  I  think  her  mind  was 
not  interested  in  the  contents  of  the  volume. 

"  Come,  Phil ;  will  you  go  on  shore  with  me  ? ?l 
repeated  Mr.  Waterford,  after  he  had  hauled  the 
little  tender  alongside  the  yacht. 

"  I  haven't  cleared  away  the  dishes  yet/'  I 
replied. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      195 

"  Never  mind  them  now ;  there  will  be  time 
enough  for  that  when  we  return." 

"  But  everything  in  the  kitchen  is  just  as  I 
left  it,"  I  added. 

"  We  shall  not  be  absent  more  than  ten  or 
fifteen  minutes." 

"  Can't  you  go  alone  ?  " 

"  No,  but  you  can,"  he  replied,  with  a  winning 
smile,  which  was  doubtless  intended  to  lure  me 
into  the  trap  he  had  set  for  me.  "  There  are  some 
beautiful  swamp  flowers  a  short  distance  from  the 
shore,  and  I  wish  to  get  a  bouquet  for  Miss  Col- 
lingsby." 

"  Can't  one  carry  the  bouquet  alone  ?  "  I  asked. 

"  You  are  a  stout  fellow ;  possibly  you  could," 
laughed  he.  "  If  you  will  go,  I  will  tell  you  where 
to  find  the  flowers." 

"  If  you  know,  it  would  be  better  for  you  to  go, 
and  I  will  clear  away  the  dinner  things  while  you 
are  gone." 

u  We  must  pull  the  tender  out  of  the  water 
when  we  land,  and  I  don't  think  I  can  do  it  alone. 
I  want  to  turn  it  over,  and  get  the  dirty  water  out 
of  it,  for  it  really  is  not  fit  for  a  lady  to  get  into. 
Miss  Collingsby  says  she  is  not  afraid  to  stay  alone 
for  a  few  moments." 


196  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

"  Very  well ;  if  you  will  stay  on  board  and  put 
away  the  dishes,  I  will  go  on  shore  alone,"  I  re 
plied,  moved  to  give  this  answer  by  a  whispered 
suggestion  from  Miss  Marian. 

"  All  right ;  but  can  you  turn  the  boat  over  alone  ?  " 

"  Certainly  I  can ;  that  boat  don't  weigh  more 
than  seventy-five  pounds." 

Miss  Collingsby  immediately  came  on  deck,  and 
went  to  the  side  where  the  tender  was  lying. 

"  I  think  I  will  go  with  you,  Mr.  Phil,"  said  she. 
"  I  should  like  to  see  where  the  flowers  grow." 

"  But  that  boat  is  not  fit  for  a  lady  to  get  into  in 
its  present  condition,"  interposed  Mr.  Waterford, 
annoyed  by  this  new  phase  of  our  lady  passen 
ger's  will. 

"  It  will  answer  very  well  for  me,"  she  replied. 

"  Indeed,  I  cannot  permit  you  to  get  into  that 
boat;  but  if  you  wish  to  land,  we  will  take  it 
ashore  first,  and  empty  out  the  dirty  water." 

"  O,  no  !  1  won't  give  you  all  that  trouble," 
added  she,  retreating  to  the  cabin  again. 

"  I  will  go  down  and  put  out  my  fire,  and  then  1 
shall  be  ready,"  I  continued,  following  her  below. 

"  Don't  leave  me,  Phil,"  said  Marian,  earnestly, 
but  in  a  low  tone. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      197 

"  If  you  will  trust  the  matter  to  me,  I  will 
manage  it  right/'  I  replied.  "  But  I  wish  to  let 
him  have  his  own  way  for  the  present." 

"  But  you  see  now  that  he  wants  to  leave  you 
on  shore." 

"  I  have  no  doubt  of  that;  still  I  wish. to  go  on 
shore  with  him.  You  may  be  assured  that  no 
accident  shall  happen  to  you/7  I  answered,  as  I 
rattled  the  stove  to  convince  the  skipper  that  I 
was  busy  at  the  work  I  had  come  below  to  do. 

"  I  am  terribly  alarmed.  All  Mr.  Waterford's 
looks  and  actions  convince  me  that  he  means 
mischief." 

"  I  know  he  does ;  he  has  fully  satisfied  me  on 
that  point.  But  will  you  leave  the  whole  matter 
to  me?" 

"  Yes ;  but  do  be  very  cautious." 

"  I  shall  go  on  shore  with  him." 

"  Then  he  may  leave  you  there." 

"  No ;  he  cannot  do  that.  1  will  watch  him ; 
and  I  can  swim  off  to  the  boat  before  he  can 
hoist  the  jib  and  get  under  way.  Trust  me,  Miss 
Collingsby." 

"  I  do  trust  you ;  but  he  may  deceive  you." 

"  He  will  if  he  can.     I  cannot  afford  to  be  left 


198  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

here,  for  I  have  business  with  Mr.  Whippleton  for 
your  father's  sake,  as  well  as  my  own.'7 

"You  seem  to  understand  yourself  very  well; 
but  Mr.  Waterford  is  very  sharp." 

"  Perhaps  I  am ;  at  any  rate,  he  will  not  leave 
me  on  shore." 

"  Are  you  ready,  Phil  ?  "  shouted  the  skipper,  at 
the  companion-way ;  and  I  began  to  think  he  was 
a  little  suspicious  of  my  movements. 

"  All  ready,"  I  replied,  and  hastened  on  deck. 

I  pulled  off  my  coat,  and  left  it  in  the  yacht,  so 
that,  in  case  I  had  to  swim;  I  should  be  the  less 
encumbered. 

"  Throw  a  bucket  into  the  boat,  so  that  you  can 
wash  out  the  tender,"  said  the  skipper. 

"  I  don't  know  that  I  can  haul  the  boat  up  that 
bank  alone,  after  all,"  I  added,  looking  at  the  shore. 

"  I  don't  think  you  can ;  my  plan  is  the  most 
sensible  one.  We  will  both  go." 

He  jumped  into  the  boat,  and  I  followed  him. 
Taking  one  of  the  oars,  he  paddled  the  tender  to 
the  shore,  and  we  landed.  Mr.  Waterford  was  evi 
dently  a  thorough  strategist,  for  he  went  through 
all  the  forms  of  doing  what  he  had  proposed.  We 
hauled  the  boat  out  of  the  water,  removed  every 
thing  movable,  and  then  turned  her  over. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      199 

"  Now,  Phil,  those  swamp  flowers  grow  about 
ten  rods  from  here,  on  the  bank  of  a  little  brook. 
Follow  that  path,  and  you  will  come  to  the  place," 
said  he,  pointing  into  the  swamp.  "  While  you 
are  getting  them,  I  will  wash  out  the  boat.  But 
don't  be  gone  long,  for  I  can't  put  the  boat  into 
the  water  without  your  help." 

I  thought  he  could  put  it  into  the  water  with 
out  my  help,  and  that  he  would  do  it  as  soon  as  I 
was  out  of  sight.  I  went  into  a  clump  of  bushes 
near  the  spot  where  he  stood,  intending  to  watch 
his  movements,  for  I  wished  to  be  entirely  satisfied 
that  he  meditated  treachery.  1  wished  to  be  able 
to  justify  myself  for  any  step  I  might  be  compelled 
to  take. 

I  did  not  think  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  would  have 
undertaken  his  present  desperate  scheme  if  he 
had  not  received  some  encouragement  from  Miss 
Collingsby.  She  confessed  to  me  that  she  had 
listened  to  him  once  before,  when  he  suggested 
an  elopement ;  but  she  was  now,  as  she  began  to 
reap  the  fruits  of  complaisance,  convinced  of  her 
own  imprudence.  It  was  necessary  for  the  bold 
schemer  to  get  rid  of  me  ;  and  he  was  prepared  to 
part  company  with  me  in  the  most  summary  man- 


200  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

ner.  If  he  could  do  so,  it  was  possible  that  he 
might  win  or  drive  his  fair  passenger  into  com 
pliance  with  his  proposition.  She  would  be  rich 
at  some  time  in  the  future  ;  but  more  than  this, 
she  was  beautiful  and  accomplished.  Her  father 
would  not  consent  to  her  union  with  such  a  char 
acter  as  Waterford.  He  could  only  win  her  by 
such  a  bold  movement  as  that  upon  which  he  had 
already  entered. 

I  had  not  been  in  the  bushes  three  minutes 
before  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  suddenly  changed  his 
tactics.  The  boat  seemed  to  be  no  longer  unfit 
for  the  reception  of  a  lady,  and  he  shoved  it  down 
the  bank  into  the  water,  as  though  he  had  sud 
denly  been  endowed  with  a  new  strength.  Of 
course  I  expected  him  to  do  this ;  and  before  he 
could  pick  up  the  oars,  I  stepped  out  of  my  cov 
ert,  and  was  prepared  to  leap  into  the  boat  with 
him ;  for,  though  the  day  was  warm  and  pleasant, 
I  had  no  fancy  for  swimming  off  to  the  Marian. 

"  Where  are  the  flowers  ?  "  demanded  he,  with 
some  wrath,  which  he  could  not  wholly  conceal, 
and  apparently  taken  all  aback  by  my  sudden 
reappearance. 

"  I  didn't  find  them,"  I  replied,   with  a  good- 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      201 

natured  smile,  for  I  was  not  a  little  pleased  at  the 
checkmate  I  had  put  upon  my  fellow-voyager. 

"Did  you  look?" 

"  Not  much." 

"  Why  didn't  you  ?  We  don't  want  to  stay  here 
all  day,"  said  he,  unable  to  hide  his  chagrin. 

"  I  am  ready  to  go  when  you  are." 

"  Why  didn't  you  get  the  flowers?"  growled  he. 

"  To  tell  the  whole  truth,  I  was  afraid  you 
would  forget  that  I  was  on  shore,  and  go  on  board 
without  me,"  I  answered,  laughing. 

"  You  blockhead  !  What  do  you  mean  by  that  ?  " 

"  I'm  compelled  to  believe  you  have  a  bad 
memory ;  and  I  fear  you  forgot  to  invite  the  rest 
of  the  ladies  included  in  your  programme.  You 
might  forget  me,  in  the  same  manner,  and  this 
wouldn't  be  a  good  place  to  stay." 

"  You  are  growing  impudent,  Phil." 

"  No ;  only  prudent." 

"  Come  with  me,  you  lunkhead,  and  I  will  show 
you  where  the  flowers  are,"  said  he,  rushing  to 
wards  the  path,  as  though  he  meant  to  obtain  the 
flowers  or  die  in  the  attempt. 

"  If  you  know  where  they  are,  you  can  get  them 
alone,"  I  added. 


202  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OB 

"  I  do  know  where  they  are.  You  seem  to 
think  I  am  playing  a  trick  upon  you ;  and  I  want 
to  show  you  that  I  am  not." 

u  I  don't  think  you  will  be  able  to  show  me  that 
if  I  go  ;  so  I  may  as  well  stay  here." 

"  Come  along  !  " 

"  I  don't  think  you  washed  the  boat  out  very 
nicely.  You  didn't  have  time  to  do  it,  and  you 
didn't  give  me  three  minutes  to  find  and  pick  the 
beautiful  flowers." 

"  What  is  the  matter  with  you,  Phil?  You  seem 
to  have  changed  your  face  all  of  a  sudden.  What 
ails  you  ?  " 

"  Nothing  at  all ;  never  was  in  better  health  in 
my  life,  thank  you." 

"  Why  didn't  you  get  the  flowers,  then,  as  you 
said  you  would  ?  " 

"  I  didn't  say  so ;  you  said  it.  I  should  have 
got  them,  if  I  hadn't  been  afraid  you  would  forget 
I  was  on  shore,  and  go  on  board  without  me." 

"  What  put  that  into  your  silly  head  ?  " 

"You  did." 

"  No,  I  didn't." 

"  I  don't  like  to  contradict  a  gentleman ;  but  I 
had  not  gone  three  rods  before  you  shoved  the 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      203 

boat  into  the  water,  without  troubling  yourself  to 
wash  it  out." 

"What  were  you  watching  me  for?"  de 
manded  he. 

"  Because  I  was  afraid  you  would  forget  me,  as 
I  said." 

"  What  do  you  mean  ?  What  makes  you  so 
suspicious  ?  " 

"  Your  conduct ;  nothing  else." 

"What  have  I  done?" 

"  You  tried  to  get  rid  of  me,  and  intended  to 
leave  me  here  in  this  inhospitable  swamp,  away 
from  any  human  habitation,  and  with  nothing  in 
eight  but  the  railroad  and  the  lake." 

"  What  put  such  a  notion  as  that  into  your 
head,  Phil  ?  " 

"  I  have  come  to  the  conclusion  that  you  think 
there  is  one  too  many  for  the  present  cruise  in  the 
Marian.  I  should  not  have  come,  if  you  had  not 
been  so  kind  as  to  invite  me ;  and  now  I  don't  in 
tend  to  be  left  in  this  swamp." 

"  Nobody  thought  of  leaving  you  in  the  swamp." 

"  Then  you  are  nobody  —  which  it  is  not  polite 
to  say." 

"  Come,  Phil,  we  have  been  good  friends,  and 
we  won't  quarrel  now." 


204  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  I  won't,  if  I  can  help  it." 

"  Let  us  walk  up  to  the  place  where  the  flowers 
grow,"  said  he,  leading  the  way. 

I  followed  him;  but  I  deemed  it  advisable  to 
keep  at  a  respectful  distance  from  him.  His 
only  purpose  was  to  get  rid  of  me,  and  I  did  not 
believe  that  he  would  be  very  scrupulous  about 
the  means  of  doing  so.  I  did  not  think  he  would 
attempt  to  murder  me,  or  anything  of  that  sort; 
but  Miss  Collingsby,  and  Miss  Collingsby's  ex 
pectations,  were  the  prize  for  which  he  was  play 
ing.  I  followed  him  about  twenty  rods  from  the 
boat,  but  without  seeing  anything  which  looked 
like  flowers.  Indeed,  I  had  landed  here  before ; 
and  I  should  as  soon  have  thought  of  looking  for 
flowers  in  the  Desert  of  Sahara  as  in  this  region. 

Mr.  Ben  Waterford  seated  himself  on  a  little 
hummock,  and  looked  as  though  he  had  something 
more  to  say.  He  did  not  seem  to  be  in  any  hurry, 
though  Miss  Collingsby  was  alone  on  board  of  the 
yacht;  and,  as  the  Fiorina  was  also  in  the  lagoon, 
1  could  afford  to  wait  as  long  as  he  could ;  so  I 
seated  myself  on  another  hummock  near  him. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      205 


CHAPTER  XVIII. 

IN   WHICH    PHIL    PROTESTS    WITH    THE   BOAT-HOOK,   BUT 
IS   PROTESTED. 

P^HIL,  you  are  aware,  I   suppose,  that  I  am 

JL  engaged  to  Miss  Collingsby,"  Mr.  Ben 
Waterford  began. 

"  I  must  acknowledge  my  own  ignorance.  I 
was  not  aware  of  it,"  I  replied. 

"It  is  so." 

"  Was  that  what  made  her  scream  while  I  was 
getting  dinner  ?  " 

11  Scream  !     She  didn't  scream  !  " 

"I'm  not  deaf." 

"  She  only  uttered  an  exclamation." 

"  You  said  she  was  singing ;  but  I  always 
suppose  something  is  the  matter  when  ladies 
utter  exclamations  in  just  that  way." 

"  You  are  saucy  and  impudent." 


206 

"  Very  likely  it  is  impudent  for  me  to  see  and 
hear  what  I  ought  not  to  see  and  hear." 

"  But  haven't  you  any  gumption  ?  " 

"  Just  now  you  accused  me  of  having  too  much 
gumption.  Somehow  I  don't  think  this  is  half 
so  pleasant  a  party  on  the  lake  as  you  repre 
sented  that  it  would  be." 

"  Will  you  hear  me  ?  " 

"  Certainly  I  will ;   go  on." 

"  I  told  you  I  was  engaged  to  Miss  Collings- 
by.  One  does  not  like  to  talk  about  these  things, 
I  know  —  but  —  " 

"Then  the  less  said  the  better/'  I  interposed, 
laughing. 

"  You  said  you  would  hear  me." 

"I  will;   go  on." 

"  I  want  you  to  understand,  in  the  first  place, 
that  I  am  engaged  to  Miss  Collingsby,"  he  con 
tinued,  with  a  pause,  to  note  the  effect  upon 
me. 

"  You  have  said  that  three  times ;  but  I  don't 
believe  I  shall  be  able  to  understand  it  if  you 
say  it  three  times  more." 

"Do  you  doubt  my  word?" 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      207 

"I  only  say  that  my  understanding  is  defec 
tive  on  that  point." 

"  I  think  I  ought  to  know." 

"  So  ought  Miss  Collingsby ;  but  she  don't.  I'm 
afraid  she  is  as  stupid  as  I  am." 

"  Do  you  mean  to  say  that  she  has  denied  it  ?  " 

"  Not  exactly.  I  don't  know  that  I  ever  had 
anything  to  do  with  parties  that  were  engaged; 
but  I  don't  believe  the  lady  screams,  or  utters 
exclamations,  if  you  please,  and  then  rushes 
into  the  cabin  to  get  out  of  the  way  of  the  gentle 
man  to  whom  she  is  engaged.  As  I  said,  I  don't 
understand  these  things ;  but  I  don't  believe 
that's  the  way  they  are  done." 

"  You  are  a  blockhead,  Phil." 

"  I  know  it.  My  head  is  so  hard  you  can't 
get  any  of  that  sort  of  nonsense  into  it." 

"  I  see  that  you  are  disposed  to  quarrel  with 
me." 

"  Not  at  all,  Mr.  Waterford,"  I  protested.  "  If 
you  consider  this  cruise  a  failure,  I  am  will 
ing  to  go  on  board  of  the  yacht  and  return  to 
Chicago." 

"Do  you  know  who  owns  that  yacht?"  said 
he,  sternly. 


208  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

"  Of  course  I  do.     I  wish  /  did,  but  I  don't." 

"  I  judged  from  your  talk  that  you  thought  she 
belonged  to  you." 

"  That  happiness  is  not  mine.  I  wish  it  was. 
But  her  gentlemanly  owner  was  kind  enough 
to  invite  me  to  sail  with  him ;  and  I  don't  intend 
to  deprive  him  of  the  pleasure  of  my  company 
until  we  return  to  Chicago.  I  think  it  would 
be  mean  to  do  so." 

"  I  wish  to  remind  you  that  I  claim  the  right 
to  choose  my  own  company." 

"  To  be  sure  ;  and  you  exercised  it  when  you 
invited  Miss  Collingsby  and  myself  to  sail  with 
you." 

"But  having  changed  my  mind  after  your 
strange  conduct,  I  may  decline  your  company 
any  longer." 

"It  would  be  very  proper  to  decline  it  after 
we  return  to  the  city." 

"  I  may  find  it  necessary  to  refuse  to  take  you 
on  board  again." 

"  You  would  not  leave  me  in  this  desolate 
place  ?  " 

"  If  you  don't  behave  yourself,  I  may." 

"  If  you  do,  I  shall  protest." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      209 

"  Protest !  "  sneered  he. 

"  Perhaps  I  might  even  protest  with  the  boat- 
hook,"  I  added ;  "  for  such  a  step  on  your  part 
would  be  an  outrage." 

"  You  are  smart  for  a  boy." 

"  I  did  not  exactly  force  myself  into  your 
boat,  though  I  was  very  glad  to  go  in  her,  for 
I  expected  by  this  time  to  meet  Mr.  Whippleton." 

"  I  wanted  to  tell  you  what  my  purpose  was," 
said  he,  making  another  effort  to  approach  the 
subject  which  he  had  tried  to  introduce  before. 

"  I  think  I  know  what  your  purpose  was." 

"Do  you,  indeed?" 

"  I  do,  indeed." 

"  Perhaps  you  would  be  willing  to  state  it." 

"  To  save  you  the  trouble  of  doing  so  in  your 
roundabout  way,  I  will.  You  intended  to  run  away 
with  Miss  Collingsby.  You  deceived  her,  lied 
to  her,  and  thus  induced  her  to  come  on  board 
of  your  yacht.  You  asked  me  only  because  she 
would  not  go  alone  with  you." 

"Did  she  tell  you  that?"  demanded  he,  bit 
ing  his  lip,  and  trying  to  subdue  his  rising 
wrath. 

"  No  matter  what  she  told  me  ;  I  am  not  blind. 
14 


210  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

You  told  her  you  would  join  Mr.  Whipple ton's 
party,  and  that  the  two  Miss  Lords  were  on  board 
of  his  boat.  I  saw  her  when  she  came  in  here, 
and  he  was  alone." 

"  The  ladies  were  in  the  cabin,  I  suppose." 

11  Mr.  Whippleton  is  alone :  he  does  not  wish 
for  any  company  to-day." 

"  What  do  you  mean  by  that  ? "  he  asked, 
evidently  suspecting  that  I  was  wiser  than  I 
ought  to  be. 

"  Miss  Collingsby  is  alone  on  board  of  the 
Marian.  I  am  afraid  she  will  be  uneasy  if  you 
remain  here  any  longer.  If  you  are  engaged 
to  her,  she  must  be  very  anxious  about  you." 

"  Don't  be  ugly  and  disagreeable,  Phil.  You 
are  a  good  fellow.  No  one  knows  it  better  than 
I  do.  Now  let  us  fix  this  thing  up." 

"  I'm  too  thick  to  understand  you." 

"  You  are  a  good  fellow,  and  I  know  you  will 
help  me  out  of  this  scrape,"  he  continued,  sud 
denly  looking  cheerful  and  pleasant,  as  though 
the  whole  difficulty  had  been  solved. 

"  If  you  will  do  the  right  thing,  I  will  help  you 
out  of  it." 

"  I  knew  you  would.     You  understand  the  mat- 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      211 

ter.  I  do  love  Miss  Collingsby,  and  she  will 
tell  you  herself  that  she  is  not  indifferent  to 
me.  She  consented  some  time  ago  to  elope 
wi:h  me,  in  my  boat.  We  can  run  over  to  Lan 
sing,  St.  Joseph,  or  some  other  town  on  the  east 
side  of  the  lake,  be  married,  and  return  a  happy 
couple.  Since  we  are  both  agreed  on  this  step, 
you  are  not  hard-hearted  enough  to  step  between 
us.  Her  mother  is  willing,  but  her  father,  you 
know,  is  a  stiff  and  unreasonable  man.  It  will 
be  all  right  with  him  when  we  return." 

"  Has  Miss  Collingsby  consented  to  this  step  ?  " 
I  asked. 

"  She  consented   to  it  once  before,  and  if  the 

v 

way  is  open  she  will  not  object.  Of  course  girls 
are  coy  about  these  things.'7 

"  I  have  been  told  they  are/'  I  replied,  in 
differently. 

"  Now  you  will  help  me  out,  Phil  —  won't 
you?" 

"  I  will,"  I  added,  rising  from  my  seat. 

"  That's  a  good  fellow ;  and  you  shall  never 
want  for  a  friend.  By  the  way,  a  smart  book 
keeper,  like  yourself,  ought  to  have  double  the 
salary  you  are  receiving  now ;  and  I  will  see  that 


212 

you  have  a  better  place  as  soon  as  we  return. 
Whippleton  says  you  are  worth  a  thousand  dol 
lars  a  year." 

"  Thank  you." 

"  And  I  will  make  it  my  whole  business  to  see 
that  you  have  such  a  situation.  Now  I  think 
of  it,  our  bank  wants  a  book-keeper,  and  will 
pay  twelve  hundred  a  year.  I  can  almost  prom 
ise  you  the  place." 

"  You  are  very  kind,  and  I  am  much  obliged 
to  you." 

"  I  will  make  it  all  right  within  three  days 
after  we  come  back.  We  can  run  over  to  St. 
Joseph,  as  the  wind  is  now,  before  night.  Then 
the  knot  can  be  tied,  and  we  shall  be  back  to 
morrow  night,  or  the  next  day  ;  or,  if  you  don't 
wish  to  be  absent  from  your  business  so  long, 
all  you  have  to  do  is  to  wait  here  till  Whippleton 
comes  down  in  the  Fiorina,  and  go  on  board  of 
her.  He  will  take  you  right  back  to  Chicago 
before  dark.  What  do  you  think  of  my  plan  ? " 
he  asked,  nervously. 

"  The  plan  is  good  enough,  but  it  won't  work." 

"  What's  the  reason  it  won't  ?  " 

"  Well,  I  object,  for  one  reason." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      213 

"  You  object !  Permit  me  to  say,  it  is  none 
of  your  business." 

"  Isn't  it  ?  Well,  I  thought  it  was,  after  your 
elaborate  argument  to  convince  me.  Miss  Col- 
lingsby  objects  also." 

"  No,  she  does  not.  Don't  I  tell  you  that  she 
consented  to  elope  with  me?" 

"I  know  you  do;  but  I  don't  believe  it  —  to  be 
as  frank  as  the  occasion  requires." 

"  Do  you  doubt  my  word  ?  " 

"  We  won't  quarrel  about  anybody's  word. 
If  Miss  Collingsby  will  tell  me  herself  that  she 
consents  to  your  plan,  I  will  stay  on  shore  here, 
or  go  to  St.  Joseph  with  you,  just  as  you  desire." 

"  Of  course  she  is  not  going  to  talk  with  you 
about  such  a  matter.  Girls  are  timid.  You 
said  you  would  help  me  out  of  this  scrape, 
Phil." 

"  And  so  I  will,  with  the  greatest  pleasure." 

"  What  do  you  mean,  then,  by  saying  that  you 
object  ?  " 

"  I  want  to  help  you  out  of  the  scrape,  and 
not  into  it.  That's  what  I  mean.  Let  us  re- 
turn  to  Chicago,  and  that  will  get  you  out  of 
the  scrape." 


214 

"  Do  you  think  I  am  to  be  made  a  fool  of  by 
a  boy  like  you?"  said  he,  rising  and  stepping 
towards  me. 

"  I  hope  not ;  I  assure  you  I  have  no  such 
wicked  intention.7' 

"  You  have  said  enough,  Phil." 

"  That's  just  my  opinion ;  and  I  would  like 
to  amend  it  by  adding  that  you  also  have  said 
enough." 

"  Whether  you  help  me  or  not,  I  want  you 
to  understand  that  I  intend  to  carry  out  my 
plan." 

"  Not  if  I  can  help  it.  I  want  to  be  under 
stood,  too." 

"  The  Marian  belongs  to  me,  and  I  can  dis 
pense  with  your  company." 

"  Send  Miss  Collingsby  on  shore,  and  you  may 
do  so.  I  claim  to  be  her  protector,  and  I  intend 
to  stand  by  her  to  the  end." 

"  Protector  !  You  blockhead  !  "  sneered  he. 
"  Pray,  who  made  you  her  protector  ?  " 

"  She  did,  for  one ;  and  I  happen  to  be  a 
relative  of  hers,  which  is  an  additional  reason 
why  I  should  not  permit  any  one  to  mislead 
her." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       215 

"  How  long  have  you  been  a  relative  ?  " 

"  Ever  since  I  was  born,  of  course." 

"  Of  course  you  are  lying." 

"  I  am  not  recognized  as  a  relative ;  but  no 
matter  for  that.  I  feel  just  as  much  interest  in 
her  as  though  she  was  my  own  sister." 

"  I  am  going  on  board  of  the  boat  now,"  said 
Mr.  Water  ford,  gathering  himself  up. 

"  So  am  I." 

"No,  you  are  not  —  on  board  of  my  boat. 
There  comes  the  Fiorina,"  he  added,  pointing 
to  Mr.  Wliippleton's  yacht,  which  was  coming 
down  the  lagoon  before  the  wind.  "  You  had 
better  hail  her." 

"  I  shall  not.  My  present  business  is  to  take 
care  of  Miss  Collingsby.  When  she  is  safe,  I 
have  business  with  Mr.  Whippleton." 

"  I  tell  you  once  for  all,  that  you  shall  not 
put  your  foot  on  board  the  Marian  again." 

Mr.  Waterford  walked  towards  the  place 
where  we  had  landed,  and  I  followed  him 
closely  enough  to  prevent  him  from  stealing  a 
march  upon  me.  As  the  matter  now  stood,  he 
would  attempt  to  prevent  me  from  getting  into 
the  boat.  I  intended  to  insist,  and  a  battle 


216  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

seemed  to  be  imminent.  The  Fiorina  stood 
over  towards  the  opposite  side  of  the  creek, 
apparently  for  the  purpose  of  giving  the  Marian 
a  wider  berth.  I  could  see  that  Mr.  Whippleton 
was  alone  in  the  standing-room,  and  I  was  con 
fident  that,  if  he  had  any  ladies  on  board,  they 
would  not  stay  in  the  cabin. 

Mr.  Ben  Waterford  stepped  into  the  tender, 
after  he  had  pushed  it  down  the  bank  so  that 
it  would  float.  I  picked  up  the  boat-hook,  which 
lay  on  the  ground,  because  I  thought  it  was 
not  a  proper  place  to  leave  it.  With  this  im 
plement  in  my  hand,  I  stepped  lightly  into  the 
boat. 

"  I  told  you  not  to  come  on  board  of  my  boat," 
said  Mr.  Waterford,  angrily. 

"I  know  you  did.  I  am  sorry  to  intrude, 
but  I  must.  If  you  will  land  Miss  Collingsby, 
I  will  relieve  you  of  my  company." 

<•  I  will  not  land  Miss  Collingsby.  Now  get 
out  of  this  boat ! "  he  added,  taking  up  one  of 
the  oars. 

"  You  must  excuse  me." 

"  I'll  excuse  you,'7  cried  he,  rushing  upon  me 
with  the  oar. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      217 

I  defended  myself  with  the  boat-hook,  and  being 
the  cooler  of  the  two,  I  did  so  with  tolerable 
success.  He  struck  and  thrust  furiously  with 
his  weapon,  till  he  was  out  of  breath ;  and  I 
was  also,  besides  having  had  two  or  three  hard 
raps  on  the  head  and  arms  with  his  weapon.  A 
desperate  lunge  knocked  me  over  backwards, 
and  I  fell  over  the  bow  of  the  boat  upon  the 
beach.  I  felt  that  I  was  defeated,  and  that  I 
had  promised  Miss  Collingsby  more  than  I  had 
thus  far  been  able  to  perform.  With  this  ad 
vantage  over  me,  Mr.  Waterford  pushed  me  back 
with  the  oar,  and  then  endeavored  to  shove  off 
the  tender. 

My  catastrophe  seemed  to  have  defeated  all 
my  good  intentions ;  and  as  I  went  over,  I  heard 
Miss  Collingsby  utter  a  shrill  scream,  as  though 
she  were  the  sufferer,  instead  of  myself,  as,  in 
deed,  she  was  likely  to  be. 


218  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 


CHAPTER    XIX. 


WEIGHS    ANCHOR    IN    THE    MARIAN. 

MORE  than  once  in  my  eventful  career  I 
have  realized  that  neither  success  nor  de 
feat  is  what  it  appears  to  be.  While  Mr.  Ben 
Waterford  was  congratulating  himself  upon  the 
victory  he  had  apparently  achieved,  and  I  was 
mourning  over  the  defeat  involved  in  my  catas 
trophe,  neither  of  us  had  foreseen  the  end.  Miss 
Collingsby  appeared  to  be  the  greatest  sufferer; 
and  the  scream  with  which  she  announced  my  de 
feat  was  only  the  echo  of  my  own  feelings.  As 
the  battle  was  really  her  own,  rather  than  mine, 
of  course  my  misfortune  was  the  greater  catas 
trophe  to  her. 

I  lay  upon  my  back  on  the  ground,  just  as  I  had 
tumbled  over  the  bow  of  the  tender.  But  I  did 
not  lie  there  any  great  length  of  time  —  perhaps 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      219 

not  the  hundredth  part  of  a  second.  But  there 
are  times  when  one  can  think  of  a  great  deal  in 
the  hundredth  part  of  a  second ;  and  I  am  sure 
my  thoughts  were  very  busy  during  that  infinites 
imal  period.  My  reflections  were  not  selfish,  and 
it  did  not  occur  to  me  that  Mr.  Whippleton  was 
escaping  from  me  and  from  the  wrath  to  come  — 
only  that  my  fair  cousin  would  be  at  the  mercy  of 
my  conqueror. 

This  was  the  pungent  regret  of  the  moment; 
and  it  seemed  to  me  that  I  ought  not  to  stay  con 
quered.  I  had  left  my  coat  on  board  of  the  yacht 
in  order  to  be  able  to  swim  if  occasion  should 
require ;  and  I  voted  unanimously  that  the  oc 
casion  did  require  that  I  should  take  a  muddy 
bath  in  the  service  of  the  young  lady.  My  first 
care  was  to  get  up.  In  doing  so,  I  felt  the  painter 
of  the  boat  under  me.  It  seemed  to  have  been 
left  there  when  the  tender  was  pushed  into  the 
water  to  suggest  my  next  step.  It  did  suggest  it, 
and  I  hastened  to  profit  by  the  advantage. 

As  I  began  to  get  up,  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  began 
to  push  off  the  boat ;  and  I  had  just  time  to  seize 
the  rope  before  it  was  dragged  into  the  water.  I 
picked  it  up,  and  promptly  checked  the  operations 


220  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

of  the  angry  skipper.  I  checked  them  rather 
suddenly.  Mr.  Waterford  was  at  the  stern  of  the 
boat ;  and  as  he  raised  his  oar  to  give  it  another 
push,  I  gathered  up  all  my  strength,  and  made  a 
desperate  twitch  at  the  rope. 

As  every  one  knows  who  has  had  anything  to 
do  with  them,  boats  are  wretchedly  unsteady  to  a 
person  in  a  standing  position.  Even  an  old  sailor 
may  find  it  impossible  to  maintain  his  perpendicu 
larity  when  the  boat  is  unexpectedly  moved. 
Philosophically,  the  inertia  of  the  man  should  be 
gradually  overcome,  and  suddenly  overcoming  the 
inertia  of  the  boat,  as  practice  and  the  formula 
have  both  demonstrated,  does  not  overcome  that 
of  the  man.  If  he  be  not  prepared  for  the  change 
from  rest  to  motion,  he  is  in  very  great  danger  of 
being  thrown  down,  and  if  near  the  water,  of 
being  thrown  into  it. 

The  body  of  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  was  not  proof 
against  the  law  of  nature.  It  followed  the  rule 
deduced  by  practical  men  from  the  phenomena  of 
every-day  experience,  and  the  formula  laid  down 
by  those  learned  in  physics.  When  I  twitched 
the  rope,  I  suddenly  and  violently  overcame  the 
inertia  of  the  tender.  Though  without  any  malice 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      221 

on  my  part,  the  inertia  of  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  was 

not  overcome  at  the  same  time.  His  tendency 
was  to  remain  at  rest,  and  the  consequence  was, 
that  I  pulled  the  boat  out  from  under  him.  Fur 
thermore,  as  there  was  water  where  the  boat  had 
been  when  I  pulled,  because  two  bodies  cannot 
occupy  the  same  space  at  the  same  time,  the  body 
of  Mr.  Waterford  went  into  the  water  —  the 
muddy,  dirty  water  of  the  lagoon  —  stirred  up  by 
the  oar  with  which  he  had  pushed  off  the  tender. 

Divested  of  the  language  of  science,  the  fact 
was,  that  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  had  tumbled  over 
backward  into  the  creek.  In  substance,  he  had 
repeated  the  experiment  at  the  stern  of  the  boat 
which  I  had  tried  at  the  bow,  only  he  had  fallen 
into  the  water,  and  I  had  fallen  upon  the  land.  In 
spite  of  preferences  for  the  water,  I  must  acknowl 
edge  that  the  land  is  a  pleasanter  element  to  fall 
upon  than  the  water,  especially  if  the  water  is 
dirty,  for  a  gentleman  instinctively  abhors  filth. 

I  protest  that  I  had  rut  intended  to  pitch  Mr. 
Ben  Waterford  into  the  lagoon.  Although  I  was 
familiar  with  the  law  of  physics  applicable  to  his 
case,  I  could  not  foresee  what  measure  of  resist 
ance  he  would  offer  to  the  action  of  the  formula, 


222  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

or  what  degree  of  caution  he  would  use.  Without 
any  premeditation  on  my  part,  —  for  I  solemnly  de 
clare  that  I  only  intended  to  prevent  him  from 
pushing  off  the  tender,  —  it  was  an  accomplished 
fact  that  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  was  floundering  in 
the  muddy  water  of  the  lagoon,  while  the  tender 
was  absolutely  in  my  possession. 

I  could  not  quarrel  with  fate,  destiny,  good  for. 
tune,  or  whatever  it  was  that  had  turned  the  tide 
in  my  favor  at  the  very  moment  of  defeat ;  and  I 
made  haste  to  profit  by  the  circumstances  as  I 
found  them.  I  ran  along  the  bank  of  the  creek, 
dragging  the  boat  after  me ;  and  by  the  time  the 
unhappy  skipper  had  elevated  his  head  above  the 
surface  of  the  foul  pool,  now  rendered  doubly  foul 
by  his  own  movements  upon  the  soft  bottom,  1  had 
the  tender  a  couple  of  rods  from  him.  He  was  in 
no  danger  of  drowning ;  for  while  I  should  say 
that  he  was  sunk  half  way  up  to  his  knees  in  the 
mud,  the  tiny  wavelets  rippled  against  the  gold 
vest  chain  to  which  his  watch  was  attached.  In 
other  words,  the  water  was  not  quite  up  to  his 
armpits.  I  do  not  know  whether  Mr.  Waterford 
was  able  to  swim  or  not :  I  never  saw  him  swim, 
acd  he  did  not  swim  on  this  momentous  occasion. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      22$ 

He  simply  stood  up  in  the  water,  rubbing  the 
muddy  fluid  out  of  his  eyes.  He  had  not  yet  suf 
ficiently  recovered  from  the  shock  of  his  fall,  and 
the  muddy  blindness  which  surrounded  him,  to 
realize  the  nature  of  the  situation. 

At  a  safe  distance  from  his  convulsive  clutch,  I 
jumped  into  the  tender,  and  paddled  rapidly  to  the 
yacht.  I  gave  Mr.  Waterford  a  wide  berth,  and 
left  him  trying  to  obtain  a  better  vision  of  the 
surroundings.  I  leaped  upon  the  deck  of  the 
Marian,  and  fastened  the  painter  of  the  tender  at 
the  taffrail.  Miss  Collingsby  spoke  to  me,  but  I 
heeded  not  what  she  said,  and  sprang  forward  as 
fast  as  I  could  move  my  steps.  I  hauled  up  the 
anchor,  but  without  waiting  to  wash  off  the  mud, 
or  stow  the  cable,  I  hastened  to  the  helm.  Let 
ting  out  the  sheet,  I  "  wore  ship,"  and  in  half  a 
minute  the  Marian  was  standing  out  of  the  lagoon. 

"  Stop !  What  are  you  about !  "  shouted  Mr. 
Ben  Waterford,  who  was  paddling  through  the 
mud  towards  the  shore. 

I  made  no  reply  to  him,  for  I  had  nothing  to 
say.  Between  running  away  from  him  arid  per 
mitting  him  to  run  away  with  Miss  Collingsby,  I 


224  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

was  compelled  to  choose  the  less  of  the  two  evils. 
)*Iy  mission  was  to  save  the  young  lady,  and  I 
intended  to  do  so.  I  had  made  a  faithful  use  of 
the  opportunity  presented  to  me ;  and  after  at 
tempting  to  leave  me  in  that  desolate  place,  I 
thought  it  was  not  unreasonable  for  Mr.  Waterford 
to  "  try  it  on  "  himself,  even  if  the  yacht  did  be 
long  to  him.  I  was  not  disposed  to  weigh  all  the 
nice  questions  which  the  situation  presented.  It 
was  clearly  my  duty  to  assist  Miss  Collingsby,  and 
I  was  disposed  to  do  it  without  consulting  the 
comfort  and  convenience  of  Mr.  Waterford,  who 
meditated  the  mischief  against  her. 

The  defeated  skipper  continued  to  shout  at  me 
in  the  most  furious  manner,  threatening  me  with 
all  the  terrors  of  the  law  and  his  own  wrath.  I 
was  willing  to  refer  the  whole  subject  to  Mr.  Col 
lingsby  after  we  returned  to  Chicago ;  and  I  re 
garded  him  as  an  all-sufficient  defender  against 
both  the  law  and  the  wrath  of  Mr.  Waterford.  I 
saw  him  make  his  way  to  the  shore,  shake  the  mud 
anrl  water  from  his  garments,  and  then  hasten  to  a 
point  of  land  which  projected  out  into  the  lake  at 
the  mouth  of  the  creek.  But  he  might  as  well 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       22o 

have  hastened  towards  the  other  end  of  the  lake, 
for  long  before  he  could  reach  it,  I  had  passed  the 
point,  and  was  out  in  the  open  lake. 

I  was  out  of  hailing  distance  of  the  unhappy 
skipper  when  he  reached  the  point,  though  I  could 
still  see  his  violent  gestures.  Miss  Collingsby  sat 
in  the  standing-room,  watching  her  late  persecutor 
with  anxious  interest.  Perhaps  she  feared  he 
might,  by  some  foul  mischance,  undo  what  I  had 
done  ;  that  he  might  annihilate  the  waste  of  waters 
before  him,  and  step  between  her  and  me.  I  had 
no  such  fears.  There  were  no  boats  or  vessels 
near  us,  and  I  was  satisfied  that  Mr.  Waterford 
would  be  obliged  to  walk  several  miles  to  a  station 
on  the  railroad  which  passed  through  the  swamp 
and  over  the  lagoon. 

I  was  so  well  satisfied  with  the  good  fortune 
that  grew  out  of  my  catastrophe,  that  I  soon  neg 
lected  to  think  of  Mr.  Ben  Waterford.  I  left  him 
to  enjoy  his  own  reflections ;  and  I  hoped  one  of 
them  would  be,  that  villany  could  not  long  prosper 
even  in  this  world.  I  wished  that  he  might  recall, 
if  he  had  ever  heard  of  it,  the  Scotch  poet's  prov 
erb,  that 

15 


226  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  The  best  laid  schemes  o'  mice  an'  men 

Gang  aft  a-gley, 

An'  lea'e  us  nought  but  grief  and  pain 
For  promised  joy." 

This  bit  of  romance  was  not  likely  to  end  in  a 
marriage,  thanks  to  the  returning  or  awaked  sense 
of  Miss  Collingsby. 

I  ceased  to  think  of  my  discomfited  skipper, 
and  turned  my  thoughts  to  Mr.  Charles  Whipple- 
ton,  to  whom  I  devoted  my  whole  attention.  The 
Fiorina  had  passed  out  of  the  creek  in  the  midst 
of  the  encounter  between  Waterford  and  myself; 
and  the  junior  partner  of  our  firm  must  have  seen 
me  when  I  was  pitched  over  the  bow  of  the  ten 
der.  Whether  he  had  been  able  to  see  the  issue 
of  the  battle  or  not,  I  did  not  know,  for  his  yacht 
passed  beyond  the  point  before  it  was  terminated. 
The  Fiorina  was  headed  to  the  eastward,  and  I 
judged  that  she  was  about  a  mile  ahead  of  me 
when  I  tripped  the  anchor  of  the  Marian.  I  in 
tended  to  chase  him  even  into  the  adjoining  lakes, 
if  he  led  me  so  far.  I  meant  to  recover  Mrs. 
Whippleton's  treasure,  if  it  took  me  all  summer, 
and  used  up  all  the  money  I  had  in  the  world. 

Marian  Collingsby  looked  very  sad  and  anxious, 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       227 

Her  chest  heaved  with  emotion  as  she  realized 
how  serious  was  the  movement  upon  which  we 
had  entered.  I  was  confident  that,  if  she  ever 
reached  the  shelter  of  her  father's  roof,  she  would 
never  be  imprudent  again ;  that  she  would  have 
more  regard  for  her  father's  solid  judgment  than 
for  her  own  fanciful  preferences. 

"  You  don't  know  how  frightened  I  was,  Philip," 
said  she,  when  I  took  my  place  at  the  helm. 

"I  don't  wonder.  I  was  frightened  myself;  but 
it  was  more  for  you  than  for  me,"  I  replied,  as  I 
let  out  the  main  sheet. 

"  But  what  a  terrible  fight  you  had  with  him  !  " 
exclaimed  she,  with  something  like  a  shudder. 

"  0,  that  was  nothing  !  "  I  replied,  laughing,  in 
order  to  encourage  her. 

"  Nothing !  Why,  he  struck  at  you  with  the 
oar  !  " 

"  And  I  struck  at  him  with  the  boat-hook.  I 
have  been  in  a  worse  fight  than  that." 

'-  You  have  !  " 

"  Yes ;  I  have  been  where  the  bullets  flew  thick 
and  fast.'-' 

"  You  !  " 

"  I  was  in  a  battle  with  the  Indians ;  and  I  once 


228  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

had  the  happiness  to  rescue  a  young  lady  from  the 
savages  ;  so  I  think  this  is  a  very  mild  kind  of 
fighting." 

"  What  a  hero  you  have  been  !  " 

"Not  much  of  a  hero;  but  I  don't  like  to  see 
anything  go  wrong  with  a  young  lady.  I  never 
saw  a  young  lady  till  I  was  twelve  years  old,  and 
I  find  myself  very  kindly  disposed  towards  all  of 
them  —  strange  as  it  may  seem." 

Miss  Collingsby  tried  to  smile,  but  she  did  not 
feel  able  to  do  so. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       229 


CHAPTER  XX. 

IN   WHICH   PHIL   SAILS    THE   MARIAN   ACROSS    LAKE 
MICHIGAN. 


are  you  going  now,  Philip?"  asked 
Miss  Collingsby. 

"  I  am  obliged  to  chase  Mr.  Whippleton.  I  told 
you  what  he  had  been  doing.  He  has  swindled 
your  father  out  of  a  large  sum  of  money,  and  he 
has  also  robbed  me  of  a  valuable  package,  which 
was  put  in  my  care  for  safe  keeping.  I  must 
catch  him  if  I  follow  him  all  night." 

"  You  are  very  faithful  to  my  father's  interests. 
I  didn't  think  Mr.  Whippleton  was  such  a  bad 
man." 

"  Your  father  did  not  think  so,  either,"  I  contin 
ued  ;  and  I  explained  to  her  in  full  the  financial 
operations  of  the  junior  partner. 

"  Do  you  expect  to  catch  him,  Philip?  " 

"  I  mean  to  do  so." 


230 

"What  can  you  do  with  him?  Ho  is  a  man, 
and  you  are  but  a  boy  —  excuse  me,  a  young 
man." 

"  I  don't  object  to  being  called  a  boy,  for  I  am 
one ;  but  I  think  I  am  a  match  for  Mr.  Whippleton, 
physically." 

"  I  think  you  are,  after  your  battle  with  Mr. 
Waterford,  who  is  larger  than  Mr.  Whippleton. 
But  what  am  I  to  do?" 

"  I  don't  know.  I  must  not  lose  sight  of  the 
Fiorina." 

"  I  don't  want  to  stay  all  night  in  this  boat," 
said  she,  timidly. 

"  If  I  run  over  to  the  city  and  land  you,  I  may 
as  well  give  up  all  thought  of  ever  seeing  Mr. 
Whippleton  again,"  I  replied,  annoyed  at  the  sit 
uation. 

"  My  mother  will  be  very  anxious  about  me." 

"  I  know  she  will ;  but  what  can  I  do  ?  " 

"  I  really  don't  know." 

"  If  Mr.  Whippleton  leads  me  any  where  near  a 
railroad  station,  I  will  see  that  you  are  put  in 
the  way  of  returning  to  your  home.  I  am  sure  if 
your  father  was  here,  he  would  insist  upon  my 
chasing  the  villain.  If  he  escapes  me,  your  father 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.       231 

will  lose  a  large  sum  of  money  —  not  less  than 
forty  thousand  dollars,  and  perhaps  more." 

"  How  terrible  !  You  must  do  as  you  think 
best,  Philip,  without  regard  to  rne.  I  don't  like 
to  stay  in  this  boat  all  night.'7 

"  It  isn't  a  bad  place  to  stay,"  I  replied,  glancing 
down  into  the  handsome  and  comfortable  cabin. 

"  Perhaps  not ;  but  I  had  rather  be  at  home. 
My  father  and  mother  will  both  worry  about  me." 

"  They  will  ascertain  before  night  where  you 
are ;  and  perhaps  Mr.  Waterford  will  return  to  the 
city  and  inform  them  that  you  are  safe." 

"  He  will  not  be  likely  to  say  anything  about 
me." 

"  Your  father  sent  me  to  follow  Mr.  Whippleton, 
and  I  am  now  literally  obeying  his  orders." 

I  saw  that  my  fair  companion  was  uneasy  in  a 
direction  she  did  not  care  to  explain ;  and  I  am 
sure  I  respected  her  all  the  more  for  the  delicacy 
of  feeling  she  exhibited.  If  she  and  her  mother 
objected  to  her  being  alone  in  the  yacht  with  Mr 
Waterford,  they  might  also  object  to  me.  I 
deemed  it  necessary  to  say  and  do  all  I  could  to 
assure  her  of  her  own  safety. 


232 

"  Can  you  steer  a  boat,  Miss  Collingsby  ?  "  I 
asked. 

"  I  have  steered  this  boat,"  she  replied. 

"  Would  you  like  to  take  the  tiller  for  a  while  ?  " 

"  I  can't  steer  unless  some  one  tells  me  which 
way  to  go." 

"  You  can  follow  the  Fiorina  —  can  you  not?" 

"  Why  do  you  ask,  Philip  ?  " 

"  I  wish  to  secure  the  anchor,  and  put  the  cook- 
room  and  cabin  in  order.  If  it  should  come  on  to 
blow,  all  our  dishes  would  be  smashed." 

"  I  will  try  to  steer." 

I  gave  her  the  helm,  and  told  her  to  keep  the 
foremast  in  range  with  the  Fiorina.  The  tiller 
was  long,  so  that  it  was  not  very  hard  to  steer, 
though  we  were  going  before  the  wind.  I  soon 
found  that  she  understood  the  business  very  well. 
I  told  her  how  to  keep  the  boat  steady,  and  in  a 
short  time  she  was  able  to  do  it  to  her  own  and  to 
my  satisfaction.  I  had  on  some  good  clothes,  and  I 
did  not  care  to  injure  them  at  the  dirty  work  of 
cleaning  and  stowing  the  anchor.  I  went  below 
and  drew  on  a  pair  of  old  overalls  I  found  in  the 
cook-room,  which  T  had  used  while  getting  dinner. 
Iii  the  cabin  I  took  a  coat  and  an  old  hat,  belong- 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      233 

ing  to  the  owner  of  the  Marian,  from  a  locker,  and 
these  completed  my  outfit.  Thus  rigged  I  went 
on  deck  again. 

"  Dear  me  !  How  you  startled  me  !  "  exclaimed 
Marian,  as  I  stepped  into  the  standing-room. 

"  Why,  what's  the  matter?" 

"  1  thought  it  was  Mr.  Waterford.  You  looked 
just  like  him  when  you  came  up  those  stairs. 
You  have  on  the  clothes  he  wore  the  last  time  I 
sailed  with  him." 

"  He  is  larger  than  I  am." 

-'  I  know  he  is  ;  but  that  hat  and  coat  made  you 
look  just  like  him  when  you  were  coming  up.  No 
matter;  I  know  you  are  not  Mr.  Waterford,  and  I 
am  thankful  you  are  not." 

11  So  am  I.  If  I  were  Mr.  Waterford,  I  would 
sell  out,  and  be  somebody  else  the  first  thing  I 
did,"  I  replied,  as  I  went  forward. 

I  washed  off  the  anchor,  and  the  end  of  the 
cable,  and  stowed  them  in  their  proper  places.  I 
cleaned  off  the  deck,  and  was  only  satisfied  when  I 
had  everything  neat  enough  to  take  dinner  upon. 
I  was  sure  the  fair  helms-lady  could  steer  better 
now  that  this  mud  and  confusion  were  removed, 
for  they  lay  in  her  line  of  vision  as  she  sighted 


234  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

the  Fiorina.  I  then  went  below,  cleared  off  the 
table,  washed  the  dishes,  and  put  them  in  the 
lockers,  swept  out  the  cabin  and  cook-room,  and 
put  everything  in  good  order.  The  interior  of  the 
yacht  was  a  model  of  comfort  and  elegance,  and  it 
was  unpleasant  to  see  anything  out  of  place 
there. 

As  it  was  probable  that  Miss  Collingsby  would 
be  compelled  to  sleep  on  board,  I  satisfied  myself 
that  everything  in  and  about  the  berths  was  in 
good  order.  I  took  a  pair  of  rifles  from  one  of 
them,  where  Mr.  Waterford  kept  them  for  his 
hunting  trips,  and  set  them  up  near  the  compan 
ion-way.  While  I  was  about  it,  I  explored  the 
cabin  in  order  to  ascertain  its  resources.  I  found 
almost  everything  there  which  could  make  the 
voyagers  on  the  lake  happy  and  comfortable. 
There  was  plenty  of  whiskey  and  wine,  as  well  as 
other  liquors,  which  could  possibly  make  the 
owner  happy ;  but  they  had  no  allurements 
to  me. 

Having  finished  my  examination,  I  went  on 
deck,  and  relieved  Marian  at  the  helm,  though 
she  declared  that  she  was  not  tired.  I  thought  it 
best  for  her  to  save  her  strength,  for  I  did  not 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       235 

know  what  she  might  be  called  upon  to  endure  be 
fore  we  returned  to  Chicago. 

"  I  have  put  the  cabin  in  order  for  you,  Miss 
Collingsby,"  said  I,  as  I  seated  myself. 

"  For  rne  ?  I  am  very  grateful  to  you,  but  I 
don't  think  I  shall  have  any  use  for  it." 

"  We  may  have  to  sail  all  night." 

"  If  we  do,  I  will  stay  here  with  you.  I  could 
not  sleep  in  such  a  place  as  that." 

"  I  think  it  is  a  very  nice  place." 

"  So  do  I ;  and  under  other  circumstances  I 
should  be  very  happy  there.  Do  you  suppose 
Julia  or  Fiorina  Lord  is  with  Mr.  Whippleton  ?  " 

"  I  am  satisfied  that  neither  of  them  is  with  him." 

"Mr.  Waterford  said  they  were;  but  that  was  a 
part  of  his  deception." 

"  He  does  not  scruple  to  lie." 

"  If  Julia  were  only  here,  I  should  be  satisfied," 
added  she,  looking  out  upon  the  lake. 

"I  am  sorry  she  is  not;  but  you  may  be  satisfied 
as  it  is.  You  shall  have  the  cabin  all  to  yourself." 

"  I'm  not  afraid  of  anything,"  said  she,  with 
some  confusion  on  her  pretty  face. 

"  You   ought  not   to    be    afraid    of  your    own 


236  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  My  own  what  ?  "   asked  she,  with  a  smile. 

"  Of  your  own  cousin." 

"  Where  is  he  ?  " 

11 1  am  he." 

"  You,  Philip/'  laughed  she. 

"  Perhaps  you  think  I  am  joking ;  but  I  am  not." 

"  You  really  don't  mean  to  say  that  you  are  my 
cousin." 

"  I  do  really  mean  to  say  it,  and  I  know  it  is 
true." 

"  How  can  that  be  ?  " 

"  It  so  happens  that  my  mother  and  your  father 
are  brother  and  sister ;  and  I  believe  the  relation 
ship  of  cousin  is  usually  established  in  some  such 
way." 

"  Doubtless  you  are  quite  right,  Mr.  Philip ; 
but  my  father  has  but  one  sister,  and  she  does 
not  happen  to  have  any  children.  Therefore  I 
cannot  possibly  have  any  such  cousin  as  you  men 
tion,"  said  she,  smiling  at  what  she  deemed  her 
overwhelming  argument ;  and  perhaps  she  thought 
I  was  getting  up  a  conspiracy  against  her. 

"  Your  conclusion  would  be  entirely  just  if  the 
premises  were  correct.  Your  father's  sister  had 
one  child." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       23? 

"  Had,  but  has  not  now.  Her  little  son  was  lost 
on  the  Missouri  River.-" 

"  Supposed  to  be  lost,  but  not  lost,"  I  replied, 
warmly.  "  I  am  that  son." 

"Do  you  really  mean  so,  Philip?"  she  inquired, 
looking  at  me  earnestly,  as  if  to  fathom  the  trick  I 
was  playing  upon  her. 

"  1  do  most  certainly." 

"  What  is  your  other  name  ?  " 

"  Farringford." 

"  That  was  certainly  the  name  of  my  aunt's  hus 
band  ;  but  it  is  impossible  to  believe  so  strange 
a  story." 

"  I  am  afraid  your  father  and  your  grandfather 
would  refuse  to  believe  what  I  say.  Now,  while 
we  are  chasing  Mr.  Whippleton,  I  will  tell  you  the 
whole  story." 

I  did  tell  it,  and  I  had  an  attentive  auditor ;  but 
when  I  had  finished  it,  I  was  taken  aback  by  her 
declaring  that  I  had  been  reading  dime  novels, 
and  had  stolen  the  plot  of  one  of  them.  But  she 
said  it  so  prettily  and  so  good-naturedly,  that  I  for 
gave  her  on  the  instant,  though  she  did  not  sue 
for  pardon. 


238 

"  But  I  have  heard  that  your  father  —  '  she 
began. 

"  Was  a  drunkard  and  a  spendthrift/''  I  added, 
completing  the  sentence  for  her.  "  He  was,  but  is 
not  now.  He  is  a  sober,  honest,  prudent,  and 
Christian  man." 

"  I  am  glad  to  hear  that,  for  I  was  forbidden 
years  ago  even  to  mention  his  name,"  added 
Marian.  "  I  don't  think  rny  father  or  grandfather 
will  believe  this  story." 

"  They  will  have  to  believe  it,  if  evidence  will 
convince  them,"  I  replied,  stoutly. 

a  But  what  does  my  aunt  say  ?  " 

"  My  mother  has  not  yet  heard  the  story.  My 
father  wrote  to  my  grandfather  several  times,  but 
he  took  no  notice  of  the  letters." 

"  Aunt  Louise  has  been  in  Europe  several 
years." 

"  I  have  never  seen  my  mother  since  I  was  a 
child ;  I  do  not  remember  her.  Do  you  know 
where  she  is  ?  " 

"  She  was  in  Italy  last  winter  ;  but  I  don't  know 
where  she  is  now." 

"  Will  you  ascertain  for  me  ? "  I  asked,  with 
more  interest  than  I  cared  to  manifest. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      239 

"I  will." 

"  I  have  her  portrait  in  St.  Louis.  It  was  in  a 
locket  attached  to  a  coral  chain  which  I  wore 
when  I  was  saved  from  the  river.  I  will  show  it 
to  you  some  time." 

"  If  it  is  really  her  portrait,  I  shall  believe  the 
story,  whether  anybody  else  does  or  not." 

"  My  father  says  it  is  her  portrait,  and  he  ought 
to  know.  He  is  sure  I  am  the  lost  son." 

"  You  are  so  honest  and  brave,  Philip,  that  I 
can't  help  believing  you.  I  hope  you  are  my 
cousin,  at  any  rate,  for  I  shall  be  proud  of  the  rela 
tionship." 

"Thank  you,  Marian  —  may  1  call  you  so  ?" 

"  Certainly  you  may,  if  you  are  my  cousin." 

"  You  are  very  kind." 

"  Indeed,  you  have  already  placed  me  under  a 
debt  of  obligation  to  you  which  I  can  never  re- 
pay." 

"  I  am  more  glad  to  serve  you  than  you  can  be 
to  be  served.  Steady  !  " 

"  What's  the  matter  ?  " 

"  The  Fiorina  has  hauled  her  wind,"  I  replied, 
watching  the  chase. 

"  What  does  that  mean  ?  " 


240  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  She  has  turned  her  head  more  to  the  north." 
I  hauled  in  the  main  sheet,  and  stood  after  the 
other  yacht.  It  was  sundown  now,  and  we  were 
within  two  or  three  miles  of  the  Michigan  shore. 
Half  an  hour  later  the  Fiorina  ran  in  at  the  mouth 
of  a  river.  When  we  reached  the  opening,  we 
found  she  had  anchored  half  a  mile  up  the  stream. 
I  did  not  deem  it  prudent  to  follow  her,  and  I 
dropped  the  Marian's  anchor  at  once. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      241 


CHAPTER    XXI. 

IN  WHICH   PHIL    ANSWERS   SOME   INQUIRIES   ABOUT   THE 
FAWN,    AND    OTHER   MATTERS. 

I  HAULED  down  the  jib,  and  left  the  mainsail 
standing  when  I  anchored  the  Marian  at  the 
mouth  of  the  river,  for  I  did  not  know  what  Mr. 
Whippleton  intended  to  do,  and  his  movements 
were  to  govern  mine.  Though  the  mouth  of  the 
river  was  rather  narrow,  it  opened,  like  the  creek 
where  we  had  anchored  at  noon,  into  a  broad 
lagoon.  There  were  hundreds  of  just  such  small 
lakes  near  the  large  one,  in  some  cases  with  a 
narrow  outlet,  and  in  others  with  none  at  all. 
Among  the  effects  of  Mr.  Ben  Waterford  which  I 
found  in  the  cabin,  were  several  large  maps,  and 
one  of  these  was  the  most  interesting  study  I 
could  find  as  I  watched  the  Fiorina. 

I  saw  from   this  map  that   there  was  no  large 
town  near  the  lagoon,  and  no  means  of  reaching  a 
16 


242  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

railroad.  I  concluded,  therefore,  that  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  did  not  intend  to  abandon  his  yacht  at  this 
point.  I  was  ready  to  make  any  movement  as 
soon  as  he  showed  his  purpose,  and  he  could  not 
take  the  Fiorina  out  of  the  lagoon  without  passing 
very  near  the  Marian.  He  had  anchored  at  a  con 
siderable  distance  from  the  shore,  but  he  had  a 
tender. 

"  What  are  you  going  to  do  here,  Philip  ? " 
asked  Marian,  after  1  had  studied  the  map  to  my 
satisfaction. 

"  I  am  going  to  see  what  Mr.  Whippleton  does. 
He  knows  that  I  am  on  his  track,  I  suppose." 

"  If  he  has  as  much  money  as  you  say,  he  will 
be  likely  to  run  away." 

"  Not  to-night ;  he  will  not  like  the  idea  of 
tramping  through  the  woods  in  the  dark." 

"  There  !  he's  hauling  in  his  small  boat,"  added 
Marian,  pointing  to  the  yacht. 

"  So  he  is,"  I  replied,  pulling  in  the  tender  of 
the  Marian. 

"  What  will  you  do  ?  " 

"  If  he  attempts  to  land,  1  shall  follow  him.  I 
don't  intend  to  lose  sight  of  him.  I  haven't  come 
so  far  to  be  balked  now." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      243 

"  What  shall  I  do  ?  "  asked  my  fair  cousin,  with 
an  anxious  look. 

"  You  will  be  perfectly  safe  here." 

"  What,  alone  ?  " 

"  I  shall  be  sorry  to  leave  you ;  but  I  must  fol 
low  Mr.  WhippletoD,  for  your  father's  sake  as  well 
as  my  own." 

"  I  will  go  with  you  then.  I  should  not  dare  to 
stay  here  alone." 

"  But  I  don't  believe  Mr.  Whippleton  intends 
to  leave  the  yacht.  If  he  had  meant  to  do  so,  he 
would  have  run  into  St.  Joseph's  River,  instead 
of  this  lagoon,  where  there  seems  to  be  no  good 
landing-place.  We  will  wait  and  see  what  he  is 
about," 

"  There  are  two  of  them,"  said  Marian. 

"  So  I  perceive.  I  was  not  aware  before  that 
he  had  any  one  with  him." 

I  observed  the  movements  of  the  two  persons 
on  board  of  the  Fiorina  for  some  time.  One  of 
them  jumped  into  the  tender,  at  last,  and  shoved 
off. 

"  He's  coming  this  way,"  said  Marian. 

u  I  see  he  is  ;  it  don't  look  like  Mr.  Whipple 
ton,"  I  replied,  closely  scrutinizing  the  person  in 


244  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

the  small  boat.  "  1  think  you  had  better  stay  in 
the  cabin,  Marian." 

"  Why  ?  " 

"  If  it  should  be  Mr.  Whippleton,  there  may  be 
some  trouble." 

"  What  trouble  ?  " 

"  The  moment  he  sees  me  he  will  understand  my 
business  with  him ;  and  to  be  entirely  candid  with 
you,  I  am  afraid  I  shall  have  a  worse  battle  with 
him  than  I  had  with  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  Why,  you  will  not  fight ! " 

"  I  must  have  your  father's  money,  and  the  prop 
erty  he  stole  from  me." 

"  I  hope  you  won't  quarrel,"  she  added,  anx 
iously. 

u  Not  if  I  can  help  it.  Mr.  Whippleton  is  a 
fugitive  fro«n  justice,  and  I  don't  mean  to  let  him 
escape  me." 

"  I  am  afraid  of  him.  If  he  gets  rid  of  you,  he 
will  go  back  and  find  Mr.  Waterford." 

"  Well,  don't  worry  any  more  yet.  That  is  not 
Mr.  Whippleton  in  the  boat.  I  am  sorry  it  is  not 
he,"  I  continued,  satisfied,  as  the  boat  approached, 
that  it  was  not  the  fugitive. 

"  Why  are  you  sorry  ?  " 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      245 

"  Because,  if  this  other  person,  whoever  he  is, 
come  on  board,  and  find  that  Mr.  Waterford  is  not 
here,  and  that  I  am  here,  he  will  try  to  escape." 

"  Of  course  he  knows  that  you  are  here." 

"  I  am  afraid  he  does ;  but  I  hope  not.  He 
had  passed  the  point  at  the  mouth  of  the  creek 
when  the  battle  was  finished  on  the  other  side  of 
the  lake.  I  can't  tell  whether  he  saw  the  result 
or  not." 

"  That's  a  black  man  in  the  boat,"  said  Marian. 

"  Then  he  has  engaged  a  cook." 

I  knew  that  Mr.  Whippleton  sometimes  employed 
a  colored  man,  who  had  been  a  sailor  and  a  cook 
on  the  lake,  to  help  him  work  the  yacht  when  1 
could  not  go  with  him ;  but  I  had  never  seen  him. 
and  did  not  think  it  probable  that  he  knew  me.  I 
went  into  the  cabin,  and  brought  out  one  of  Mr. 
Waterford's  rifles ;  but  as  I  did  not  intend  to  kil] 
anybody,  I  did  not  take  the  precaution  to  load  it. 

"  What  are  you  going  to  do  with  that,  Philip?" 
asked  Marian,  as  I  returned  to  the  standing-room, 
with  the  rifle  in  my  hand. 

"  I  may  have  occasion  to  use  it ;  but  it  is  not 
loaded." 

"Don't  shoot  any  one,  Phillip  —  pray  don't." 


246 

"  I  shall  not  be  likely  to  do  so  while  the  rifle  is 
not  loaded." 

"  But  you  may  do  something  you  don't  intend 
to  do." 

"  I  certainly  don't  intend  to  fire  a  rifle  that 
isn't  loaded ;  and  I  shall  not  shoot  any  one." 

I  had  not  yet  decided  what  to  do,  though  a 
desperate  scheme  was  flitting  through  my  mind. 
If  Mr.  Whippleton  slept  in  the  cabin  of  the  Fiorina 
that  night,  it  would  be  possible  to  board  the  yacht 
by  stealth  in  the  darkness,  fall  upon  him,  and  bind 
him  hand  and  foot.  The  plan  looked  practicable 
to  me,  and  though  I  had  not  yet  arranged  the 
details  of  it  in  my  mind,  or  considered  its  diffi 
culties,  I  was  disposed  to  undertake  it.  I  did  not 
care,  therefore,  to  have  the  negro  return  to  the 
Fiorina  with  the  intelligence  that  I  was  in  pos 
session  of  the  Marian.  I  intended,  therefore,  to 
make  him  sleep  on  board  of  our  boat. 

Before  I  had  fully  determined  in  what  manner 
I  should  detain  the  cook  on  board  of  the  Marian, 
the  boat  came  alongside.  I  turned  my  head  away 
from  the  man,  so  that  he  need  not  discover  that  I 
was  not  Mr.  Waterford  before  he  came  on  board. 
I  opened  a  conversation  with  Miss  Collingsby,  and 


THE    CATASTROPHES    OF    A   CLERK.  247 

appeared  to  take  no  notice  of  the  arrival.  The 
negro  was  evidently  one  of  the  lazy  kind,  for  he 
did  not  offer  to  come  on  board. 

"  How  do  you  do,  Mr.  Waterford  ? "  said  the 
cook,  as  he  brought  his  boat  under  the  quarter  of 
the  yacht. 

"  How  do  you  do  ?  "  I  replied,  in  a  gruff  tone. 

"  Gorrificious !  Don't  you  know  old  Peter?" 
exclaimed  the  cook,  apparently  wounded  at  my 
want  of  recognition  of  him. 

"How  are  you,  old  Peter?"  I  added,  coughing 
violently  to  disguise  my  voice. 

"  Gorrificious,  Mr.  Waterford  !  I  reckon  you've 
got  a  bad  cold.  I've  got  a  letter  for  you  from 
Mr.  Whippleton,"  continued  the  cook. 

"Take  it  — will  you,  Marian?"  I  added,  still 
coughing.  "  I  don't  want  him  to  see  me  ;  "  and  I 
retreated  into  the  cabin. 

"  Thank  you  miss,"  said  Peter,  as  he  delivered 
the  letter.  "  I'm  right  down  sorry  Mr.  Waterford 
has  got  such  a  terrible  cough  —  on  his  wedding 
day,  too,  miss.  Gorrificious,  Miss  Collingsby  !  Mr. 
Waterford  is  a  lucky  gentleman ;  but  he  desarves 
you.  He's  a  fine  gentleman  —  liberal  to  old  Peter 
and  all  the  boys." 


248  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OB 

Marian  made  no  reply  to  this  speech,  though, 
when  she  appeared  in  the  cabin,  her  cheeks  and 
forehead  were  crimson  with  confusion. 

"  Did  you  hear  what  old  Peter  said/'  she  asked. 

"  I  did ;  and  it  is  plain  enough  that  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  is  in  the  secret,  and  has  even  told  it  to  his 
cook." 

"  If  I  ever  get  home  again,  1  shall  not  disobey 
my  father.  To  think  that  the  wretch  told  Mr. 
Whippleton  all  about  it  beforehand." 

"  I  supposed  he  had/'  I  replied,  as  I  opened  the 
letter. 

"  What  does  he  say,  Philip  ? "  asked  Marian, 
curiously. 

"  '  Dear  Ben'  — that's  the  way  he  begins.  '  How 
is  the  fawn?'" 

"The  fawn?" 

"  Probably  meaning  Miss  Collingsby,"  I  replied. 
"  l  i  was  afraid  Phil  would  give  you  some  trouble 
when  I  saw  you  had  him  on  board.  But  you 
fixed  him  handsomely.  I  saw  him  tip  over  the 
bow  of  the  boat.  If  you  hadn't  got  rid  of  him, 
I  should  have  gone  ashore  and  helped  you.  I'm 
glad  it's  all  right.  Why  didn't  you  run  up  the 
river  farther,  and  anchor  near  the  Fiorina  ?  I 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       249 

thought  I  wouldn't  call  upon  you  till  I  knew  how 
the  fawn  was.  If  she  is  agreeable,  we  will  run  to 
St.  Joseph  in  the  morning,  and  have  your  business 
done  before  noon.7 ; 

"  The  brute  !  "  exclaimed  Marian,  indignantly. 
"  This  has  cured  me  of  all  the  romance  I  ever  had. 
I  used  to  think  my  father  was  very  harsh ;  but 
now  I  know  he  was  right.  He  knew  this  man 
better  than  I  did." 

The  familiarity  and  coarseness  of  the  epistle 
were  very  offensive  to  her,  and  she  could  hardly 
restrain  her  indignation. 

" l  P.  S./  I  continued,  reading  from  the  letter. 
1  In  my  hurry  I  forgot  the  most  important  part 
of  my  stores.  Please  send  me  a  couple  of  bottles 
of  whiskey,  and  let  me  know  all  about  the  fawn.; '; 

That  was  all ;  and  Mr.  Whippleton  wanted  but 
two  things  —  whiskey  and  information  in  regard 
to  the  fawn.  I  intended  to  furnish  him  with  both, 
as  the  representative  of  Mr.  Ben  Waterford.  I 
found  a  sheet  of  paper  in  the  cabin,  and  I  pro 
ceeded  to  describe  the  condition  of  the  "  fawn." 

"  Dear  Charley."  I  began ;  and  I  had  heard  Mr. 
Waterford  apply  this  familiar  name  to  our  junior 
partner :  "  The  fawn  is  very  uneasy,  and  does  not 


250  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

like  the  idea  of  staying  over  night  in  this  lagoon. 
I  don't  think  it  is  safe  for  you  to  remain  here.  Phil 
said  the  officers  were  on  your  track,  that  Col- 
lingsby  was  after  you  with  a  sharp  stick.  Phil 
must  have  spoken  to  the  fawn,  for  she  is  very  sus 
picious.  I  shall  have  to  leave  in  order  to  quiet 
her.  I  am  all  alone,  and  can't  cook,  or  do  any 
thing,  while  sailing.  I  am  in  a  fix.  I  want  Peter 
badly.  Can't  you  let  me  have  him  ?  I  need  him 
more  than  you  do.  Why  can't  you  leave  the  Fio 
rina  here,  and  come  on  board  of  the  Marian  ?  I 
send  you  four  bottles  of  whiskey. 

"  P.  S.  1  got  a  rap  on  the  right  hand  in  the 
fight,  and  can't  write  much." 

I  wrote  this  with  a  pencil,  and  in  a  style  which 
would  pass  for  anybody's  handwriting  who  had 
been  wounded  in  a  fight.  I  folded  it  up,  and 
having  placed  the  four  bottles  of  whiskey  in  a 
basket,  I  asked  Marian  to  deliver  them  to  the 
cook,  while  I  continued  to  cough  vigorously.  I 
stood  at  the  companion-way  while  my  fair  com 
panion  did  the  errand. 

"  Gorrificious,  Miss  Collingsby  !  "  exclaimed  the 
negro.  "  Whiskey's  plenty  as  water,  but  none  of 
it  for  old  Peter." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       251 

"Take  this  letter  to  Mr.  Whippleton,"  added 
Marian. 

"  Yes,  miss.  Old  Peterll  do  that.  Can  you  told 
me  if  the  letter  says  how  many  bottles  of  whiskey 
they  is  in  the  basket?" 

"  It  says  four." 

"  Marian,"  I  called  to  her.  "  Here  is  one  for 
Peter." 

I  gave  her  the  extra  bottle,  and  she  presented 
it  to  the  CLok,  who  was  more  grateful  for  the  gift 
than  he  would  have  been  for  its  value  in  cash.  I 
am  willing  to  acknowledge  that  it  was  against  my 
principles  to  give  liquor  to  any  one  ;  but  the  prob 
ability  was,  that  I  should  have  a  battle  with  the 
master,  who  would  perhaps  be  aided  by  the  man ; 
and  I  regarded  the  whiskey  as  an  ally  of  mine,  as 
long  as  they,  and  not  I,  drank  it.  As  soon  as 
Peter  had  departed,  my  cough  improved,  and  I 
ventured  on  deck  again.  I  was  sure  that  what  I 
had  written  would  make  a  breeze,  when  Mr.  Whip 
pleton  read  it,  and  I  tried  to  prepare  myself  for 
whatever  might  happen. 


252 


CHAPTER    XXII. 

IN    WHICH     PHIL    IS    BEWILDERED,   AND     THE    MARIAN 
SAILS   FOR   CHICAGO. 


next,  Philip  ?  "  asked  Marian,  when 
had  seated  myself  in  the  standing- 
room. 

"  That  boat  will  return  next  with  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton,"  I  replied,  picking  up  the  rifle  which  I  had 
left  upon  the  cushion. 

"  I  hope  there  will  be  no  violence,"  she  added, 
anxiously. 

"  I  hope  not ;  but  what  shall  I  do  ?  Shall  I  let 
him  rob  your  father  of  half  the  capital  of  the  firm  ? 
Shall  I  let  him  rob  his  mother  of  nearly  all  she  has 
in  the  world?  If  I  don't  strike  when  I  have  an 
opportunity,  everything  will  be  lost." 

"  What  do  you  mean  by   his  mother  ? " 

"  The  package  which  Mr.  Whippleton  took  from 
the  safe  was  placed  in  my  charge  by  his  mother, 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      253 

to  keep  it  from  falling  into  his  hands.  She  was 
very  sick,  and  may  riot  live  many  days.  Your 
father  had  no  idea  what  a  villain  his  partner  was." 

"  I  am  sure  he  had  not ;  but  can't  you  manage 
it  without  any  violence  ?  " 

"  If  I  can,  I  will.  I  have  no  taste  for  a  fight ; 
but  I  have  still  less  for  letting  Mr.  Whippleton 
run  away  with  his  ill-gotten  gains.  I  should  be 
ashamed  of  myself  if  I  did.  Besides,  your  father 
accuses  me  of  concealing  the  villany  of  his  part 
ner,  and  even  of  being  a  participator  in  it.  He 
would  have  good  reason  to  think  so  if  I  let  him 
slip  through  my  fingers  now.  No,  I  will  not  do  it. 
I  will  follow  him  to  the  end  of  the  earth,  arid  if  he 
don't  give  up  his  plunder  there  will  be  a  fight, 
though  I  may  get  my  own  head  smashed  in  the 
scrape." 

Marian  said  no  more  about  peace  on  such  terms, 
and  I  watched  the  boat  with  interest,  as  it  came  up 
under  the  counter  of  the  Fiorina.  I  did  not  see  Mr. 
Whippleton  read  the  letter  I  had  written ;  but  I 
have  no  doubt  that  he  did  read  it,  for  in  a  few  mo 
ments  more  he  embarked  in  the  tender  with  Peter. 

"  There  they  corne,  just  as  you  said  !  "  exclaimed 
Marian,  apparently  in  despair. 


254  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  I  knew  that  letter  would  bring  him,  for  I  in 
formed  him  that  the  officers  of  justice  were  on  his 
track.  I  have  no  doubt  that  the  police  have  tele 
graphed  to  all  the  cities  within  a  thousand  miles 
of  Chicago  by  this  time.  If  anything  would  wake 
up  the  rascal,  the  news  I  sent  him  would  have  that 
effect.  Besides,  I  invited  him  to  take  passage  in 
the  Marian." 

"  You  did  !  " 

"  Yes,  for  I  want  him  where  I  can  put  my  hand 
upon  him." 

"  But  he  can  put  his  hand  upon  you,  and  then  I 
shall  be  alone.  What  will  become  of  me  ?  " 

"  You  need  not  be  at  all  alarmed.  He  will  not 
injure  or  insult  you." 

"What  do  you  mean  to  do,  Philip?  Can't  I 
help  you?" 

"  I  intend  to  make  a  prisoner  of  him,  if  possible. 
I  don't  think  you  can  help  me  do  such  a  job.  I 
am  going  into  the  cabin  now,  for  I  don't  wish  him 
to  see  me  until  he  is  fairly  on  board." 

"What  shall  I  do?" 

"  Stay  here,  if  you  please.  He  will  go  below 
immediately." 

The  tender  was  rapidly  approaching  the  yacht, 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      255 

and  I  went  into  the  cabin,  where  I  had  another 
attack  of  coughing  as  soon  as  I  heard  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  step  upon  the  deck. 

"  Good  evening,  Miss  Collingsby,"  said  he,  as  he 
saw  our  fair  passenger.  "  I  hope  you  are  very 
well.  Where  is  your  friend  ?  " 

"  What  friend  ?  "  she  asked,  in  such  a  tone  that 
I  was  afraid  she  would  excite  his  suspicions  before 
he  came  into  the  cabin. 

"  Why,  Mr.  Waterford,  of  course.  Since  you 
are  to  become  his  wife  to-morrow  morning,  he 
ought  to  be  the  dearest  friend  on  earth  to  you. 
But  as  he  is  not  on  deck,  he  must  be  in  the 
cabin." 

I  heard  his  step  on  the  ladder,  and  I  confess 
that  I  felt  no  little  anxiety  for  the  issue.  I  sat 
upon  one  of  the  lockers,  still  wearing  the  skipper's 
coat  and  hat.  It  was  rather  dark  in  the  cabin,  and 
I  was  not  surprised  that  he  did  not  recognize  me 
at  first. 

"  What's  all  this,  Ben  ? "  said  he,  in  hurried 
speech.  "  Every  dollar  counts  now,  and  I  can't 
afford  to  lose  a  thousand  by  leaving  my  boat  here. 
I  was  to  deliver  her  to  the  purchaser  to-morrow  at 
St.  Joseph.  What  do  you  mean  about  officers? 


256  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

Collingsby  hasn't  the  remotest  suspicion  that  any 
thing  is  wrong." 

"  Yes,  he  has/'  I  replied,  coughing  and  choking, 
so  that  I  could  not  have  identified  my  own  voice. 

"  What  has  happened  ? ';  he  demanded,  in  obvi 
ous  alarm. 

"  He  knows  everything,"  I  barked,  with  my 
handkerchief  over  my  mouth.  "  He  has  tele 
graphed  to  St.  Joseph  and  fifty  other  places 
before  this  time  to  have  you  arrested." 

"  Arrested ! " 

I  heard  the  long  breath  he  drew  in  his  terror. 

"  We  must  be  off  at  once." 

"  What's  the  matter  with  you  ?  What  makes 
you  cough  so  ?  " 

"A  cold." 

"What  will  you  do  with  the  fawn,  Ben?" 

"  She  is  not  agreed  to  anything,"  I  replied,  as  I 
struck  a  match,  for  I  thought  it  was  time  to  have 
a  little  more  light  on  the  subject. 

I  had  waited  till  he  was  in  a  comfortable  posi 
tion  on  the  locker  opposite  me,  with  the  table 
between  us.  I  lighted  the  lamp,  which  was  sus 
pended  from  the  ceiling  of  the  cabin.  My  cough 
was  suddenly  and  miraculously  cured. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      257 

"What  are  you  going  to  do,  Ben?" 

"That  will  depend  upon  what  you  do,"  1  re 
plied,  in  my  natural  voice. 

11  Who  are  you  ?  " 

"  Your  obedient  servant/'  I  answered,  throwing 
off  the  hat  I  had  worn,  which  concealed  my  face 
in  part. 

"  Phil ! "  gasped  he,  starting  back  with  astonish 
ment. 

"  Assistant  book-keeper,   &c.,"  I  replied. 

"  What  are  you  doing  here  ?  " 

"  Attending  to  the  affairs  of  the  firm  which  I 
have  the  honor  to  serve.  I  am  here  on  their  busi 
ness,  though  I  have  a  little  of  mine  to  attend  to  at 
the  same  time.'7 

"  Where  is  Mr.  Waterford  ?  "  demanded  he  ;  and 
I  saw  by  the  light  of  the  lamp  that  he  was  as  pale 
as  when  I  had  startled  him  with  my  balance  sheet 
in  the  counting-room. 

"  I  left  him  over  at  the  mouth  of  that  creek  on 
the  other  side  of  the  lake." 

"  You  left  him  there  ?  Do  you  mean  to  say  that 
you  have  stolen  his  yacht?" 

"  No,  sir ;  I  don't  mean  to  say  so,  and  I  don't 
17 


258 

think  it  is  quite  fair  for  you  to  say  so,  since  1 
intend  to  restore  her  to  Mr.  Waterford,  or  to  his 
legal  representative,  on  claim,  and  sufficient  evi 
dence  of  ownership." 

"  Who  wrote  the  letter  which  Peter  brought 
me?" 

"  I  did ;  but,  as  I  told  you  in  the  letter,  my  hand 
was  injured  in  the  fight,  and  I  couldn't  do  justice 
to  my  own  style  of  penmanship." 

"  It  was  a  forgery  then." 

"  I  signed  no  name  to  it,  but  left  you  to  draw 
your  own  inferences." 

"  It  is  just  as  much  a  forgery  as  though  you  had 
signed  it." 

"  But  not  half  so  much  a  forgery  as  receipting 
a  lumber  bill  of  the  Michigan  Pine  Company.  I 
hope  the  whiskey  reached  you  in  good  order  and 
condition." 

"  None  of  your  impudence,  Phil.  This  isn't  th& 
way  to  treat  one  who  has  used  you  as  well  as  I 
have." 

"  For  all  the  kindness  you  have  bestowed  upon 
me,  I  am  very  grateful ;  and  I  am  only  sorry  you 
were  not  worthy  of  the  confidence  I  felt  in  your 
integrity." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      259 

"We  need  not  quarrel,  Phil,"  said  he,  after  a 
short  pause.  "  We  have  always  been  good 
friends ;  let  us  be  so  still.  I  saw  a  scuffle  be 
tween  you  and  Mr.  Waterford  over  at  the  creek." 

"  And  you  thought  I  had  the  worst  of  it." 

"  I  saw  him  pitch  you  out  of  the  boat." 

"  If  you  had  staid  a  moment  longer  in  sight,  you 
would  have  seen  me  pitch  him  out  afterwards." 

I  defined  and  explained  my  position,  and  justi 
fied  it  as  well  as  I  was  able.  Miss  Collingsby  had 
appealed  to  me  for  help,  and  in  rendering  it,  under 
the  circumstances,  I  did  not  feel  disposed  to  let 
the  ownership  of  the  yacht  defeat  my  good  inten 
tions  to  save  her  from  the  wiles  of  a  villain. 

"  Do  you  call  Ben  Waterford  a  villain  ?  "  he  de 
manded. 

"  The  dictionary  does  not  afford  me  any  better 
word  to  express  my  opinion  of  him.  I  wish  he 
was  the  only  one  I  knew." 

"Do  you  refer  to  me?" 

I  explained  myself  more  fully  on  this  point,  and 
the  junior  partner  of  our  house  mildly  expressed 
his  rage.  I  suppose  his  stinging  conscience  did 
not  permit  him  to  do  so  in  a  more  determined 
manner.  I  told  him  that  Mr.  Collingsby  was  in 


260  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OB 

possession  of  all  the  facts  relating  to  his  defalca 
tions,  both  of  the  money  and  the  notes  of  the  firm. 
He  bit  his  lip  in  silence  for  a  few  moments,  as 
if  arranging  his  mental  forces  for  an  assault 
upon  me. 

"  Phil,  you  have  made  another  stupid  blunder/' 
said  he.  "  As  I  have  told  you  plainly  before,  you 
are  insufferably  conceited.  You  think  you  know 
enough  for  two  men,  when  you  know  just  half 
enough  for  one.  That's  what's  the  matter.  You 
have  made  a  pretty  kettle  of  fish." 

"  I  think  you  made  it  yourself." 

"  Don't  be  impudent.  We  must  return  to  Chi 
cago  at  once." 

"  That's  one  of  my  sentiments  exactly,"  I  re 
plied.  "  Shall  we  weigh  anchor  now  ?" 

u  Yes,  if  you  like,  though  there  is  no  wind.  I 
told  you  Mr.  Collingsby  didn't  know  anything 
about  the  business,  and  would  be  alarmed  at  your 
ridiculous  statements." 

"  He  knows  all  about  the  business  now,  and,  as 
you  say,  he  is  a  great  deal  alarmed." 

"  I  assure  you,  Phil,  upon  my  honor,  that  every 
thing  about  the  business  is  all  right.  You  have 
made  another  blunder." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      261 

"  I  wish  I  had." 

"  You  have." 

"  You  drew  the  balance  at  the  bank,  and  dis 
counted  over  thirty  thousand  dollars'  worth  of 
notes." 

"  I  did ;  and  as  a  member  of  the  firm,  I  had  a 
perfect  right  to  do  so.  I  had  a  chance  to  make 
fifty  thousand  on  one  lot  of  lumber.  I  was  not  to 
be  prevented  from  doing  so  by  a  whim  of  my  part 
ner.  He  prefers  generally  to  furnish  money, 
rather  than  put  our  business  paper  on  the  market. 
I  gave  him  the  opportunity  to  do  so.  He  refused, 
and  I  raised  the  money  as  I  could.  This  is  simply 
a  question  between  Mr.  Collingsby  and  me.  When 
he  wishes  to  dissolve,  I'm  ready." 

"  May  I  ask  what  you  are  doing  over  here,  with 
such  a  heavy  transaction  on  your  hands  ?  " 

"  On  my  way  to  buy  the  lumber.  I  have  the 
money  in  my  bag,"  said  he,  holding  up  the  article. 

"  Do  you  happen  to  have  a  package  in  your  bag 
with  my  name  upon  it,  taken  from  the  safe  ?  " 

"  I  have  ;  and  I  happen  to  have  also  an  order 
from  my  mother  for  you  to  deliver  it  to  me." 

"  Indeed." 


262 

"  Here  it  is,"  he  added,  handing  me  a  crumpled 
paper. 

It  certainly  was  an  order,  setting  forth  that  all 
differences  between  Mrs.  Whippleton  and  her  son 
had  been  settled,  and  requiring  me  to  give  him 
the  papers. 

"  When  I  was  ready  to  go,  I  could  not  find  you ; 
so  I  took  the  papers ;  but  you  have  the  order  now, 
and  I  hope  you  are  satisfied  on  that  point." 

I  was  not  exactly  satisfied ;  but  I  felt  that  Mr. 
Whippleton  was  arguing  me  down,  if  he  was  not 
convincing  me. 

"  How  about  those  invoices  ?  "  I  continued. 
"  The  agent  of  the  Michigan  Pine  Company  says 
he  sold  you  no  such  lumber." 

"  If  he  will  tell  me  so  to  my  face,  I  should  like 
to  have  him  do  it.  I  will  give  him  an  opportunity 
to-morrow." 

Mr.  Whippleton  was  indignant.  He  talked  hon 
est,  and  I  could  not  gainsay  him.  I  was  almost 
inclined  to  believe  that  I  was  a  fool,  and  had  made 
a  blunder ;  but  as  he  was  willing  to  go  to  Chicago, 
I  was  satisfied  to  leave  the  adjustment  of  the 
whole  matter  to  Mr.  Collingsby.  We  went  on 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      263 

deck,  and  as  there  was  a  little  breeze,  we  tripped 
the  anchor,  and  stood  up  the  lagoon.  I  was  be 
wildered  ;  but  my  heaviest  catastrophe  wao  yet  to 
come. 


DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 


CHAPTER    XXIII. 

IN  WHICH  PHIL,  IN   THE   MARIAN,  GETS   THE   WEATHER- 
GAGE   OF   THE   FLORINA. 

THERE  was  scarcely  a  breath  of  wind  when 
we  weighed  anchor.  Mr.  Whippleton  in 
sisted  upon  running  up  to  the  Fiorina,  in  order  to 
leave  his  tender,  and  to  obtain  certain  articles  he 
had  left  on  board.  The  breeze  entirely  failed  be 
fore  we  had  made  half  the  distance,  and  we  were 
obliged  to  anchor  again  to  prevent  being  drifted 
ashore.  Mr.  Whippleton  and  old  Peter  took  both 
the  tenders,  and  visited  the  Fiorina,  leaving  Mar 
ian  and  myself  alone  again. 

"I  am  so  thankful  that  you  had  no  quarrel," 
said  she,  as  we  sat  together  in  the  standing-room, 
watching  the  receding  boats. 

"So  am  I,  Marian." 

"  And  it  seems  that  you  were  mistaken  in  regard 
to  his  accounts." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      265 

"  I  don't  think  I  was,"  I  replied,  rather  warmly. 
"  I  am  perplexed  and  bothered ;  but  I  don't  see 
how  I  can  be  mistaken." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  would  not  be  willing  to  return 
to  Chicago,  if  he  had  been  such  a  villain  as  you 
say." 

"  I  don't  think  he  would.  That  is  really  all  the 
evidence  I  have  that  he  has  not  been  stealing  his 
partner's  money.  I  don't  understand  it ;  but  if  he 
will  return  to  Chicago,  that  is  all  I  desire.  I  pre 
fer  that  he  should  settle  the  matter  with  your 
father." 

"  But  he  knew  all  about  Mr.  Waterford's  plans," 
added  she,  turning  away  from  me,  though  the 
gloom  of  the  evening  hid  her  blushes. 

"  Yes  ;  he  said  he  did.  He  told  me  that,  if  Mr. 
Waterford  loved  you,  and  you  loved  Mr.  Water- 
ford,  he  could  see  no  reason  why  you  should  not 
be  happy  together,  in  spite  of  the  prejudices  of 
your  father." 

"  I  never  consented  to  elope  with  Mr.  Water- 
ford.  It  is  true  that  I  listened  to  his  proposal, 
several  weeks  ago ;  but  I  did  not  agree  to  it.  He 
did  not  renew  it  when  I  asked  for  time  to  think  of 
it.  I  don't  love  him  now ;  I  can't  say  that  I  ever 


266  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

did,  though  I  was  rather  pleased  with  him.  After 
this,  I'm  sure  I  shall  always  think  more  of  a  gen 
tleman's  character  than  of  his  looks  and  manners." 

"  I  think  the  character  is  of  vastly  more  im 
portance,"  I  replied,  judging  from  observation 
rather  than  experience. 

"  Do  you  think  Mr.  Whippleton  will  come  back, 
Philip?" 

"  Come  back?  Yes,"  I  replied,  rather  startled 
by  the  question. 

"  He  may  take  one  of  those  boats,  go  on  shore, 
and  make  his  way  across  the  state  to  the  east." 

"  Then  you  think  it  is  possible  that  I  was  not 
mistaken  in  regard  to  the  accounts  of  Mr.  Whip 
pleton?" 

"  Of  course  it  is  possible.  It  just  occurred  to 
me  that  he  might  have  taken  this  method  of  get 
ting  rid  of  you." 

"  You  are  right,  Marian.  I  ought  to  have  gone 
with  them,  for  they  have  taken  both  boats,  and 
there  isn't  a  breath  of  wind." 

'  I  don't  mean  that  it  is  so,  only  that  it  might 
be." 

"  Now  I  think  of  it,  he  said  in  his  letter  that  he 
had  sold  the  Fiorina,  and  was  to  deliver  her  in  St. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      267 

Joseph  to-morrow.  If  he  had  not  intended  to 
have  cleared  out,  he  would  not  have  sold  her.  1 
am  afraid  I  have  made  another  blunder/' 

I  was  vexed  at  my  own  want  of  precaution. 
Mr.  Whippleton  had  taken  both  tenders,  and  it 
seemed  to  me  now  that  he  had  done  so  in  order  to 
prevent  me  from  following  him.  He  intended  to 
leave  his  own  with  his  yacht,  and  to  return  in  that 
belonging  to  the  Marian.  I  do  not  even  now  know 
that  Miss  Collingsby  had  not  suggested  his  real 
purpose,  for  while  I  was  vexing  myself  about  the 
blunder  I  had  made,  the  waters  were  rippled  by  a 
gentle  breeze.  I  sprang  forward  and  hauled  up 
the  anchor  with  a  celerity  that  was  worthy  of  the 
occasion.  The  mainsail  was  still  up,  and  taking 
the  helm,  I  ran  the  yacht  up  the  lagoon.  I  could 
just  see  the  outline  of  the  Fiorina  in  the  gloom, 
and  a  few  puffs  of  wind  carried  us  up  to  her. 

There  was  a  light  in  the  cabin  of  the  Fiorina, 
and  both  the  tenders  were  alongside.  Mr.  Whip 
pleton  had  not  gone  yet,  whatever  he  intended  to 
do,  and  I  breathed  freely  again. 

"  Gorrificious  ! "  shouted  Peter  from  the  deck  of 
the  Fiorina.  "  Where  you  goin'  now  ?  " 

"  Stand  by  to  catch  a  line,"  I  replied. 


268  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  All  ready  ;  heave  the  line/'  added  the  cook. 

In  a  moment  we  were  fast  to  the  other  yacht, 
and  I  firmly  determined  not  to  lose  sight  of  Mr. 
Whippleton  again,  under  any  circumstances.  We 
had  hardly  made  fast  before  the  wind  died  out 
again.  It  was  only  a  puff  which  had  come  to  my 
aid,  as  it  were  providentially,  and  had  enabled  me 
to  gain  my  point.  I  had  noticed,  when  Mr.  Whip 
pleton  left  the  Fiorina,  that  he  took  with  him  the 
leather  bag,  which  contained  his  money  and  val 
uable  papers;  but  I  had  thought  nothing  of  the 
circumstance  at  the  time,  for  it  seemed  to  me 
quite  natural  that  he  should  be  very  careful  of  an 
article  of  so  much  value.  If  that  providential 
puff  of  air  had  not  enabled  me  to  throw  the  Mar- 
ian  alongside  his  yacht,  I  am  satisfied,  in  the  light 
of  subsequent  events,  that  he  would  have  made 
an  attempt  to  elude  me.  He  could  have  gone  on 
shore  in  the  tender,  lived  in  the  woods,  or  at  the 
cabin  of  some  settler,  for  a  week  or  more,  until  I 
was  tired  of  waiting  for  him,  and  then  taken  to  his 
yacht,  and  escaped  by  the  way  of  Canada. 

"  What  are  you  doing  up  here,  Phil  ?  "  shouted 
the  subject  of  all  my  anxious  solicitude,  as  he 
came  out  of  the  cabin  of  the  Fiorina. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       269 

"  We  had  a  little  breeze,  and  I  came  up  to  save 
you  the  trouble  of  rowing/'  I  replied. 

"  You  have  a  talent  for  making  blunders,  Phil," 
growled  he,  in  a  tone  which  did  much  to  confirm 
my  suspicions. 

"  Not  a  bad  blunder,  since  I  am  safe  here,"  I 
replied. 

"  You  might  have  run  her  aground,  and  we 
should  have  had  to  leave  her  here  all  summer. 
Don't  you  know  any  better  than  to  run  about  in 
the  night  where  you  are  not  acquainted?  Is  that 
the  way  you  use  other  people's  boats  ?  " 

"  The  Marian  is  still  afloat,  and  safe.  Do  you 
want  any  help  ?  " 

"  No ;  no  such  help  as  you  can  give.  You  can't 
do  anything  without  making  a  blunder.  I  should 
like  to  knock  the  conceit  out  of  you." 

The  more  blunders  he  charged  upon  me;  and 
the  more  savage  he  was,  the  better  assured  I  be 
came  that  I  had  hit  the  nail  on  the  head.  As  we 
were  playing  at  cross-purposes,  it  was  evident  that 
all  my  direct  thrusts  would  be  regarded  as  blun 
ders  by  him.  What  suited  him  could  not  possibly 
suit  me,  under  the  present  circumstances.  I  did 
not  know  what  he  was  doing  on  board  of  the  Flo- 


270  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

rina,  and  I  did  not  care,  so  long  as  I  knew  where 
he  was.  He  went  into  the  cabin  after  he  had 
expressed  his  mind  to  me,  and  I  did  not  see  him 
again  for  over  an  hour. 

"  You  must  be  tired,  Marian,"  I  said  to  my  fair 
companion,  as  I  heard  her  gape. 

"  I  am  tired,  Philip." 

"  Why  not  lie  down,  then  ?  I  will  watch  over 
you,  and  see  that  no  harm  comes  to  you  while  you 
sleep." 

"  Thank  you,  Philip  ;  you  are  very  kind.  I  am 
afraid  I  could  not  sleep  if  I  did  lie  down." 

"  You  can  at  least  rest  yourself.  You  shall 
have  the  cabin  all  to  yourself.  We  may  not  leave 
this  lagoon  before  morning." 

"  Where  will  the  rest  of  you  sleep,  if  I  take  the 
cabin  all  to  myself?  " 

"  I  shall  sleep  on  deck.  These  cushions  are  as 
good  a  bed  as  I  want." 

"And  Mr.  Whippleton?" 

"  If  we  stay  here,  he  will  sleep  on  board  of  his 
own  yacht.  If  not,  he  will  probably  stay  at  the 
helm." 

"  I  am  very  tired,  for  it  seems  to  me  that  1 
never  endured  so  much  in  one  day  in  my  life 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      271 

Before,"  she  replied,  rising,  and  going  into  the 
cabin. 

I  went  with  her,  and  secured  the  door  which 
led  into  the  cook-room,  and  showed  her  how  to 
fasten  the  slide  at  the  companion-way.  I  drew 
the  blue  curtains  over  the  deck  lights,  and  it 
seemed  to  me  that  maiden  never  had  a  more  in 
viting  chamber  than  the  little  cabin  of  the  Marian. 
I  bade  her  good  night,  and  helped  her  close  the 
door.  Resuming  my  seat  on  the  cushions  of  the 
standing-room,  I  thanked  God  that  he  had  pre 
served  her  from  the  wiles  of  the  villain ;  and  1 
hoped  she  did  not  herself  forget  to  acknowledge 
the  goodness  of  Him  who  always  watches  over  the 
innocent. 

There  was  no  wind,  and  no  sign  of  any.  The 
sky  was  cloudless,  and  there  was  not  a  ripple  on 
the  lagoon,  not  a  rustle  in  the  forest  that  bordered 
it.  I  had  brought  up  a  blanket  and  an  old  coat 
from  the  cabin  to  serve  me  as  bed-clothes ;  and 
stretching  myself  on  the  cushions,  I  soon  went  to 
sleep.  I  did  not  believe  that  Mr.  Whippleton 
could  leave  in  the  boat  without  my  knowledge,  for 
at  such  times  I  always  slept  with  one  eye  open. 
If  a  breeze  came,  it  would  shake  the  mainsail  and 


272  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

rattle  the  sheet-blocks  near  my  head,  and  wake 
me.  I  had  been  up  half  of  the  preceding  night 
with  Mrs.  Whippleton,  and  I  was  very  tired  my 
self.  I  could  not  foresee  what  would  happen 
within  the  next  few  days,  and  I  deemed  it  prudent 
to  economize  my  strength. 

So  far  as  the  wind  was  concerned,  my  calcula 
tion  was  correct.  It  did  shake  the  mainsail,  and 
rattle  the  sheet-blocks,  and  I  was  aroused  from 
my  slumbers.  I  raised  myself  upon  my  bed,  to 
assure  myself  that  the  Fiorina  was  still  near  me. 
That  was  the  very  thing,  however,  of  which  1 
could  not  assure  myself.  In  fact  she  was  not  near 
me.  I  sprang  to  my  feet,  and  felt  that  I  had  made 
a  blunder,  but  such  a  one  as  Mr.  Whippleton 
would  not  charge  upon  me.  The  Marian  was 
adrift,  and  the  breeze  was  carrying  her  farther  up 
the  lagoon,  where  she  might  get  aground.  My 
first  care  was  to  secure  her  from  any  such  acci 
dent,  which  would  indeed  have  been  a  catastrophe 
to  me.  All  I  had  to  do  was  to  put  the  helm  down, 
and  bring  the  yacht  up  into  the  wind,  which  came 
only  in  light  puffs.  It  was  from  the  westward, 
and  I  had  just  slant  enough  to  enable  me  to  lay  a 
course  towards  the  lake. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      273 

As  soon  as  I  got  her  head  to  the  breeze,  I 
hoisted  the  jib.  Seating  myself  at  the  helm,  1 
studied  the  course,  and  kept  a  sharp  lookout  ahead 
for  the  Fiorina.  I  was  satisfied  that  the  first 
breath  of  wind  had  waked  me,  and  that  the  other 
yaeht  could  not  be  far  from  me.  In  a  few  mo 
ments  I  was  assured  of  the  correctness  of  my  cal 
culation,  for  I  discovered  the  Fiorina  behind  a 
point  of  land.  She  had  come  thus  far  without 
hoisting  her  jib,  and  had  not  been  able  to  lay  very 
close  to  the  wind.  Mr.  Whippleton  knew  the  nav 
igation  of  the  lagoon,  and  had  run  his  yacht  where 
I  should  not  have  dared  to  go.  Probably  he  had 
not  hoisted  his  jib  before,  lest  the  noise  of  it 
should  wake  mo ;  but  I  saw  it  go  up  almost  as 
soon  as  I  caught  sight  of  her. 

I  do  not  like  to  accuse  other  people  of  making 
blunders,  but  I  was  sure  that  Mr.  Whippleton  had 
made  one  in  not  standing  directly  out  of  the 
lagoon;  but  doubtless  he  expected  to  have  his 
own  time  for  the  operation.  As  it  was,  1  had  the 
weather-gage  of  him.  He  had  run  over  to  lee 
ward  so  far,  with  a  projecting  point  of  land  be 
tween  him  and  the  mouth  of  the  creek,  that  I 
18 


274  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OK 

should  be  off  the  headland  before  he  could 
reach  it. 

I  rubbed  my  hands  with  delight  when  I  realized 
the  situation,  and  saw  that  I  could  not  help  cut 
ting  him  out.  The  neglect  on  his  part  to  hoist 
the  jib  had  lost  him  the  battle,  while  my  jib  had 
won  it  for  me.  The  slant  of  the  wind  would  ena 
ble  me  to  go  clear  of  the  point,  off  which  I  had 
first  anchored  the  Marian,  while  Mr.  Whippleton 
would  be-  obliged  to  make  two  tacks  in  order  to 
weather  it.  But  he  had  the  wind  freer  than  I,  for 
he  had  evidently  run  off  to  leeward  for  the  sole 
purpose  of  setting  his  jib  without  disturbing  me. 

As  I  was  approaching  the  point  of  land,  the 
Fiorina  came  within  hailing  distance  of  me. 

"  Marian,  ahoy  !  Where  are  you  going,  Phil?" 
shouted  Mr.  Whippleton,  wrathfully. 

"  After  you." 

"  Another  blunder,  you  blockhead  !  Come  about, 
and  take  me  on  board." 

I  was  willing  to  comply  with  this  request,  for  it 
seemed  reasonable  to  me.  Both  boats  were 
heaved  to,  and  Mr.  Whippleton  put  off  in  one  of 
the  tenders. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      275 


CHAPTER  XXIY. 

IN    WHICH    PHIL    GOES    TO    SLEEP,    AND    HIS    SEVEREST 
CATASTROPHE    COMES. 

"  "T1TTHAT  are  you  doing  here?"  demanded 
T  ¥  Mr.  Whippleton,  angrily,  as  he  came 
alongside  of  the  Marian  in  the  tender. 

"  I  was  only  looking  to  see  where  you  were 
going.  I  was  afraid  you  might  forget  that  I 
was  here,  and  go  off  without  me." 

"  You  are  a  fool !  You  make  more  blunders 
in  the  same  time  than  any  other  fellow  that 
ever  I  saw,"  he  added,  interlarding  his  elegant 
discourse  with  coarse  and  horrid  oaths.  "  Why 
didn't  you  stay  where  you  were  till  I  came 
back?" 

'•'  I  was  not  quite  sure  that  you  would  come 
back." 

"  You  were  not  ?  Who  set  you  to  dog  all  m^ 
movements  ?  " 


276 


"  I  set  myself  to  do  it ;  and  I  intend  to  carry 
out  my  plan.  I  thought  you  were  going  to 
Chicago  with  me." 

"  I  am,  if  you  don't  ground  that  boat,  or  wreck 
her,  before  I  get  ready.  You  go  blundering 
about  a  place  you  know  nothing  at  all  about, 
as  though  you  considered  the  safety  of  that  boat 
of  no  consequence." 

"  I  consider  your  safety  as  of  a  great  deal 
more  consequence,"  I  answered,  with  becoming 
frankness.  "  If  you  are  going  to  Chicago  with 
me,  what  are  you  doing  in  that  corner  of  the 
lagoon  ?  " 

"  You  are  the  stupidest  blockhead  I  ever  saw, 
for  one  who  knows  how  to  keep  a  set  of  books. 
Are  you  simpleton  enough  to  suppose  I  would 
leave  the  Fiorina  opposite  the  mouth  of  the 
river,  where  she  would  drag  her  anchor  in  the 
first  blow  that  came?"  growled  Mr.  Whippleton, 
with  increased  vehemence  and  anger.  "  I  was 
going  to  moor  her  behind  this  headland,  where 
she  will  be  safe  till  I  can  come  after  her." 

-"  You  were  very  careful  not  to  wake  me,  when 
you  got  up  your  anchor." 

"  What    do    you    suppose    I    cared   whether    I 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      277 

waked  you  or  not,  you  blunderhead.  Now  stand 
by  here  till  we  have  moored  the  Fiorina.  Let 
go  your  anchor." 

"  I  can  keep  her  where  she  is  as  long  as  there 
is  a  breeze.  Moor  your  boat,  and  I  am  all  ready 
for  Chicago." 

Mr.  Whippleton  pulled  back  to  his  yacht, 
and  sailed  her  a  short  distance  inside  of  the 
point,  where  I  heard  the  splash  of  the  anchor. 
His  explanation  of  his  movement  was  reason 
able  enough,  and  if  I  had  been  disposed  to  be 
satisfied  with  anything  he  said  or  did  which 
involved  his  absence  in  the  body  from  me,  I 
might  have  been  contented  with  it.  The  more  de 
termined  he  was  in  charging  me  with  blunders, 
the  better  I  was  satisfied  that  my  course  was 
right;  and  I  preferred  to  let  the  future  rather 
than  the  present  justify  my  conduct. 

"What's  the  matter,  Philip?"  asked  Marian, 
opening  the  slide  of  the  cabin. 

"  Nothing;  it  is  all  right  now." 

"  But  I  heard  some  hard  words  just  now,"  she 
persisted. 

"  Mr.  Whippleton  thinks  I  have  made  anothef 
blunder  — that's  all." 


278  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OB 

I  told  her  what  had  occurred,  and  that,  as 
there  was  a  little  breeze,  we  should  probably 
start  for  Chicago  in  a  short  time.  I  advised  her 
to  return  to  her  berth,  and  not  be  disturbed  by 
anything  she  heard.  She  acknoAvledged  that 
she  had  slept  very  well  till  the  noise  awoke  her, 
and  she  was  willing  to  repeat  the  experiment. 
She  retired,  closed  and  fastened  the  slide  behind 
her.  In  about  half  an  hour  Mr.  Whippleton  and 
Peter  came  on  board. 

"  Gorrificious  !  "  exclaimed  the  cook.  "  Are 
you  going  to  sea  without  us,  and  carry  off  all 
the  whiskey  ?  " 

I  thought,  from  the  movements  of  the  negro, 
he  was  carrying  off  considerable  of  it;  and  the 
fumes  of  Mr.  Whippleton's  breath  indicated  that 
he  had  not  entirely  neglected  the  bottle.  But  it 
did  not  have  a  happy  effect  upon  him,  as  it 
sometimes  does,  for  he  was  decidedly  ugly.  I 
believe  that  liquor  intensifies  whatever  emo 
tions  may  prevail  in  the  mind  of  the  toper  while 
under  its  influence.  Joy  is  more  joyous,  grief 
is  more  grievous,  under  its  sway  j  and  a  man 
who  is  ugly  when  sober  is  ten  times  worse  when 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      279 

drunk.  A  man  who  has  an  ugly  fit  is  the  uglier 
for  the  rum  he  has  drunk. 

Mr.  Whippletou  had  an  ugly  fit  upon  him 
when  he  came  on  board  of  the  Marian.  He  was 
probably  disappointed  and  vexed  at  my  conduct, 
and  having  drank  several  glasses  of  whiskey,  he 
was  really  so  ugly  as  to  make  himself  very  un 
comfortable.  He  filled  away  the  yacht,  and, 
taking  the  helm,  began  to  rate  me  over  again 
for  my  blunders.  As  we  were,  to  the  best  of 
my  knowledge  and  belief,  bound  to  Chicago,  I 
did  not  care  much  what  he  said,  and  I  was 
willing  he  should  waste  his  venom  in  any  way 
he  pleased. 

The  breeze  was  very  light  and  fitful.  We  ran 
out  of  the  lagoon  into  the  open  lake,  after  a 
while ;  but  there  was  hardly  wind  enough  there 
to  fill  the  sails.  It  was  still  dull  sailing,  and 
I  was  very  sleepy  and  stupid  in  spite  of  the 
abuse  with  which  Mr.  Whippleton  regaled  me. 
He  had  brought  his  whiskey  bottles  back  with 
him,  and  several  times  he  imbibed  from  one  of 
them.  Peter  went  forward  with  his  bottle,  and 
stretched  himself  on  the  forecastle. 

The   helmsman   yawned,   and   I   yawned.     The 


280 

Marian,  close-hauled,  was  not  making  two  knots 
an  hour.  We  were  headed  about  north-west, 
which  was  not  nearly  so  close  to  the  wind  as 
the  boat  could  lay. 

"  We  shall  not  get  to  Chicago  in  twenty-four 
hours  at  this  rate,"  said  Mr.  Whippleton,  when 
he  had  wasted  all  his  vituperative  rhetoric 
upon  me. 

"  Not  in  forty-eight,  if  you  don't  keep  her  a 
little  closer  to  the  wind/'  I  replied. 

"  Do  you  sail  this  boat,  or  do  I  ? "  he  de 
manded. 

"  Well,  sir,  you  and  that  whiskey  bottle  ap 
pear  to  be  doing  it  just  now ;  and  between  you 
both  you  are  not  doing  it  very  well." 

"  None  of  your  impudence  !  Perhaps  you  are 
conceited  enough  to  think  you  could  do  it 
better." 

"  I  confess  that  I  am." 

"  You  will  mind  your  own  business,  Phil." 

"  I  haven't  any  to  mind." 

"  Go  to  sleep  then  !  " 

"What  time  is  it,  sir?" 

"  About  half  past  twelve." 

"  I  will  take  my  turn  at  the  helm,  if  you  like/1 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      281 

"I  won't  trust  you  at  the  helm.  You  make 
too  many  blunders." 

"  Then  I  will  take  a  nap  myself." 

"  That  will  be  the  only  sensible  thing  you 
have  done  to-night." 

I  thought  it  would  be  sensible,  at  any  rate, 
and  as  there  was  not  much  comfort  in  talking 
to  a  man  as  waspish  as  he  was,  I  concluded  to 
take  his  advice.  I  stretched  myself  on  the  cush 
ions,  on  the  lee  side,  out  of  the  helmsman's  way, 
covered  myself  with  the  blanket,  and  was  soon 
asleep.  Perhaps  I  am  conceited :  I  will  not  say 
that  I  am  not;  but  in  the  light  of  subsequent 
events,  I  must  say  it  was  the  only  blunder  I 
made  that  night  —  going  to  sleep. 

I  was  tired  enough  to  sleep  soundly,  and  as 
the  yacht  was  bound  to  Chicago,  I  had  nothing 
more  to  worry  me ;  so  I  did  sleep  soundly.  If 
nothing  had  occurred  to  disturb  me,  doubtless  I 
should  have  made  up  my  six  hours  before  morn 
ing.  Unfortunately  something  did  occur  to  dis. 
turb  me  —  something  sudden  and  violent. 

A  heavy  hand  was  laid  upon  me,  and  I  awoke. 

I  tried  to  gain  my  feet,  but  a  desperate  clutch 
was  upon  my  throat.  Mr.  Whippleton  was  bend- 


282  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

ing  over  me ;  his  right  hand  was  choking  me, 
while  his  left  grasped  a  rope.  I  tried  to  scream, 
but  the  hard  hand  choked  me.  I  realized  that 
I  was  in  the  power  of  my  enemy,  and  I  made  a 
desperate  struggle  to  free  myself  from  his  grasp. 
I  thought  I  was  succeeding,  when  a  crushing 
blow  fell  upon  my  head ;  my  brain  sparkled  as 
with  a  shower  of  stars.  I  remember  no  more  of 
the  affray. 

The  first  sensation  that  I  experienced  was  a 
deadly  sickness  and  faintness.  My  senses  slowly 
came  back  to  me,  and  I  found  myself  lying  upon 
the  cushions  of  the  standing-room,  with  Marian 
Collingsby  leaning  over  me,  bathing  my  brow. 
My  head  seemed  to  be  bursting  with  pain  and 
fulness.  I  tried  to  raise  my  hand  to  ascertain  the 
extent  of  my  injuries ;  but  I  found  that  my  wrists 
were  tied  together  behind  me. 

"  0,  Philip  !  Philip  !  "  cried  Marian,  as  I  opened 
my  eyes  and  realized  my  situation. 

I  raised  my  head  and  looked  around  me. 
Peter  was  at  the  helm,  and  the  yacht  was 
bounding  along  at  a  lively  rate  over  the  waves. 
On  the  cushion  opposite  me  lay  Mr.  Whippleton, 
enveloped  in  blankets,  and  apparently  asleep. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      283 

ft  How  do  you  feel,  Philip  ?  "  asked  Marian,  who 
was  in  as  much  distress  as  I  was. 

"My  head  aches  terribly/'  I  replied,  faintly; 
and  a  kind  of  deadly  sickness  came  over  me 
again. 

She  bathed  my  head  again  with  spirits,  and 
the  act  revived  me. 

"  This  is  terrible/'  said  she,  trembling  with 
emotion. 

"  Don't  be  alarmed,  Marian ;  I  shall  be  bet 
ter  soon/'  I  replied,  trying  to  change  my  posi 
tion,  for  I  was  lying  on  one  of  my  arms,  and 
was  very  uncomfortable. 

"  Won't  you  untie  him,  Peter  ? JJ  said  my  fair 
attendant,  appealing  to  the  black  helmsman. 

"  Gorrificious !  I'd  like  to  do  it  first  rate ; 
but  I  dassent,"  he  answered,  glancing  at  the 
form  of  Mr.  Whippleton,  who  was  snoring  heavily 
under  the  influence  of  the  frequent  drams  he 
had  taken. 

"  Then  I  will,"  she  added,  resolutely. 

"  Don't  do  it,  miss.  Mr.  Whippleton  is  un 
common  ugly." 

u  I  don't  care  how  ugly  he  is.  I  am  not  afraid 
of  him  now.  Where  is  your  knife,  Philip?  " 


284 

"  In  my  vest  pocket,"  I  replied,  encouraged 
by  a  hope  that  the  resolute  girl  might  set  me  free. 

"  Mustn't  do  it,  miss.  Skipper  told  me  to  look 
out  for  the  young  gentleman.  You  mustn't  do 
anything  to  make  Mr.  Whippleton  angry  with 
you;  he'll  treat  you  bad  if  you  do.  He  was 
uncommon  ugly  this  mornin',  and  kicked  rne  three 
times  in  the  ribs  to  wake  me,  and  then  cussed 
me  like  I  wan't  no  account." 

I  suspected  that  Peter  had  been  sleeping 
off  the  fumes  of  whiskey  when  this  ungentle 
treatment  was  bestowed  upon  him.  Marian  put 
her  hand  into  my  vest  pocket  and  took  out  my 
knife.  She  opened  it,  and  was  about  to  find 
the  rope  that  bound  me,  when  the  helmsman 
again  interfered. 

"  Can't  let  you  do  it.  Very  sorry,  but  I  can't. 
It  would  cost  me  all  the  rest  of  the  ribs  in  my 
body,  and  three  on  'em's  broke  now." 

"  Will  you  let  this  young  man  be  abused  in 
this  manner,  you  wretch?"  exclaimed  Marian, 
whose  gentle  nature  seemed  to  have  assumed  a 
new  phase. 

"  I  can't  help  it,  miss ;  'tain't  my  fault.  Mr. 
Whippleton's  very  ugly  this  morninV1' 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      285 

"  You  are  a  brute  and  a  coward ! "    said    she, 


reaching  over  me  to  the  cords  that  bound  my 
wrists. 

"  Gorrificious  ! "  shouted  the  negro.  "  You 
mustn't  do  that." 

Mr.  Whippleton  suddenly  sprang  to  his  feet, 
awakened  by  the  cry  of  Peter.  Rushing  forward, 
he  seized  the  arm  of  Marian,  and  dragged  her 
away  from  me.  As  the  negro  had  intimated,  he 
certainly  was  uncommon  ugly.  His  eyes  were 
bloodshot,  and  his  expression  was  savage. 

"  Let  him  alone,"  said  he.  "  Let  no  one  meddle 
with  him." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton,  are  you  going  to  let  him 
lie  there  in  pain,  with  his  hands  tied  behind 
him  ?  " 

"  That's  just  what  I  am  going  to  do,"  said  he, 
taking  a  bottle  of  whiskey  from  under  the  seat, 
and  pouring  a  quantity  down  his  throat. 

Perhaps  he  was  afraid  that  his  courage  would 
fail  him,  if  he  were  not  again  fortified  by  the 
fiend  which  had  doubtless  inspired  the  evil  deed 
he  had  done  to  me. 

"  I  can  believe  anything  of  you  now,  Mr. 
Whippleton,"  added  Marian,  courageously. 


286  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

"  Believe  anything  you  please,  Miss  Collingsby. 
You  will  have  all  you  want  to  do  to  think  of 
yourself,  without  troubling  your  head  about  Phil. 
I  have  taught  him  to  mind  his  own  business,  and 
I  am  going  to  repeat  the  lesson  upon  you.  Go 
into  the  cabin  !  " 

"  Won't  you  release  Philip  —  at  least,  untie  his 
wrists  ?  " 

"No,  I  won't.  Go  into  the  cabin,  and  stay 
there.  I  don't  mean  to  have  you  on  deck." 

He  moved  towards  her,  and  she  was  compelled 
to  retire  to  the  cabin  in  order  to  escape  further 
violence.  I  felt  that  I  was  alone  then.  My 
worst,  and  it  seemed  to  me  then  my  last,  ca 
tastrophe  had  come.  I  regretted  my  blunder 
in  going  to  sleep,  and  the  future  was  dark 
and  uncertain. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.  287 


CHAPTER    XXV. 

IN   WHICH    PHIL    SUFFERS    MUCH    PAIN,    AND     MARIAN 
IS   VERY    RESOLUTE. 

AFTER  my  catastrophe,  the  course  of  the 
yacht  had  been  altered,  and  I  found  that 
she  was  now  headed  to  the  northward.  As  I 
raised  my  head  to  change  my  painful  position,  I 
saw  the  east  coast  of  the  lake,  not  half  a  mile  dis 
tant.  The  breeze  was  very  gentle,  and  it  was  a 
beautiful  day.  The  sun  was  shining  brightly,  and 
the  ripple  of  the  clear  waters  was  musical ;  but  I 
was  not  in  a  condition  to  enjoy  the  glories  of  the 
scene. 

I  was  suffering  with  a  severe  pain  in  the  head ; 
but  the  defeat  I  had  sustained  troubled  me  much 
more.  I  wondered,  now  it  was  too  late,  that  I  had 
been  so  stupid  as  to  go  to  sleep.  I  felt  that  I  was 
as  great  a  blockhead  as  my  persecutor  had  accused 
me  of  being,  and  I  forgave  him  for  calling  me  one. 


288 

I  could  not  foresee  the  end  of  the  adventure,  or 
the  disastrous  results  of  my  mistake.  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  had  doubtless  been  fully  alarmed  by  my 
statements  in  regard  to  his  arrest.  If  he  had 
really  sold  his  yacht,  he  did  not  deem  it  prudent 
to  visit  St.  Joseph  in  order  to  deliver  it  to  the 
purchaser.  He  would  not  find  it  safe  to  land  at 
any  of  the  towns  on  the  lake,  and  I  was  satisfied 
that  he  would  make  for  some  obscure  port  in  Can 
ada.  He  was  a  shrewd  man,  and  would  not  incur 
any  needless  risk. 

As  nearly  as  I  could  calculate  the  distance,  he 
would  have  to  run  four  or  five  hundred  miles  to 
reach  any  point  in  Canada.  The  prospect  was  not 
pleasing.  I  was  fond  of  sailing,  but  not  under  the 
present  circumstances.  The  distance  to  be  accom 
plished  in  such  a  boat  would  require  three  days 
with  a  favorable  wind ;  and  it  might  take  ten.  I 
did  not  believe  Mr.  Whippleton  would  be  disposed 
to  run  at  night,  for  the  whiskey,  which  he  now 
used  without  restraint,  could  be  more  safely  en 
joyed  in  port. 

I  hoped  for  some  favorable  circumstance  which 
would  turn  the  tide  in  my  favor.  This  was  all  I 
could  do,  for,  with  my  hands  securely  tied  behind 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       289 

me,  I  was  powerless.  The  skipper  had  renewed 
his  devotions  to  the  bottle  as  soon  as  he  waked, 
and  it  was  possible  that  the  liquor  might  win  the 
victory  for  me. 

"  Go  and  get  us  some  breakfast,  Peter,"  said  Mr. 
Whippleton,  after  he  had  taken  a  second  dram,  as 
he  took  the  helm  from  the  cook. 

"  Yes,  sir/'7  replied  Peter,  as  he  went  forward. 

"I  hope  you  are  satisfied  now,  Phil,"  added  Mr. 
Whippleton,  turning  to  me  with  something  like  a 
chuckle,  as  though  he  had  done  a  great  thing. 

"  I  am  satisfied  on  one  point,"  I  replied. 

"What's  that?" 

"That  I  was  not  mistaken  in  regard  to  your 
dealings  with  the  firm." 

"  We  won't  discuss  that  question  now,"  said  he, 
with  a  sneer.  "  I  have  used  you  well ;  I  have 
done  everything  for  you  ;  I  have  given  you  all  the 
salary  you  asked,  and  given  you  a  chance  to  get 
ahead." 

"  You  have  given  me  a  chance  to  get  a  broken 
head,"  I  replied,  as  he  paused  to  think  what  other 
good  thing  he  had  done  for  me. 

"  That's  your  own  fault.     After  all  I  had  done 
for  you,  I  have  my  reward  in  your  ingratitude." 
19 


290 

"  Did  you  expect  me  to  help  you  swindle  the 
firm?"  I  demanded,  indignantly. 

"  You  are  not  in  condition  just  now  to  use  hard 
words,  and  I  advise  you  to  clap  a  stopper  on  that 
tongue  of  yours." 

"  If  I  say  anything,  I  shall  speak  my  mind.  I 
know  you  now  perfectly.  Last  night  I  thought 
I  might  be  mistaken  about  some  things.  Now  I 
know  that  you  have  swindled  your  partner,  and  I 
am  not  surprised  to  find  that  you  can  handle  a 
bludgeon  as  well  as  a  pen." 

"  Better  be  civil,  Phil,"  said  he,  biting  his  lip. 

"  I  have  nothing  more  to  say.  If  you  murder 
me,  I  shall  feel  that  I  have  tried  to  do  my  duty." 

"  I  don't  intend  to  murder  you." 

"  I  have  no  doubt  you  will  if  the  occasion  seems 
to  require  it.  I  shall  trust  in  God,  and  leave  the 
crime  with  him." 

He  said  no  more  then.  When  breakfast  was 
ready,  Peter  relieved  him  at  the  helm,  and  he 
went  below.  I  heard  him  talking  to  Marian,  and 
she  answered  him  with  spirit.  Though  I  could 
not  distinguish  her  words,  I  was  sure  that  she  was 
protesting  against  his  cruelty  to  me.  In  about 
half  an  hour  he  returned  to  the  helm  again,  and 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       291 

my  fair  cousin  followed  him,  either  with  or  with 
out  his  permission. 

"  How  do  you  feel,  Phil  ?  "  she  asked,  taking  her 
place  by  my  side  again,  and  bathing  my  head  with 
spirits,  as  before. 

"  I  think  my  head  feels  a  little  better." 

"  Do  you  rest  easily  now  ?  " 

"  Not  very  ;  I  have  to  lie  upon  my  hands  or  one 
of  my  arms." 

"  Mr.  Whippleton,  if  you  are  not  a  brute,  you 
will  untie  his  hands,"  she  continued,  appealing  to 
the  skipper. 

"  Then  I  am  a  brute,"  he  answered,  with  a 
coarse  grin. 

"  Why  should  you  compel  him  to  suffer  pain  ?  " 

"  I  hope  it  will  make  him  change  his  tone.  He 
is  as  saucy  and  as  impudent  as  though  he  were 
the  victor  and  I  the  vanquished." 

"  He  will  not  be  impudent  again,  if  you  will 
unloose  him,"  added  Marian,  in  a  gentle,  pleading 
tone. 

"  Will  he  promise  it  ?  " 

"You  will  — won't  you,  Philip?" 

"  I  will  promise  not  to  say  anything  to  him,"  I 
replied. 


292 


"  He  is  willing  to  promise,"  continued  she. 

"  Then  I  won't  let  him  loose.  He  is  an  obsti 
nate  mule,  and  ready  to  kick  the  one  who  does 
him  a  favor.  Though  I  have  been  his  best  friend 
in  Chicago,  he  volunteers  to  hunt  me  down  like  a 
wild  beast.  He  has  his  reward." 

"  But  what  are  you  going  to  do  with  him  ?  "  in 
quired  Marian. 

"  I  intend  to  shoot  him/'  replied  Mr.  Whippleton, 
as  he  took  a  draught  from  his  bottle,  and  then  pro 
duced  a  revolver,  with  which  he  toyed  as  though 
it  had  been  a  pet  plaything.  "  I  am  prepared  for 
the  worst,  and  I  shall  never  be  safe  while  he  is 
above  the  sod." 

"Would  you  be  a  murderer?"  asked  Marian, 
with  horror. 

"  Phil  says  I  would,  and  I  may  be  obliged  to 
verify  his  words." 

"  I  did  not  think  you  were  such  a  monster  !  " 
exclaimed  my  fair  companion,  with  a  shudder. 

"  I  did  not  think  so  myself;  but  Phil  keeps 
goading  rne  on,  and  I  don't  know  what  I  may  be 
come.  If  he  had  minded  his  own  business,  and 
not  troubled  himself  about  mine,  he  would  have 
been  safe  in  Ciiicago  to-day." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      293 

"  But  you  don't  mean  to  kill  him  ?  " 

"That  will  depend  upon  himself — and  you." 

"  Upon  me  ?  " 

"  Yes,  upon  you,  in  part." 

"What  shall  I  do?" 

"  Sit  down,  Miss  Collingsby,  and  make  your 
self  comfortable,"  he  continued,  with  a  smile,  as 
though  he  were  rather  pleased  with  his  own  re 
flections. 

"  I  will  say  anything  I  can  to  my  father,  and  I 
will  induce  my  mother  to  speak  for  you,"  said  she, 
seating  herself  near  my  head. 

"  I  know  your  father  better  than  you  do,  Miss 
Collingsby.  He  would  be  ashamed  of  himself  to 
be  influenced  by  you,  or  by  your  mother.  I  won't 
trust  him  till  I  have  a  hold  upon  him.  I  don't 
ask  for  any  pleading  in  my  behalf,  because  I  know 
it  would  do  no  good." 

"  What  do  you  wish  me  to  do  ?  " 

"  I  had  a  rather  brilliant  thought  just  now,"  said 
he,  chuckling,  and  looking  very  silly,  partly  from 
the  effects  of  the  whiskey  he  had  drank,  and 
partly  from  the  nature  of  his  own  thoughts. 

He  paused,  as  though  he  was  not  quite  ready  to 
express  the  brilliant  thought.  *He  turned  over 


294 

the  pistol  in  his  hand,  and  glanced  foolishly  at 
Miss  Collingsby. 

"  What  can  I  do  ?  "  asked  Marian,  evidently  dis 
gusted  with  his  manner. 

"  I  want  some  security  for  your  father's  good 
behavior,"  he  replied. 

"  I  will  plead  with  him." 

"  It  will  do  no  good." 

"  What  would  you  have  me  do  ?  " 

"  I  think  I  heard  you  say  you  would  not  marry 
my  friend  Ben  Waterford,  under  any  circum 
stances." 

"  I  certainly  would  not,"  answered  Marian. 

"  Exactly  so ;  I  don't  wish  to  do  anything  to  in 
terfere  with  Ben's  plans,  for  he  is  a  good  fellow. 
We  started  from  Chicago  with  the  intention  of 
having  a  wedding,  and  I  think  we  ought  to  carry 
out  the  programme,"  laughed  the  skipper.  "  You 
are  a  very  pretty  girl,  Miss  Collingsby.  As  the 
son-in-law  of  your  father,  I  think  I  could  make  a 
favorable  settlement  with  him.  I  am  only  twenty- 
seven." 

"  You  have  said  enough,  sir,"  replied  she,  indig 
nantly. 

"  Don't  be  hasty,  my  pretty  one.     If  you  will 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      295 

do  me  the  honor  to  become  Mrs.  Whippleton,  it 
will  make  everything  all  right ;  and  really  I  don't 
know  what  else  to  do  with  you." 

"  Don't  listen  to  him,  Marian,"  I  interposed,  in  a 
low  tone.  "  Go  into  the  cabin,  and  keep  out  of 
his  sight." 

"  This  plan  will  make  everything  comfortable, 
Miss  Collingsby.  Your  father  will  see  that  he  is 
mistaken,  arid  the  business  of  the  firm  will  go  on 
as  usual,  with  your  friend  Phil  as  book-keeper  at  a 
thousand  dollars  a  year.  Will  you  accept  ?  " 

"  No,  sir." 

"No?" 

"  Certainly  not." 

"  Then  I  suppose  I  may  as  well  make  an  end  of 
Phil.  He  is  only  a  stumbling-block  in  my  path/' 
added  the  wretch,  cocking  his  pistol. 

"  Gorrificious  1 "  exclaimed  Peter,  appearing  at 
the  companion-way  at  this  moment,  so  opportunely 
as  to  indicate  that  he  had  been  listening  to  the 
conversation.  "  What  you  goin'  to  do  with  that 
rewolver,  Mr.  Whippleton  ?  " 

"  Go  into  the  cook-room,  and  mind  your  business 
there,  you  scoundrel,"  said  the  skipper,  angrily,  as 
he  pointed  the  pistol  at  the  cook. 


296  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  Gorrificious ! "  muttered  the  man,  as  he  disap 
peared. 

Marian,  indignant  at  the  proposal  of  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton,  followed  the  cook,  and  I  was  alone  with  my 
persecutor.  The  skipper  laid  his  revolver  upon 
the  rudder-head,  as  though  the  end  of  the  sensa 
tion  had  come  for  the  present.  I  was  left  to  my 
own  suffering  for  the  next  two  hours.  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  sat  at  the  helm  in  silence,  perhaps  brooding 
upon  the  plan  his  busy  brain  had  devised.  Oc 
casionally  he  raised  the  whiskey  bottle  to  his  lips, 
and  drank.  I  was  afraid  that  his  frequent  drams 
would  arouse  the  fiend  within  him,  and  induce  him 
to  use  his  revolver  upon  me.  He  was  intoxicated, 
and  violently  irritated  against  me.  My  anxiety 
for  my  fate  was  so  great  that  I  almost  forgot  my 
aching  head  and  painful  limbs.  I  kept  very  still. 
No  one  had  thought  to  give  me  any  breakfast ; 
but  I  did  not  feel  the  need  of  it,  though  a  cup  of 
tea  would  doubtless  have  done  me  good. 

I  was  still  in  doubt  whether  the  whiskey  bottle 
would  ultimately  prove  to  be  my  friend  or  my  foe. 
The  skipper  maintained  his  position  at  the  helm 
till  dinner  was  ready,  and  then  was  able  to  totter 
into  the  cabin,  when  Peter  had  taken  his  place. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      297 

He  did  not  come  on  deck  when  he  had  finished  his 
meal ;  but  Marian  soon  appeared,  and  said  he  had 
tumbled  into  one  of  the  berths.  He  had  taken  his 
revolver  with  him. 

"  Can't  you  turn  over,  Philip  ?  "  said  she,  stand 
ing  beside  me.  "  I  will  cut  your  cords." 

"  No  !  Don't  do  that.  Gorrificious  !  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  will  kill  us  all.'7 

But  I  turned  over,  as  far  as  I  was  able,  and 
the  resolute  girl  cut  the  rope  that  bound  my  hands 
together.  She  had  hardly  done  so  before  Peter 
sprang  upon  her,  and  hurled  her  over  to  the  other 
side  of  the  standing-room.  I  disengaged  my 
hands ;  but  the  line  which  secured  my  feet  was 
made  fast  to  a  cleat,  and  when  I  attempted  to  rise, 
I  was  thrown  down  upon  the  floor.  Peter  leaped 
upon  me,  and  shouted  for  Mr.  Whippleton. 


298  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 


CHAPTER  XXVI. 

IN   WHICH   PHIL    FINDS    THE    TABLES    TURNED,    AND 
THE   MARIAN   RUNS   INTO    CHICAGO    RIVER. 


ORRIFICIOUS!—  Mr.  Whippleton!"  shout- 
ed  Peter,  as  he  lay  down  upon  me. 

"  Let  him  alone,  Peter,"  pleaded  Marian,  as  she 
rushed  to  the  rope  which  bound  my  feet. 

"  Can't  do  it,  miss.  Mr.  Whippleton  will  shoot 
me,"  answered  the  cook,  in  high  excitement. 

Marian  cast  off  the  rope  which  bound  me  to  the 
cleat,  and  then  untied  my  feet  ;  but  the  negro  had 
placed  his  knee  upon  my  breast,  and  held  me  by 
the  throat  with  both  hands.  The  condition  to 
which  I  was  reduced  was  desperate,  and  only  des 
perate  measures  could  redeem  me.  I  began  to 
struggle,  and  when  my  feet  were  free,  I  began  to 
use  them  with  considerable  vigor.  But  I  was 
very  feeble,  and  with  the  advantage  he  had  over 
me,  I  was  not  equal  even  to  the  old  negro. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      299 

The  battle  was  going  against  me,  and  I  heard 
the  uncertain  movements  of  Mr.  Whippleton  in  the 
cabin.  Marian  wrung  her  hands  in  despair,  when 
she  saw  her  resolute  effort  apparently  so  signally 
defeated.  Out  of  breath  and  out  of  strength,  I  was 
compelled  to  abandon  the  struggle  as  useless ;  but 
my  fair  ally  was  not  so  demoralized.  She  took  the 
tin  cup,  which  the  negro  used  for  his  drams,  and 
pouring  some  whiskey  from  the  skipper's  bottle, 
she  dashed  it  into  the  face  of  the  cook,  just  as 
Mr.  Whippleton  was  coming  up  the  steps  from  the 
cabin. 

"  Gorrificious !  "  yelled  the  negro,  blinded  by 
the  potent  liquor,  and  smarting  with  pain  in  his 
eyes. 

I  made  one  more  desperate  effort  to  free  myself, 
and  as  Peter  was  obliged  to  use  his  hands  for  the 
comfort  of  his  eyes,  1  easily  shook  him  off  this 
time.  At  the  same  instant  the  crack  of  the  revolver 
startled  me  ;  but  I  was  not  hit.  Marian  stood  near 
me  with  a  large  champagne  bottle,  from  which  she 
had  poured  the  whiskey,  in  her  hand.  I  seized  it, 
and  sprang  upon  Mr.  Whippleton  as  he  aimed  his 
pistol  at  me  the  second  time. 


300  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

I  struck  him  a  heavy  blow  upon  the  head  with 
the  bottle,  and  he  fell  back  into  the  cabin. 

My  strength  seemed  to  come  back,  as  the  prospect 
brightened  before  me.  I  descended  to  the  cabin,  and 
proceeded  to  ascertain  the  condition  of  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton. . 

"  Is  he  dead  ?  "  gasped  Marian. 

"  No ;  I  think  not,"  as  I  felt  of  his  pulse,  and 
then  of  his  breast  to  see  if  his  heart  still  beat. 

"  0,  I  hope  not,"  cried  she,  terrified  at  the 
tragedy  of  which  she  had  become  a  part. 

"  Gorrificious ! "  howled  Peter,  who  had  been 
washing  his  eyes  at  the  side,  and  was  now  able  to 
use  them  again. 

1  picked  up  Mr.  Whippleton's  pistol,  and  re 
turned  to  the  standing-room,  to  guard  against  any 
attack  on  the  part  of  the  cook. 

"  Don't  shoot  me,  Mr.  Phil,  don't !  "  cried  he. 

"I  won't,  if  you  behave  yourself;  but  if  you 
don't  obey  all  my  orders,  I  will  put  a  bullet 
through  your  head.  Do  you  hear  me  ? " 

"  I  hear  you,  Mr.  Phil.  'Tain't  none  of  my  quar 
rel,  and  I  don't  care  nothing  at  all  about  it.  I  obeys 
orders  whoever  is  in  command,"  he  replied,  rul> 
bing  his  eyes  with  his  handkerchief. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.  .     301 

With  his  aid  I  lifted  the  form  of  Mr.  Whippleton 
from  the  cabin  floor,  and  we  bore  it  to  the  seat  in 
the  standing-room,  where  I  had  lain  so  many 
hours.  The  Marian  had  come  up  into  the  wind 
when  the  cook  left  the  helm,  and  I  put  her  about, 
heading  her  to  the  south-west.  Miss  Collingsby 
took  the  helm  at  my  request.  She  was  pale  and 
excited ;  but  she  was  firm.  For  my  own  part  I  felt 
like  a  new  man,  and  the  new  order  of  things  seemed 
to  soothe  the  pain  I  was  still  suffering. 

I  examined  Mr.  Whippleton  very  carefully  again. 
I  felt  the  beatings  of  his  heart,  and  I  was  satisfied 
that  he  was  not  more  severely  injured  than  I  had 
been. 

I  did  not  intend  to  make  any  more  mistakes,  and 
with  the  same  cord  which  had  confined  my  hands, 
I  tied  his  wrists  together  behind  him.  I  secured 
his  feet,  and  made  him  fast  to  the  jib-sheet  cleat. 
He  was  now  in  precisely  the  same  situation  as 
that  to  which  I  had  been  reduced,  and  in  which  I 
had  been  only  half  an  hour  before.  He  lay  very 
still;  but  I  was  satisfied  so  long  as  I  knew  that  he 
breathed.  His  face  was  covered  with  blood,  for 
the  bottle  had  broken  under  the  blow,  and  cut  his 


302  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

head.  I  directed  Peter  to  wash  his  face  and  bathe 
his  head  in  spirits. 

"  Gorrificious !  Things  is  turned  right  over," 
said  he. 

"  They  are  ;  and,  Peter,  I  give  you  the  same  in 
structions  which  Mr.  Whippleton  gave  you.  Don't 
you  let  him  get  away,"  I  added,  as  I  seated  my 
self  at  the  side  of  Marian. 

"  No,  sir." 

"  I'm  not  drunk,  Peter." 

"  No,  sir ;  sober's  you  was  the  day  you  was 
born,"  chattered  the  cook. 

"  If  you  want  to  get  back  to  Chicago  without  a 
hole  in  your  head,  you  will  see  that  Mr.  Whipple 
ton  don't  get  loose.  I  shall  keep  this  pistol  beside 
me,  and  I  shall  not  go  to  sleep." 

"  Yes,  sir.     I  understand." 

"  See  that  you  mind." 

"Don't  be  afraid  of  me,  Mr.  Philip.  I  always 
minds  the  captain,  whoever  he  is,"  replied  the  po 
lite  cook,  who,  like  thousands  of  others,  was  dis 
posed  to  submit  to  the  powers  that  be  without 
asking  any  questions. 

I  did  not  mean  to  depend  upon  him  for  any  ser 
vice,  except  in  the  cabin  and  cook-room,  and  I  was 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      303 

confident  that  the  pistol  would  make  him  obedient. 
Peter  rubbed  the  head  of  his  late  master  dil 
igently,  as  I  told  him  to  do,  until  his  patient 
showed  signs  of  returning  animation ;  but  he  did 
not  come  to  his  senses  for  two  hours.  He  was 
thoroughly  steeped  in  whiskey  j  indeed,  the  yacht 
had  the  odor  of  a  rum-shop,  with  what  had  been 
drank  and  what  had  been  spilled. 

u  How  do  you  feel,  Phil  ? "  asked  Marian,  after 
the  excitement  had  partially  subsided. 

"  Better,  much  better." 

"  Does  your  head  ache  now  ?  " 

"  It  does,  severely,  I  should  say,  under  ordinary 
circumstances ;  but  I  don't  mind  it  now,  since  the 
prospect  is  changed.  You  are  a  brave  girl,  Mar 
ian,"  I  added,  gazing  at  her  with  admiration. 

"  I  was  terribly  frightened.  I  was  afraid  Mr. 
Whippleton  would  shoot  you." 

"  I  think  he  would ;  he  did  fire  at  me ;  but  he 
was  too  tipsy  to  take  aim." 

"  Whiskey  has  been  our  friend,  this  time." 

"  It  is  more  apt  to  be  our  friend  when  our  ene 
mies  drink  it  than  when  we  drink  it  ourselves. 
That  was  a  happy  expedient  of  yours,  to  give 
Peter  a  dram  in  the  eyes." 


304 

"  Gorrificious  !  "  exclaimed  the  cook.  "  Twan't 
happy  for  me,  miss." 

"  Because  you  were  doing1  wrong/'  said  Marian. 

"  It  was  a  brave  act  of  yours,  my  dear  cousin, 
and  I  am  proud  to  call  you  so  now,"  I  added. 

"  I  am  not  a  baby.  I  don't  know  what  made  me 
think  of  that ;  I  wasn't  strong  enough  to  do  any 
thing  else." 

"  You  couldn't  have  done  any  better." 

"  Gorrificious  !  I  think  you  could,  miss,"  inter 
posed  the  cook. 

"  I  blinded  Peter  with  the  whiskey,  and  you 
struck  Mr.  Whippleton  with  the  whiskey  bottle, 
and  he  was  so  tipsy  he  couldn't  reach  us  till  it  was 
too  late,"  added  Marian.  "  But,  Philip,  you  must 
be  hungry.  You  haven't  eaten  anything  to-day." 

"  I  am  not  hungry,  but  I  am  faint,"  I  replied. 

"  Take  a  little  drop  of  whiskey,  Mr.  Philip,"  said 
Peter,  turning  to  me. 

"  Not  a  drop :  I  would  faint  away  a  dozen  times 
before  I  would  touch  a  drop.  Go  down  and  bring 
me  up  some  tea,  and  cook  me  a  beefsteak,  Peter." 

"  Yes,  sir,"  replied  he,  hastening  below,  ap 
parently  glad  to  get  out  of  the  reach  of  a  pistol 
ball. 


THE    CATASTROPHES    CfF    A    CLERK.  305 

"  I  can  scarcely  believe  that  we  are  still  safe, 
Philip/'  continued  Marian. 

"  I  owe  my  safety  to  you,  cousin." 

"  And  I  certainly  owe  mine  to  you." 

"  We  can  call  it  square,  then ;  but  not  many 
young  ladies,  I  am  sure,  would  have  been  so  cou 
rageous  as  you  were.  The  battle  was  lost  when 
you  came  to  the  rescue." 

"  I  shall  never  cease  to  be  grateful  to  you  for 
your  care  and  protection,  Philip." 

"  And  I  shall  be  just  as  grateful  to  you.  Let  us 
both  thank  God,  from  the  depths  of  our  hearts,  for 
his  goodness  to  us." 

"  Do  you  know  where  we  are,  Philip  ? "  she 
asked,  glancing  over  the  waste  of  waters  ahead 
of  us. 

"  Not  exactly ;  but  I  think  I  can  find  my  way 
back  to  Chicago." 

"  The  lake  is  large,  and  we  may  get  lost." 

"  No  ;  if  we  keep  on  in  our  course,  we  shall  corno 
out  somewhere.  I  don't  know  this  side  of  the 
lake,  but  I  am  tolerably  familiar  with  the  other 
side.  We  crossed  the  lake,  and  have  sailed  to  the 
northward  since  one  or  two  o'clock  this  morning, 
when  Mr.  Whippleton  hit  me  on  the  head." 
20 


306  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OH 

"It  was  four  o'clock  in  the  morning;  I  asked 
Peter,"  said  Marian. 

"  Very  well.  It  was  not  far  from  two  when  we 
came  about  this  afternoon.  We  sailed  towards  the 
north  about  ten  hours,  and  I  should  judge  that  we 
made  at  least  fifty  miles.  I  think  I  can  tell  by  this 
map  nearly  where  we  are.  •  As  I  understand  it 
now,  our  course  is  south-west,  and  we  have  not 
less  than  a  hundred  miles  to  make." 

"  How  long  will  it  take  ?  " 

"As  the  breeze  is  now,  it  will  take  twenty 
hours.  We  shall  arrive  some  time  to-morrow." 

Peter  brought  my  dinner  on  deck,  and  though 
my  appetite  had  been  spoiled  by  the  rough  expe 
rience  of  the  trip,  I  ate  enough  to  make  me  feel 
tolerably  strong.  Marian  kept  the  helm  all  the 
afternoon,  and  I  lay  upon  the  cushions  where  I  ob 
tained  a  little  sleep,  which  made  my  head  feel  bet 
ter.  The  fair  helmswoman  promised  to  wake  me 
if  anything  went  wrong.  About  sunset  Mr.  Whip- 
pleton  came  to  his  senses  again.  He  had  been 
asleep  most  of  the  time,  for  we  heard  him  snore. 

"  0,  my  head ! "  groaned  he,  as  he  opened  his 
eyes,  and  then  rolled  off  the  cushions  in  his  efforts 
to  get  up. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      307 

I  called  Peter,  and  we  put  bim  back  again. 

"  My  head  !     My  head  !  "  repeated  he. 

"  Mine  felt  so  this  morning/'  I  replied,  in  consol 
ing  tones. 

He  struggled  to  rise,  but  the  rope  had  been 
carefully  secured. 

"  Untie  me,  Phil,"  cried  he,  angrily. 

"  Excuse  me/'  I  replied.  "  I  have  you  where  I 
want  you,  and  for  your  sake  I  hope  we  shall  have 
a  quick  passage  to  Chicago.'7 

"Is  she  headed  for  Chicago?" 

"  Yes,  and  has  been  for  four  hours.  The  tables 
are  turned." 

"  Untie  me,  Phil.     I  am  in  great  pain." 

"  If  I  can  do  anything  to  relieve  your  pain,  I 
will,  but  I  will  not  untie  you." 

He  pleaded  and  begged  for  me  to  release  him, 
but  I  dared  not  do  so.  He  complained  bitterly  of 
his  head,  and  made  me  various  offers  to  let  him 
go.  I  assured  him  that  I  should  hand  him  over  to 
the  police  the  next  day ;  until  then,  I  would  do 
anything  I  could  to  make  him  comfortable,  except 
to  give  him  his  liberty.  I  brought  up  the  bedding 
and  pillows  belonging  to  one  of  the  berths  in  the 
cabin,  and  prepared  an  easy  couch  beneath  him. 


308  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

I  directed  Peter  to  give  him  his  supper,  and  to 
feed  him  like  a  child.  He  said  he  was  comfortable 
then,  but  begged  for  whiskey.  I  refused  to  honor 
this  demand ;  and  finding  that  Peter  was  boozing 
more  than  I  deemed  best,  I  emptied  all  the  bot 
tles  into  the  lake,  with  the  hope  that  the  fish 
would  not  be  harmed  by  it. 

Marian  retired  at  an  early  hour  •  but  she  came 
on  deck  in  the  middle  of  the  night,  and  insisted 
upon  taking  the  helm ;  yet  I  dared  not  sleep,  for 
the  wind  was  freshening,  and  we  spent  the  rest  of 
the  night  in  talking.  At  daylight  I  discovered 
the  steeples  of  Chicago  in  the  distance.  We  had 
a  stiff  breeze  then,  and  at  six  o'clock  I  ran  the 
Marian  into  the  river. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      309 


CHAPTER    XXVII. 

IN  WHICH    PHIL   VISITS    MR.    COLLINGSBY    AGAIN,   AND 
IS    A   HERO    IN   SPITE    OF    HIMSELF. 

HAYING  run  the  Marian  into  the  river,  I 
brought  her  alongside  the  pier  at  her  usual 
landing-place.  I  was  very  tired,  and  my  head  still 
ached  severely.  I  had  hardly  touched  the  pier 
before  a  man  stepped  on  board  without  any  in 
vitation,  and  came  aft  to  the  standing-room  where 
I  was. 

"  Who  runs  this  boat  now  ?  "  demanded  he. 

"  I  have  been  running  her  for  the  last  few 
hours,"  I  replied. 

"  What's  her  name  ?  " 

"  Her  name  is  the  Marian  now.  Formerly  it  was 
the  Michigan." 

"  All  right,  then.  I  attach  her,  and  take  posses 
sion,  in  the  suit  of  Washburn  versus  Waterford." 

"  I'm  willing ;  I  have  no  further  use  for  her,"  I 
replied.  "  But  what's  the  trouble  ?  " 


310  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OB 

"  Mr.  Waterford's  gone  up." 

"  Gone  up  where  ?  " 

"  Failed,  and  those  that  can  get  hold  of  anything 
are  doing  so.  I  have  got  hold  of  this  boat." 

"  I  thought  Mr.  Waterford  was  a  rich  man/'  I 
added,  glancing  at  Marian. 

"  Most  people  thought  so ;  but  he  is  a  bankrupt 
now.  He  made  some  ten  or  twelve  thousand  dol 
lars,  they  say,  in  a  lucky  speculation,  and  on  the 
strength  of  that  has  had  the  reputation  of  being 
worth  a  hundred  thousand.  He  and  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton  have  been  making  some  bad  speculations  in 
lands,  which  will  not  fetch  what  they  paid  for 
them.  While  they  were  looking  over  the  affairs 
of  Mr.  Whippleton,  who  ran  away,  they  found  that 
Waterford  was  as  deep  in  the  mud  as  he  was  in 
the  mire.  I  have  been  on  the  lookout  for  this 
boat  since  night  before  last." 

"  What  has  been  done  about  Mr.  Whippleton's 
affairs  ?  "  I  asked,  with  no  little  curiosity. 

"  His  partner  has  been  overhauling  his  business, 
and  finds  that  he  has  been  terribly  swindled.  Offi 
cers  have  been  on  the  lookout  for  him  since  he 
left,  and  telegrams  have  been  sent  in  every  direc 
tion.  They  can't  find  him,  or  even  hear  of  him. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      311 

He  went  off  in  his  boat,  and  they  think  now  that 
he  has  made  his  way  into  Canada.  Where  have 
you  been  all  this  time  with  the  boat  ?  " 

"  On  a  cruise.     Are  you  an  officer  ?  "  I  asked. 

"  Certainly  I  am.  How  could  I  serve  a  writ  if 
I  were  not  ?  " 

"  Do  you  know  where  there  is  another  one  ?  " 

"  I  can  find  a  policeman,  I  suppose.  What  do 
you  want  of  him  ?  " 

"  I  have  a  prisoner  I  wish  to  put  into  safe 
keeping." 

"  Who  is  he  ?  " 

"  Mr.  Charles  Whippleton." 

"  You  don't  say  so  ! "  exclaimed  the  officer. 

I  pulled  off  the  blankets  in  which  the  late  junior 
partner  had  enfolded  himself,  and  exhibited  my 
prisoner. 

"  What's  the  matter  with  him?     Is  he  sick  ?  " 

"  He  has  a  sore  head.  But  please  to  get  another 
officer,  and  a  carriage." 

"  Let  him  get  two.     I  want  one,"  said  Marian. 

"  I  don't  know  you ;  but  I  begin  to  think  you 
are  the  clerk  that  disappeared,"  added  the  man. 

"I  am ;  I  was  in  the  employ  of  Collingsby  and 
Whippleton." 


312  DESK    AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  Nobody  knew  what  bad  become  of  you ;  but 
Mr.  Whippleton's  mother  said  you  had  run  away 
with  all  her  property.  The  officers  are  on  the 
lookout  for  you  also." 

"  I  am  at  their  disposal  whenever  they  want 
me,"  I  replied,  choking  at  this  disagreeable  infor 
mation. 

"  Mr.  Collingsby  thinks  you  have  gone  with 
Whippleton,  and  that  you  were  concerned  with 
him  in  the  frauds." 

"Does  he?" 

"Is  this  lady  Miss  Collingsby?" 

"It  is." 

"Her  father  and  mother  believe  she  has  run 
away  with  Mr.  Waterford.  There's  all  sorts  of 
stories  floating  about.  I  suppose,  if  I  bring  one 
of  the  police,  they  will  arrest  you." 

"  No  matter  for  that ;  bring  him  along.  If  I  had 
been  guilty,  I  should  not  have  brought  Mr.  Whip 
pleton  back." 

The  officer  departed,  and  I  lowered  the  mainsail. 
I  told  Peter  to  put  the  yacht  in  good  order. 

"Can't  you  untie  me  now,  Phil?"  asked  Mr. 
Whippleton. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       313 

"Not  till  the  officers  come.  I  don't  intend  to 
make  any  more  blunders." 

"  You  have  wound  me  up  completely/'  said  he, 
bitterly,  as  he  glanced  towards  the  city.  "  I  sup 
pose  I  must  take  things  as  they  come." 

"  Your  mother  accuses  me  of  running  away 
witb  her  property.  How  could  that  be  if  she  gave 
you  an  order  for  the  package  ?  "  I  inquired. 

"  I  dare  say  you  will  get  at  the  whole  truth  in 
due  time.  It  is  not  necessary  for  me  to  say  any 
thing  more." 

And  he  did  not  say  anything  more.  He  was  in 
pain  bodily  ;  but  I  am  sure  his  sufferings  mentally 
were  infinitely  more  intense.  As  I  looked  at  him, 
reclining  on  his  couch,  I  could  not  help  thinking 
that  his  mother  was  even  more  to  blame  for  his 
misfortunes  than  he  was  himself.  Instead  of  filling 
his  mind  with  Christian  principles,  she  had  fed 
him  with  the  dry  husks  of  worldly  wisdom.  She 
had  taught  him  to  get  money ;  that  it  was  shrewd 
and  praiseworthy  to  overreach  and  deceive.  His 
father  had  died  when  he  was  young,  and  his  mother 
had  had  the  whole  training  of  him.  Before  God, 
she  was  responsible,  though  her  neglect  and  her 
errors  could  not  excuse  him.  I  thanked  God 


314 

anew,  as  I  looked  at  him,  for  the  Christian  teach 
ings  of  Mr.  Gracewood,  who  had  implanted  in  my 
soul  a  true  principle. 

The  officers  came,  and  Mr.  Whippleton  was  re 
lieved  of  his  bonds,  and  permitted  to  stand  up. 
He  could  not  walk  at  first,  and  had  to  be  assisted 
to  the  carriage.  I  was  careful  to  have  his  travel 
ling  bag  placed  in  the  care  of  the  officers.  I  had 
locked  it  up  in  the  cabin  when  I  obtained  posses 
sion  of  the  yacht,  for  I  knew  that  its  contents 
would  go  far  towards  indemnifying  his  partner  for 
his  losses.  At  my  request,  the  officers  took  the 
prisoner  to  Mr.  Collingsby's  house.  Marian  and  I 
went  in  one  carriage,  while  the  officers,  with  Mr. 
Whippleton,  occupied  the  other. 

li  I  tremble  when  I  think  of  meeting  my  father,'7 
said  my  fair  companion. 

"  You  need  not.  He  will  be  too  glad  to  see  you 
safe  and  sound  to  find  any  fault  with  you." 

"  I  have  been  very  imprudent." 

"  I  know  you  have  ;  but  you  meant  no  wrong. 
You  are  fortunate  to  be  able  to  return  as  you  are, 
for  Mr.  Waterford  is  a  bankrupt,  and  a  mere  ad 
venturer." 

"  My  father  was  right." 


1 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      315 

"  Fathers  are  almost  always  right,"  I  replied,  as 
the  carriage  stopped  before  the  house. 

I  found  that  Marian  was  trembling  violently 
when  I  helped  her  out.  We  were  admitted  to  the 
library.  Mrs.  Collingsby  was  up,  but  her  husband 
had  not  risen  yet.  The  fond  mother  folded  her 
lost  daughter  in  her  arms,  and  they  wept  together. 

"  Let  me  call  your  father,"  said  she,  leaving  the 
room  hastily. 

"  You  will  have  a  glad  welcome  from  both  of 
your  parents,  Marian/'  I  added. 

"  My  mother  will  not  reproach  me,"  said  she,  as 
Mrs.  Collingsby  returned. 

"  Where  have  you  been  ?  "  inquired  the  anxious 
mother,  as  she  took  the  hand  of  her  weeping 
daughter. 

"  I  was  deceived,  mother." 

"  But  where  is  Mr.  Waterford  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know ;  I  have  not  seen  him  since  day 
before  yesterday." 

Mr.  Collingsby  appeared  in  a  few  moments  in 
his  dressing-gown,  and  had  evidently  made  a  very 
hasty  toilet. 

"  Marian  !  "  exclaimed  he,  with  a  degree  of  emo 
tion  of  which  I  had  not  supposed  him  capable. 


316  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OB 

"  My  poor  child  !  How  anxious  I  have  been  about 
you  !  for  that  Waterford  is  a  scoundrel." 

"  I  know  he  is,  father.  You  were  right/'  re 
plied  Marian,  as  she  sobbed  upon  his  bosom. 

"Where  is  he  now?'7 

"  I  don't  know." 

Mr.  Collingsby  winked  very  rapidly;  but  as  it 
was  not  dignified  to  weep,  he  did  not  do  so.  He 
glanced  at  me,  and  he  must  have  suspected  that  I 
saw  his  emotion.  He  was  evidently  ashamed  of 
it,  for  he  gently  disengaged  himself  from  his 
daughter's  embrace,  and  fixed  his  stern  gaze 
upon  me. 

"  So  you  have  come  back,  Philips  ?  "  said  he. 

"  Yes,  sir,  I  have  come  back.  I  had  business 
here,  and  I  took  the  liberty  to  call." 

"  Where  have  you  been,  sir  ?  " 

"  After  Mr.  Whippleton." 

"  So  I  thought,"  sneered  he.  "  I  suppose  it 
would  not  suit  your  purpose  to  inform  me  where 
he  is  now." 

"  On  the  contrary,  it  would  exactly  suit  my  pur 
pose,  Mr.  Collingsby.  He  is  in  ,a  carriage  at  the 
door,  between  two  officers." 

"Don't  say  anything  harsh  to  Philip,  father/' 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.       317 

interposed  Marian,  wounded  by  his  sternness 
towards  me.  "  It  was  he  who  saved  me  from 
harm;  and  he  has  brought  Mr.  Whippleton  back, 
with  all  the  money  he  stole." 

"  Do  you  mean  so?" 

I  went  to  the  door,  and  requested  the  officers  to 
bring  in  their  prisoner. 

u  Is  it  possible  that  I  have  been  mistaken  in 
you,  young  man  ?  "  added  Mr.  Collingsby,  glancing 
at  me  again.  "  I  was  satisfied  that  you  had  run 
away  with  my  partner,  because  you  had  shared 
his  guilt." 

"  You  were  mistaken,  sir,"  I  answered,  as  the 
officers  conducted  Mr.  Whippleton  into  the  room. 

The  prisoner  was  very  feeble,  and  was  placed  in 
an  arm-chair.  His  head  was  tied  up  with  a  hand 
kerchief,  and  he  looked  as  miserable  as  a  human 
being  could.  He  was  not  a  man  of  great  courage, 
and  his  mishaps  appeared  to  have  broken  his 
spirit. 

"What's  the  matter  with  him?"  asked  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby,  turning  to  me. 

"  He  was  hurt  on  the  head." 

"  Philip  had  a  hard  battle  with  him,  father ;  but 
finally  struck  him  down,  and  he  fell  senseless." 


318  DESK   AND    DEBIT,    OR 

"  I  ought  to  add,  Mr.  Collingsby,  that  Marian 
was  the  bravest  girl  I  ever  saw.  I  should  have 
lost  the  battle,  and  I  doubt  if  you  would  ever 
have  seen  either  your  partner  or  your  money,  if 
she  had  not  taken  part  in  the  struggle/'  I  inter 
posed. 

"  All  this  makes  a  very  strange  story." 

"  Perhaps  you  had  better  hear  the  rest  of  it  be 
fore  you  judge,"  I  replied.  "  T  thought  it  possible, 
after  I  left  you  day  before  yesterday,  that  Mr. 
Whippleton  had  gone  off  in  his  boat,  and  I  hastened 
to  her  moorings.  My  supposition  was  correct." 

"  We  knew  he  had  gone  in  his  boat,  but  we  sup 
posed  he  would  land  at  some  town  on  the  other 
side,"  said  Mr.  Collingsby.  "  Officers  were  sent  to 
Detroit  and  Toledo  to  intercept  him." 

Marian  and  I  told  our  story  as  I  have  already 
related  it,  and  we  had  an  attentive  and  interested 
audience. 

"  But  what  has  become  of  Waterford  ? "  asked 
one  of  the  officers.  "  If  he  was  left  at  the  creek, 
he  must  have  gone  somewhere." 

"  He  won't  go  far,  for  he  has  not  a  hundred  dol 
lars  in  the  world,"  said  Mr.  Whippleton.  "  Phil 
defeated  all  our  plans." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      319 

All  the  party  looked  at  me  so  earnestly  that  1 
am  afraid  I  blushed ;  for,  conceited  as  I  am,  it  dis 
turbs  me  to  be  made  a  hero. 

"  What  were  your  plans,  Mr.  Whippleton  ? " 
asked  Mr.  Collingsby. 

"  I  suppose  I  have  nothing  to  gain  by  conceal 
ment,"  replied  the  culprit.  "  If  I  had  never  seen 
Wat-erf ord,  I  might  have  been  an  honest  man 
to-day.  I  went  into  some  land  speculations  with 
him.  We  bought  two  hundred  acres  at  Bloomvale, 
confident  that  the  new  Blank  and  Plank  Railroad 
would  pass  through  the  centre  of  it,  for  it  was  one 
of  the  routes  surveyed,  and  we  had  an  assurance 
that  it  would  be  the  one  adopted.  Instead  of 
coming  direct  to  the  city,  as  we  were  almost  cer 
tain  it  would,  they  tapped  the  North  Central,  and 
left  our  land  ten  miles  from  any  road,  and  good  for 
nothing  but  farming  purposes.  We  spent  ten 
thousand  dollars  in  log-rolling  in  the  legislature, 
and  were  defeated  in  the  end.  I  took  forty  thou 
sand  dollars  out  of  the  funds  of  the  firm,  which  I 
intended  to  replace  when  I  sold  my  land.  Phil's 
trial  balance  first  frightened  me,  and  finding  that 
I  could  not  get  out  of  the  scrape,  I  decided  to 
take  what  money  I  could  get,  and  go  to  China. 


320  DESK   AND   DEBIT,    OR 

where  I  hoped  to  win  a  fortune,  and  make  good 
my  losses  here.     I  had  started  for  Europe  when  I 
left   in   the    Fiorina,  and   should  have  got  off  if 
Phil  had  not  followed  me." 
I  was  a  hero  in  spite  of  myself. 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OP  A  CLERK.      321 


CHAPTER    XXVIII. 

IN  WHICH   PHIL    MORALIZES    UPON   WORLDLY   WISDOM, 
AND   BIDS   FAREWELL   TO   DESK   AND   DEBIT. 

THE  conference  was  interrupted  by  the  arrival 
of  Mr.  Collingsby,  senior,  who  had  been  sent 
for.  He  gave  his  granddaughter  a  very  cordial 
greeting,  and  the  events  which  had  transpired 
were  all  rehearsed  for  his  benefit. 

"  How  did  you  expect  to  get  away  in  your 
yacht?"  asked  the  senior  partner. 

"  Waterford  was  to  go  with  me.  A  friend  in  St. 
Joseph  had  offered  me  a  thousand  dollars  for  my 
boat,  and  I  expected  to  sell  her  to  him.  We  then 
intended  to  sail  through  the  lakes  to  Collingwood, 
and  proceed  to  Montreal.  Waterford  was  to  have 
made  Marian  his  wife  at  St.  Joseph." 

"  The  scoundrel !  "  ejaculated  the  father. 

"  He  was  to  return,  make  his  peace  with  you, 
and  save  me  from  harm.  We  should  have  suo 
21 


322  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OB 

ceeded  if  Phil  had  not  been  so  zealous  to  serve 
the  firm.  He  upset  my  calculations  no  less  than 
three  times,  and  finally  broke  my  head.  You  have 
no  fault  to  find  with  him,  Mr.  Collingsby,  however 
it  may  be  with  me." 

"  Mr.  Philips,  I  trust  you  will  excuse  any  harsh 
words  I  may  have  used,"  said  the  senior  partner. 

"  Certainly,  sir ;  but  my  name  is  not  Philips." 

"What  is  it?" 

".Philip  Farringford,  sir." 

"  Yes,  father,  and  he  is  my  own  cousin,"  added 
Marian. 

"  Nonsense  !  We  will  talk  of  that  some  other 
time." 

"  I  think  you  had  better  open  that  bag,"  I  sug 
gested. 

It  was  opened,  and  all  the  money  which  the 
junior  partner  had  gathered  together  was  taken 
from  it.  Mrs.  Whippleton's  treasure  was  found, 
just  as  I  had  left  it,  with  the  seals  unbroken. 

"  That  is  PhiPs,  and  contains  nothing  belonging 
to  the  firm,"  said  Mr.  Whippleton,  as  the  officer 
produced  the  package.  "  I  hope  you  will  give  it 
to  him." 

I  explained  the  nature  of  the  contents,  and  to 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      323 

my  great  gratification  it  was  restored  to  me.  The 
graceless  son  acknowledged  that  he  had  signed  his 
mother's  name  to  the  order  upon  me  for  its  deliv 
ery.  He  had  procured  the  nurse  for  his  mother, 
and  she  informed  him  what  had  been  done  during 
our  interview.  It  appeared  that  she  had  placed 
herself  at  the  door  for  this  purpose. 

"  Mr.  Collingsby,  I  hope  you  don't  intend  to  pro 
ceed  against  me,  now  that  I  have  made  all  the  res 
titution  in  my  power,"  said  the  culprit. 

"  I  don't  know  ;  I  will  see." 

"  The  false  invoices  cover  about  forty  thousand 
dollars.  My  capital  in  the  firm,  and  my  share  of 
the  profits,  will  reimburse  you  for  about  thirty 
thousand.  I  will  give  you  a  deed  of  my  lands  for 
the  balance,  so  that  you  will  lose  nothing  by  me." 

"  I  have  lost  through  you  my  confidence  in  man 
kind,"  replied  Mr.  Collingsby.  "  I  have  no  desire 
to  persecute  you." 

"  I  have  given  up  every  dollar  I  took  with  me. 
My  yacht  will  bring  a  thousand  dollars.  You  shall 
have  that." 

"  I  will  take  the  boat  at  that  price,  and  place 
the  amount  to  your  credit." 

"  Thank  you,  sir." 


324 

"  For  the  rest,  I  will  consider  the  matter ;  but 
for  the  present,  you  must  be  where  I  can  find 
you." 

The  officers  conveyed  him  to  the  prison,  where 
he  had  an  opportunity  to  reflect  upon  the  folly  of 
worldly  wisdom. 

"  Philips,  you  have  done  well,"  said  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby,  as  the  door  closed  upon  the  departing 
junior  of  the  firm.  "  You  have  been  honest  and 
faithful,  and  I  thank  you." 

"  So  do  I,"  added  the  old  gentleman.  "  It  seems 
we  haven't  lost  anything,  after  all." 

"  Philips  has  —  " 

"  Philip,  if  you  please,  sir,"  I  interposed. 

"  Excuse  me  ;  Philip  has  saved  us  from  loss,  and 
as  he  is  very  fond  of  boats,  I  propose  to  make  him 
a  present  of  the  yacht  belonging  to  Mr.  Whipple- 
ton,  as  a  testimonial  of  our  gratitude.  What  do 
you  say,  father  ?  " 

"  Certainly,  Richard,"  replied  the  patriarch. 

"  I  have  already  taken  Mr.  Faxon  into  the  firm, 
and  the  business  will  continue  as  before.  Of 
course  we  shall  retain  you  as  book-keeper,  and 
your  salary  will  hereafter  be  one  thousand  dollars 
a  year." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      325 

"  I  thank  you,  gentlemen.  I  am  very  grateful 
to  you  for  your  kindness  and  consideration,"  I  re 
plied,  satisfied  that  virtue  is  its  own  reward  even 
in  this  world. 

"  Beyond  this,  I  am  greatly  indebted  to  you  for 
your  services  to  my  daughter." 

"  My  cousin  was  very  kind  to  me,"  said  Marian, 
archly. 

"  Your  cousin  !  " 

"  Yes,  father  ;  he  is  really  my  cousin." 

"  Pshaw  !     How  can  he  be  your  cousin  ?  " 

"His  name  is  Philip  Farringford.  His  mother 
was  your  sister." 

"  Come,  come  ;  no  more  of  this.  We  have  had 
romance  enough  for  one  day,"  said  the  old  gentle 
man.  "  I  have  been  annoyed  by  letters  from  Far 
ringford  in  St.  Louis,  hinting  at  something  of  this 
kind." 

"  I  am  sorry  the  letters  annoyed  you,  sir ;  but 
my  father  wrote  only  the  truth,"  I  replied. 

"  Your  father  !  Do  you  mean  to  assert  that  my 
miserable  son-in-law  is  your  father  ? "  added  the 
old  gentleman,  savagely. 

"  I  do,  sir." 

"  But  my  daughter  is  not  your  mother  ?  " 


326 

"  Yes,  sir ;  she  is." 

"  That's  enough.  I  don't  want  to  hear  another 
word  about  the  matter ;  and  what's  more,  I  will 
not." 

"  We  can  prove  all  that  we  assert,  sir,"  I  re 
plied,  firmly. 

"  Not  another  word  about  it.  I  want  to  believe 
that  you  are  an  honest  and  honorable  young  man  ; 
but  I  can't  do  it  if  you  attempt  to  maintain  such  a 
gross  imposture.  It  is  ridiculous." 

"  I  arn  very  anxious  that  you  should  hear  the 
story,  sir.  If  you  are  not  satisfied  with  the  evi 
dence,  you  shall  never  be  annoyed  again  con 
cerning  it." 

"  I  won't  hear  it,"  protested  the  senior  Mr.  Col- 
lingsby.  '-'Did  you  come  here,  arid  get  a  place  in 
our  firm,  for  the  purpose  of  pushing  this  impo 
sition?" 

"  I  desire  to  establish  my  birthright ;  but  there 
was  no  conspiracy  about  my  coming." 

"  My  son-in-law  is  a  miserable  toper.  I  never 
want  to  see  or  hear  from  him  again.  He  has 
brought  disgrace  and  misery  enough  into  my  fam 
ily.  He  teased  me  for  money  till  I  was  obliged  to 
leave  St.  Louis,  and  now  he  follows  me  here; 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      327 

Young  man,  whatever  your  name  may  be,  I  have 
a  high  regard  for  you  after  what  you  have  done, 
and  we  will  use  you  well  in  the  future ;  but  never 
mention  this  matter  again.  If  you  do,  you  shall 
leave  us.  I  say  it,  and  I  mean  it.77 

Under  the  circumstances  I  could  say  no  more. 
The  time  for  proving  my  claim  evidently  had  not 
come.  I  made  no  promises  in  regard  to  the  for 
bidden  topic ;  but  I  decided  to  wait  for  a  more 
favorable  opportunity  to  press  the  subject.  I  was 
invited  to  breakfast  with  the  family,  and  accepted. 
I  was  vexed  and  mortified  to  find  that  I  was  not 
acknowledged  as  a  nephew,  grandson,  and  cousin; 
but  I  found  that  I  had  one  believer  in  Marian.  I 
had  convinced  her  with  my  unsupported  word ; 
but  I  intended  to  show  her  the  evidence. 

After  breakfast  I  went  to  my  boarding-house,  and 
repaired  at  once  to  Mrs.  Whippleton's  room.  She 
was  better  than  when  I  had  left  her,  three  days 
before,  and  was  able  to  open  upon  me  in  a  volley 
of  reproaches  for  my  treachery  and  dishonesty,  as 
she  bluntly  called  them. 

"  I  thought  there  wan?t  but  one  honest  feller  in 
the  world,  and  I  was  cheated  in  him,"  said  she, 
bitterly. 


328  DESK   AND   DEBIT,   OR 

"  Not  exactly,  Mrs.  Whippleton,"  I  replied,  hand 
ing  her  the  sealed  package.  "  There  are  your 
papers  and  your  money." 

"  No ;  you  don't  say  it ! " 

"  Open  it,  and  see." 

It  took  an  hour  for  her  to  count  the  money  and 
examine  the  papers.  She  compared  them  with 
the  receipt  I  had  given  her,  and  nothing  was 
missing. 

"  Well,  I  reckon  you  be  honest,  after  all,"  said 
she,  cheerfully.  "Who'd  'a  thought  it!  But 
where  is  Charles?  I  didn't  know  but  he  might 
got  the  papers  away  from  you.  He  wanted  to  raise 
all  the  money  he  could  to  save  himself  from  ruin." 

"  Not  for  that ;  but  to  set  himself  up  in  business 
in  China,"  I  replied ;  and  then  I  told  the  story  of 
her  son's  misdeeds. 

"  So  he's  in  jail  —  is  he  ? "  exclaimed  she. 
"  Well,  I  was  afraid  it  would  come  to  this,  when 
I  heard  he  was  in  trouble,  for  Charles  never  was 
as  shrewd  as  he  ought  to  be." 

"  Shrewd  !  "  I  replied,  in  disgust.  "  He  has  fol 
lowed  out  your  maxims  of  worldly  wisdom,  instead 
of  being  true  to  God,  himself,  and  his  fellow- 
beings  ;  and  now  he  has  his  reward." 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      329 

"  Well,  I  don't  know  what  all  that  has  to  do  with 
it.  I  say  he  wan't  shrewd,"  persisted  the  old  lady. 

"  He  has  practised  just  what  you  taught  him." 

li  No,  he  didn't !  "  replied  she.  "  He  wan't  cun 
ning." 

"  Good  by,  Mrs.  Whippleton.  I  only  hope  you 
will  live  long  enough  to  repent  of  your  sins,  and 
learn,  before  it  is  too  late,  that  worldly  wisdom 
will  not  carry  an  immortal  being  through  this 
world  and  the  world  to  come." 

I  had  not  patience  to  hear  any  more.  I  went  to 
my  room,  and  I  did  not  leave  it  for  a  week.  The 
blow  I  had  received  on  the  head,  with  the  excite 
ment  and  fatigue  of  the  cruise  down  the  lake, 
made  me  sick.  I  wrote  to  my  father  after  I  had 
been  confined  to  my  chamber  three  days ;  arid 
when  I  was  about  well  enough  to  go  out  again,  he 
came  to  see  me,  though  he  started  as  soon  as  he 
received  my  letter.  I  had  never  seen  him  looking 
so  well ;  and  certainly  I  should  never  have  sus 
pected  that  he  was  the  degraded  sot  whom  I  had 
met  in  front  of  the  Planters'  Hotel,  in  St.  Louis. 
He  was  dressed  in  sober  black,  and  was  neat,  and 
even  elegant,  in  his  appearance.  He  had  grown 
moderately  fleshy  under  the  regimen  of  total  ab- 


330 

stinence,  and  all  the  toddy-blossoms  had  disap 
peared  from  his  face. 

We  had  a  long  talk  in  my  chamber,  and  he  gave 
me  such  advice  as  the  occasion  demanded.  He 
thought  that,  as  I  had  established  myself  in  the 
good  opinion  of  the  firm,  I  had  better  stay  with 
them,  especially  as  the  salary  was  very  handsome. 

"  I  shall  hardly  be  able  to  leave  the  prohibited 
topic  untouched,"  I  added. 

"  Your  own  self  respect  should  induce  you  to 
do  that.  If  your  grandfather  and  your  uncle  will 
not  hear  you,  there  is  no  law  to  compel  them  to  do 
so.  Do  you  know  when  your  mother  intends  to 
return?" 

"  I  do  not ;  I  cannot  even  learn  where  she  is ; 
but  Marian  has  promised  to  ascertain  for  me.  I 
mean  to  stay  with  the  firm  about  a  year  longer. 
If  my  mother  don't  come  by  that  time,  I  shall  go 
for  her.  I  will  find  her." 

"  Well,  a  trip  to  Europe  will  do  you  no  harm ; 
but  she  will  probably  return  before  the  year 
is  out." 

We  decided  to  wait  the  turn  of  future  events 
because  we  could  not  help  ourselves,  rather  than 
because  we-  were  willing.  On  the  following  Mon- 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      351 

day,  I  took  my  place  in  the  counting-room  again, 
and  it  was  Desk  and  Debit  once  more.  My  father 
called  there  during  the  day  to  take  leave  of  me. 
It  so  happened  that  both  Mr.  Richard  Collingsby 
and  his  father  came  in  while  he  was  there.  They 
/ooked  at  him,  but  did  not  recognize  him.  They 
appeared  to  think  they  knew  him,  and  spoke 
to  him. 

"  I  know  your  face  very  well,"  said  Richard, 
-'  but  I  can't  call  you  by  name." 

"  My  name  is  Edward  Farringford,"  replied  my 
father. 

"  And  he  is  my  father,"  I  added. 

"  I  am  glad  to  see  you  looking  so  well,  Edward," 
said  the  old  gentleman,  coldly.  "  I  hear  you  are 
doing  well ;  but  don't  say  a  word  to  me  about  that 
silly  story." 

"  I  don't  intend  to  do  so.  I  wish  to  say,  sir, 
that  while  I  plead  guilty  to  all  you  have  charged 
upon  me  in  the  past,  I  have  no  occasion  to  ask  any 
.favors  for  the  future,  except  your  kind  regard.  I 
wish  to  see  my  wife  —  " 

"  Never,  sir  1  Never !  "  protested  Mr.  Col 
lingsby,  senior,  as  he  rushed  into  his  counting- 
room. 


332 

"  I  wish  you  well,  Ned,"  added  Mr.  Richard  \ 
"  but  I  am  sorry  to  find  you  attempting  to  impose 
upon  our  family." 

My  father  bowed,  but  made  no  reply,  and  the 
son  followed  the  father  into  the  sanctum. 

"  I  can't  stay  here,  father/'  I  protested,  cut  to 
the  quick  by  the  conduct  of  my  employers. 

"  Be  patient,  Philip.  When  I  think  what  I  was, 
I  can  hardly  blame  them.  Keep  your  place.  You 
will  be  nearer  to. your  mother  here,  when  she  re 
turns,  than  in  any  other  place." 

I  consented  to  stay,  and  I  did  stay.  My  father 
went  home  that  night,  and  I  applied  myself  dili 
gently  to  the  work  of  opening  a  new  set  of  books 
for  Collingsby  and  Faxon.  I  was  treated  with  a 
great  deal  of  consideration  by  the  senior  and  his 
father ;  but  I  never  alluded  to  my  relationship  to 
them.  I  was  sure  of  a  storm  if  I  did  so. 

Mr.  Whippleton  was  discharged  from  custody 
after  he  had  fully  indemnified  the  firm  for  its 
losses.  There  were  too  many  legal  doubts  in  the 
way  of  his  prosecution  to  render  it  advisable  to 
proceed  against  him,  even  if  the  Collingsbys  had 
been  disposed  to  do  so.  But  he  was  a  ruined 
man.  He  could  not  even  obtain  a  situation  as  a 


THE  CATASTROPHES  OF  A  CLERK.      333 

clerk  in  Chicago.  His  mother  set  him  up  in  busi 
ness  in  Cincinnati ;  but  he  failed,  and  lost  all  she 
had  loaned  him.  His  reputation  followed  him 
wherever  he  went.  He  finally  obtained  all  his 
mother's  property,  and  both  of  them  were  reduced 
to  poverty.  The  last  time  I  saw  the  old  lady,  I 
am  sure  she  was  a  better  woman,  and  was  willing 
to  confess  that  worldly  wisdom  did  not  insure 
either  success  or  happiness. 

Mr.  Waterford  was  not  seen  in  Chicago  again. 
I  afterwards  met  him  in  New  York.  Before  his 
boat  was  sold,  I  made  an  excursion  in  her  to  the 
lagoon  where  the  Fiorina  was  moored.  Marian 
and  other  ladies  went  with  me,  and  I  sailed  them 
home  in  the  yacht,  which  was  now  my  property. 
I  found  time  to  sail  in  her  occasionally,  and  the 
Collingsbys  were  often  passengers.  I.  changed 
her  name,  and  called  her  the  ELLA  GRACEWOOD. 

I  had  a  week's  vacation  in  the  summer,  and  vis 
ited  St.  Louis.  Mrs.  Greenough  was  delighted  to 
see  me,  and  treated  me  like  a  son.  When  I  re 
turned,  I  carried  with  me  the  relics  of  my  child 
hood.  One  afternoon,  on  board  of  the  Ella  Grace- 
wood,  I  showed  them  to  Marian  and  her  mother. 
Mrs.  Collingsby  recognized  the  portrait  of  my 


334  DESK    AND   DEBIT. 

mother,  and  I  think  she  was  convinced  that  I  was 
her  nephew ;  but  she  was  more  prudent  than  Mar 
ian,  and  refused  to  commit  herself. 

I  was  no  nearer  my  mother  than  when  I  came  to 
Chicago  ;  but  I  had  a  lively  hope  of  the  future.  I 
still  looked  forward  with  glowing  anticipations  to 
the  time  when  our  little  family  should  be  reunited 
under  the  same  roof. 

I  have  told  my  story,  and  related  all  the  catas 
trophes  of  a  clerk.  I  staid  in  the  counting-room 
of  Collingsby  and  Faxon  a  year  and  a  half,  when 
the  business  was  again  closed  by  the  death  of  the 
junior  partner.  Mr.  Richard  decided  to  retire,  as 
he  might  have  done  years  before.  The  new  firm, 
to  whom  the  business  was  sold,  offered  me  a  salary 
of  twelve  hundred  a  year ;  but  I  declined  it,  and 
was  again  free  from  any  engagement. 

My  mother  had  not  yet  returned.  At  the  last 
accounts  she  was  living  at  Nice,  with  her  brother, 
whose  wife  was  very  feeble.  I  was  eighteen,  and 
I  determined  to  go  to  her.  I  could  no  longer 
endure  the  separation ;  and  with  this  resolve  I 
bade  farewell  to  DESK  AND  DEBIT. 


14  DAY  USE 

RETURN  TO  DESK  FROM  WHICH  BORROWED 

LOAN  DEPT. 

This  book  is  due  on  the  last  date  stamped  below,  or 

on  the  date  to  which  renewed. 
Renewed  books  are  subject  to  immediate  recall. 


•0)05^ 


-erne 


NOV  1  9  2003 


LD  21A-60m-10,'65 
(F7763slO)476B 


General  Library 

University  of  California 

Berkeley 


U.C.  BERKELEY  LIBRARIES 


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THE  UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA  LIBRARY 


